Disclaimer: I do not receive any profit for my fanfictions, nor do I own Supernatural or Sam and Dean Winchester.

Title: Lose Yourself

Chapter Title: Chapter Eleven

Set After: NEW SET AFTER! I LOVED 'SOMETHING WICKED' SO IT'S AFTER THAT! AMAZING BROTHERLY OVERPROTECTIVE DEAN!

Summary: Dean tried to tell Sam that it wasn't his fault, that he had no part in Jess or their mom dying… Sam didn't believe him. Now the guilt is causing him to go down a road that Dean might not be able to bring him back from. His depression is hitting the brothers fast and hard, and Sam can only be pushed so far before losing himself completely.

Warnings: probably a few typos here and there...

"Wakey, wakey."

Dean opened his eyes slowly, finding himself in a room… a room that looked as if it were one found in a normal, average American home. Damn, what was with these demons and suddenly taking their victims into hominal settings? What ever happened to the caves, or woods, or whatever the else hell they lived in? The older Winchester groaned and looked around, taking in every detail about where he was. Couch, chairs, TV, coffee table… and he wasn't locked up? Wait, what? And where the hell was Sam?

Christina (the psychiatrist, remember?) stepped towards Dean, having been hiding by a shadow in the corner. She had a deadly smirk upon her face as her eyes danced, while her body was covered in a full black outfit. Damn, these demons needed to lay off of all this cliché crap.

Dean looked around carefully. Okay, she wouldn't just leave him unlocked for nothing. There had to be a catch. There had to be something that would kill him if he tried to escape. Or else Christina was just stupid. Because, really, she wouldn't be able to take on Dean by herself. She wasn't strong enough. At least… Dean didn't think so. But one of the Winchester rules was to not underestimate your opponents… Hey, the girl made a lot of money with her shrink job, so she couldn't be stupid. Dean narrowed his eyes and her, and stood up from his place on the couch before taking a step forwards. He then hit something like an invisible force field, and fell back onto the couch. Yup. She was smart.

"Don't worry, honey, your brother's just fine… for now," Christina said, smirking slightly. She walked towards him, stepping just short of the force field. "Really, I couldn't just off him. I wanted you to pay. You know, I saw what you did to my sister. We share a connection. We can see what each other's doing when we're tapped into our demonic powers… Since I watched you kill my little sister, you're going to watch me kill your little brother. Only seems fair."

"You sick bitch," Dean said, glaring at her. It was killing him that he had to sit here, watching her. He had to sit on his ass while God only knew what was happening to his brother. He hated it. He hated just sitting here because of the force field, he hated this bitch for capturing him, he hated himself for not being able to fight the demon, he hated his father for leaving them in a situation like this, and he hated—no, was mad at—Sam for getting himself kidnapped. He just hated it.

"Thanks," Christina said, a satisfied smile upon her face. She slowly started walking around the couch, Dean following her with his eyes. That bitch was gonna pay. He was going to make sure of it. "Would you like to see your brother?"

"That's the fucking stupidest question I have ever heard in my goddamn life," Dean growled, glaring at her. Maybe he could take a leaf out of that hick family's book and torture her to death with a white hot fire poker. Yeah, that sounded fun.

"So I take it that's a yes?" Christina asked, now stopping in front of Dean, having walked a full circle around the couch. At the look Dean gave her she raised her eyebrows, nodding. "Alright. We'll go see him. If you're sure you want to, that is."

Suspicious. Why was she all for letting him see Sam? And what did she mean by 'if you're sure'? Of course he was fucking sure! He had to see if Sam was alright! There was something off about this demon. Well, of course there was. There was something off about all demons. That's why they were called demons. But there was something different about this one. And then it hit Dean. "Someone changed them. My sisters, I mean." That was right. Christina used to be human. And now she was just pissed that Dean killed her little sister. Well, he could understand that... even if he didn't like it.

Christina nodded, looking Dean over. She then closed her eyes and whispered something incoherent to Dean for a couple seconds. She then waved her hand, keeping it pointed at Dean as she opened her eyes. "Walk forward." Dean stared at her like she was crazy. What the hell? "Dude, I said walk forward. Now do it or you don't get to see your brother until I kill him." Dean swallowed hard, looking around. He then stood up and slowly started walking forward, Christina following alongside him, her arm still outstretched. "Good boy. Now, don't try to escape. I'm just moving the force field. That's why you can walk."

"I have to ask you something," Dean said, Christina following behind him. As he tried to take a turn, he ran into the force field, being thrown back a bit. He glared at her and turned the other way. She could at least tell him where to go. Bitch.

"Shoot."

"Were you controlling Sammy's body or was Sammy here the whole time?" Dean asked, swallowing hard. He had seriously thought about grabbing his gun while he was in the Impala. But he hadn't known if it was his brother's body. Besides, without the demon it would've taken longer to find his brother.

"Oh, Sam was here. I just share the same power as Rebecca. We're like shape shifters, but much more powerful. And we're not hideous when in our own form. And we don't shed in a disgusting way." Christina thought for a moment, looking like a blonde caught in the middle of a mall traffic jam. "I guess I'm not much like a shape shifter, am I?" Dean just rolled his eyes.

Soon they were in a room, filled with cabinets displaying knives, along with others displaying guns. There was also an altar in the far end of the room, a giant pentagram painted above it on the wall behind. Plus, there was some normal stuff. A couch, a coat rack, a lamp... God damn these suburban demon hideouts. Sam was sitting in a corner, resting his head against the wall. It was obvious that he had a force field around him, or Dean would've kicked his ass for not getting out sooner and using the weapons that were at his disposal.

"Sam?" Dean asked, walking a few steps forward. He looked over at Christina, who nodded, motioning that he could walk over to him without having anything blocking his path. Dean sighed in relief and walked over to Sam, kneeling down next to him. "Sammy?" Sam opened his eyes, and when they fell on Dean he backed up a bit, looking terrified. What the hell was wrong with him? "Sam, what's wrong? It's just me."

"I put a spell on him."

"Of course you did," Dean said, rolling his eyes. "What the fuck did you do to my brother?" Oh, he was gonna make this bitch die a long, agonizing death.

"I just made it so the person he's closest to looks like the demon he was terrified the most of in his life, that's all." Christina smirked and crossed her arms, watching as Sam's breath caught in his throat, tears of fear coming to his eyes. "Apparently the demon scared him shitless, because he's not even fighting back."

Dean was both happy and angry at those words. She was right. Sam knew better than to just sit back and not fight. He had to fight. Or else he could die. But... he was glad Sam wasn't fighting him. He wouldn't be able to knock Dean out of the ring, but Sam held a pretty mean punch. And Dean tried to avoid getting in the way of those.

"Sam, c'mon, man," Dean said softly, his heart breaking at the fear in Sam's eyes. "You're better than this. You're better than a damn demon's spell. It's Dean. I'm Dean. Your big brother. The jerk. The lady's man. Remember? I gave you your first bottle of beer. Your first condom, too." When he noticed some realization in Sam's eyes, he smiled slightly. Good. But there was more fear than realization, and Sam was still terrified of Dean. Bad. Dean looked over at the demon. "Fix him."

"Honey? I'm a demon. I don't work that way." Christina laughed slightly, shaking her head. "It hurts, doesn't it?" She walked towards the brothers slowly, her eyes dangerous. "Taylor knew it was us, but she acted like she didn't even know Rebecca and myself. Her older sisters. There was so much fear in her eyes. So much hate. You killed my little sister, Dean. So whatever pain I've felt from either of my sisters you're gonna feel from your brother." Christina finally moved her outstretched hand, quickly towards the opposite wall. Immediately Dean was thrown backwards, crashing hard into the wall.

"Stop it," Sam whispered, taking in gasp-y breaths, as though he was finishing up a sob fest. "Please."

"Who is he?" Christina asked curiously, walking over to Sam. She kneeled down in front of him and took his head in her hands, lifting up his chin so their eyes would lock completely. She hoped her touching Sam would fool Dean. She could go in force fields, but they couldn't get out. And she would just love to see Dean run into his again. It amused her.

"He... He's the demon... that killed you..." Sam said softly, looking over at Dean. "I know I should fight him... protect you... but I can't... I don't know why... I can't..."

"And who am I?" Christina asked, smirking evilly as she looked over at Dean, who was slowly standing up, looking in pain.

Sam looked back at Christina. He smiled slightly. "What do you mean? You're Jess."

"Oh, damnit," Dean said, shaking his head. Not good. He didn't trust Dean and he'd do anything for Christina. Great. This was exactly how he planned his evening. Fight with Sam, go to the shrink, get kidnapped by the shrink, have Sam hate him and love a demon. Why couldn't this demon just be an easy kill? Why couldn't she had been attacked by something weak? After seeing Sammy slice up his own arm the week before he really wasn't in the mood for PMSing evil bitches right now.

Christina knelt down in front of Sam, unbuttoning his shirt slowly. She looked at the symbol on his torso, smirking evilly. "Sammy, honey, you would do anything for me, right?"

Sam looked at Christina curiously, then nodded. "Of course. What is it, Jess? What do you want me to do?"

Christina put her hand on the symbol, closing her eyes. The symbol started to glow red, and Sam closed his eyes in pain. Everything came back to him. Dean, Christina, Rebecca, Taylor... It all made sense again. And he tried to fight the woman off, but... he couldn't. He couldn't move. His head snapped back and Christina pulled her hand back a bit, his chest going with it. It was like they were connected.

Dean's eyes went wide, in fear and anger. "GET THE FUCK OFF OF HIM!" He tried to ram through the force field, but instead was thrown back into the wall after his feeble attempt. No way. She couldn't do this to him. She couldn't make him watch his brother die while he had no way to stop it. She couldn't do this to him. It was sick and twisted! But... wait. Hadn't Sam said that in his vision he had been stabbed with a coat hanger? There was a coat hanger nearby, but unless Dean had really missed something, he hadn't been stabbed yet. Sammy wasn't going to die. Not yet and not ever. Well, not until he was old, at least. Dean would make sure of that.

Christina withdrew her hand from Sam's torso slowly, opening her eyes. She then stepped back, out of Sam's force field. The young woman smirked slightly and nodded. "Good Sam." As Dean looked, he found that the symbol was gone. What the hell? "It was all your fault, you know that, right?"

Sam swallowed hard, shaking his head. His eyes were now open and he was looking at Christina. "No. It wasn't. Jess was, but the rest wasn't. Mom just tried to protect me. Dad was always just worried because demons liked the way I tasted. And Dean? He's my older brother. He's supposed to worry and look out for me. It's in his job description. Or so he says. I could've told Jess--I should've told Jess--but nothing else was my fault."

"Good for you, Sammy," Dean said, smiling slightly. It was great to hear his little brother say that. After Sam had been repeating that 'everything was his fault' for the last few weeks it was great to hear him say the opposite. Dean was proud of his little brother. What happened next caught him off guard.

Christina glared at Sam, stepping forward slowly. Her eyes turned blue as she knelt down in front of him. "I said: it was all your fault, you know that, right?"

Sam's eyes suddenly turned blue, and he nodded slowly. His next words were in monotone, and he seemed completely out of it. Like he wasn't in control. "Yeah. I know. Everything was my fault."

"Damnit," Dean muttered.

Haley: Hey guys! Sorry for the long, long, long wait! But I'm in class and I gotta go! Love ya'll!

Sam: Hey guys! Bye guys!

Dean: Yeah, whatever.

Haley: For all of those who are watching the newer SN episodes (like not England and those European people) tell me how much you loved 'Something Wicked' and big brother Dean and I'll tell you how much I loved it in a review reply! Gotta go! Love ya'll! Review please! Ciao!