"They have corn dogs here? Real corn dogs?" Mal exclaimed. His wide eyes and grin revealed what he would have looked like at seven years old. It was a fleeting thought, but Inara began to wonder what that boy had been like, wish she could have seen. A Companion's face is carefully schooled to keep her thoughts hidden behind a calm smile. True, a slightly sticky calm smile- she'd run into a very hurried River and Jayne earlier. River had thrust the remaining cotton candy at Inara as though the pink treat had offended her. And, although River had been somewhat more together since Miranda, Inara wouldn't be surprised if, somehow River felt that the confection had, in fact, offended her.

"I wouldn't try one, sir," Zoe said. "This far out on the rim, it might be a bit more... literally canine... than you're bargaining for." Her own small smile lurched a little, faltered. Her hand drifted to her stomach.
"Are you all right?" Mal asked her, pitching his voice low, concerned.
Zoe's First-Mate-Can-Handle-Anything mask snapped back into place. "Fine, sir. I just- it sounded like something Wash would have said."

Inara, holding the cotton candy, edged away from Zoe, so she wouldn't have to smell it. She recognized the look on the First Mate's face, and remembered the perplexed, drawn faces she'd been making on frequent visits to Simon in the infirmary recently. She'd been skipping breakfast, as well. So far, Zoe had said nothing, but Inara wondered.

"Well, I aim to have one, regardless," Mal said. And, while munching the nasty, fried treat he purchased, he tugged them towards the booths.

Staying upwind of the junk food smells, Zoe regarded the bb gun booth with a determined stare. She set her credits down on the counter, picked up a rifle. CRACK! PING! CRACK! PING! CRACK! PING! CRACK! PING!
And while her friends, and the booth owner stared at her, amazed that she had hit all four targets perfectly, she let her gaze wander over the prizes.
"I'd like that plastic dinosaur, please. The stegosaurus." Her voice, calm.
"Ya can have the triceratops too- I never seen shootin like you just done, lady."
"Thank you." (Don'tcry-don'tcrydon't!)

During this transaction, Mal had helped Inara finish the last of the cotton candy. His face was all sticky, hers was unmarred, still flawless.
"Ya got some on ya," he said, rubbing her cheek with his sticky thumb, smearing her pink.
She rolled her eyes. "Well, now I do, yes. Thank you."
"Here- lemme fix it." He leaned close, drew his thumb across her cheek. Closer still, and it was his mouth, sticky and sweet against her cheek. Sweet, but chaste, and so fast she wondered if she had imagined it.
"Let's" she said, brightly, "try the bumper cars!" Where had that idea come from??? (Collision- dancing apart-bodies stop thinking!!!!)
But the line was too long.
"Anyone up for the roller coaster?" Mal asked.
"It looks like a relic from Earth-That-Was," said Zoe, eyeing the structure uneasily.
"Come on- ya can stare down Niska like he's something ya stepped in, but a lil roller coaster scares ya?" Mal teased. "It don't even go upside down!"
"If you wouldn't mind," Inara said "I'd actually like someone to wait here, and hold my...cotton candy." There was hardly enough left on the cone to justify holding.
Zoe managed a tight smile, thanks to the Companion for trying to give her an out. But she shook her head, needled by Mal's teasing. Besides, Wash would have loved to... (stop thinking! Stop it!) "I'll be fine."

They paid their credits and wound up sitting midway down the line of cars. Zoe stared grimly at Mal's head, in front of her, trying to ignore the dizzy whirl as the car gathered speed. As his arm snaked almost nonchalantly around Inara's silky back, Zoe stifled a laugh. As they topped the first rise, Zoe looked around her. Wash would have loved this, being up so high. And for the first time, the thought brought, not aching sadness, but a kind of calm.

Then the ground dropped out from under her. She heard a scream from in front of her. And laughter. Inara was laughing. and Mal was...
Curiously, she felt calm, steadied for the first time since- since the sickening metallic crunch that had ripped through her heart, as completely as it has ripped through her husband's body.
And if there were tears running down her face, they could be the stinging wind, as the roller coaster bucked and plunged under her. She nestled one hand against her stomach. Someday, she'd come back here. And she'd win another dinosaur, or two. She'd tell stories about how Wash would have loved this, would have smiled, would have laughed at being so high up, so close to flight without having to steer them there.

Back on the ground, Zoe watched, as both Mal and Inara stepped gingerly from their car. Inara's face was schooled to be as calm as always, but the calm looked strained. And Mal's face had a distinctly greenish cast to it, as he wobbled out of his roller.

"Nara, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, sorry. I'll get ya a new dress. Or clean that one, or. Ya can shoot me, if ya want to. Ya should. It always makes Patience feel better."

His stammering apologies faded, as he followed Inara, on legs that still wobbled.

"Ya coming?" He turned back to his First Mate, who was reaching outside of the roller-coaster to pay another handful of credits.

"I'll meet you back at the ship," she called, as the roller coaster began its slow, rumbling ascent.

She took a deep breath, and felt a tension deep within her loosening, as the first, free, tears began, at last, to fall.