"Square One"
Disclaimer: Not yet.
Author's Note: ...Okay. This chapter is probably very OOC. But this 'dream' was something my homie and I came up with during some random conversation. You can disregard everything about the dream. This is basically a crap chapter. Well, not the end but...the rest is crap for sure. Good crap though. Yes...Good crap.–Nod- Yeah..I have 3 reviews! I love you guys...) –gives them all, all being...two people, cookies and toaster ovens-
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"Heaven vs. Hell" & Costa del Sol...
I will never...ever get that wasted again. I had the weirdest dream last night.
It started off with me trying to make some weird...food. And my house blew up. And I died and went to Hell for killing people or something. I meet two people. A chick and a guy in red...clearly..insane.After that I passed out. When I wake up, Satan is swirling my sunglasses around and breaks them. Since I get pissed off, I gather Hell's demons and whatnot to overthrow Satan. I kill him and become...lord of hell, I think.
So, after that a completely new scene comes in where Tifa is running her bar and this guy asks her for a vaccum.She tells him that she doesn't have one. The guy gets pissed off and kills her. She ends up in Heaven. When she sees Jesus, she asks him if she could run a bar. For some reason, Jesus gives out a dramatic "No." Eventually, he gets tired and tells her that he's gonna go tell his dad. So God...banishes Tifa into Hell.
I know..this is really...really fucked up, but I can't get the dream out of my head.So..I must write this down.
Now, something similar happens where it's a new scene. This time it's the princess of Wutai or something, Yuffie Kisa-something...So she's gets killed by an extremely powerful BB gun...and is sent to Hell for some reason.
So the two girls meet up and decide to wander about Hell.
When they find me being.."Satan" in Hell, Tifa tells me that God wouldn't let her run a bar. Then that guy in red, whose name is apparently Alucard, yells, "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!" So..I take Hell to war with Heaven.
During the war, Reno..up in Midgar and all...get shot in the head while having a hangover, and since everything's mixed up he's sent to Heaven where he sees that Ancient girl. I have no idea how she died...but she's there. She responds to his presence by, "What the fuck are you doing here?" Reno just...stares at her saying, "Holy fuck!" God floats by saying, "No cussing allowed in Heaven." So...they too get sent to Hell.
Reno finds out I'm the new Satan and asks for beer, but for some reason like everything else, I send him to the corner.
And because I was bored I went up to Midgar to challenge God to a card game, which will decide the fate of the world.
We have an intense game of...
Go Fish.
Then I woke up.
So anyways, I'm in Costa del Sol. A short vacation, I guess.Tseng, Reno, and Elena are here. Right now, I'm gonna go try and sleep this hangover off. I don't need to go to the shore like the rest. I like my vacation right here. On a pillow with a bottle of some hard liquor by my side...I hope I don't have another..weird dream...
Rude.