Invader Sideos moaned and rubs his hurting eyes once more. He then looks at you ands shouts: GOD MY EYES HURT! I'm gonna have a few cameos here about. HOLY JESUS-GANDIE OFFSPRING! Its chapter 10 already! This was meant to end next chapter! Hum…Looks like I'm gonna have to ride this thing out to its full conclusion.
So yea, here's some filler chapter goodness that we all know you laaaave inside.
Oh, and prepare for the weirdest x-mass gathering you'll ever see. It's weird! Anyways...err...yea. I'm gonna write this...yup. Right now. Man I could do with some alcohol...wait. Did I just type that? CHRIST! OK. Yup. I wonder if I can fill up a whole A/N with just Yup's and Ok's. Yup.
Yup. Ok.
Written to...erm...System of a Down, DragonForce, some Iggy Pop, some other stuff. My heart hurts. Ow...
I don't own Zim...and any reference to Trainspotting is TOTALLY and UTTERLY coincidental. It sure is. Yup...ok.
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"I can't believe I'm doing this," Zim muttered as he stood shivering slightly in the cold snow. His squeedlyspooch was churning and his arms and shoulders itched horribly. But he resisted the urge to scratch, he knew it wouldn't help.
Around him the world was enjoying a picturesque Christmas day. As he had walked up to the house he was currently standing in front of he had passed other houses filled with humans surrounded by their offspring and parents.
How sickening. The humans had adorned there houses in ugly decorations and little flashing bulbs. Despite the horrid evil Santa Zim had created the humans still plastered his image around their pathetic shelters every Christmas. He often felt like ripping them down and burning them. At least Dib's house wasn't that bad, but then again Dib's family weren't big fans of Christmas.
Zim hated Christmas. He had hated all six of them he had been forced by duty to endure, especially this one. Up until the third one he had tried each year to destroy the earth, and strangely it had only been on the Christmases he had ever come truly close. On his second Christmas he had tried to capture and control the Santa-demon to use it to destroy earth. That had failed when it turned on him and he and Dib had been forced to team up and get rid of it. The Christmas after, he had tried to lure the demon back and get off the planet so it would just run about destroying things. That also failed thanks to Dib.
Zim growled, these memories made him wonder why on Irk he was standing outside the boy's house right now.
He could hear people moving around inside. Zim suddenly felt really uncomfortable. He realised that he had not only not seen Dib in weeks, but he had run off on him after the boy had offered his help. He wondered exactly how Dib would react to what Zim was about to ask him. He would help of course, it was in Dib's nature to, but it might take a bit of persuasion.
Zim narrowed his eyes and steeled himself as he heard the sound of someone approaching the door. "This is not going to be easy."
The door opened and Zim automatically launched into his pre-prepared speech, looking at his feet as he did. "Dib, I know that what I did was wrong. I don't expect you to forgive me, I only ask for your assistance in helping me stop this terrible affliction that has...err...afflicted me." He looked forward, expecting Dib's reply to be something rather angry and harsh. However, it wasn't Dib who was standing before him, in fact, Zim had absolutely no idea who it was.
The boy couldn't have been older then fifteen. He had long black hair that was tied back in a small pony tail. He was wearing a black jacket and tight dark green pants with large black boots. He also had a t-shirt with an upside down cross and he was wearing dark eyeliner. On his ears were several piercings. The boy had dark red eyes and an evil smile that Zim envied. Oddly enough he also had a pair of short horns poking up from his forehead.
The boy narrowed one eye at the junkie. "Who are you?"
Zim was going to ask the same thing, but a scream from inside the house shifted his attention.
"MASTER!" This was followed by an ear splitting scream and something green shot out from behind the evil looking child and into Zim's face. Zim fell back onto the floor as a pair of powerful robot arms gripped his head and squeezed with such force he could almost hear his skull crack.
He gripped the robot and, with some considerable force, threw it from him. He sat up and the green dog flew onto him again, but this time hugged him with less strength.
Zim looked down at his blissfully happy robot slave and patted his head. "Ok Gir, I'm happy to see you too."
Gir was in his dirty green dog disguise, but it didn't stop tears of joy flooding from the robot's eyes. Zim often wondered how the robot could do that, but then again, who was he to try and pick apart a superior Sir unit?
The boy chuckled, "So that's who you belong to. You must be Zim then?"
Zim looked up at the child and narrowed his eyes, "How do you know that?"
The boy smiled, "Cos that little robot-thing won't stop going on about you."
Zim however didn't seemed to have heard this. "HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ZIM!?"
The boy raised an eyebrow in confusion at the Irken, "O...k," he turned around and shouted into the house, "Gaz!"
There was a shout from the living room of the house as she yelled something about a game, the kid shouted that the Zim guy was at the door and a few seconds later she arrived in the doorway.
She turned to the kid, "Ok, Pepito, you can get lost now, go play with your little friend."
The Pepito kid snorted at the insult and walked back into the house. Gaz turned to look at Zim as he picked himself off the floor. Gir seemed to be refusing to let go of him and was hugging the Irken's leg tightly.
"So," She stated coldly, "what are you doing here? Come to steal some money to feed your habit?"
Zim snarled. "Actually I've decided that I should come off aswermitus."
Gaz raised an eyebrow and rather sarcastically said, "Really?"
The junkie nodded. "Yes really. But I need assistance."
Gaz smirked. "You need our help."
The Irken narrowed his eyes and said nothing. He couldn't admit to needing help, no Irken would ever admit to needing help from a lower life form. Assistance, however, was different.
Gaz stepped aside and mumbled "Fine," allowing Zim, with Gir still attached to his leg, to walk into the house. Zim walked into the front room, which lead directly to the living room. He looked over all the sights that were by now so very familiar. The same sky blue walls, the red couch, the large screen TV, the masses of Professor Membrane memorabilia. Almost nothing in Dib's house had changed, only the pictures on the mantle place showing the ageing children. As Zim walked into the house he noticed there were no Christmas decorations anywhere, not even a Christmas tree.
Gaz walked past him and growled something about following her into the kitchen. Gir stopped hugging his master's leg and hopped past Gaz shouting something about coffee and peanuts. Zim followed slowly, his eyes drawn to the couch where the spooky Pepito child was sitting next another kid while watching some Christmas movie. However, all Zim could see of the other child was the back of his head, which was covered in slightly messy black hair.
Zim shrugged and followed Gaz into the kitchen. He took a seat at the table, thankful for something to sit down on and lazily watched as Gir threw a bunch of various sauces into a cup of hot water. Gaz sat down to the left of him, also watching the insane robot attempt to make cups of coffee.
She looked at Zim, who did not look at her, and observed him for a moment, as if looking for any proof of his addiction.
Suddenly she said, "Don't mind Pepito, he's just my annoying little cousin. Him, Uncle Juan and Aunt Honey come over every Christmas and make us celebrate it with them, and they always bring that little Todd kid. It's so annoying."
Zim just nodded lazily. He really needed to talk to Dib and Dib only; this was turning out to be rather a big mistake. If he left now he could still make it to the hotel by eleven...
"No!" He pounded his fist on the table causing Gaz to jump slightly and Gir to turn around. "I'm not going back there!"
Gaz raised an eyebrow at him, "Going back where?"
Zim quickly caught himself, "Oh, err, my house. Nope. Not going back, too many reminders of what I'm trying to destroy. It'd be like going to a mall."
Gaz replied with a slow "uh-huh" before looking up. Zim turned around to see a smiling human male. He had neatly cut blond hair and a pair of glasses. His suit was a black, pinstripe business suit with matching pants and had a hint of dark red about it. On his feet was a pair of simple black shoes. However, it was the human's eyes which Zim looked at the most. They where dark, icy blue and in total contrast with his suit, making them stand out like two diamonds. The man looked at Zim, narrowing his eyes slightly and Zim felt a cold chill run down his spine. This human was creepy; there was a…something about him that seemed implacably evil.
"Well," His voice sounded normal, but Zim could still feel the malevolence pouring off this being. "Who's your friend, Gaz?"
Gaz's eyes narrowed in annoyance. She didn't seem to be affected by the darkness that this human radiated. "Uncle Juan, this is Zim, Dib's friend."
"Oh, well in that case. Please allow me to introduce myself. My name's Juan Satan."
Zim smiled nervously. "Err…Hi."
The human put a hand to his chin and inspected Zim again. The Irken could almost feel those eyes look deep into his mind. If he had a soul, he was sure that this person could see it.
Slowly the man began to smile. "Another victim of my latest attempt to spoil Christmas it seems. I hope you enjoyed the product, I spent weeks getting the chemicals just right." And he laughed and walked off.
Gaz got up and Zim did the same. Gir seemed to be now bathing in the horrible looking mixture he had made in the kitchen sink.
Gaz looked at Zim. "Ignore him; he's just happy that everything's been going so smoothly at his work lately. Come on, let's get the idiot."
As they walked out of the room and towards the stairs Pepito looked at them from where he was sitting, his friend, apparently called Todd, looked from him to the Irken and back again as Pepito spoke. "Hey, are you gonna get the waste- I mean Dib out of his room?"
Gaz just growled at him and Zim grinned evilly at the kid next to Pepito. Todd's, already large eyes, widened in fear and he ducked below the couch making a small "squee" sound as he did. Zim felt slightly better; scaring people always made him feel better.
As they walked up the stairs together the sound of music began to grow. By the time they were in front of Dib's room, marked by its many stickers saying things like 'The truth is out there,' and 'I see past them,' the music was pounding through the floor.
Gaz growled, "Those better not be MY Fury-At-The-System CD's!" She turned to a rather un-amused looking Zim. "He hasn't left his room in weeks. I think he's being a bit melodramatic."
She turned back to the door and kicked it with some force. "DIB!" she shouted above the noise, "Someone's here to see you."
The music lowered in volume and Dib wearily called out "Who?"
Zim grinned and leaned against the wall, just next to the door. "Take a guess, stink-beast."
The music lowered again and there was a hurried shuffling and crashing as Dib moved through what sounded like piles of rubbish. However, Dib did not open the door; instead Zim could hear him pause just as he got to it. "How can I be sure it's really him, how do I know you're not just trying to trick me?"
Zim rolled his eyes, "Fine. If you really want me to go I'll go."
"No! Wait..." Dib slowly opened his door, enough for his dark brown eyes to look round and spot the sickly green Irken leaning against the wall.
Zim sneered and sarcastically waved a hand. "Hi, Dibby."
Dib glared as Gaz smiled nastily at the comment. Dib slowly came out and stood in the doorway. He was a tall, thin seventeen year old who could easily pass for eighteen, maybe even nineteen. His black scythed hair was slightly messy. He wasn't wearing his trench coat, but he did have his stoic faced t-shirt and his long, sky blue arm warmers on. He wore black pants that where tucked into a pair of faintly worn out looking combat boots. His clothes looked messy and slightly faded. He also had small dark rings under his eyes, which were behind a pair of black rimmed glasses. Dib looked at Zim, noting the Irken's sickly green skin and unhealthy skinny frame.
He didn't seem very happy. "So, what are you doing here?"
Zim could feel the coldness in Dib's words; he decided to counter, slipping back into the old habit of arguments between the two. "I came for your, probably useless, assistance in getting rid of this addiction."
"HA!" Dib stepped forward, using his height over Zim to his advantage and glared down at him. "You'll just run off back to your precious needles again like last time. I should've known trying to trust and help you was a stupid idea."
Zim growled back. A violent, withdrawal fuelled look entered his eyes. "You can't force someone off something like this. My problem is NOTHING like yours was. I'm asking nicely if you're still willing to aid me, Dib. I would appreciate the help, but I can do this without you. I am ZIM after all."
Dib sneered. "No you can't, that's why you came to me. You knew you'd fail at it just like you fail at everything else you try. Like having friends for example."
Zim snapped. He leapt onto Dib, his hands wrapping around the boy's neck. The two quickly fell to the floor where Zim continued to throttle the human.
However, Dib also wrapped his hands around Zim's thin neck and began squeezing. The two could have easily strangled each other there and then if it wasn't for Gaz grabbing Zim's antenna and yanking him upwards.
The Irken screamed in pain as he was dragged by a furious Gaz to the far end of the corridor and thrown in a room. The room consisted of a single bed, a dresser, and a window. By the way the room was half white half blue it was obvious the decorating in there had not been completed. The light was not turned on, so the only the light from the corridor shone in.
Zim tried to get up, but found it almost impossible. The outburst of energy had already worn him out. Dib came to the doorway rubbing his neck and grimacing at Gaz. She just pointed to the Irken who was panting and trying to haul himself onto the bed.
Zim looked at Dib, casting his own scowl as he did.
Zim watched as something seemed to come over Dib; his scowl disappeared and turned to something akin to pity, hate and disgust. Zim glared, he hated that look. He and the other residents of the Thunders Hotel would get that look from people when walking down the streets, but Zim had never cared because he knew the onlookers were inferior, stupid mindless apes waiting to be destroyed.
But when it came from Dib it meant something. Zim looked away; he couldn't stand seeing that look anymore.
Dib walked into the doorway. "Do you really want to beat this thing?"
Zim didn't look up. "Yes."
Dib placed his hand on the door. "And you promise not to run out on me again, because if you do..."
The Irken snapped his head up and growled at Dib, "Zim is not promising anything. Why do you think I came here? I need someone to hold me back."
The human grinned. "Alright Zim, I'll help." And in one swift movement he grabbed the door knob and slammed it shut.
Zim ran up to the door and tried to re-open it, but as he got there he heard the lock click and he knew there was no getting out of the room.
He smashed his fists on the door. "DIB! Let me out NOW!"
Dib's voice came through the door. It was serious, but Zim could hear him laughing at the same time. "If you stay in there then you won't be able to get to any drugs, will you? I'll be back in an hour. I've got presents to open."
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WOW! NOTHING that I planned for this chapter ACTUALLY HAPPENED!
This could mean a very short next chapter. But I could also combine it with the epologue I was going to make...humm...Yea. Ok. Anyways, there's your standard Squee and Pepito cameos. I've always loved the idea that the Membranes are related to the Diablo's. It kinda helps link everything together in a nice warm fuzzy family way.
So, yea. You can sleep easy knowing the next chapter is gonna be filled with Zim-withdrawal HELL, MUHAHAHAH!
On a sly, mean note, this chapter goes up the same day that Ketteh and Neo have updated their fics (is their really two of them?) so I'm sneekily, in my unique 'asshole-esk' kinda way, am drawing some attention away from em. With any luck anyway.
Not that I have anything against em, but its just that I hate em. I hate em very much. They're obessivly promotive (HA! Bet you thought I was gonna complain about the queer gayness!). Let me explain. They write reeeaaally emo and gay ZADR and DADR (thats D for Dwiky) fics, non of which contain any other charicter 'cept the ones mentioned in the pairing (that annoys me only a little, but only because of the emo-ness), then they mass promote them by making hundreds (well, maybe not hundreds but you get the idea) of Dev-art pics about them.
Media whores at their worst. Don't you just hate this capatilist sociaty in which we live?
Bah, just ignore me. I come from an extremly working class (and damn proud of it!) background. Hating the system and all that succeed in using it is in my blood.
Anyways, R&R for this chapter filled with almost nothing. In fact, I would understand completely if most of you decided not to review this chapter, I mean, it really is quite uneventful.