Moonlight Reflections

Mimi drifted aimlessly around the room, champagne flute in one hand. What was she doing here? Why had she come back? There was nothing here for her. She'd thought that maybe there might be... but she'd been wrong.

She wandered out onto the balcony. Resting her hands lightly on the railing, she looked out across the city. So many memories.

She and Matt had never really spoken before they went to the Digiworld. She had seen him around the neighbourhood and the school, but had never thought to look twice at him. She'd had her group of friends, and he'd had his. The most they'd spoken was when he was playing in the band for the school musical, and she'd been playing one of the lead roles. And that was just about the weather.

But the unforgettable adventure in the Digiworld changed all that. They became great friends. They could talk about anything and everything. Nobody could believe that the lone wolf and the social butterfly were so inseparable, but they were. Maybe it was their differences that made them so close? All Mimi knew was that Matt was quiet and thoughtful, and she could trust him with her life and he would never let her down. Similarly, Matt knew that Mimi was the most fun person to be around, and possibly the only person on the planet who could make him enthusiastic about anything. And there never was a better listener, once she calmed down.

She wasn't sure when those feelings of friendship started deepening into something more. But suddenly she started seeing him in a different light. He was an excellent friend, but there was something else about him too. She started noticing all the different colours in the blue of his eyes. Every word he said went straight to her heart, as if it bypassed her ears. The slightest thing he did could make her smile.

It took her quite a long time to realise this feeling was love.

Luckily for her, her feelings for Matt were fully reciprocated. He loved her with all his heart. They started dating when they were about twelve. Most people didn't believe that what they felt was love – but they both knew differently. Age didn't matter.

Or, they thought they knew differently.

Then, typically, something had to happen to ruin her happiness. Her father had to move to America for his work. Something about a business franchise, or maybe a relocating sector. She didn't know. She didn't care. All it meant to her was that she was being ripped from the one she truly loved most. Nothing in this world is fair.

So she packed up and shipped off. Sure, she still talked to him on the phone all the time. Phone bills were just part of her parents' punishment for removing her from her happy life in Odaiba. But it was never the same.

Still, her mother had what Mimi liked to call her Tea Party Friends. They lived back in Japan, and she often flew out to see them. Mimi didn't care much what her mother and father did, except for when she was allowed to go back with them. It meant that every few months, she was able to see Matt again. It wasn't right, but it was as close as they could get.

She would spend the four or five days that each visit consisted of practically attached to him. They had to take advantage of the time they had. It was precious. If she arrived during his school term, he would fake illness to be with her. If he were supposed to have band practise, he would reschedule. He put his life on hold for her. They spent the time talking, and kissing, and talking more. As they grew older they explored certain things further than kissing. "I love you" was thrown around so often that Mimi and Matt were surprised if ten minutes went by without it being said.

Then one visit everything went as wrong as things could go. It was against her parents' wishes. They thought that she spent too much time in transit between Japan and America. They recommended she settle down and find herself a nice American boyfriend, and forget all about that Matt Ishida. This had angered Mimi beyond all rationality. In a rage, she had left the house and jumped on a plane. Looking back, Mimi supposed the trip was ill fated from the very start.

Mimi was twenty, Matt had just had his twenty-first birthday. Mimi had flown out to celebrate it with him. She had been a part of the huge surprise party that Tai and Sora had organised for him. That was when Tai and Sora were still together.

She could remember that party as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. It had been at Matt's house. Tai had taken him out for a few birthday drinks, and while they were out, all of Matt's friends had piled into his house. There were balloons and streamers and a cake the size of a coffee table. There was laughing and drinking and dancing. Tai's speech was something that to the day scarred her mind.

Mimi would never forget the look on his face as he walked through the door and they all yelled surprise. She would never forget how for the entire length of that party he had only had eyes for her.

She would never forget how Sora had left with Tai, leaving her without a ride or a place to stay the night. She would never forget the choices she made that night. She could have taken a taxi to a hotel. She could have called Kari or Yolei and asked to stay with them. She could have refused Matt's offer to stay with him that night. She could have refused his offer to see his new guitar, which lived in his bedroom.

She could have stopped at kissing and fondling. But that night, in Matt's bedroom, on his king-size bed with the blue quilt, she let Matt show her something more. Maybe it was the alcohol that made them make that choice. Maybe it was that they were still carried away by the excitement of the night. But whatever it was, it had left Mimi with a constant reminder.

Jamie.

Another day she would never forget was the day she found out she was pregnant. She had been seven weeks late. She was usually so regular. So she had visited her doctor. Blood was taken for testing. Three days later the doctor called her. She had wanted Mimi to come in to see her.

Mimi remembered that doctor's office as clear as day. It smelled a little like pine disinfectant. It was a pale yellow and white. The desk had three folders on it, and a box of tissues. The box of tissues has pictures of fluffy baby ducks on it. She remembered having to visit the bathroom to throw up she was so nervous. She didn't know at the time that this was partially due to morning sickness. She remembered sitting in the chair, in a daze, as the doctor told her the news.

"Mimi… you're pregnant."

Three words that shattered her world. Mimi felt as if she was on a cloud as everything crumbled away from her. Of course, deep down she had already known this. But to have it said to her sent her into a whirlwind of confusion and chaos. What was she going to do now?

She had hoped to get some help from Matt. He was the father, of course. But naturally, things couldn't happen that easily for her. When she had told Matt she was pregnant, the strangest look had passed over his face. One of sadness, pain and anger all mixed up together. Then he had turned away from her.

Seconds of silence had melted into minutes. Maybe even hours. They felt like hours to Mimi. Finally he turned back to face her.

"Mimi… I… I… maybe we shouldn't see each other any more. I'm… sorry."

Mimi remembered the sight of his back as he left her standing there. Alone. She fought back tears as she vowed to be a great mother without him. She would show him.

She hadn't gone back to Odaiba after that. She had received an invitation to Matt and Sora's wedding, but in a fit of sadness and rage she had torn it into little pieces and burned them. Besides, women in their third trimester weren't supposed to fly.

She still talked to Tai, Kari, Izzy and Joe on the phone regularly. When Kari came over to New York once for her photography, Mimi had spent a week with her. Occasionally Mimi even talked to TK. The way she reasoned it, it wasn't his fault that he was the younger brother to the greatest scum of the universe. You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family. And every time he spoke to her he spent the first ten minutes apologising for his brother's insensitivity. Mimi heard her unfavourable relations with Matt had been the cause of a rather large split in the Takashi-Ishida family.

But for some reason the whole situation had become quite obsolete. Naturally the scandal had reached its peak just as Sora and Matt were married, and Mimi was just about to give birth. Matt was quite the unpopular one. Sora too, but to a lesser extent. They were shunned. They were no longer accepted as true digi-destineds. Mimi, while not happy about this, was certainly not sad either. Matt deserved everything that came to him. And Sora was almost as bad. Stealing Matt just as soon as he was free. Her supposed best friend was just waiting for him. Mimi had trusted her with everything. She had told Sora first. Before even telling her parents. Still, it wasn't her fault Matt had become suddenly available.

Mimi would never forgive him for what he did to her and her unborn child. Ever.

Pausing momentarily to breathe in the cool, dark air, she turned to return to the reunion. Then she saw him. Blocking the exit was the man she least wanted to face. Matt. He moved aside, walking to one of the silvery chairs that sat out greeting the moon. She was free. She could go inside. She could get away from him.

So why wasn't she?

"So. Married to Sora, hey?" she asked, sitting in the matching chair.

"Yeah." He replied. He didn't face her. He couldn't look her in the eyes. She was back. And at the worst possible time. Why was fate so determined to screw his life up?

"Mind if I ask why?" Mimi probed his soul, looking for answers. She watched his profile as he stared out across the city lights. Turning her head she watched them too. They were so lovely as they danced in her eyes. She had forgotten how entranced she had been by them as a child.

Matt summoned up all his courage in order to answer as truthfully as he could. He owed her that much. "I got her pregnant. I didn't want the kid to have a childhood like mine. It's not fair."

"What?" Mimi asked. She was trying her hardest not to start shaking in a mix of anger, confusion and sadness.

Matt could tell there was something wrong. She was still calm, but it was a forced calm. He knew from the icy edge in that one word she had spoken. "Her child needed a dad." He replied.

This was the last straw for Mimi. She gave up all pretence of normality and said, her voice ringing with incredulity, "And mine didn't? Let me get this straight. You found out that I was pregnant, left me, hooked up with Sora and got her pregnant, then married her?"

Matt didn't know what to say, other than, "Yeah."

Mimi was taken aback by his honesty. She was expecting some hasty reasoning, an attempt at explaining the situation. But there was none. She looked down at her one of a kind, ridiculously expensive diamante studded pink stilettos. "So... why did you leave me?"

Matt finally turned to look at her. A strand of chestnut blonde hair curled down alongside her face as she stared at her feet. Damn, she was beautiful. "I did it for you. I thought I'd let perfect you and perfect Michael go off to have your perfect kid and live your perfect life together. You know, happily ever after. Without me as a complication."

Mimi blinked a few times, not sure if she had heard right. "What did you just say?"

Matt was confused. "Without me as a complication?"

Mimi shook her head. "No. Before that. Did you just say Michael was my child's father?"

Matt was even more confused. What was her point? Where was she going with this? "Yeah. So?"

Mimi inhaled deeply. He really didn't know. How could he not know? How was it physically possible? Everybody else knew, didn't they? How could he not? Even after all these years, how could he not? "Matt... Michael's gay. Didn't the perm tip you off? Him and his boyfriend Brian have been together for two years. Michael is my shopping partner. Nothing more."

Matt felt as if a bucket of icy water had been thrown at his face. This was a pretty major wake up call. All this time... all this time spent hating Michael for no reason. All this time spent in agony over setting Mimi free. But if Michael wasn't the father... "Then who is Jamie's dad?"

Mimi looked up at the stars. Through the clear night they seemed to wink at her. Twinkle, twinkle little star. "Matt," she whispered to nobody, her words drifting into the night. "My first. And only."

Matt couldn't speak or even move. A baseball bat could not have hit him harder than those five words. A bullet couldn't have pierced his skin with more viciousness. The verbal weapon spiralled straight to his heart. "You mean... I am the kid's father?" his voice was strained, unbelieving. "But we – I mean – one time!"

Mimi gave a half-hearted laugh. All those PE lessons he'd skipped were coming back to bite him in the butt. "Once is all it takes, hon."

This changed everything. All that had once been stable and secure was now being tossed in a whirlwind of turmoil. Matt's whole world was coming crashing down around his feet. What was he going to do now? What the hell was he supposed to do now?

"Um... I'm... sorry. Really Mimi. I never would have left if I'd known. Not to leave you to take care of a newborn by yourself. I only did what I thought was best for you. What I thought you wanted."

That's the only reason I do anything.

Mimi wanted to scream at him. Make him feel all the hurt she had been feeling for the last three years. But she couldn't. Something was holding her tongue in her mouth. And deep down, she knew what it was. She still had feelings for him.

"You didn't know." Was all she replied.

Matt was silent for a moment as he thought. What was going to happen now? "What do you want me to do now?"

"Haven't you done enough?" Mimi's tone was caustic and bitter. Nobody could have guessed that she was struggling so hard to keep her calm exterior about her. Nobody could have guessed that on the inside all she wanted to do was break down and cry.

"Mimi, I've done a lot of things in my life that I ain't proud of, but running away from my mistakes is not one of them. Let me help you Mimi. Tell me what you want me to do."

Mimi heard the change in his voice. He was giving up his pretences. She decided to drop hers too. Stop pretending not to care, and show how she really felt. "I know, Matt. You are a good person, deep down. But what can you do? Everything is... hopeless."

With that one last whispered word, Mimi stood. She turned from Matt and went back inside, intent on finding the open bar. What had happened to her champagne anyway?

Matt put his head in his hands and sighed. "Oh, Mimi… I'm so sorry."

What did you think? I decided you needed to know now why Mimi hated Matt so much, so this was pretty much just a flashback chappy.

Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.