Author's Note: Warning severe Zell, and minor Squall bashing (don't get me wrong, I like Squall, I just wanting to make fun of him. And Zell…no.)

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"So, do you want to play Blitzball now?"

Denzel was becoming entirely to use to answering this question. The crazy blonde, whose's sugar rush seemed to be wearing off, and the man with hair as tall as skyscraper (no, maybe taller. Wait yes, taller.) had persisted on asking this one question for the past hour and half. And now, once again Denzel repeats.

"No, and will you leave me alone?" Denzel swayed his hand trying to hit them, and just make it look like it was an accident.

"Dang, I missed."

"Wakka, I don't think he wants to play with us?" Tidus sat half-asleep in the corner.

"No, duh!" Denzel hit himself in the head with his hand. These are the moments I miss Yuffie.

"Ah, that's depressing." Wakka hung his head and walked off to who knows where.

"Hey!" The perky girl they called Rikku, walked bouncily over towards Denzel who sat across from Tidus, who now was completely unconscious, on the floor, next to the wall.

"You want a pixie stick. Tidus loves them. And since he's unconscious, you have the rest."

"No thanks."

"No, Rikku!" Jumping from behind her, and dragging her to the ground, Auron appeared. Rikku screamed in pure terror.

"What!?" Rikku squirmed franticly.

"No, don't pollute his mind with yours and Tidus' sugars of doom!" Denzel sat wide-eyed, and watched the older man drag the girl from the room.

"Now, I can find out what I need to know. Lulu, get the lights." The lights flickered for a moment, then total darkness. Until, suddenly a bright light flashed in Denzel's eyes.

"Why did your friend kill the Lady Yuna?" It was a deep, low voice. Which for a moment Denzel thought was Auron's, until he looked towards Auron as the voice spoke, and realized it was Lulu's.

"I told you, Cloud is crazy. Really, really crazy."

"I don't believe you!" Lulu seemed furious.

"Stop squinting!" This time it actually was Auron.

"I can't!"

"Why not!?"

"Because you have a flashlight in my eyes! Dang this brightly colored world!"

"Oh, right." Auron turned off the flashlight, and then realized it was really dark in the room.

"Wow, it's dark, Auron. We really need to think of a better integration place." Lulu's voice was back to normal. She walked over and turned the lights on again.

"Ugh, I feel like crap. What I miss? Did we beat Sin?" Tidus looked around the room for a moment, while everyone stared at him.

"Go back to sleep, Tidus." Auron walked over to him, and whacked him in the head with his sword. Tidus fell back to the floor.

Denzel turned to Auron. "Thank you."

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"Marlene, you have to give me back Cloud's sword, and Vincent's gun." Tifa was beginning to get tired of chasing the young girl around the house.

"No, they haven't finished their tea!" Marlene ran ramped around the entire house carrying the swords, and the gun.

"They're never going to, because they're not real!"

Marlene stopped and dropped the weapons to the ground. "No! How could you question Mrs. Pretty Princess, and Vincenza Easter's existence!"

Marlene looked at the weapons on the ground. "It's ok, don't listen to her."

"Marlene, just give me the weapons." Marlene picked the weapons back up.

"No!" Marlene ran towards the door. She opened it and froze.

"Tifa?" Marlene turned to Tifa, who ran over to the girl. Marlene dropped the weapons again.

"Honey," Tifa said staring out at the black hole outside the door. "Get inside and call your Papa."

"But I want to touch it." At that moment Marlene raced out to the black hole, and jumped in.

"Marlene!" Tifa ran after the girl into the hole.

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"Do you think we should have some kind of funeral for Zell or just keeping staring at him?" Squall turned to face Rinoa.

"Let's just keep staring at him."

The two began to have contests to see who could stare longer without blinking. Rinoa was up two to one, when they saw Irvine running over from a distant.

"You two were supposed to be back at Garden hours ago. What happened?"

They gestured towards Zell's body.

"Oh, well that sucks."

"Not really. Now, I know that staring at a dead body for prolonged periods of time is fun." Rinoa nodded in agreement.

"Oh, let me try."

And after a few more rounds they decided it was time to head back to Garden finally.

"So, what do we do with the body?" Squall said picking up one arm, and then watching it drop.

"We could destroy the evidence of his existence, by throwing him in that black hole over there." Irvine pointed.

"How convenient."

The three-some lifted the body and carried it over to the hole. And after a few swings, threw it gracefully into the hole.

But little did the group know getting to close to a black hole of death often gets you pulled in too, and so, the three were forced down the same path of Zell's body to who knows where.

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"You know, I'm beginning to hate being sucked through these holes to nowhere." Cid mumbled to himself, as the Shera was thrown through the time space continuum.

"Finally, a light at the end of the tunnel." A bright light shown in Cid's eyes, as he felt the ship being pulled into a new world, a world he new nothing of.

"Ugh, dang it." The ship had crash-landed about forty feet from what Cid thought to be another airship, which had just landed.

"Oh Yevon! Why?" Cid turned to see a young women crying on the ground.

"What?" Cid asked in confusion.

"You just took out half of Kilka!" Another man yelled.

"And killed our friends and families." The women said through her tears.

"Oh, I've been doing that a lot, lately. Just don't mind me, I'm going to check out that ship over there." Cid began to back slowly away from the group, who were now grieving on the ground.

"Yes, I can make more friends. And since I'm not in a ship, maybe I won't kill anyone." Cid walked over towards the ship with little caution.

"Hey you! Over there!" Cid pointed to a group of strange looking people, then again, they all looked pretty weird.

"Muug yd dryd lnywo syh ujan drana. (Look at that crazy man over there.)" The one pointed and laughed.

"Ra drehgc fa cbayg Spira. (He thinks we speak Spira.)"

"Mucan. (Loser.)" The other said.

"Hey! Can you help me find Spira? And also, will you be my friends?" Cid ran over to the group. And so after, pulled another cigarette from his pocket.

"This is going to lighten up this madness, I think. You guys want one? The last place I went the guy I asked, his name was Squall, and he was such a downer. He didn't want to be a man."

"Cina. (Sure.)" Cid handed them each a cigarette.

"I hope that meant yes."

After a few brief moments of smoking with the guys, the group heard a yell from behind the parted ship.

"Hey! Come back here, you twerp!"

"Never!" Just then from behind the ship Denzel ran.

"Cid?" Looking over towards the pilot.

"Denzel?"

"Cid, help! There's this crazy man with hair higher than the Shin-Ra building, another man who's hyped up on pixie sticks, some lady with a man voice, a really, really happy and peppy girl, a lion man who doesn't talk, just gives me death stares, and a man with a flashlight!" Denzel ran around and around the ship trying to make his way to Cid, standing only a few feet away.

"Hot dang, a flashlight! And I thought that less of a man, Squall, was bad. I'm coming Denzel!" Cid leaped into action, killing anyone who stood in his way. Most of them the people grieving on the ground, it just seemed like the thing to do. Even if they weren't actually in his way, he wanted them to be with their love ones.

Denzel finally made his way over to Cid. "You alright, kid?"

"Uh-huh." Denzel said with a nod.

"Ok, we have to get you back to Tifa." Taking by the shoulder, he led him to the Shera.

"No," Denzel pulled back. "We can't leave Cloud here."

"We can, and we will. Now, come on, boy."

"I'm not leaving."

"Do you want me to give you back to the man with the flashlight?"

"No! Please don't!"

"Then it's settle, you're coming with me." Cid finally dragged him over to the ship.

"Now, stay here while I call Tifa." Denzel nodded. Cid walked off to be in private.

"Psst…"

Denzel heard a voice in the bushes of the forest.

"Psst…"

"Huh?" Denzel looked around for Cid, before walking towards the bushes.

"You're Denzel, right?"

"Yeah."

"Hi, I need you come with me."

"Why?"

"Because kid, just get in the dang bush!"

"Ok." Denzel walked into the bush.

"I'm Dona, deal with it." The woman said. She dressed in a wear even uglier than Wakka's.

"You know, the last person who said that to me had a man voice."

"Come on, kid." Dona snapped her fingers, and a man a big as the lion man appeared and threw Denzel over his shoulder.

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"Denzel, I couldn't get her so, I'm just going to taking you home. Denzel?" Cid looked around for the boy, but couldn't locate him.

"Dang it! Not again!"

"There he is!" Cid turned to see what was left of the grieving group with pinch forks and soldiers.

"You are under arrest, for killing with a purpose. If you had a purpose than this wouldn't be necessary." The soldier walked over to handcuff Cid.

"You won't take me that easily!" Cid jumped up on the ramp, and sprinted to the cockpit.

"Stop him!" Soldier tried to intrude the ship, but failed.

"Ha!"

"At least tell us your name, so we can added you to our accursed list. You'll be right under the man with the spiky hair."

"I need to think." Cid pushed the intercom button.

"My name is Squall!"

"New accursed one! We must find this 'Squall', and destroy him!"

"Now, for my great escape!" Cid turned to the black hole, still where he left it.

"Yay! Hole!"

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"I hate this. I hate this a lot." Cloud had been walking for what seemed like forever.

"Hey, I think I see that airship again, or maybe it's the seagull." The airship's engines roared.

"Yup, definitely the airship."

"Hey, why are looking at the sky?" Cloud looked down to see a small, young, and girl with brown eyes staring up at him.

"No reason."

"I think you have a reason."

"Don't you have a home, kid."

"No, it got blown up by Sin."

"Sin?"

"You know, that flying fish thing."

"Not really." Cloud could hear the engines roar again. They must be getting ready to leave.

"Hey, Mister." The little girl pulled on his pant leg.

"My name is Calli."

"My name is Cloud. And if you don't mind I hav-" The engines roared once more. Cloud turned to see the airship taking flight.

"Did you want to catch that?"

"You know what? Why don't you go home?"

"I told you it got blown up. Hey, can I come with you?"

"Don't you have a family?"

"My mom is over there, but she won't care. Come on!" Calli grabbed Clouds hand, and began pulling him towards the way the ship had flown.

"Ugh, I really hate this."

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Author's Note: Sorry to all those who love Zell. My sister and I just don't like him. He was a useless piece of poo. And so we dubbed him 'Captain Crap-tastic' and the

Crap-ets (Irvine, Edea, Selphie).

On a better note, thank you to all our two reviewers, you guys (or girls) rock!