Meus Amor et Mea Culpa: My Love and My Mistake

The Things We Say
Rei was standing outside of the main building of the school, relishing the quiet of the night and completely unaware of what was about to take place just within the garden of the school. Naturally, of course, such peace just had to be broken by none other than Jaden Aino.

"Evening, Pyro." She turned to glare at him but couldn't help that small smile begin to tug at her lips. As damning as it was, she was actually becoming rapidly attached to this man. He had been hanging around the gang's usual haunts lately, even managing to catch up and joke around with Zachary when the younger man wasn't busy holding hands with Ami nowadays. She couldn't help hanging out with him, and, to be honest with herself, she actually didn't mind. He smiled slyly at her now and leaned back against the same column she was leaning on that supported part of the roof of the school. "Watcha doin' out here? Why aren't you inside?" He asked, nodding his head in the direction of booming music and strobe lights.

Rei shrugged. "I needed a breather. It was getting too hot in there." She replied. "What about you?"

"I couldn't find you anywhere." He grinned. "I wanted to dance with you."

Rei rolled her eyes, exasperated yet flattered all the same. "You're an idiot."

"Because I want to dance with you?" He asked, incredulous. "So guys who want to dance with you are idiots." He reasoned playfully. "Hmm…" He got a mischievous glint in his eye. "So what does that make Kaidou?"

The jovial mood was cut short by the awkward silence that followed. Rei paused, frowning in thought. Now that she really thought about it, Kaidou had never actually asked her to dance. He had always been busy, even at parties. He always had to greet new people, "important dignitaries" he called them before leaving her on her own…

"…He's never asked you before has he?" She looked over at Jaden, who had seemed to read her mind. He had something resembling a sad small on his face. Sad? What? Did he pity her?

Rei glared in annoyance. "We've danced plenty of times." She said haughtily.

Jaden nodded, taking in her reply readily. "I'm sure you have." He said. Rei nodded, affirming this and looked away from him. For some reason, she couldn't bring herself to look at him right now. "But I wonder..." He began thoughtfully. "Exactly how many of those times were because he wanted to. I wonder how many times he only danced with you because your darling daddy ordered him to."

"Hey!" Jaden held up his hands at her protest.

"Don't be like that, Jaden." Rei said harshly, deeply angered at his analogy and the innuendo about Kaidou's intentions. "Kaidou is nothing like my father. He's a great guy. He likes being with me and he loves me."

The last part came out in a rush and she would later wonder what the hell made her say it. Thinking that Jaden would be angry, she was almost surprised to here him chuckle bitterly at her declaration.

"No he doesn't, Rei." He said softly, as if speaking to a crying child. "And you know it, too. And it pisses you off."

Her head swung angrily towards him, violet streaks of hair cutting through the air. "Don't say that." She commanded. "You don't know Kaidou. He cares for me very much."

"Of course he cares for you." Jaden agreed amiably. "He just doesn't love you."

The hand that would've struck his face was stopped within mere inches of his cheek. Rei's momentary surprise lasted for only a split second. Then she attempted to lash out against him with her other hand. He caught her wrist like he had done to the other. With a force that came surprisingly easy for him, Jaden pinned her hands on the column. Before she could even try to struggle, his lips were by her face, his words billowing to her ear.

"Why are you fighting me, Rei? Why? I don't understand. I haven't said anything but I figured I had made my intentions pretty damn clear by now. I'm not like him, Rei. I'm not one of your father's flunkies. I'm here now because I want to be here, not because someone told me to. I don't want anything from you, except just one thing." He pulled back still keeping her face by his. He brushed his lips briefly over her closed ones. "All I want, no, need. All I need from you, Rei, is a chance. Won't you give me that, at least?"

"…"

"Rei…?"

"He loves me."

Rei felt a sick sense of deja vu as she said these words, trying hard to ignore the denial that was beginning to accumulate in her own stomach.

"In that case," He seethed, jerking away from her as if she had burned him. "I give up." He said, throwing up his hands in the air expressively, glaring. "I give up, Rei. Do you wanna know why?"

When he received silence as his answer, Jaden raved on,

"Because I refuse to play second fiddle to a guy that will never see you for the person you are. Never, Rei. He will never think about how sad you really are beneath the surface whenever you think about your father. He will never notice those soft smiles on your face whenever you're thinking about old times. He will never notice how rarely you laugh and he will never understand how beautiful it is when you do.

"And he will never -do you hear me, Rei? - never love you even half as much as I do."

He paused, breathing heavily, eyes glittering with too many clashing emotions within their depths. He dropped his shoulders, emotionally exhausted. He shook his head sadly, closing his eyes in an effort to block out the world, reality, Rei. When he opened them, a dark cloud had settled in those usually bright blue eyes and a bitter smile crept on his face.

"I give up, Rei." He said, shrugging with his palms towards her. "I have nothing left to give. I'm done."

With that, he turned, walking away, bidding the raging feelings in him to pacify themselves before he turned on his heels to physically shake some sense into the woman.

"He loves me." The words were out of her mouth before she could think twice. They came out strong in the silence that engulfed them and Rei could feel the ache of denial slowly chewing on her insides. Jaden stopped walking, his back still turned to her. After a moment, he let out a soft scoff and turned his head at an angle where she still couldn't see his face and he was unwilling to look at hers.

"Then I guess you're an even bigger idiot than me."

Maybe Rei was too angry to reply. Maybe she was just really really shocked at the blatant verbal attack. Or maybe it was the reality that he was more than likely right. But, in any case, Rei did not reply. And as she stood there, gazing at him dumbly with dull eyes, her soul screamed at her brain to do something. Anything. But she didn't. No, Rei stayed where she stood, watching the blonde Adonis stalk over to his car, flinging the door open and slipping in before slamming it shut. The slam reverberated into her brain, adding to the shock that was accumulating that would not permit her to even wince or call out to him to stop.

"He loves me."

The words were echoing through her mind and she finally recalled why the words were so horribly familiar. She could recall Catherine, her second cousin, in her mind, wearing that bright pink dress at the party so many nights ago when she and Jaden had shared their first kiss. She could hear Cat's shaky voice say those same, nauseating words of defiance.

"He loves me, Rei."

It was then Rei realized that her own words to Jaden held even less confidence that Cat's own declaration that night about her fiancé, Ruben Van Buren.

By the time any of her sense had kicked in, Rei was inhaling the dust that had been kicked up by Jaden's back tires in his fervent effort to escape her presence.

Serena was missing. Lita had first ignored that little detail; she figured Serena was lost in the sea of gowns and masks, enjoying herself. However, when Serena had been out of her sight for around ten minutes, Lita's curiosity and worry began nagging at her. It was silly to get worried, Lita reasoned. After all, Serena wouldn't leave the school grounds for any reason and, after all, what possible danger could there be for the girl at the dance?

Nevertheless, as a slow song began to play and several single people walked off the dance floor, leaving behind only couples, Lita looked around her calculatingly, seeking out that halo of silver-blonde that she could always attribute to Serena. Technically speaking, she did manage to spot a head of silver-blonde hair, but that belonged to Kunthan, Serena's older brother, who was (surprisingly not awkwardly) dancing on the floor with Mina, who hadn't left his side since he first came. Not that Kunthan was complaining, mind you.

Speaking of complainers, Lita could see Ami and Zach not too far away, a bright smile on Zach's face as he gently tugged a red-faced Ami into a loose embrace. The hug was made firm seconds later as the two slow danced and Lita couldn't help but smile as she watched Zach whisper something to Ami; Lita could've sworn she heard Ami's sweet laugh from across the room, despite the booming music.

Rei had disappeared a while ago to God knows where… and so had Jaden apparently. Hmmm…everyone seemed to be hooking up, Lita noted, trying to ignore that twist in her gut that accompanied Nicholas Anza's face in her mind's eye. Desperate to distract herself from the feelings welling within her toward the man who had unexpectedly entered her life and, in a matter of months, turned it upside down. Oh, the fates were truly very cruel.

Sighing, the Amazonian brunette discretely stepped outside for the auditorium, using the exit that led to the gardens of the Academy. Exotic trees and flowers of every color shape and size were everywhere, specially imported by the owners of New Moon Academy. She liked coming here, the smell of flowers and their colors always comforted her and gave her a sense of peace. That peace, however, was currently being disrupted. Her mouth twitched in slight annoyance as she could faintly make out voices nearby, one male, one female, a couple most likely, arguing with each other. Lita shook her head. What drama. However, as she turned to leave, Lita heard a very familiar voice. Could it be…? Nah. What would she be doing out here? Maneuvering herself on the pathway of the garden, Lita tried to pinpoint the source of the angry voices through the artificial forest of imported foliage.

"Hello Mamoru." Serena said coolly. Her azure eyes had frosted over, concealing whatever raging emotion was running through her mind. She cocked her golden head to one side mockingly. "Or is it Darien now?"

Her rhetorical question was greeted with that cynical smirk. Deja vu overwhelmed her. It was the same smirk he had given her when they had first met; the smirk of someone who knew something that he wasn't supposed to. Anger welled within her at the thought. She now understood what he knew when they had first met.

Bastard

"Bastard." The title left her mouth without any remorse. Serena had always prided herself in telling the truth when it was needed. And boy, was it need now.

"Now, now Serena." He replied in a sing-song voice, stressing the name. "You can't possibly think so lowly of me, now can you?" The smirk was still in place. God, how she wanted to wipe it off his smug face.

"I thought I made my feelings toward you pretty clear when I moved to another continent." Serena said, shocking herself at the calmness in her voice. The smirk faltered and Serena did a mini-mental cheer in the back of her mind.

He mock-scoffed. "You wound me."

"You deserve it." The lines were familiar. Yet, this time, she meant every word of it. Granted, she doubted that her words would have any effect on the asshole but she figured such a verbal beating was way overdue. "The truth hurts, doesn't it?"

His low chuckle had her clenching her fists even tighter around the rose's stem in her hand. "You know, Usagi," He said, reverting back to the name he had first known her as. "I think your words would actually hurt me, that is, if I didn't see the irony of what a hypocrite you're being."

"'A hypocrite'?" Serena repeated. She had hoped that she sounded vague; bonus points for her if she followed through with sounding confused, too. "Last time I checked, Mamoru, a hypocrite was someone who says one thing and does another, someone who lies about his intentions." His name was said with more disgust than she actually had for him. She was glad. If only he knew of the true raging bitterness screaming at her from inside. "Quite frankly, you're the only hypocrite present here, aside from four certain individuals no doubt lurking around us." She said that last part loudly, knowing that they could all hear her, knowing that they could sense the anger in her voice. A semi-maniacal grin settled on her features as she continued. "Props to you, Naru. No doubt, you were the ring leader behind all this. Oh, I'm sure you helped too, Alan. Being a tycoon's son does have its advantages, I see. It must've taken you a lot of connections to find that number for my home here. Of course, my uncle has several connections of his own. I'm sure you encountered them while you were trying to find me." The bitter grin spread and opened to a cold laugh. "I'm sure they put you guys went through one hell of a goose chase."

Anyone who entered the scene would've thought the young woman was insane, yelling out into the night at seemingly invisible people. No one would've noticed the shadows that hid in the shadows, or the silent, abrupt movements made when something the golden girl insinuated truly irked them. No, they maintained their positions, like good soldiers waiting for their commander, hungry eyes watching the scene unfolding before them, all wanting to take his place.

The smirk had faded away now, she was satisfied to see. However, she also knew what it meant. He was done trying her patience; his had run out.

"Whatever." He said dismissively, rolling his eyes and looking away from her. "There are some things that we need to discuss."

Serena's absolute anger at this jerk was almost to its boiling point. How dare he reenter her life with such loftiness and expect them to talk to each other with decency. Of course, she somewhat surprised herself at how well she was managing the situation. Especially when she had half the mind to scratch his eyes out.

"Whatever needed discussing has been dealt with." She said with finality. "Everything either of us had to say to the other was settled before I left."

"And before I knew you were leaving." He snapped at her. Serena thought, had she currently been as weak and stupid as she had been over a year ago, she might've mistaken that faint glimmer in his eyes as some kind of evidence for an emotion. But, of course, she knew better now. The flicker of feeling was gone before it even sparked and she took an involuntary step back. A dark shadow had come over his face while something akin to the fire of a thousand suns burned in his eyes, scorching her with his gaze. "Of course, I didn't realize a lot of things until after you had left."

The reality of his innuendo struck her hard. She doubted he would really come all this way just for her. He knew what had happened after she left Japan and he seemed to be ready to use it against her. Yet his taunting words had opened up floodgates that were brought down in order to close up the gashing wounds he had left on her; floodgates that she had no intention of blocking up now that they were opened.

"And what exactly did you realize after I left, Mamoru?" She questioned slyly, eyes narrowing to betray her anger. "That you were an asshole? A deceitful bastard only out for himself and his stupid money?" She spat. "Or, maybe, you had the miraculous epiphany that human beings are susceptible to pain. Of course you couldn't have known about that, especially when you're so above everyone it's disgusting." Sarcasm dripped off every word to leave her small mouth. They were her venom, her poison that had been cultivated in her heart, finally being released upon the one individual who deserved them.

And her poison stung, she could see. Perhaps an untrained eye would not have noticed the way his hand flinched momentarily or the small spasm of an unnamed emotion that passed his face. But she did. She saw because she had inflicted that damage, but obviously on a much smaller scale than the damage he had done to her.

"Your anger is justified," The young man finally said after a moment. The dangerous glint was still in place. "But your hatred for me cannot possibly excuse your deception!"

He knew that she understood what he was talking about. However, her lip curled into an un-mannerly snarl.

"An eye for an eye." She quoted wisely. "Think of what I did as mere reimbursement for what you've done to me. Don't speak of deception so lowly when you've already pulled off such a great example of it."

"Shut up!" The shadows in the dark groaned mentally, one of them aloud. She always did have a wonderful habit of pushing his buttons. An arm shot out and gripped hers before anyone, let alone the warning voices in his head, could stop him. "Shut up, Usagi! Stop playing dumb! You know what I'm talking about! Where-?"

Serena didn't have to struggle long for it suddenly seemed like a nearby bush had leapt to life, striking out with balled fists. With a sudden cry, he lost his grip almost immediately.

'Damn. The man sure has one very thick head.' Lita thought darkly, watching him stumble back a few paces while she rubbed her knuckles lightly. She absently shooed off the stray pieces of leaves that had accumulated onto her dress as she had hidden behind the bushes, watching the encounter between this apparent lunatic and her friend. Speaking of whom…Lita turned. Serena was shaking slightly, obviously shocked.

"Serena..." Lita began hesitantly. She knew that, once she jumped out from her hiding place, Lita had just basically admitted to eavesdropping. But after seeing how this asshole was speaking to her friend and Serena's reaction to him, Lita's anger became centered around her fist once she saw him actually try to physically harm Serena. Now, she focused on the main reason she even stepped in. She almost gulped.

The pig head was now surrounded by four other people, two girls and two guys, all dressed up like they belonged in the party. None looked too happy at her sudden appearance. Her pretty lips twisted into a menacing snarl and her eyes became emerald slits behind her mask as she tensed her entire body to defend her friend from these weirdos. However, she never got the chance.

Kunthan, too, had become worried when his sister's disappearance extended to a point past comfortable. Granted, he had allowed himself to be distracted for a period of time with Mina on the dance floor, but, eventually, he began to worry. Supportive and equally curious, Mina had stayed by his side, helping to scan the crowd for any trace of Serena. When they were sure that she was neither in the room or the bathroom, they went outside. The two had barely any time to admire the gardens, flowers glowing under the blinking stars. Close by, very close by, as they could discern from the rising voices, was an argument taking place. Both of their ears perked up at the sound of Serena's voice. However, Kunthan seemed to freeze when he heard a masculine voice reply to his sister's apparent shrieks of accusation. Mina turned to him to say something but the words were left frozen on her lips when she looked at her companion.

His forehead was furrowed in a deep scowl, his eyes turning almost crystalline in rage. Before she could ask what was wrong, Kunthan was striding away from her, leaving her to pick up her dress and attempt to follow him. Faraway, they heard the thumping of something hitting the ground, hard. The two exchanged a worried glance for a split second then hurried up. The scene they arrived to wasn't a very fun one.

"You…" Kunthan hissed, his vision turning red at the direction of the group of intruders. However, his anger was focused on him. That lying scumbag. His knuckles were turning as white as his hair as he managed to maintain a steady voice level, demanding, "What the fucking hell are you assholes doing here?"

The tall blonde of the group stepped forward, pulling away at his mask to reveal dark blue eyes that seemed to be constantly teasing, despite the hard grim line of his mouth. "Good evening to you, too, Kunthan."

"Fuck off, Alan." Kunthan spat. "We're through with your shit so get the hell out of here."

One of the girls stepped forward, her voice trying to soothe.

"Kunthan, please-"

"Not one goddamned word from you, Naru." Serena commanded from her position. "You've said all you've ever needed to say to me."

"Our business is done with you." Kunthan said, his voice wavering with anger. "Leave."

"Gladly." The man named Darien seethed, pulling away from the group to glare at Kunthan. "As soon as she answers a couple of questions."

Serena scoffed. "I have nothing to say to you."

"That's what you'd like us to think, isn't it?" Darien said rhetorically.

Serena sneer. "I think all that money has gone to your heads." She said blithely, looking around at all of them gathered before her. "You've all lost it."

"Hey!" a tall man with dark chocolate hair stepped forward, piercing gray eyes glaring and pleading simultaneously with the angry siblings. "Enough with the insults."

"Shut up, Umino." Lita glanced at Serena, surprised. So much animosity was practically radiating from the girl. It was nothing like Lita had ever seen before. Serena almost snarled. "You call them insults. I call it the truth. Just because you finally decided to grow a conscience doesn't undue what you did."

"You didn't even let us explain-" The other girl took off her own mask, revealing the all-too familiar face Serena had once loved and now loathed.

"There was nothing to explain, Anne. You betrayed me." Serena cut in plainly, voice quavering. "I trusted you, all of you." She glanced at all of them, her gaze reflecting the hurt they had inflicted on her as cast a meaningful look at Darien. "I loved you all and you all lied to me. And for what? Money!" She laughed mockingly. "And here I thought you were better than that." Her voice quieted to a defeated tone. "Obviously, I was wrong.

"Leave us alone." She said after a moment's silence. "Just go away. You have no reason to be here."

"You know damn well why we're here Serena," Darien seethed, bringing back the attention to him. Serena's lips turned into a grim line, as if holding back a biting comment. Darien's eyes narrowed and it was as if all his patience had run out. "So why don't you just cut the bullshit and tell me where he is. Tell me Serena! Where is he?

"Tell me where my son is!"

A/N: Cliffhangers are a beautiful thing. So review and let me know if you're still alive. I'm still going to write anyways but reviews help to motivate. Go figure. See ya.

chickay