Disclaimer: You already know I do not own Digimon, but I also do not own Something Corporate, or their song The Astronaut, which is quoted at the bottom of this chapter. Don't sue. You won't get anything worth having. I really, really wish I did though. Seriously, Something Corporate is fantastic and I'd recommend any of their stuff to anyone.

Some Things Never Die

Mimi pulled her little silver car up at the address Matt had given over the phone. She'd taken a cab to the hotel where the reunion had been held, and fetched the car that she'd been too drunk to drive the night before. Now, huge, fancy metal gates faced her. Probably built to keep out the screaming fans. A small smile crossed Mimi's tense face at the thought of teenage girls accosting Matt, ripping him to little rock star shreds. Okay, so she was maybe a little bitter.

She reached out of the window and pressed the buzzer, alerting whoever was in the mansion at the end of the driveway to her presence. Figures. He and Sora get a three-storey mansion with perfectly manicured lawns and gardens, and she gets a two-bedroom house in the American suburbs, and a little apartment here in Japan. Life was never meant to be fair.

A small creak signalled the opening of the gates, and Mimi steered the car in. She wasn't sure if it was the gate to Heaven or Hell that she was passing through, but she expected to find out soon enough. Checking in her rear vision mirror, she could see Jamie in his child seat in the back, curiously looking out the window. She parked, let Jamie out, and then beeped the car locked. Taking a deep breath and grasping Jamie's hand tightly in hers, she approached the front door with the air of someone bravely walking forward to their execution.

The driveway seemed longer with each step she took, as if this torture might never end. But, what seemed like hours after she had left her car, she finally arrived at the front door. Her hand reached up and pressed the doorbell. She didn't remember telling it to. She just watched it with a kind of detached bemusement. She heard chimes playing Greensleeves somewhere deep in the huge house, but it was as if in a daze. She could not believe she was doing this.

Out of nowhere, little padding sounds told her that someone was about to open the door. Oh, God, what was she getting herself into?

Matt opened the door, and Mimi had to bite her bottom lip hard to stop herself sucking in her breath. He was so handsome. So terribly, wonderfully handsome. She'd dressed carefully, in her nicest fluttery pink skirt and white top, and the most tasteful hint of make up, but she still felt inadequate in comparison. He was dressed in long baggy jeans and an expensive green silk shirt with the top three buttons undone. His naked chest matched his bare feet. His hair was freshly washed and gleaming, flicking out around his face. His deep azure blue eyes snapped and sparkled at the sight of her. His mouth was turned up into the merest glimmer of the smile that blazed in his eyes. What she'd give to kiss that mouth, just one more time.

Matt could only stare at the woman in front of him. If only the years that had passed had lessened her charm, maybe then he would have been able to let her go. But, no such luck. The years had made her sadder and more subdued, but had left her with an elegance he'd never seen before in anyone. Before, she had always been a rose. Pretty, flashy, bubbly, and always the centre of attention. Now she was one of those tall white lilies. Pure, exquisite, aloof, and truly beautiful. The way her hair fell, the way her lips smiled her sad smile, the way her eyes always seemed to see something other than what was there. It made his heart ache.

Mimi could have happily stayed there all day, living in this world of memories and joy, only her and Matt. The way things always used to be. But a tickling sensation at the back of her left knee brought her back to reality. Jamie was hiding behind Mimi's legs, scared of this new man. Scared of the power he seemed to have over his mother. Matt appeared to notice, and bent down to the child's level.

"Hey big guy! My name's Matt," he introduced himself. "You must be Jamie."

Still clutching Mimi around the knees, Jamie peered out a little way from behind them and nodded uncertainly. How did this man know his name?

"How old are you?" Matt feigned interest, despite knowing full well how old this child was. "Twenty-seven? Twenty-eight maybe?"

A very little smile crept onto Jamie's face as he shook his head. This man was silly. He held up two of his small fingers. "No, I'm this many!" He readjusted so that three fingers were showing. "Almost this many, Mummy says."

Matt pretended to start in surprise. "But you're so big! And so handsome! I thought you were Mimi's new date!"

The smile grew a little bigger. Matt could see the front few teeth. But he still wasn't satisfied, so he tried even harder.

"Do you want to see a magic trick?"

Nodding furiously, Jamie watched intently as Matt pulled a twenty-cent piece from behind his ear. Success! Jamie's smile spread from ear to ear. Matt winked at Mimi.

"My kid always loves that one too." Turning back to Jamie, he added. "Why don't you come out now?"

Jamie slowly emerged from behind his mother's legs. Matt did a double take, and looked distinctly uneasy. Mimi knew why, of course. James was a miniaturised replica of Matt. He had the same thick spiky blonde hair, the same deep sapphire eyes. He sometimes even got the same cheeky Ishida look that she remembered from Matt's youth. Mimi had often cursed that fact. The memories relived each time she looked into her son's eyes. A living reminder. Quickly recovering from his shock, Matt grinned at the boy. Standing up again, he ruffled Jamie's hair good-naturedly as he spoke.

"Why don't you go inside and find Ben. You two can play with his toys. Do you like… trucks?"

"And trains?" Jamie asked hopefully.

Laughing out loud, Matt replied, "Of course. Go on."

Jamie skittered off inside, leaving Mimi alone with Matt. After a few minutes of awkward silence, Mimi spoke up.

"You're good with kids."

Matt pushed his hair out of his eyes, hoping she couldn't see in his face how hard he had just fought for that child's approval. "Thanks."

Mimi couldn't resist. She tried biting her tongue, but it was creeping out anyways. It had to be said. "Sure would have been great if you'd been there from the start. Jamie needs a dad."

Matt's arms dropped lifelessly to his sides. "Come on, Mi. That isn't fair. I'm trying to make up for it now, aren't I?"

She saw his point, and she almost believed him. But for her son, she kept fighting this. "A part time father isn't right."

Anger welled up inside Matt. She was being unreasonable. "Well it's the best I can do." He replied, annoyed.

Mimi looked at her feet. It was true. It was the best he could do. It would be wrong of her to expect him to leave Sora and start things up with her again. Though, the look he had given her when he had first opened the door had almost made that seem like a possibility. And when she looked deep inside herself, she couldn't deny that was what she really wanted. Her child came first; it should have first priority. But, of course, things never worked like that. It was thoroughly depressing.

"Yeah. Maybe it is." She replied sadly.

Matt's heart shattered at her defeatist tone. If she only asked him to leave Sora, he would do it. He would do anything for her. He didn't care if it left him with nothing, so long as she was happy.

"Anyway, do you want to come inside?" He asked.

"Sure."

Mimi wandered into Matt's home. However big it looked from the outside, it seemed three times that on the inside. Expensive furniture was artistically arranged across the ankle-thick carpeting, and equally expensive paintings lined the walls. Practically priceless porcelain vases and ornaments stood precariously over just about anything that stood still. Mimi wondered how Sora dared to put them there when she had a two-year-old running around just like she did.

Speaking of whom, Jamie came running up to her, happiness scrawled blatantly across his young face. Next to him was another small boy of about the same build, with a shock of red hair and those typical Ishida eyes. What amused Mimi most was that they were wearing exactly the same shoes.

"Mummy! This is Ben! He likes trains and cartoons and – and – and candy too!" Her son was almost bursting with enthusiasm.

Mimi never thought she'd see the day when her son was playing with this boy. His half brother. The cause of so many problems. But she forced a smile to her face. "That's great! Why don't you guys go play then?"

Coming up behind Mimi, Matt addressed his son. "Yeah. Go on, Big Ben, how about you show Jamie your room?"

Ben nodded furiously. He was evidently one of those eager-to-please children. Must have got that from his mother, as there was little to no evidence of it in Jamie. "Okay Dad!" he said, before signalling in some kind of kid code to Jamie, and running off.

Before leaving to follow Ben, Jamie pulled his mum to his level so that he could whisper in her ear with a certain amount of secrecy.

"I like this man, Mummy." He said. "He could be my Daddy!"

Then he gave Mimi what she could have sworn was a conspiratorial wink, and scurried off after Ben. Mimi could have laughed at the irony. If only he knew, she thought. If only he knew. She could still feel Matt's presence behind her, and she had a sudden desperate and irrational desire for him to wrap his arms around her the way he once did.

But he didn't. All he did was ask, "Would you like something to drink? Tea, coffee, something cool?"

The pain of her longing made her want to cry out. But she had become quite talented at keeping her true emotions concealed. "Tea, thanks, if you don't mind."

She followed him to the kitchen and watched him set the kettle on, pull out two teacups and the teapot, and a jar of loose tea. Everything he did was so deliberate, so calculated. She wondered how he made something as simple and everyday as pouring hot water from the jug into the pot so sensual. Maybe it was just that she wanted him so badly. She wondered if he could possibly feel the same.

He did. His hands were shaking so badly with the wish to touch her, to caress her silky skin, that making the tea was almost impossible. She was so close. So close and yet so unreachably far away. The pain was almost tearing him in two. He finally finished making the tea, and passed her a cup.

"White, one sugar, if I remember correctly." He stated as she took it.

Nodding, she brought it to her lips. It was undeniable; he made good tea. Some special blend, she supposed. Bringing the cup back down to rest on the saucer in her other hand, she noticed Matt watching her intently. Upon being caught out, he quickly took a sip of his tea and asked, in a slightly higher voice than usual,

"Do you want to go out onto the patio? It has a beautiful view of the mountains…"

"I suppose so." She replied simply.

Both of them had forgotten that she had only come around today to get her lost purse. Something else was rekindling, and accessories no longer seemed important to Mimi. She followed him out a sliding glass door and onto a wooden patio that had been built off the side off the house. The ground sloped down steeply away from the house, so the patio almost served as a balcony. She looked out. He was right, the view was breathtaking. She figured that this view would have made this mansion even more expensive. Great land always made a difference. Setting her cup and saucer down carefully on the railing along the front of the patio porch, she turned to Matt, who was now beside her.

"Where's Sora?" she asked, making small talk. She didn't much care where Sora was, so long as she was not there with them.

"Tennis camp. Instructing. Away for three weeks." Mimi could have been imagining it, but she thought that he sounded almost happy at this news.

"Oh… does she do that often? Go away, I mean." Mimi couldn't conceal the small glimmer of hope that perhaps their marriage wasn't working too well. It would be a kind of justice to her.

"Yeah… I guess so." He sounded flippant, uncaring. "At this time of year it's more often. Tennis season. Sometimes she'll be gone for a month or more."

Mimi was sure she hadn't imagined the light tone he'd used in that statement. But really, she thought, why should she dance around it? When he'd walked out on her he had opened himself up for her thorough and complete invasion into his privacy. It was her right. Yeah. Why shouldn't she just ask?

"Matt?"

"Yeah Mimi?" He'd replied quickly. That was a good sign. Made it seem like he wanted to answer her questions. Or was interested in what she had to say. Or both.

In the end, she just had to blurt it out. "Are you happy with Sora?"

Matt bit his lip. He so badly wanted to tell her. But he felt like he was betraying Sora. She'd always been his friend. And now she was his wife. For bad or worse. But this was Mimi. Mimi of the dancing, blissful days of his youth. How could he lie to her? He stalled for time.

"How do you expect me to answer that?"

Mimi turned to him and looked deep into his eyes, sure she'd find salvation there. "Truthfully."

Entranced by her melted honey orbs, he replied, "Truthfully, no. I'm not. And I don't think she is either. We don't love each other. She isn't right for me. She demands affection and attention, and she doesn't know why I can't give it to her. I really did try to, but I just couldn't. We haven't slept together since our wedding night, and we haven't shared a bed in over a year. It isn't working. We both put so much effort into making it seem like it does, but it doesn't. We weren't… meant to be."

Mimi didn't know what to say. She just looked down and began wiping at a lipstick stain on the teacup.

Matt grinned. "Got a bit more than you bargained for, hey Mi?"

Mimi couldn't reply. It was what she had wanted to hear so badly for so long. But now she didn't know where to go from here. She didn't know what to say or how to act. What she desperately wanted to do was kiss him, let out the years of burning passion, tell him to abandon Sora and come and be happy with her. But she couldn't do that. It was socially unacceptable, and moreover, it was intolerable to her sense of pride. She was not going to beg for any man.

She stayed silently playing with her nearly empty teacup until Matt restarted a new thread of conversation.

"So… how long are you in Japan for?" He was trying to make his voice level, as if he was just making an idle comment. Mimi's people skills told her differently. She knew he cared.

"How long is a piece of string?" Mimi replied casually. Let him squirm for a while. Maybe if she kept him frustrated for long enough he would just come out and say he wanted her to stay. Say he wanted her back.

But she was out of luck. "You're a real fountain of information," was all he said, sounding mildly irritated.

Deciding to let him off the hook, she expanded on her answer. "I'm here until I decide to go back. Well, I have to go back in five months to film, so that's the deadline. But I can leave any time between now and then."

"Film?"

"For my cooking show. We spend six months a year shooting the episodes, and the other six months airing them. I'm on my down time now, obviously. All around America people will be watching 'Miss Mimi's Magical Meals' at six o'clock. They'll all think, 'Now isn't that nice. Golly, I wish I could cook like her!' and then they'll flick to the six thirty news or 'Idol' or whatever else takes their fancy. By six forty-five they won't remember what I cooked or what I was talking about or even what colour my dress was. They don't really care." All of Mimi's fears fell together into a garbled mess as she spoke.

Matt put his arm around her shoulders. "I like your show." He said comfortingly.

"It isn't an international show." Her words sounded choked and distorted. "How can you possibly have even seen it?"

Matt rolled his eyes. "Mimi, dear, I am a rock star. I'm supposed to ask for unrealistic, almost unattainable things. Like access to American stations."

Mimi would have laughed if she hadn't been feeling so depressed. "Why would you want to get American stations? There is a Japanese equivalent to just about every American show ever made these days."

"If it was the only way I'd get to see you, I'd fly to Mars." Matt was suddenly serious, his cerulean eyes burning with passion.

"I've been watching stars coming off of the wall, and maybe if I'm lucky I can catch them before you fall. And you are not alone. Calling out to the astronaut. I need some of what you've got." Mimi sang softly. She couldn't help it. His comment about Mars had reminded her of the song. Astronaut, Mars, the connection was perfectly valid. Now to see how he would react…

"I've got you to propel me, I still need so much." Matt added in a whisper.

There was nothing but silence for a few minutes. That had been their song, all those years ago. When they had dated. Before the deluge. It was on one of Matt's CDs, and it had been playing as he asked her out. And it had always seemed to fit their relationship.

"Oh, and Mimi? On the episode that you made your patented caramel mud cake, you were talking about An Affair to Remember, Cary Grant as your favourite actor, and how you almost named your son after him. And you were wearing a cute blue sundress that came to your knees. It had little straps, and the left one kept sliding off your shoulder."

Mimi's eyes were shining with tears as she leant against Matt; finally letting her defences drop.

Emma's useless facts about nothing in particular

Butterflies taste with their feet.