Home for the Holidays

Chapter 5

Hannah and Christine were following Tom through the halls of the hospital. He was walking quickly and they couldn't see past him. Even in the elevator, it was like he was directing someone and they couldn't see what was happening, or at least Hannah couldn't. Christine was all knowing.

"Mom, it looks like Tom has his hands on someone's shoulders but I can't see who?"

"He's an odd one to figure out. Has been for years."

"You won't tell me?"

"Nope. Just watch."

They were back in the hospital room and Mallory was sitting next to Mike on the bed. He was holding a sleeping Tommy. There were tears in his eyes but he was focused on the baby and was stroking his cheek with his finger. Mallory was keeping an eye on the monitors. She had a worried look on her face.

"What's happening?"

"Notice how worried Mallory is? Your dad's heart is slowing down and his blood pressure is dropping."

"Can't they do something?"

"No. He's dying, Hannah. And she knows it. She doesn't have the heart to take Tommy away from him. Tommy is why he's holding on. He may very well die, holding his son."

"Where's Tom? Where am I?"

"Tom is on his way but you needed to see what was going on in here first."

"If I'm coming back, will I get there in time? And will it stop him from dying?"

"Possibly. But let's just watch. He has something more to say, because he also knows what is coming."

"Mal, I know you're angry at Hannah right now. Please do not withhold the kids from her when I die. Try not to blame her. She will beat herself up and she will need the love of a family. I know it's a hard thing to ask, but I'm dying and I know it. I love you. You have made me a very blessed and happy man. Don't carry the anger with you. You are too good for that. Please tell the kids, all the kids, how much I love them and how proud they have made me. Even Hannah. Tom will help you with the finances. The house is paid for, you'll have my pension and I have set up accounts for all the kids. Ask for help from Tom. He'll help with the kids especially."

"Mike, please don't talk like this. It isn't good for you."

"I'm dying. I can talk how I want. I just wish I could see Hannah one more time. Reiterate everything especially how much I love her."

"Mom?"

"You needed to hear it. But more so, Mallory needed it."

"I thought you said things could be happier? I want that."

"Now we watch. Tom is stepping out of the elevator now."

Hannah and Christine stood back and watched Tom open the door. Hannah took a deep breath thinking the real life version of herself had decided not to come back but instead she ran through the door. Mallory barely had time to grab Tommy before the rail was dropped down and Hannah jumped onto the bed. Mike wrapped both arms around her and pulled her to where she was laying on his chest. All that could be heard was her sobbing into his hospital gown.

"What's going to happen?"

"You'll just have to watch. Tom was right though, he welcomed you with open arms. I have to leave soon. You will remember all this but you will never speak of it. It'll be the reminder not to take anything for granted."

"Will Daddy be okay?"

"Yeah, his vitals are already getting better."

"So what now?"

"I leave and you and your dad have a talk."

"That sounds scary."

"Me leaving or the talk?"

"Both, but the talk more so."

"You'll manage through it. I have to leave but don't forget that I'm Tommy's angel and I will also be keeping an eye on you. Watch the attitude with your dad and love your family. That's what you need to know. I love you."

"I love you too. Did you know how it was going to turn out all along?"

"Maybe. I'll see you sometime in the distant future."

"Mom, what about Lucas?"

"Lucas is fine. He's your dad's angel."

"Wow."

Hannah looked around and Christine was nowhere around. Mallory and Tom were still in the room. She had handed the baby over to Tom and was checking the monitors. Mike still had Hannah on his chest and his coloring was getting better. Doctor Elliott had walked in with the nurse.

"I thought I ordered that Hannah not come in to visit?"

"I asked for her."

"Sir, she caused all this."

"I don't care. I feel better with Hannah here. I want her to stay."

"Doctor Elliott, I understand and appreciate your reasoning but my husband's blood pressure, pulse and pulse ox are all improving since Hannah came in the room. I think it would be a good idea to do an Echo on him but his coloring is better and his skin isn't clammy like it had been."

"You are a pediatrician, and a resident at that. I'm an attending."

"I understand. But it is his choice. To keep him from becoming agitated, we opted to have our daughter here. It was simply a matter of what's best for him. Now, if you want to further discuss this, I suggest we talk in the hallway."

Mallory followed the doctor into the hallway. Tom seemed uncomfortable because he knew Mike needed to talk to Hannah and it wasn't something he needed to be there for. Mallory had brought in the car seat with her and so he laid Tommy down in it and covered him with a blanket.

"Mike, I can take the baby with me but I think you guys need some time."

"Leave him. Would you bring me a cup of coffee?"

Tom nodded at him and moved the car seat closer to the hospital bed. Thankfully Tommy was a sound sleeper. Tom patted Mike's arm and rubbed Hannah's shoulder. She was still crying into Mike's chest. She had calmed somewhat but was still really upset. Tom had known as soon as she walked out of the chapel that she was going back to the hospital room. He hadn't tried to talk to her. He had kept his hands on her shoulders to keep her on track to the room. She was emotionally exhausted. Tom made a fast exit. It just didn't feel right to stay. Mallory was arguing with Doctor Elliott and Tom headed to the cafeteria.

Hannah felt completely wrung out. She knew her dad wanted to talk but she wasn't even sure what to say to fix things. If she stayed cuddled up, she could avoid it. Her dad still had both arms around her and she could hear his heart beating. He had kissed her on top of the head multiple times. Tommy made a cooing noise in his sleep and she could feel her dad trying to lean over to check on him, all while not disturbing her. It was time to face the music. She sat up and looked over to the car seat.

"He's still asleep. He does that in his sleep a lot."

"Good. You ready to talk?"

"I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"I don't know how to fix what I said. I don't think I can. I want to but I don't know how."

"Okay, we'll talk it out. Can you get that water? I'm parched." Hannah grabbed the cup of water and helped Mike sit up. Mallory and Doctor Elliott had come in and Hannah stepped back.

"Mike, Doctor Elliott is going to do an Echo. See what's going on now. Hannah, I know you know about this test, you can stay if you want to. If you don't want to, you can go to waiting room."

"I'll stay if that's okay?"

"It's fine with me. Mike?"

"I'd prefer Hannah stay."

Tommy had woke up and Hannah was holding him while Mallory and Doctor Elliott performed the test. She stood back and just prayed that there would be no lasting damage. Hannah didn't know what to do if there was damage.

"I don't understand, Doctor Slattery, you saw the earlier Echo. You saw the damage to his left ventricle. Now there is none."

"It doesn't look like anything happened at all. His heart looks like a twenty year old's. How long does it take Broken Heart Syndrome to heal normally?"

"Normally, there would be scar tissue. It would show for months or years after."

"I don't see anything of that nature but I'm not a cardiologist."

"I am and I have no explanation. Admiral Slattery, how do you feel? Any pain?"

"Just tired and I feel like I've been kicked in the chest. I want to go home."

"I think a stress test is in order. I want to see how your heart handles it. After that, if things go well, I see no reason to keep you here. Your wife can observe you. As far as the kick to the chest, you had CPR performed on you and were shocked back into a normal rhythm. It's normal. You have some bruises there too.

"Let's get it done."

"Mike, would you like to rest first?"

"No. I want to go home."

"I can stay with Tommy while you guys do that." Hannah was as wore out as Mike and going home sounded good. Not because she wanted to avoid the inevitable but because being home just seemed like a better place to hash out their problems.

"Okay, let me get you guys settled in the waiting room and we'll get the test started. It won't take too long." Mallory walked Hannah to the waiting room and helped her get Tommy settled down. She was oddly quiet and Hannah knew that Mallory was still extremely angry at her. She had a right to be. About five minutes after Mallory went back to the hospital room, Tom came in with a breakfast sandwich and hot chocolate for Hannah. He also had coffees and sandwiches for Mike and Mallory. He held Tommy while Hannah ate. He was not talkative but didn't seem angry. She knew that her dad would forgive her but she was beginning to wonder about Mallory and Tom.

Hannah fell asleep holding Tommy, leaned into Tom. She didn't know how long she slept but woke up hearing her dad's voice. He gently shook her awake and Mallory took the sleeping baby out of her arms. Mike was wearing a pair of scrubs and despite looking exhausted, looked to be the picture of health. Mallory had left Tom's truck back at his house and had picked up her SUV. Ordinarily Mike would have sat in the front seat but he sit in the back. Hannah was in the middle, next to Mike. It was only a fifteen minute ride to the house but they both fell asleep leaned into each other.

Mallory tapped both of them on the leg, waking them up. Hannah carried the baby in with Mike following. Mallory had gone to Tom and Sasha's with Tom and Hannah suspected that she would be gone for a little bit because she had told Mike to text her when Tommy woke up. Hannah laid him down in his crib. She had no idea what to do next. Mike was showering and shaving. Hannah went into her bedroom and looked at the flowers from the night before. Attached was a card that said "I love you and I am sorry, Daddy." It made her tear up again. She checked on Tommy again and decided to play her violin. It wouldn't wake the baby up and she knew that her dad loved it when she played. Charlie hated her spending so much time in basketball practice and playing her violin. She had realized he wasn't worth it but it could still cost her, her family. She pulled the violin out of the case and sit down and started playing "Silent Night." Without sheet music, it was the only song she could think of. She was really out of practice and it was frustrating.

Mallory came in and heard the violin music coming from upstairs. The younger girls wanted to go for a movie and pizza and Sasha had volunteered to watch Tommy so Mike and Hannah could have some time to themselves. Emma and Sailor had been told that Mike had gotten sick but no other details. They wanted to give him a hug and kiss before they left for the movie and Mallory needed sometime away from Hannah. She knew the anger wasn't good and she did understand how Hannah's boyfriend had led her astray. She had almost lost her husband though and needed the distance. She would forgive Hannah because she knew it was healthy for her family but the hurt would take a while. Mallory could hear Mike in the shower and she stuck her head in the bathroom to give him the game plan.

"Babe, you okay?"

"Yeah. Just taking a breather."

"Are you out of breathe?"

"No, no. Just wanted a break before I talked to Hannah. She's scared."

"Of you?"

"My reaction. Is she playing violin?"

"Yeah. I'm going to nurse Tommy, take him over to Tom and Sasha's, and take Emma and Sailor to see a movie and grab a pizza. The girls think you got sick and so they want to give you a hug and kiss before we go. They don't know that Hannah caused it. I don't have the heart to tell them. And I need a bit of a break from her. Sorry, but I do."

"Come here?"

"You're in the shower?"

"Not the first time you've joined me in the shower. Grab me that towel then, please." Mallory laughed and threw him the towel and he wrapped it around his wasted. The shower turned off and she could hear the violin music and all the squeaks. Hannah hold lost some serious ground, playing.

"Not the first time I've seen you naked either."

"Can't do anything about it right now, unfortunately. Stupid catheter. Babe, I get that you're upset and angry with Hannah. And you have that right. I'm angry at her too. But I also know you, and I know that you love Hannah as much as I do. As angry as we are with her, she's angrier with herself. I don't know her reasoning for saying that she hated me and wanted me to die but I do know my daughter and I know she is beating herself up over it. I'm asking you to let it go…"

"Mike, I understand what you're saying and I do love Hannah. I'm not angry at her but at myself."

"Why? You're amazing."

"After the paramedics took you, I told her that if you died, I wouldn't want her here anymore. What kind of mother does that make me?"

"You were emotional and I understand it. I don't think you could have done it. You would have wanted her here too because you're an amazing mom."

"I can't unsay what I said to her."

"Babe, we are all going to have to do a lot of forgiving and forgetting. Hannah is going to have to forgive me for being gone so much and forgive you for what you said when you were scared. I have to forgive her for what she said and try to get past it. And I need you to forgive me for scaring you so badly."

"No forgiveness for that is necessary. I guess you have a point. I need to have a talk with her too."

"Let me talk to her. I need to gauge what's going on. I think this has something to do with that boyfriend. What do you know about him?"

"Not much of anything. I invited him to dinner so I could get to know him better. You were at Pearl Harbor then. He came but he was extremely rude and disrespectful. I didn't like the way he treated Hannah. Shades of Bradly. I warned her and she apparently told him that I didn't care for him and if I didn't, you'd hate him. She started distancing herself then, acting out, refusing to help with the kids. Totally different kid. I think he is who instigated everything. And he hates the military."

"That won't go far in this house. Hard to believe that Hannah is so easily influenced."

"She's young and in love, or so she thinks. It's kind of normal. She doesn't understand what love is really about. And you have the added problem of her having been so ill. It affects her self-worth. And he played into that."

"Do you think that they had sex?"

"Wow, Mike, you love going to the worst case scenario. I don't think so. Despite what happened last night, she's a good girl. It may not hurt to ask her but that is probably a 'mom thing.'"

"Yeah, having the sex talk with my sixteen year old…not so much."

"Secretary of the Navy, ex-homicide detective and all you've faced and you're scared to talk to your daughter about sex?"

"And I have two more daughters and a son. I'll handle Tommy if you take care of the girls?"

"I'm getting the short end of this straw. I'd better go get Tommy woke up and fed. Emma and Sailor are downstairs and they expect hugs and kisses. Movie is two hours and pizza after. Gives you about three hours. I'll bring a pizza home for you guys. Tommy hates the bottle so I need to be home for his next feeding or we'll be up all night with him because he holds a grudge."

"He does love his mommy. I'm ready for him to be on the bottle so I can feed him. Last night when I was feeding him the bottle, he kept looking at me like I had two heads. I thought he might have forgotten who I was. I was terrified of that, actually. I'm done shaving. I'll dress and go downstairs with the girls."

"Oh, darn, I was hoping you would stay in your towel all night."

"Cute. You okay?"

"Yeah. Just hoping Hannah will forgive me. I was so scared."

"And I hate that I scared like that. Hope you can forgive that?"

Mallory just nodded and kissed him. Tommy started crying and Hannah squeaked her violin again. As Mallory walked into Tommy's room, she heard her sigh with frustration. Hannah had a lot of catching up to do. She knew that she was probably playing because Mike loved listening to it and Hannah was a perfectionist. Tommy was definitely ready to be fed and was thrilled that Mallory was nursing him. She heard Mike head down the stairs and the girls talking to him. Mallory covered the baby with a blanket and walked down the steps. Hannah had followed Mike downstairs and they were all discussing movie options. Hannah's body language showed how nervous she was and despite everything, Mallory felt horribly for her. She sat down next to her and patted her knee. She could feel how tense Hannah was and knew that Mike would hate her being so scared. After Tommy finished nursing, Mallory handed him over to Mike to burp and hold until she got the diaper bag packed and the girl's ready.

Mallory finally got the two girls out the door and Mike took Tommy to Sasha. By the time he got back to the house, Hannah was sitting on the couch with her knees drawn up to her chest and was crying again. Mike grabbed a full box of tissues, and two bottles of water. It was going to be an exhausting couple hours and they were all short on sleep. He sat the water and tissues on the table and sit down next to her, pulling her into a hug. She needed to talk but was completely overwrought.