Still Standing

Authors note:

Ok, first off I'd like to apologise for the spelling mistakes in the previous chapters, (maybe I'll learn to read through what I've written before posting it). Also I would like to apologise in advance for this chapter as I felt it was rather rushed and is lacking slightly in quality, but it's not completely my fault as the chapter was being insolent. Lol.

Disclaimer:

Ok, I know I'm bored of saying it. And you're all bored of hearing it, but I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or its card duels of death and destruction.

Chapter 3 : Self Destruction.

By the time Yuugi reached his locker he felt numb. Numbness had wrapped it's cold fingers around his mind, chasing away all coherent thoughts. Leaving him alone to concentrate on Bakura's words… 'He is me. As you are the Pharaoh.'

The lump in his throat was trying to dissolve into tears. But he wouldn't cry at school, he just refused to. He shoved his hands into his pockets and trudged slowly down the still and peaceful corridor, glad for the stillness before the rush of students cascaded into the halls, ready for home. He just wanted to be alone right now. But, on the other hand he didn't exactly know what to do with himself. Everything inside him was contradictory. He didn't want company, and yet he was achingly lonely. He did want to think, but now he was trying to, his thoughts eluded him.

"Hey, Yuug! Wait up."

Yuugi felt the collision ricochet painfully through his small frame. Knocked off balance by an unseen force. He tried desperately to visualize what was around him as he stumbled blindly against the lockers lining the corridor walls. Then the world suddenly flickered back into focus and he found himself staring into the familiar brown eyes of Jonouchi.

"Where the heck have you been?" he said fiercely, cupping hold of the small teen's shoulders.

Yuugi grimaced. "I overslept."

He flinched at Jonouchi's incredulous look and quickly added. "I'm serious."

Jonouchi absently gnawed on his lower lip, Yuugi never overslept… well, hardly ever… not on a school day at least, his mother would never permit it.

Yuugi forced a small weak smile onto his lips; he could read the doubt in Jonouchi's expression. "Everything is fine, Jou. I promise."

The blonde leaned closer. Carefully inspecting Yuugi's cherub like face for any tells, any hint of the truth he was pretty sure was being withheld and hidden from him. To his annoyance he w as far too accomplished a liar for his own good. He pulled back with a soft sigh. "Yuugi," he said in gentle scolding, "sometimes I worry about you. I really do."

He hesitated. Then turned to his friend, his lips skimming his teeth in the barest echo of a smile, the sadness glinted as it clawed its way into his wide, almost childlike eyes. "Now, would I lie to you Jonouchi?" Yuugi asked as lightly as he could, trying to make the remark sound offhand and casual.

Jonouchi said nothing, but he gave Yuugi a keen searching look, once again exploring his face for the truth he was damned sure he was hiding. Searching for any trace of explanation hidden so expertly in his stance and expressionless face.

Then Jonouchi pounced.

Grabbing Yuugi in a headlock. Not so loose that the boy could escape easily, yet, not too tight as to hurt him. He made a fist with his other hand and rasped his knuckles firmly on his scalp, mussing his unruly hair and grinned wickedly. "You'd better not be, squirt." He teased. Chuckling throatily as Yuugi futilely twisted and squirmed in his grasp, barking short and breathless laughter.

"DOG PILE!"

Yuugi suddenly found himself free. Flung from Jonouchi's grasp as a shape barrelled recklessly into the blonde, he felt the impact vibrate through his body before they had been forcibly separated. He staggered then slumped against the lockers, secretly thankful for the surprise attack as he gulp cool air rapidly to soothe the burning sensation in his lungs. As the grey haze lifted from his vision he stared in bewilderment at the scene unfolding before his eyes. Jonouchi was bent over, hands on his thighs, deep-breathing. Honda wrapped an arm tightly around his neck in a firm headlock, grasping his wrist with an unmovable force. "You're getting sloppy, man." He grinned in determination and wrestled his captive roughly to the floor.

"Honda! You JERK!" Jonouchi screeched furiously in embarrassment. His fingers scrabbled desperately at the smooth flooring, seeking in vain for the leverage to buck Honda off. "You almost gave me a damned heart attack!"

Yuugi felt the attention shift, as the two boys squabbled and fought between themselves, he wheeled and bolted, weaving and dodging the trickle of students now appearing in the school halls. Honda raised his head, expecting to see Yuugi's grateful expression, his chest swelling in pride of his sneak attack and preparing a wink for the shorter teen, only to discover the boy had already fled. "Hey? Where the heck did Yuugi go?"

"What? He's gone?" the muffled voice beneath him questioned. Slowly Honda relinquished his grip on Jonouchi, who showed his gratitude by digging his elbow into Honda's ribs and shunting him away. "Awww! DAMNIT!"

"What the heck is going on here, Katsuya?"

Jonouchi hissed in bitter annoyance at the usage of his first name, then frowned and tilted his head thoughtfully as he pushed himself to a sitting position. "Do you think something's up with Yuug? He's been acting a bit strange lately, like something's bothering him."

Honda cocked a brow in confusion, Yuugi always acted a little strangely, that was who he was. That was the reason why, back in freshman year, he and Jonouchi picked on him. He was the class nerd, the weird one that was always alone, an easy target. But that was years ago now, he shook his head and returned to Jonouchi's question. "Something is usually always up when it concerns Yuugi, especially now the Pharaoh's here permanently." he said grimly, and then he broke into a lewd grin. "As for the 'something bothering him', that's usually rectified by one of your 'videos' and locking Yami out of the bedroom for a half hour." Jonouchi shoved himself to his feet, brushed the seat of his pants down, and then swiftly punched Honda's shoulder. "No. You pervert!" he said, trying desperately to keep his face and tone serious. "I mean, don't you think he's been acting kinda jumpy and short tempered lately?"

"Sorta supports my 'He's horny' theory." Honda said, dodging a second punch aimed at his shoulder. "I'm guessing you don't think this is a 'Yuugi just being Yuugi' situation, do you? You think something's up." Jonouchi bit his lip and nodded.

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Yuugi slowed at last, and allowed his legs to stumble to a halt. The pain in his chest had reignited and he was shaking all over, but the inescapable urge to run still burned in his mind. His primal instincts, - dating back before civilization of any kind existed back when it was fight or flight; Kill or be killed,- waged war on his sense of rationality – 'Run!' the tiny voice in his mind screamed. 'The threat is still too great, you must run!'

He slumped against the school building, exhausted. His legs trembled and threatened to give way beneath him and he swallowed painfully large mouthfuls of air desperately, he felt starved of it. "I… I can't run anymore," he whispered, running his rough, sandpaper like tongue over his cracked lips. "I hurt. I'm too tired… too weak."

'Yes. Yes, you are too weak, boy!' that dark voice jeered him. 'Too weak to run… too weak to fight… just stay here and be picked off by a far more impressive specimen. For the weak don't deserve survival, and that's what you are child… too weak! Too weak! Too weak!'

"Stop it!"

Yuugi clutched his head in his hands. Twisting his fingers into his hair and pulling as he dropped to his knees, shaking his head in defiance and rocked slightly. "I'm not too weak!" he whimpered softly. "Not it the sense you're implying."

'Ah, but did you not use those words with Yami? "I'm pathetic and weak little Yuugi-kun." Were those not your words?' They were. He knew that. Those were almost his exact words. His heart thudded once, hard, squeezing two hot tears out of his eyes. There. He was crying at last. He was crying with anger and humiliation and frustration – and what else..? What had he really lost today? He didn't know. He felt a shadow fall over him. Prying his eyes open he looked up, startled. Sunlight blinded him. Distorting the form, so, for and instant the figure standing over him seemed alien, unfamiliar and vaguely menacing. He cowered, frozen in fear.

Then he saw a smile. That smile with the sadness always lurking behind it, then it was gone. No trace of it lingered on the lips nor in the eyes.

"Yuugi-kun," Ryo said softly, kneeling beside his friend, "Is everything alright?"

Yuugi immediately hissed with annoyance, "Why does everyone assume that there's something wrong with me today?" He pushed himself to his feet, wincing slightly at the twinge in his chest that reminded him of his injury.

"So, there's nothing wrong?"

Yuugi swung his glare to meet Ryo's sincere gaze and had the uncomfortable feeling that those dark and mysterious eyes saw what he was hiding beneath the surface. He breathed a shuddering breath.

' I know what you're thinking.' That dark berating voice sneered from the shadowed recess of his mind. 'You are weak, child. Relying on your friends… pathetic.'

Yuugi hesitated and swallowed hard. 'No. I'm not weak. I'm not pathetic.'

'And just who are you trying to convince, boy? Me, or yourself?'

He felt his chest tighten. Again tears threatened to spill. "Yes Ryo. There is something wrong." He whispered so quietly that Ryo almost missed it. Leaning closer, the silver haired teen smiled again. "Would you like to talk about it?"

Yuugi nodded in silence. Then he cracked. His small frame trembled and shook as the tears fell uncontrollably. Punching the heels of his palms to his eyes in an attempt to force the tears and the grief back into the pit of his stomach. After a few minutes his heartbreaking sobs eased. He felt so hollow, so empty as he slowly lowered his hands.

Carefully, Ryo thumbed away a tear that was steadily making its wet path down Yuugi's cheek. He'd never seen him like this and Ryo felt his heart go out to his friend. "What on earth is going on, Yuugi?" he asked the concern evident in his soft lilting voice.

Yuugi sniffled and hiccupped. "Why does he hate me?"

Ryo tried to say something, but Yuugi swept on regardless. "Why does he feel the need to humiliate me? He doesn't want me anywhere near him. Why does he live that way? Why does he have to build walls against other people to keep them out? That he can't trust anyone?" He fell silent now, his face averted. Taking a deep breath, he straightened his shoulders and lifted his head even though his eyes were sore and burning. "And what's wrong with me," he added quietly, "that when you look at me all I see is the disgust in your eyes. Why do you hate me so much, YAMI?"

"Yami?" Ryo cried is disbelief. Yuugi clapped a hand over his mouth in horror. He hadn't meant for that to slip out, but he'd become over emotional. Irrational.

"Is that what's been bothering you?" Ryo held Yuugi's gaze, the amethyst eyes were bleak, sightless, and something twisted sharply inside Ryo at the pain he saw on his face. "Yes." Yuugi's voice was controlled now – but barely. Ryo could hear the effort it cost him in keeping it steady.

"Yuugi…" he whispered. But Yuugi didn't seem to hear him; he seemed to be adrift in his own little world of misery, but there was not just grief in his expression, he could see the tortured look of unbearable guilt and loneliness. A look so lost and scared that without thinking Ryo lay a hand on his arm. "Yuugi. I can understand the pain this has caused. I can understand your need to protect Yami and your bond with him. But is it worth all the deception and secrecy?" There was a long pause, so long that Ryo didn't think he would answer. "No." Yuugi said quietly. "But," he added slowly, as if puzzling something out for himself, "I can't turn my back on him… I need him…"

"But, to hell with us right?"

Yuugi just stood there, numb with horror, as Jonouchi stood and scowled, his arms crossed over his chest and his head bowed slightly. But the iciness of his eye's unnerved Yuugi most; he had never faced Jonouchi like this. "Well Yuug?" he growled, his glare unwavering as he watched his friend shrink and withdraw away from him, "As long as you have Yami you couldn't give a flying fuck about us, huh?"

"No. That's not true Jou…" Yuugi pleaded. "You don't understand…"

He stepped forwards slowly, carefully placing each foot before lifting the next. "Oh, I 'understand' perfectly." He roughly shouldered Ryo to one side as he stepped between him and Yuugi, "I'm not good enough am I? Not good enough for you to talk to, you have Ryo for that. Not good enough to protect you, that's one of the many reasons you like Yami so damned much." He roughly grasped Yuugi's bicep and spun him to face him properly, causing him to yelp as he lost his footing and tumbled to the ground. His un-tucked shirt lifting from his back as he landed, face down in the dirt.

He heard Ryo gasp and Jonouchi swear before he felt a pair of strong hands grip his underarms and help him to his feet, before he could gather his thoughts, he felt gentle hands tugging his blazer off and then he felt his shirt lifted. Jonouchi swore again. An ugly black bruise spanned across Yuugi's shoulders and upper back.

"What the hell happened?"

"I… I don't know." Yuugi looked around at Jonouchi and Ryo, then shrugged, embarrassed. He wished they wouldn't stare at him so hard. He felt Jonouchi's hands on his shoulders now and he gave Yuugi the barest fraction of a shake. "Yuugi, this is not the time for you to act tough. Now is the time to stop acting. To stop lying. And to stop thinking about everyone else and put yourself first for once!"

Yuugi squirmed uncomfortably. Purposely avoiding Jonouchi's concerned eyes. "Yami," he said simply. "Yami and I… we had a fight this morning."

Jonouchi's eyes narrowed in unabashed rage. "So that makes it alright does it?!" he said, his voice so full of disappointment that Yuugi cringed. "That makes it alright for him to treat you like his own personal punch bag? And that it's alright for you to lie to your friends?"

"H-he didn't hit me… he pinned me…" he said blandly, inspecting his laces.

Jonouchi snorted. "Hit you or not. He hurt you."

"He didn't mean to."

"That's not the point, and you know it." Jonouchi gave him a gentle but firm shake. "You always think you deserve whatever you get, good or bad. But you don't deserve this. No one does. This shouldn't happen to you, Yuugi, not to you."

Yuugi stared straight at Jonouchi, eyes fathomless, face expressionless as he straightened to his full height. "Well it did." He said bitterly. Jonouchi clenched his teeth, squaring his jaw. He let go of Yuugi as he rolled his shoulders.

"But, it –" he grated.

" 'Shouldn't' I know. I get it," Yuugi tugged his shirt back down and snatched his blazer from Ryo who bent and scooped it from the floor. "But, the fact remains that it did. Besides, why shouldn't it? What's so damned special about me?" Jonouchi just stared. Yuugi was not prepared to listen to him, he worked his jaw stiffly and turned on his heel without a word and stalked away. 'Fine, if Yuugi was not prepared to listen to him, then he would show him.'

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The bell jingled sweetly in the Kame Game shop as the door swung open, announcing a visitor. Sugoroku glanced up from his newspaper and smiled warmly. "Ah. Why good afternoon Jonouchi." He folded the paper and placed it on the counter before locking his fingers together and resting his chin upon them. "I'm afraid Yuugi's not back from school yet, but you're welcome to…"

"I'm not here you see Yuug, Mr Mutou. I'm looking for Yami." Jonouchi forced as much politeness into his voice as he could even though he was raging on the inside.

Sugoroku's old weathered face suddenly hardened into a frown. "Yami's in the lounge. But I'd better warn you, he's not in his most friendly of moods today." Jonouchi smiled tightly and nodded his thanks before heading into the lounge.

As he turned the corner Jonouchi spotted him and growled softly, drawing his lips away from his teeth in a vicious grimace.

Yami lounged in an oversized, overstuffed armchair, one long slender leg outstretched and propped on the coffee table. Even in this lazy and slobbish position he radiated a regal air and an arrogant presence. As he shuffled through his Duel Monster's deck, Jonouchi noticed the tightly wrapped bandage on his right hand. He couldn't help but smirk. Then he stepped into the room, slightly annoyed that Yami didn't even acknowledge him. He stepped over the outstretched limb, hands on his hips and finally those slanted crimson eyes slid up to his face.

"Hello, Jonou-"

The rich and powerful voice was abruptly cut off as the blonde teen lunged and grasped the black, fitted, silken shirtfront and he was roughly yanked to his feet. His eyes narrowed. "Jonouchi? What is the meaning..."

"Don't." Jonouchi snarled softly, dangerously, cutting him off once again. "I'm warning you, Yami. Be very careful right now. I'm not in a tolerant mood."

Those crimson eyes narrowed even more as Yami's whole face creased in a dangerous fury, "How considerate of you to have the decency of warning me." He scoffed. "Now I have a question. Why are you warning me whilst dragging me to my feet?"

Jonouchi smiled a mirthless smile as he pushed his face close to Yami's. "Because it's you I'm pissed at."

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Ok. That actually turned out much better than I anticipated. Huzzah for me. Again I apologise for the highly charged emotion in this chapter, I promise the darkness will ease soon, but; 'Ooooooo. Yami's in trouble.' You know the drill by now… Please read and review because knowing that a few people out there are actually enjoying my first ever fan fic gives me a warm fluffy feeling inside… either that or I just swallowed a Kuriboh… eep!

Stay Smexy.