Invader Sideos and his brainwashing techniques tell you: I've been watching Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas...wow. It's all I can say. Its gotta be tributed somewhere now. Such a great film. If I don't get to be a comic writer then I'm just gonna become a Gonzo journalist. You know, get wasted on acid, smack and drugs of all sorts while drinking copious amounts of booze and writing about shit all.

Sounds like the promised land to me.

Ok, so for this chapter...I dunno. One or two things I wanna get out the way. I'm eager to get to the end of this, not because I wanna end it, it's because I got such a FANTABULAS ending I wanna rush though and write it before my minds deletes it.

Written to...who knows? The bats are closing in...Mostly my new LIVE Guns N' Roses songs and some Johnny Thunders - Pirate Love, Born To Lose, In Cold Blood and Chinese Rocks. Also a bit of the LEGEND that is Johnny Cash - Get Rhythm, Cocaine And Whiskey and Boy Named Sue.

That's an awful lot…

I don't own Zim foooools.

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The vision behind Zim's eyes slowly faded away and he felt his consciousness returning swiftly. The sounds of fantasy faded into nothing and the sounds of reality took over; cars noisily honking and screeching in the streets, the dull roar of people walking and talking while they shopped and sometimes the sounds of dogs or cats barking and screeching in the ally.

Zim didn't open his eyes straight away, instead he lay there on his mattress. He felt so warm; everything was so soft and comfortable, so peaceful.

It was rare that Zim ever got the chance to really relax, just do nothing for a while. His job as an information gatherer was extremely demanding and when he wasn't doing that there was always something Gir had wreaked that needed repairing, or some experiment that needed fixing, or some homework that needed doing to keep his normalcy disguise, but he could always just get the computer to do those.

It was a busy life being an Invader.

As he slowly regained feeling in the rest of his body he realised his arms were wrapped around something. Something warm, thin and squishy.

Zim smiled and, for some unknown reason, gave it a squeeze without opening his eyes. He heard whatever he had hugged moan sleepily and felt something snuggle closer to him.

Zim slowly and lazily opened one eye. He seemed to be wrapped in his coat, like it was a blanket, and lying on his side with his arms wrapped tightly round a thin, black shape. He watched, still heavily seduced by a combination of drug weariness and the mornings laziness, as the thin black squashy thing rolled around to face him.

The sickly, pale green face and sparkling dark blue eyes of the bunny girl looked right at him and she gave a simple smile. "Morning to you too."

Zim closed his eyes absent mindedly and gave her another small hug. "Morning."

Suddenly it occurred to him exactly what he was doing. His eyes flew open and he jumped back, screaming. He yanked his arms away so fast that the girl he was hugging was thrown from the mattress and tumbled on to the floor.

He scrambled backward until his PAK hit the wall behind him and he stayed, shivering, while wrapping his coat tightly around him, creating a small reddish ball out of which only his eyes could be seen.

He felt, in some indescribable way, wrong, almost dirty. Showing affections in his fantasies was one thing, showing them in real life was another.

He watched, half frightened, half suspicious, as the girl slowly picked herself up. She kept her head down so the hood on her black hoody covered her face, but he could tell she was annoyed. "Jeese, Zim, do you always treat a girl like that the morning after?"

Zims eyes widened when she looked up to scowl at him. It wasn't the bunny girl, it was only Lilith. His eyes narrowed again as he realised that it was his addiction getting to him. He quickly screwed up his eyes and shook his head before looking back at Lilith, who was now sitting at the end of the mattress and tying her jet black hair up into those bunny ear-like pony tails.

Zim quickly scanned the room. It was quite early in the morning. He couldn't tell what time because he couldn't see the kitchen clock, but the distant noise in the street told him it must be around ten-ish. Shawn was still lying on the floor in roughly the same position he had been in last night and Iggy seemed to have fallen onto his side. Both were sleeping quietly, apart from Shawn who was snoring lightly.

The room glowed a myriad of browns, deep reds and even hint's of orange in the early morning light. The air was fresh and clean, washing away the feeling of need and junkie hunger from the night before.

The clock was ticking, Zim thought, until it would start all over again. One hour of peace, then the internal screaming would begin once more.

He turned back to Lilith and watched her with curious eyes as she silently finished her hair and began to pat the pockets on her hoody, then on her pants. She looked at Zim and hurriedly asked, "Do you have any cigs?"

"No," Zim answered rather too quickly. Inside he was violently battling with that feeling again. The one that seemed to have the power to destroy his speech and actions around this female. His mind tried to place together some sort of scenario where he could act on this feeling, but the only thing that would play in his minds eye was him grabbing her arms tightly, then letting go and screaming in anger, then grabbing her again and so on. Every now and then he would scream and then tear parts of his own arms off in confused anger.

Again Zim shook his mind clear of this and decided that the best option overall would be to leave, get away from this female and the mental hold she had on him. This mass of confusion, rage, wanting whatever the humans called it, that battled within him needed to be stopped, the sooner the better.

He quietly got up as Lilith sneaked a cigarette from Shawn's top pocket. She watched him with a raised eyebrow as she lit her cigarette. "Where are you going?"

He stopped at the door and half looked at her. His mind came up with a hundred excuses, but his mouth only managed to stumble out, "Oh, err, breakfast."

All he wanted to do was get out that door, which he was already half way through, when the teenager behind him cheerily shouted, "I'll come with you! I'm starving."

Zim spun round, almost panicking. "No!"

Lilith stopped where she had been walking over to him; her eyes became wide with confusion. Then she closed them and laughed slightly. "It's ok, I can pay for myself, you know."

She walked past the frozen Irken, while taking in her cigarette and said, "Come on, you don't wanna miss the breakfast hours, do you?"

Zim gave a short cough at the cloud of smoke that she blew out and quietly followed her.

--

Zim sat in the booth of the diner. He had chosen to sit in the furthest corner this time. He didn't want a repeat of yesterday's incident.

Last time he was lucky it was only Keef, next time it could be anyone. Even Gaz last night had proven to be too close of a shave. He was avoiding anyone he knew from his old life as much as possible. He felt rather depressed this morning and didn't really feel like talking to anyone, or explaining his company.

His eyes scanned the cafe; it was the same small, quiet place he had visited yesterday. However, this morning it has considerably more crowded, the air bristling with chatter and people happily enjoying their holidays. Zim shifted down a bit further into his seat. He really didn't feel like being outside today, it was colder then usual and the sun, despite its weakness, stung his eyes.

The table was a classic picturesque coffee diner table. White, but not too white, plastic table with two red leather seats that had unprepared scratches and cuts. They were uncomfortable to sit on, but not as bad as the mattresses back at the thunders hotel.

Zim tightened the white bandage on his arm a bit more and gave a kid, who was staring at him from the left opposite booth, a look that could have made a baby cry. It certainly made the kid whimper and look away quickly.

Zim growled. Damn humans and their staring eyes.

He looked up and watched with little real interest as Lilith, who sat opposite him, read a newspaper she had found lying on the seat. Zim could see the headline read 'UN Puts Pressure On Latin America To Shut Down On Aswermitus Farms' and he blinked slowly, again not caring.

"You're very quiet."

Zim snapped back to reality from where he had been staring into space and hugging his arms. "What?"

"I said," and Lilith turned a page of the newspaper, "you're being very quiet. Are you always this quiet, or is it just at breakfast?"

"Errm." It seemed as though he still couldn't speak around her. "I dunno."

Zim could have smashed his face on the table for that one. Since when did he ever not know anything?

He watched nervously as the female gave him a curious look from the top of her paper before she buffed it and turned a page. "I see..."

There was another moment of silence that seemed to go on for too long before Lilith again broke it. "Interesting..."

"What?" Zim quickly asked as he unconsciously began to tap his claws on the table.

Without looking up she slowly said, "Membrane lab's stocks have risen rather quickly lately."

Zim raised an antenna and looked at her in confusion. Noticing this, she set the paper down to explain. "I have a theory that the sudden explosion in A dealing is linked to Membrane labs, like they're secretly dealing it to make enough money to bale them out of the failure of super cabbage." She leaned forward once more with a sly smile. "But they'll deny it, of course. Not even Professor Membrane could get out of dealing drugs on this sorta scale." She then leaned back, putting away the paper. "What'da think?"

Zim laughed. "I think it's a stu-pid theory."

She smirked. "Only as stupid as that haircut of yours."

Zim froze, he had forgotten all about his lack of wig. A hand shot to his head, flattening down his antenna.

She cocked her head slightly and slowly nodded. "But…it's original, so that's cool."

He breathed a sigh of relief and thanked the way that humans are so often blind to the completely obvious.

He felt like he should say something. "Erm…thanks?"

Lilith grinned wolfishly. "See, I knew I could get you talking."

Zim suddenly froze again and looked horrified, immediately looking down and away from her.

She cocked her head slightly. "What's the matter?"

For a moment Zim darted a look back to her, then narrowed his eyes and slowly said "You are."

Lilith leaned back into her seat cautiously. "What?"

Zim suddenly exploded; all the rage and confusion just came flying from within him and out through his mouth. He couldn't stop himself. He could almost see himself turn to her, eyes radiating fury as he ranted. "YOU ARE! I don't know how you do it, but you're always in here!" and he poked the side of his head. "I don't know whether you're an Irken or not and frankly I don't care, but the problem is I DO CARE! I don't know what you've done to me, but every time I see you I can't speak! I can't think! I don't know what's happening, but YOU'RE TO BLAME!"

Lilith simply looked at him, shocked. She looked like she had just been told Christmas had been cancelled. Zim continued to rant for several more minutes until he finally seemed to run low on breath.

"I can't even properly explain it! Maybe you're in league with the Dib-stink and this is just some horrid pay back for me running away from him or something, I don't know!"

Zim calmed down slightly, taking deep breaths and brushing a hand over his head, flattening one of his antennas. He glanced away from her, then back. "So," his voice was still dripping with anger. "Do you mind telling me what you're trying to do to me?"

Lilith sat there and bridged her fingers together. She went to say something, then stopped, instead placing her index fingers on her top lip and sighing slightly. Without looking at Zim she reached into her pockets, then growled and quietly said "damm, I forgot to get some cigarettes."

Then she looked back to a still fuming, but quiet, Zim and sighed again. "Ok." She placed her hands down on the table, spreading her fingers, and then bridging them again. "Ok," she repeated, this time more quietly.

Zim was tapping his foot under the table and was beginning to get impatient with her. He was about to ask again when she finally began talking. However, she never made any eye contact. "Look, Zim, I'm going to be straight with you. I'm not really looking for any boyfriends right now."

This was not what he was expecting her to say. "Eh?"

She finally looked him in the eye. "If what you're describing is correct, then you have a crush...on me."

Zim was even more bemused. "Zim does not feel squashed."

She looked at him blankly, then suddenly burst out giggling. "Squashed! That's a good one!" But when she saw Zim wasn't joking she quickly stopped.

Slowly she said "You've...never had a crush before?"

Zim leaned back and crossed his arms. "I don't even know what this crush thing is."

Lilith's eyes widened with shock. "Wow, you must have led a really sheltered life, huh?" Zim didn't respond, he only narrowed his eyes in annoyance, causing Lilith to quickly continue. "Well it's...you know..." She scratched the back of her head. "A crush, puppy love and all that."

Zim slowly raised an antenna. "Love?"

Lilith nodded and looked away. "Yea, but its not real love, it's just-"

"That's impossible; Zim can't love," he cut in, drawing a confused stare from the human.

"Why not?" she implored.

The Irken crossed his arms and smirked. "Because I just can't."

Lilith was now giving Zim a very worried look. "You're really weird, anyone ever told you that?"

Zim was going to answer, but she continued anyway. "Look, we've barley known each other more then a day. I mean, I like you and all, just not in that way. Ok?"

Zim felt strangely empty, like the time he had been told by Tak that his mission was a lie. For a fleeting moment, high in his ship, looking at the panic in Tak's eyes, he had believed her. His mind had slotted it all into space; everything seemed to be perfectly explained. But a second later he had shaken it off as a lie in a poor attempt to get him to drop his guard.

But this was different, there was no lie here. He didn't even know why he was feeling like this, he had never needed anyone before, so why did he care so much that this human wasn't rushing to his side? He didn't even know what to do if she had accepted this apparent crush he supposedly had on her.

Slowly he scowled as he realised that while he, by all rights, should walk off and forget this human's very existence, was compelled by something inside him to sit and stay, if only to keep close to her. The thought sickened his mind, but also lessened the hole inside him.

Right there, he hated everything and anything he could think of to blame for such conflicting behaviour.

Lilith leaned back into her chair and tried to sound sincere. "Look, let's just get to know each other first, ok? So…where are you from?"

Zim narrowed his eyes. "Not here."

The human smiled slightly. "Oh? Are you from, like, abroad, or something?"

Zim allowed a cunning grin. "Yea, something like that."

Lilith leaned back in her chair and looked up at the dirty ceiling. "Yea, I've been abroad a few times with my mom and dad's money. They didn't actually come along, of course. Bastards."

Zim raised an antenna in confusion. Lilith saw his look and sighed. "My mom and dad are rich, really rich. My dad's company is a rival of Membrane labs and my mom works abroad all the time. I hardly ever see them."

"Oh," Zim replied, trying to hear his own sincerity.

Lilith continued without looking at Zim. "And I was an only child. I hate them so much," She looked up and grinned wickedly. "But at least I get to access the trust fund they set up for me."

Zim couldn't help but grin at the way the human had said that. "So that's how you afford it."

She laughed. "Yea, I wonder what they'd do if they found out. But, then again, they'd have to pay attention to me first."

She turned back to Zim. "So, what country are you from? I might have visited it."

Zim stalled, "Err…"

The talk was interrupted as a waitress placed two plates of waffles and two cups of coffee on the table, then smiled once and walked off. Zim thanked his lucky stars and immediately stuffed his mouth full of waffle so he wouldn't have to answer the question.

The moment she finished eating, as Zim had finished slightly before her, she looked around suspiciously. Zim watched with a lazy interest, he was still mad with himself about how he was not destroying the human for rejecting him.

Lilith lent forward onto the table with a daring look on her face. "Do you really want to pay for this?"

Zim narrowed his eyes, "Paying is normal in any culture."

Lilith rolled her eyes. "Yea well, so is not paying."

Zim was about to say it was not normal, but Lilith grinned and grabbed his hand. Immediately she was out of her seat, dragging a slightly shocked Zim behind her at full speed. The Irken quickly caught on and was soon a step ahead of her as they ran full speed down the street. In the background they could hear an angry shop owner shout insults at them.

But Zim didn't care; he was guiltily enjoying the fact that Lilith was holding his hand.

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Well. This is a pile of sweaty rubbish. It took ages to write and it was done like, a day at a time, with a little sentence added each time.

I hate it when that happens. Anyway, now I got rid of the main problem (the crush) I can speed up the timeline a bit. Is this the end of Zim and Lilith romance? Honestly, on a deep and emo level, yes. But on a drugged up mindless 'I don't know what I'm doing' state, nope.

BTW people, Lilith and Zim have NOT slept together. So don't jump to conclusions with the beginning of this.

Anyways, I hope you guys like Lilith. I'm desperately trying to make her a good character (not a good as in good person, just good as in well designed.) I'm ignoring the Mary-sue rule of 'All Mary-sues have a sad and hard life background' thing because every OC character here has a hard life background. Well…maybe not every…but still. I'm also NOT doing the one thing I noticed appeared an awful lot in drug-fics on this site, making the junkie into some desperate prostitute. Some of you may be alarmed but just because you're a junkie doesn't automatically make you a hooker! Junkie's would rather steal their money then sell themselves.

That's a fact don't' cha know. It may be different in da USA though…BAH, culture shock!

Sly joke, "Look, we've barley known each other more then a day." All Mary-sues seem to get their man (or woman) on the first day.

What I've got planned will be...good. Exciting. A brand new take on how people make Zim act after doing certain things. Well, I hope it is anyway.

R&R, cos you have da power!