The chapel was eerily quiet as Seneschal Varel reached for the goblet. Alix clenched her hands into fists, so hard that her nails dug deep into her palms. At her side, one respectful step behind her, Nate was keeping watch, a calm, reassuring presence, but even so she felt physically sick. Alix hated this moment, just before the actual Joining, when the life of a new candidate got thrown into the balance. She had seen too many ceremonies end in death not to dread the outcome.

On the other side of the room, Anders and Velanna were waiting, their faces unreadable. Even Oghren looked sober and restrained for once. He seemed to be quite taken with his fellow dwarf, even though Sigrun had firmly rebuffed all his advances. Still, it had to be nice for him, to have someone around who came from the same place, who knew what he was talking about when he mentioned Orzammar. Someone who understood. Maker knows, I'd love that.

Varel's deep, carrying voice tore her out of her thoughts. "From this moment forth, Sigrun, you are a Grey Warden."

Sigrun's lips were set in a determined line. "Then let it be." She drained the cup without so much as flinching.

For a heartbeat, she kept standing, looking serene and unperturbed, and Alix allowed herself a brief glimmer of hope. But then Sigrun's eyes rolled upwards until only the whites were visible and she slumped to the floor with a loud thud. Anders was at her side in a flash, cursing under his breath. One look into his face made Alix' heart sink. This was bad.

"Shit! Shit, shit, shit!" Anders' hands were moving at frantic speed, sending wave after wave of healing energy into Sigrun's body, but she was convulsing badly, her whole body twisting into a stiff arc.

"What's happening? Anders?" Sinking to her knees beside Sigrun's prone body, Alix tried in vain to hold her down. She had never seen anything like this. Some candidates had simply dropped dead, others had fainted briefly, but this…

"No idea." Anders' face was a mask of concentration, but she could see his hands trembling with effort. "She's fighting, but I don't know how much more she can take. Damn it, I need-"

Alix knew what he needed. Power, more power than any lyrium potion could provide. And he needed it now. Without thinking, she placed her hand on his shoulder and focussed hard. Anders made a small, surprised noise, and for a moment, she felt him push back against her, but then he relaxed and let her in.

There was no big flash, nothing visible on the outside, but Alix felt Anders' spine straighten under her touch, felt his strength come back. Taking a deep breath, she let go, as far as she dared, pouring her magic into him, holding nothing back.

She had no idea how long it took. With every moment, she was losing her sense of self a little more, as the lines between her and his aura blurred further. All the while Anders kept muttering healing spells, kept fighting for Sigrun's life, kept going until the room suddenly dissolved around her, and everything went black.

It was Nate's hoarse voice that woke her. "You did it. She's alive. Maker, Alix, you did it, you and Anders."

Slowly, Alix opened her eyes. Garevel and Varel were helping Sigrun to her feet. She looked pale and shaken, but yes, she was alive. When Alix turned her head, her gaze fell on Anders, lying flat on his back on the floor. He looked pretty much exactly as drained as she felt right now, but when his eyes met hers, he smiled softly. Alix smiled back, almost overcome by the intense emotional connection she felt.

"You need to rest, both of you." Nate was making a valiant attempt at smiling, too, but there was a deep, worried frown on his forehead.

Alix nodded. "You take Anders up to your room and look after him. Velanna can help me. And later…" She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to regain her composure. "Will you come and see me tonight? Both of you?"

"Of course." One last squeeze of her hand, and Nate let go, moving over to help Anders to his feet. "We'll be there."

Anders leant against the mantelpiece, enjoying the fire's warmth, lost in his own thoughts. The morning's healing had been exhausting in more ways than one, but at the same time it had left him strangely elated. Doing magic with Alix, feeling her power pulse through his body as she helped him work the healing spell, had been incredibly intimate, almost more so than sex. He hadn't done this for years, allowing another mage so close, and he still wasn't quite sure why he'd done it. To save Sigrun, sure, but Anders didn't fool himself. If it had been anyone but Alix, he wouldn't even have considered it.

But he'd done it, he'd opened himself up to her, and by the Maker, he'd liked it. Her magic had felt amazing, complementing his own like a missing puzzle piece, almost as if they'd been made for each other. He made a face at his own thoughts. You're letting your imagination run away with you, as usual, he silently chided himself. And yet, even now he felt a pleasant frisson at the memory of her power caressing his every nerve ending.

Alix had poured a goblet of wine for each of them. She had spent most of the day asleep, and she looked happy and relaxed for once. It was a beautiful look on her. Her dark hair, released from its customary strict bun, framed her face in soft waves, and she was smiling at something Nate had said. So lovely.

"Alix?" Anders barely raised his voice, but she responded immediately, her eyes meeting his with an expression that was almost… hopeful? Nervously, he licked his lips. He badly wanted to kiss her, but he couldn't just presume. "Thank you. For what you did down there. I think you may have saved Sigrun's life."

"Don't mention it." Alix was blushing slightly, and it made her look even prettier. "Thank you for allowing me to help."

"My pleasure." He let the slightest hint of innuendo creep into his words, and he was pleased to see her blush deepen further. Yes, she understood him well enough, and clearly, the thrill had been there for her, too.

And suddenly, he couldn't wait any longer. "Will you kiss me? Please?"

He heard Nate inhale sharply, felt the sudden increase of tension in the room, like an electric crackle. Taking two steps towards Alix, he extended his arms with a hopeful look. She melted into his arms without hesitation, as if she'd been waiting for him to initiate the kiss. And when their lips met, it was heaven, sweet and soft and perfect and Anders moaned into her mouth, trembling with desire.

"Oh Maker, you are so hot together." Nate's hoarse whisper went straight through his groin, the knowledge that his lover was watching them, and that he was just as excited, just as worked up as he was.

Alix arched into his body, offering herself to him, practically begging for his touch. And he wasn't about to deny her. Not now. Not ever.

With shaking hands, he tried to work the sash of her robes loose, eager to feel her soft skin. When he cursed under his breath at the intricacy of the knot, she laughed softly, and then her hands were there to help him, quickly untying it. The thick velvet fabric slid to the ground, pooling at her feet. She wasn't wearing a breastband, and his hands found her breasts without further prompting, cupping them gently.

Alix moaned softly, her eyes closed in bliss, and she was so beautiful like this, with none of her usual barriers in place, open and soft and vulnerable. Bending down to kiss her deeply, he drank in her sighs, so sweet, so intoxicating. His robes joined Alix' on the floor, and now they were skin to skin, his hard cock pressed up against her stomach, and she felt so wonderful he could have died.

"Anders," she whispered against his lips. "Make love to me. Please."

Instinctively, he looked to Nate for confirmation, but his lover was still watching them patiently, still holding back, though the tense line of his shoulders showed how much his restraint was costing him. Alix made a small, impatient noise, and he was struck by an idea.

"Close your eyes." Slowly, he ran his hands all over her body, getting rid of her underwear in the process, and then he took a step back, breathing in deeply to focus his powers.

"What-" Alix gave a small cry of surprise.

"Shhh." With infinite care, he wrapped her in his magic, every inch of her, from her head down to her toes. And judging from her reactions, she liked the feel of it, just as much as he'd enjoyed her power. She was practically writhing with delight, panting slightly.

Smiling to himself, Anders took another deep breath. Now. He had to concentrate hard to make this work. Levitation spells had always come easy to him, and they were common enough party tricks: pouring wine from a floating bottle, pelting an unsuspecting friend with flying peanuts, stuff like that. But this was on a whole different level.

Breathing slowly and steadily, he lifted her bodily from the ground. The moment her toes left the carpet, Alix cried out again, and her eyes flew wide open, staring at him with a mixture of shock and awe.

"Shhh," he repeated. "Lie back."

She opened her mouth, as if to say something, but then she obeyed, moving slowly until she was on her back, floating on the cloud of magic he'd shaped to support her. He waited until she'd relaxed, and then he gave her a tiny push, enough to make her drift away from him, over to the bed.

Nate had been watching the whole scene without saying a word, without even raising an eyebrow. But as soon as Alix had safely arrived on the bed, he got to his feet and began to take his clothes off, slowly, piece by piece. About time.

Alix looked slightly dazed, but not unhappy, and when Anders joined her on the bed, she pulled him into her arms without hesitation. He allowed himself one deep, slow kiss, but then he pulled back and began to work his way down her body.

He went for her breasts first, catching one nipple between his lips and suckling gently until it was stiff and rosy, then giving the other one the same treatment. Alix whined with delight, and when he moved on to her stomach, she arched up impatiently under him, making him smile.

Running his hands up her thighs, he revelled in the smoothness of her skin before he pushed them wide apart and slid even further down. And then he dove in.

Anders' mouth was divine. There was no other word for it, for the things he was doing to her with his tongue and lips and teeth, tasting her like the sweetest nectar, so eager, so hungry. And his fingers, long and dexterous, spreading her open, stroking her insides so deliciously that Alix wanted to cry.

Just when she thought it couldn't get any better, Anders pulled back a little, arranging her at the edge of the bed, and then Nate was there, thick and hard, nudging against her while giving her a hopeful look. When she nodded, he exhaled slowly, as if relieved. He kept holding her gaze as he pushed inside her, inch by careful inch. Once he was fully settled, he barely moved, just a few shallow thrusts, but it was more than enough. He filled her completely, providing the perfect counterpoint to Anders' skilful tongue.

Because Anders' mouth had never left her, teasing and soothing by turns, driving her higher and higher, until nothing else mattered but the pleasure building up inside her, so incredibly overwhelming it almost scared her. And yet she wanted more, needed more. Her fingers buried deep in the soft strands of his hair, she held Anders' head where she wanted it, because she couldn't allow him to stop, couldn't let go of him for a single moment, not when she was so close already. And Anders seemed to know instinctively what she needed, because once again, he increased the tempo and the urgency, his tongue fluttering against her like a thousand butterflies.

And Alix came, came with a long drawn out sob, came clenching hard around Nate, shivering and trembling all over. Anders pulled back a little, allowing Nate to gather her up in his arms and hold her tight, and she clung to his shoulders as if they were a lifeline.

"Are you okay?" Nate was chuckling softly in her ear.

"Yes. Just… I need a moment…" Alix was panting so hard she had trouble forming the words. "So good."

"Glad to hear it." His hands were warm and sure on her back, stroking her with the utmost gentleness until she had calmed down a little. "Now…"

Stretching out on top of her, Nate arranged her thighs around his slim hips, and she blushed when she realized he was still firmly lodged inside her, still hard and wanting. "Hold on." With one swift move, he rolled them both over, and now she was on top, straddling him. Carefully, he steadied her with both hands. "I think Anders would appreciate a little bit of your attention."

Anders was kneeling on the bed next to them, watching them with an expression of such sheer, naked hunger that it made her shiver. And he, too, was hard, hard and lovely.

"Come here." Alix smiled shyly at him, and he complied immediately, when he realized what she was suggesting.

The moment she wrapped her lips around him, his head sank back and he sighed, a long, happy sigh of relief. The muscles in his flat stomach fluttered as she took him in deep, and one of his hands found its way into her hair, tugging gently. Anders was always gentle, she thought dimly, even as she struggled to accommodate as much of his length as she could, always considerate. Nate could be rough at times, but Anders, for all his obvious impatience, would never push, never demand.

Closing her eyes, Alix focussed on tasting him, feeling him, working out exactly what pleased him. A quick flutter of her tongue against his flesh made him whimper, and when she suckled, softly at first, he made the most delicious noise in the back of his throat. Ah, but this is just the beginning, mon cher. Trailing a hand up along the inside of his thigh, she summoned a spark of magic to her fingertips, careful not to overdo it. He was so caught up in what she was doing to him with her mouth that he didn't realize what she was planning until her hand had reached its goal: that spot behind his balls where the skin was so incredibly soft. Placing her index finger there, she concentrated and-

"Andraste's curly short-hairs!" Anders practically yelped, and she felt him pulse against her tongue, so hard that she almost feared she'd gone too far. But somehow, he controlled himself, somehow, he fought his way back from the edge, and when he spoke next, his voice sounded feverish. "Again."

She obliged willingly, and when Anders cried out once more, Nate echoed the noise. He was watching her, watching them, his grey eyes dark with want, but he didn't move, even though she felt him twitch and grow inside her. And somehow the fact that he was there, caressing them both with his gaze, made everything twice as exciting. Anders was whining now, struggling to keep himself from thrusting into her mouth, and she knew it would take little more to push him over the edge. One more spark of magic, one last gentle suck, and he cried out, almost sobbing as he poured himself into her mouth, trembling all over.

And now even Nate's patience was at an end. The moment she let go of Anders, he thrust up hard below her, his hand on her lower back keeping her firmly in place. And Maker, he felt good, hitting her in all the right places, making her clench hard around his shaft.

"Damn it, Alix, you-" He sat up, gathering her close in his arms, catching her lips in a deep, hungry kiss, and at the same time, his hips snapped hard against her again.

Alix whimpered, too overcome to care what she sounded like, and clung to him, holding on for dear life as he took her higher and higher, holding her so close it barely left him room to move. Yet every single shallow thrust sent sparks of pleasure all through her body until she just couldn't take it anymore. Her climax hit her with an intensity that was almost frightening. She ended up biting down hard on his shoulder in an effort to stifle her cries, so hard that she tasted blood.

He was too far gone to notice, though, or maybe it was the brief moment of pain that did it, but he joined her only seconds later, pushing so deep inside her it almost hurt. "Alix. Oh Maker."

They were both panting when they slowly disentangled from their embrace. Nate flinched when she brushed against the large bruise on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry." Alix felt her cheeks heat up.

"Don't be." Anders was right behind her, his voice full of gentle amusement. "He can take it. And besides… See?" Reaching past her, he muttered a quick spell, brushing his hand against Nate's skin. The angry red welts immediately disappeared. "As good as new."

"Hey. I wanted to keep that. As a souvenir." Nate sounded genuinely offended, but at the same time he was grinning happily.

"A souvenir? Really?" Alix felt the corners of her mouth twitch.

"Mmhmm." Somehow, his voice sounded even raspier than usual. "I wanted to feel it, all through the day tomorrow. And whenever I'd feel the pain I'd be reminded of this." His gesture took in the whole room.

"My apologies." Anders was shaking his head with a smile. "I had no idea. Of course, you could always see about getting another one…"

"Sounds good to me." Nate tilted his head questioningly to the side. "What do you say, Alix?"

Alix couldn't deny that she was tempted. And yet, she was also tired, and her head was spinning with the implications of everything that had happened today. "I… I think I need some sleep now, guys. I'm sorry."

Nate would have loved nothing more than spending the whole night in Alix' room, but when she asked them to leave, he told himself firmly that he needed to respect her wishes. Not just because she was his Commander, but because he couldn't, wouldn't risk offending her. She had already become far too important to him.

He and Anders walked back to their own room. They cleaned up in companionable silence, and then settled on the big four-poster together. Anders seemed quiet, almost subdued, and Nate wondered what was on his mind.

"So… What exactly happened down there, during the Joining?" He did his best to sound casual, but he probably wouldn't fool Anders. They knew each other too well for that. "I mean, I could tell that Alix somehow… I don't know, added her power to yours, but-"

"It was more than that, Nate." Anders closed his eyes for a moment. "It's… I'm not sure I can really explain this to someone who's not a mage himself."

"Try me." Nate shrugged, feeling a teensy bit offended.

"What she did…" Anders swallowed hard. "It's not something you'd usually offer, or accept, for that matter. Not unless you're very close already."

"Why?" Nate was genuinely intrigued now. "It seems really useful."

"Yes, but…" Anders bit his lip, avoiding his gaze. "When you open your power channels like this, when you allow a connection of this kind… it's not just magic that travels. It's your thoughts, your feelings, part of your innermost self. And that's not something you'd share with just anyone."

"I see." Nate nodded slowly. "So… when you were connected to Alix, what was she thinking? Or feeling?"

"It's not like that. I can't read her thoughts clearly, just get a feel for her emotions." Again, Anders hesitated. "And I'm not sure I ought to even tell you. I don't want to betray her trust. Then again, it kind of concerns you too." He took a deep breath. "She was sad. Sad and confused. I think some part of her is still grieving Philippe, her lover. They must have been incredibly close. And yet… I believe she's falling in love with you, Nate."

"With me? Or with us?" Nate hadn't missed the flash of anxiety on Anders' face.

"Oh." Anders' expression became more confident. "I hadn't actually… But yes, it could be both of us, I guess. Anyway, there is definitely something. Maybe she doesn't even really know it herself, or she won't allow herself to feel it, but she cares. It's not just sex."

Nate felt a shiver run down his spine. Extending his hand, he pulled Anders closer. "And how do you feel about that? Do you mind?"

"No, I don't think I do." Anders shook his head, looking dazed, and somehow bewildered. "I mean, I need more time to process all of it, but no. I think I'm good with it. Unless you want me to leave?" There it was again, this flash of vulnerability in his face, and it broke Nate's heart.

"Never." He tightened his hold on Anders' slim body, embracing him fully now. "Don't even think about it. I love you."

Anders' face lit up in a sudden sweet smile. "And I love you. Let's talk about this tomorrow, okay? I'm tired."

Huggles and thanks to my lovely beta suilven. :)