Still Standing.

Author's Note:

Thank you for all the wonderful comments you guys have left for me. I have only a few points to make before continuing with the story, which is what you guys really want. Firstly. Sorry to any of you who post questions in your reviews asking about what happens next, I have a little secret to share with you… I rarely know where the next chappie heads myself. I plot out three key points and a few lines of speech then cross my fingers and write… hoping it makes some kind of logical sense. I suck at organization.

Secondly. I never intended for Yuugi's self doubt to have a big a role as it has… this stems from my sucky organization once more.

Finally. This was meant to be the final chapter but I decided to prolong your agony and subject you to 6 chapters of my writing… mwa ha ha ha. (I have been taking torture lessons from Bakura) Also I have posted some fanart on under the name InkoftheShadows8678 because Deviantart was being mean.

Okay I'm babbling too much, here's chapter 5.

Disclaimer.

I don't own… You don't sue.

Chapter 5: Walk through the Darkness.

Yuugi shifted on his bed.

He was unhappy. A hot, restless unhappiness that he could feel swarming beneath his skin. Coming from his body instead of his mind. If he hadn't been so tired, so detached, he would have gotten up and tried to shake the uneasy feeling off. But even that required too much effort, too much thought. His mind was churning. He didn't want to think anymore. He wanted to sleep. He was happiest when he was asleep, retreating to where controlled thought was impossible. But sleep eluded him tonight, as it had done for the past few weeks. He shivered slightly. He could still feel the cold and ice in those crimson eyes, and he could still hear the hollow echo in the voice and it made him feel vaguely nauseated.

Yuugi turned over and pressed his face into the pillow. He had no idea what to do, but he knew laying here in the darkness and worrying wasn't helping.

A soft sound came from the hallway. Footsteps. Then there was a fan of light opening on the carpet as the door cracked.

"Yuugi? Are you asleep?" Yami whispered. "Can I come in?"

To Yuugi's slowly rising indignation, he was coming in, not bothering to wait for an answer.

'It's him,' That little dark and spiteful voice called in his mind. Stirring up those frighteningly familiar coils of anger in the pit of his stomach. 'The one who hurts you. The one who's shadow still looms over you.'

He wanted to be angry, he really did, but he was too exhausted.

"Go away!" he growled into his pillow.

"Yuugi. Please. Let me talk to you." Yami said softly. He made no attempt to come any closer, and no attempt to leave either. "I know you're upset. I know you're hurting. But I need you to listen to me now. I… I made a mistake… a bad one."

Yuugi heard the words, but they didn't seem real. He found himself ignoring them, retreating into a foggy state where thought was impossible. "I don't care."

"Yes. You do care." Yami said. "You're not thinking straight at the moment. You're irrational, that's all. Just let me explain."

A surge of irritation and anger swept over him – an animal surge, like the uncomfortable and feverish restlessness. He could feel his eyes narrow and his fingers claw. Anger gave him the strength to sit up.

"I said, Go Away!"

"No."

Yuugi just sat there for an instant, speechless, then his eyebrows puckered and his forehead creased into a frown. He felt too confused to protest as Yami came and knelt by his bedside.

"I'm not going anywhere until you listen to me."

"I won't. And you can't make me!" Yuugi spat. He knew he sounded childish but he didn't care. The irrational and angry part of him refused to subside. Then his anger faltered briefly; he noticed Yami hadn't made any attempt to come any closer to him, or even looked at him. Deliberately, Yuugi invaded his territorial space, reaching out a hand to lay on Yami's own, only to see him snatch it away, keeping the distance between them.

Suddenly, the anger was too great for him to hold in any longer. "Careful," he said savagely. "Don't get too close to me. You might catch something."

Yami slid his eyes up to meet Yuugi's angry look. "Yuugi," he said, the strain was obvious in his voice. "Please, let me-"

"You know," Yuugi said, his voice drained and exasperated as he shoved his bangs back with his knuckles, his eyes shutting briefly, "I really don't want to do this right now."

When he opened them again, Yami's eyes; wide and sorrowful, were fixed on his face, the look confused Yuugi for a moment. But in the next instant Yami's face hardened, closing him out again. "I think," he said slowly, deliberately. "that is a wise idea. Emotions are running high right now."

In that instant, Yuugi wanted to hurt him, to make him fell as he made him feel. But mostly he wanted the truth. He was tired of this game, tired of trying to read him, of trying to storm those damned walls. It was terrifying yet a wonderful release to hear his own voice saying those words he had been thinking for so long.

"Why do you hate me?"

Yami stared at him. For an agonizingly long moment he couldn't seem to find any words. Then, finally, he spoke. "I don't hate you."

"Yes you do," Yuugi said fiercely. "I don't know why you do, but I know for damned sure that you do. But you know what, I don't care. I know I should, but I really don't. You want to build your walls, then go ahead. You want to shut me out along with the rest of the world. Then I don't give a flying shit. I don't even know why you're still sitting here, listening to what I have to say… considering the way you feel about me."

Yami was shaking his head, but his voice was soft when he repeated. "I don't hate you."

But Yuugi couldn't stop. All these past weeks of pain and sadness, neglect and betrayal. All of the heart crushing loneliness poured out of him. "You've humiliated me time after time. You never listen to me. As long as the world cantered and revolved around you, you're happy. Is this what it takes?" He gestured at Yami's stitched up cut and his swelling lip. "Is this what it takes to get you to open your damned eyes? To have the shit kicked out of you?

And even now, you can't even look at me, can you?" He continued bitterly. "You don't want me anywhere near you. What the hell is the matter with you, Yami? What's so bad that you have to hide from the world? Shut everyone and everything out? Why are you so afraid?"

Yami was silent now. His face hidden by shadows.

"Why can't you look at me? Why can't you trust me?" he breathed. "I want the truth Yami. Don't you think you owe me that much at least?"

Slowly, Yami lifted his head. His eyes bleak and his pupils dilated. "Yes," he said simply. "I think you do have the right to know." He looked at Yuugi then, meeting his eyes directly and Yuugi swallowed hard. "I don't hate you. How could I? I still see you as I did that first time. You were so young, so delicate, almost fragile. And very vulnerable. Inside as well as out."

"I am not!" Yuugi snorted. Indignation rising in his chest.

Yami made a sound that would have been a laugh if there had been any humour in his voice. "No. now you're a fighter. You are stronger. And I couldn't accept that.

Yuugi felt his breathing hitch painfully in his throat. Finally he could understand. He could understand the reasons why Yami acted the way he did. It was like seeing him from a distance, and he could vaguely sense his emotions. It wasn't the same as sharing the mind link through the Millennium Puzzle. But it was enough. The warmth and longing and protectiveness he held for him were all clear. So was the anguish: the pain he felt to know Yuugi was hurting – and knowing that he was the one hurting him.

Yuugi's eyes filled. "You really do care." He whispered.

Yami's crimson eyes swept up to meet his, and there was a look in them Yuugi couldn't remember ever seeing in them before. "Of course I do"

'No. That's not possible.' The voice screamed. ' That can't be.'

'It is!' He wasn't talking to Yami anymore; he was trying to convince himself.

'No. He's impossible and dangerous and hot-headed and stubborn… he's crazy… he's angry and hostile… he's frustrating and infuriating and he loves to make you miserable…'

Yuugi felt the distant echo of fear. It was true… all of it. No. He didn't love to make him miserable, he could see that now. All this time that voice was the one trying to cause the rift. Not Yami. The voice made him feel small and pathetic. He grated his teeth and silently growled. 'I've had enough of you. You lied and told me he hated me. You told me I was weak and pathetic… not Yami.' His mind raged at the voice inside him. 'I want to trust him. I want to not be alone anymore. And the first step in doing so is to get rid of you!'

'Are you insane, boy? This is Yami! He hurt you… humiliated you… if you let him close to you, he'll do it again and again and again!'

Yuugi flinched wildly from the voice. He didn't want to resist the pull to Yami anymore. He didn't want to be alone… but the fear was shivering through him, poisoning the warmth and closeness' freezing the edges of his mind. And he knew the voice was the only rationality left in him. 'That's right child, listen to me. I am your salvation.' Part of him winced at that, tried to argue, but he brushed it aide. He needed his mind clear. Slowly, the voice retreated into the depths of his mind, accepting that Yuugi wasn't going to listen. Not now.

He shook his head.

"I know you do, Yami. I think I always did." Yuugi shivered lightly. Then he drew up his legs, clasping his hands around them. He looked at Yami with his chin on his knees. "No one likes change. I know I don't."

"I thought I was going to lose you, Yuugi. And I thought by distancing myself from you would make it easier to accept. Easier to let you go." He looks so cute that way, Yami thought helplessly. So- compact.

Yuugi winced. "You wouldn't lose me."

"I know that now. But you no longer need me to protect you, and I felt so…" Yami struggled to think of a way to describe it. Yuugi watched him with eyes that were clear and fathomless, sad and wry and gentle all at once. And suddenly Yami got it. He gasped. "Unnecessary."

Yuugi's eyebrows went up. "Really?"

"Yes. I've watched you grow up over the years. I've protected you as the bearer of the Puzzle. And I've never been as scared of loosing you as I am now. Knowing I can't watch over you whilst you're away."

"I don't want you to protect me like you used to." Yuugi said softly. He looked half discouraged and half relieved. "I'm not the chosen one anymore. I want you to be there for me like an older brother, not a vengeful spirit. You have your own life now, you have a home. Here, with me and mom and grandpa. As a Mutou." He chewed his lip. Then looked directly at Yami, not sure what else to say. Then he was vaguely aware that Yami was climbing onto the bed beside him. Encircling him in a tight secure hug.

"I can deal with you and grandfather, but your mother." He pulled a face. "Do I have to?"

Yuugi punched him lightly on the shoulder and chuckled. "All part and parcel I'm afraid."

Yami held him tighter, and sighed. "I guess, if I really have to, I can put up with her."

A thought emerged from the muddled consciousness of Yuugi's mind. "You really are a spoiled brat, aren't you."

And then Yami smiled. A genuine and bright smile, and Yuugi felt his heart lurch in joy at the sight of it.

"I've been born and bred to be a spoiled brat, aibou. And I take great pride in that title." Yami said in his old 'devil may care' tone. Then he flipped Yuugi over, onto his back and pinned him gently, straddling his Yuugi's hips and used his weight to force him deeper into the mattress. Yuugi bucked once and gave up. He was caught. Mischief danced wickedly in Yami's crimson eyes as he lowered his head to Yuugi's, pressing his forehead to the others, and sighed in contentment.

"Yami?"

"Hmmmm?"

Silence. Yami slid his eyes shut, happy to just be holding his aibou once again. Then he heard a tiny and happy voice.

"…. Nothing."

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Okay I know it was a short chapter but be happy as you do have a final chapter to go. I didn't want to rush the ending to this story because I've nurtured it and watched it grow into this and I have never felt such accomplishment. So please read and review . And no they are NOT being raunchy, I just thought it was a sweet way of showing affection. And hopefully people have forgiven Yami for being a jerk and hurt poor Yuugi in earlier chapters. I hope people can understand he was just trying to hold onto Yuugi because he was scared.

Anyway please read and review as comments are all read and appreciated.

"I'm not gay… I'm just British." Ryo Bakura in Yu-Gi-Oh abridged… produced by Little Kuriboh.

xxx