Chapter Five

Alone

Paul was a man of pride, and since he truly believed he didn't do anything wrong, he didn't call Jared that night or the following day. When he noticed Jared wasn't in his classes by the third day, he started to worry. Sure, they had fought, but with college applications going out, he found it hard to believe that this was all because of him. If that wasn't enough to alarm him, on the fourth night of not talking to his best friend, Jackie showed up at Paul's place with a plate of food. She told Paul that Jared had not been feeling well, that he caught that bug that had been going around. Paul accepted the answer, but it still didn't explain why Jared was avoiding his calls. Hell, when they were eight and had the chicken pox, they used their walkie-talkies to stay in touch after they had been banished to their rooms. By the tenth night, Paul was positive something was wrong.

"Jare…" Paul breathed into the phone, tired of talking to Jared's answering machine. "I tried to see you yesterday. Your mom said you were still sick and wouldn't let me in… What's going on, dude? I know you better than that. Look… if this is about…" He pinched the bridge of his nose, at war with his pride and own fears. "I'm sorry, Jare. We can talk about it, okay? We can… I don't know, we can figure something out… just please call me." He hung up before he could practically beg Jared to come over. With this new element in their relationship, it was hard, but it was harder not having his best friend around. For the first time in years, Paul felt… alone. On top of not seeing Jared, Paul was pretty sure he was getting sick too. He was always hot, even with all the windows open. And his body ached. It felt like he was being stretched at either end, and he might have been. His long legs no longer fit on his bed, hanging over the edge no matter how high up he moved. Then there was the weird muscle gain. Sure, he had been spending longer hours in the gym without Jared around, but this was insane.

Lighting a cigarette, Paul looked out over his yard. It was quiet here when he was alone. Normally, Paul wouldn't mind the isolation, but Jared's words from a few weeks prior rang in his mind. He now understood what Jared meant when he said that it felt like everyone knew something they didn't. Only now, Jared seemed to be on the other side of the fence. Glancing at his phone, Paul flicked the cigarette into the damp grass and bounced down off the porch. He didn't want to go to school, but he knew it was his only chance to actually talk to Jared – not that he'd been back yet. Besides, it served as a distraction. Over the last week, Paul had tried to fall back on Stacy, but she dumped him for not calling her for a week – like he cared. He just needed a way to get his brain to shut up.

Deciding to skip homeroom, Paul headed straight to the gym. His first class was physical education, which Paul didn't mind. Physical outlets were always a better distraction than mental ones. The boy's baseball team practiced most mornings, so Paul wasn't surprised to find most of them exiting the locker rooms as he arrived. What did surprise him however, was the familiar figure standing outside of the showers, a towel hanging low on his waste as he ran another through his hair… his much shorter hair.

"Jared?" Paul questioned, brows furrowed. He saw Jared's form tense before his eyes slowly slid to meet Paul's he held his best friend's gaze for a moment, almost as if searching for something before frowning and looking away. "What the fuck, dude? Your mom said you were sick." Paul hissed, eyes moving over Jared's body. He certainly didn't look sick. He looked like he had been pumping himself full of steroids the last few weeks to go with his new haircut. "Is that- is that a fucking tattoo?"

"I don't want to talk, Paul." Jared's voice was nearly emotionless as he turned his back to Paul, slipping on some shorts as he pushed the towel out of the way. "We'll talk soon, but now's not a good time." His voice sounded strained now – like he wasn't saying everything he wanted to.

"I left you like six messages." Paul felt heat flush over his body as Jared refused to look at him. "Is this because of me? Because of that stupid fight?"

Jared paused before slowly dragging his eyes back to Paul. They were nearly the same height, which meant Jared had grown even more over the last ten days. "It's not about that, Paul. It's… complicated. You'll know everything soon, but I can't tell you anything right now." Jared's face scrunched before falling. "And about the fight… just forget it. Forget everything."

"What do you mean forget everyth-"

"Forget us, Paul." Jared's words would have been cold, but when he met Paul's gaze again, it was easy to see the torment behind his now hardened eyes. "Whatever it was… it's no good for us anymore."

Paul licked his lips as he gathered himself. It hurt to hear Jared say that – especially when Paul had just begun to admit to himself that he was falling in love with his best friend. But that didn't matter – Jared would never know. All Paul knew was that he couldn't lose him. "So that's it?" Paul nearly winced at the hoarse tone his voice took on. "We can't even be friends anymore? That whole plan to move off of the rez and go to college away from this shithole – that was in place a long time before we… before we were anything more than friends." He nearly deflated at the thought. He was angry – probably angrier than he had been in a long time, but the hurt far outweighed the rage.

"I can't leave the reservation." Jared's voice was quiet, nearly a whisper as he looked to his feet. He mumbled something – something Paul didn't quite catch before looking back up at him. "I wish… I wish we could, Paul. I wish things were as simple as they were a few weeks ago. I mean, shit, they weren't simple, but they were simpler." He took a small step in Paul's direction, his shoulders shaking gently. "Things can't go back to the way they were, Paul. It'll just hurt more, but I need you to know… No matter how it seems, I really did-"

"Jared." A stern, nearly booming voice cut off whatever Jared was going to say. Paul watched as Jared's soft face turned to stone before he stood a little straighter. Looking over his shoulder, Paul frowned at Sam Uley who stood in the doorway to the locker room. "Let's go."

Jared didn't look at Paul as he pushed past him to get to Sam. That hurt more than Paul was willing to admit. "You're friends with Sam Uley now?" It didn't escape Paul's notice the way Sam lightly shook his head no in Jared's direction before stepping aside to let him through. Without a word, Sam's hard eyes landed on Paul, his gaze unwavering and intense before exiting behind Jared, leaving Paul all alone once again.

The rest of the day seemed like a dream. Paul remembered going to his classes, he remembered Jared sitting next to him in biology without so much as a glance, and he remembered getting detention for walking out of biology without permission minutes later… but it was like none of it was actually happening. When Paul finally made it home, he was surprised to find Jackie Cameron sitting on his front steps, a covered plate placed neatly in her lap. Before he could even reach her, he noticed her pitying smile.

"I heard what happened, sweetie." She cooed as she stood, placing the plate on a nearby chair.

"Well that makes one of us, because I have no idea what the fuck is happening anymore!" Paul growled out, his shoulders shaking gently. As fear flashed across Jackie's face, Paul took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Mama Jackie." He gave her the best smile he could muster, which felt more like a grimace. "I just… I don't understand." He breathed deeply as her face softened.

"I know, dear. I promise that this isn't forever." Her words were sweet, but Paul couldn't help but notice the way she kept her distance – like she was afraid of him.

"You know, don't you? You know what's going on with Jared and Sam, and you won't tell me." He asked through clenched teeth.

"I know about a lot of things, Paul." Her pointed gaze sent a shockwave through his system, finally stilling the tremors in his hands. She couldn't possibly mean… "Jared is my son, and you are practically my son. You two aren't as inconspicuous as you thought."

Paul's breath caught. How? When? "Is that why?" He asked, tears pricking his eyes at the thought. Did Jackie make Jared stop talking to him? Did she hate him now that she knew he was… - he couldn't even think it. "Did you tell him to stay away from me because you're angry about it?"

"No…" She cooed gently, taking a tentative step forward to place a hand on his arm, but still keeping a careful distance. "No, Paul, sweetie. I have nothing to do with that. And I'm not angry." She clarified, ducking her head to catch his downcast gaze. "I don't fully understand it, but it's not for me to understand." She took a deep breath through her nose before stepping back to her previous position. "Things are complicated right now, Paul. And they have the potential to become even more complicated down the line, but I want you to know that nothing you do will ever make me love you less."

"Why does everyone keep saying it's complicated!?" He nearly cried, the tremors returning with a vengeance. "I'm sick of people talking behind my back! I'm sick of being treated like I'm not wanted anywhere – even by my own fucking family! The one person that wasn't like them – the one fucking person that saw any value in me won't even talk to me anymore and no one will even tell me why!" He wanted to say more, but his voice grew shaky as Jackie took one step back, and then two.

It felt like his blood was boiling in his veins – like every atom in his body was speeding up simultaneously. It felt like standing in fire with cement around his ankles. A deep growl echoed in Paul's mind, but he didn't have enough sense at the moment to understand that it was coming from him. As Jackie reached the porch, Paul's anger reached a boiling point. The pain was instant, and gone just as quick. Panic ripped through Paul as everything seemed to change around him. His vision was sharper, and he could smell Jackie's fear. He was growling – he realized with a start. Before Paul could dwell on the thought, he was tackled from the side, his body hitting the ground with a near thunderous boom.

There was no logic or reason anymore, only pure instinct as Paul turned his head, grabbing a mouthful of brown fur. The wolf yelped as it jumped up, standing between Paul and Jackie. 'It's me, Paul!' Jared's voice echoed within Paul's mind.

Paul whimpered as he looked around, his heart racing. What was happening to him? Why was he a fucking wolf!? 'Jared?' Paul thought, another whine sliding past his lips.

'It's going to be okay, Paul.' Another, unfamiliar voice joined the first. 'It's me, Sam.'

'Jared?' Paul looked to the big brown wolf who lowered himself to the ground, trying everything he could to not look threatening. The only reason Paul knew that was what he was doing was because he could hear it. 'What's happening? Why can I hear you in my mind? Why am I a wolf?' Paul's ears flattened against his head as Jared crept forward, nearly crawling.

'He's dangerous, Jared!' Sam's warning caused a growl to bubble in Paul's chest. He could see that Sam was running beside the beach, which meant he would be there soon.

'He won't hurt me, Sam.' Jared chastised as he reached Paul. Standing slowly, he rubbed his head against Paul's, licking his muzzle as he whimpered. 'It's okay, Paul. It's going to be okay…'

It ended up taking two hours for Paul to calm down enough to phase back, and another hour after that for Sam to explain that all the legends were true. After the first twenty minutes, Jared went to 'patrol' which left Paul sitting alone with Sam in his tiny kitchen. Luckily, Emily had already gone to bed. The last thing Paul wanted was another person watching him like he would explode at any minute. Then again, he might.

"So Jackie knew?" Paul asked, wincing as the tattoo gun moved over his arm. Apparently, this was the pack's symbol. It let the people of the reservation know who they were, and that they were there to protect the tribe.

"The elders know everything – at least we try to." Sam explained, his hardened face softening some. Sam's father had died the year prior, which meant that Sam was an elder too. Paul's father would have been, but since he died, that left Holly on the council, not that she was around enough to actually know that. "The more we know, the more we can protect people." He explained, though it sounded like the words weighed on him. Sam wasn't much older than Jared or Paul, but he had the safety of the entire tribe on his shoulders.

"Sam… you said you can alpha order us, right? And even if we wanted to disobey, we couldn't." The machine paused as Sam's questioning eyes moved to Paul's face. "Could you… could you alpha order me to not think of anything that happened before the phase while I'm a wolf?"

The legends were something Paul had grown up hearing. Hell, there was still a whole class for it in middle school, but one new bit of information came from Sam himself. Imprints. It was why Jared had pulled back – it was why he said that it would only hurt them in the long run. Even if there was a slight chance, they had to be careful. What if they had continued down the path they were on and one of them was to imprint? Sure, it was supposed to be rare, but now that they shared their minds with Sam, their secret wouldn't be kept anymore. It wasn't something that Paul wanted to think about at length. He would have his best friend back… and that would have to be enough.

"If that's what you want, Paul." Sam leaned back in his chair, the tattoo on Paul's bicep already healed. "Paul, as your alpha, I order you to never think of anything before your first phase while you're in your wolf form." The air around Paul seemed to tingle before settling in his skin. Sam watched him for a long moment, much like he had before any of this happened. "Paul… I don't want to pry, but you should know that this pack… we're family. There will be times that our lives will depend on each other. I will never judge you." Paul shouldn't have been surprised that Sam also seemed to know. After all, he was part of the council, and he had nearly two weeks to poke around inside Jared's mind. At the very least, his words seemed sincere. "You don't have to talk to me about it, but if you ever want to… we're brothers. I won't think any differently of you." He didn't wait for an answer, slapping Paul on the shoulder once before standing to clean up.

Sam headed to bed since he was going to take the shift after Jared, but invited Paul to stay as long as he liked. Paul felt out of place in the unfamiliar home, so chose to spend the night sitting on the stairs of Sam's porch instead. Normally, it would seem like a quiet night, but thanks to Paul's new enhanced senses, he could hear every little bug in a mile radius. It would have been deafening if he hadn't learned to tune out annoying noises a long time ago. His eyes stared into the darkness of the forest, which was practically as clear as it was during the day thanks to his new wolf vision. But he didn't really see any of it. He was too busy thinking about everything he had just learned. He thought about imprints and the fact that every time his anger got the best of him, he would turn into a giant wolf. He thought about the fact that the Cullen's were vampires, and that thanks to this new gift, he would never leave the reservation. He thought mostly about Jared. About how different things would have been for them if not for this stupid gene. By the time he had circled back around to imprinting, the sun was beginning to rise, and Jared was trotting out of the woods in nothing but a pair of cut-offs.

"Did you get any sleep?" He asked with a small smile, looking pretty rundown himself. He would still have a full day at school. Paul on the other hand was exhaled from most human interaction until his temper leveled out. Knowing Paul, that could take a while.

Paul shrugged as Jared sat beside him. "I forgot." He offered simply. It would do Jared no good to know that he hadn't gotten a decent night sleep in weeks.

"Look man…" Jared sighed, turning his gaze to Paul. "Are we… are we okay?"

Paul snorted, punching Jared in the shoulder as the sounds of Emily moving in the kitchen reached his ears. "Of course we are, Cameron. You're not getting rid of me that easily." He smirked as Jared's familiar smile lit up his face. Maybe if Paul pretended long enough, he would start to believe that friendship would be enough.

AN: I know this chapter was a little all over the place, but I really wanted to get the beginnings of the pack established so I could get into the bulk of the story. The chapters thus far have been more or less establishing chapters.

Special thanks to my readers/reviewers!

Maxsmomma – I'm so glad you're getting that vibe! It's rare for me to write characters that lure me in. It's hard for me to even walk away from writing them! Every once in a while, I get these characters that just write themselves, and that's totally the case with Paul and Jared. I feel like they're just living their lives and I'm just writing what I see! lol