Okay, next chapter coming up and I hope you enjoy! There are no demons, Mikos, half-demons, etc. in this story!
"Come on, you'll eat with us today!" said Rin, tugging at Kagome's wrists.
Kagome finally managed to pry herself free of the girls grasp, Rin looking at her as she turned her face over her shoulder, saying, "Look, I don't know what I did, but it was nothing, don't thank me."
Rin looked at her curiously for a moment, Kagome staring away, her eyes narrowed, certain this girl would leave. Until she felt her grasp her wrists again and began to pull her across the rooftop of the building.
"Hey—wait, didn't you—" said Kagome, slightly frantically as she once again tried to free herself.
"Yes, I did hear you, but I'm gonna thank you anyways," said Rin, not facing her but her shoulder-length hair bobbing, catching the light.
Kagome began, "Look, I don't need or want your thanks—"
But she was cut off as Rin, turning a fraction so that a bit of her profile could be seen looking at her, said to her: "Don't you get lonely, always by yourself?"
"…"
Kagome didn't answer. But as Rin caught her eyes, her mask slipped beneath her upper face and she could tell her answer.
"Oh," said Rin aloud and began waving to a group of students in the distance. She caught the eye of a red-haired girl, who waved to her back.
"That's them," said Rin and she and Kagome began to walk toward the group of two girls, eating against the railing of the rooftop. Kagome said nothing, but she immediately wanted to stop walking to them, with this girl, and run away. Rin wouldn't let her go.
"Hey!" said Rin as she and Kagome made their way through throngs of students to the corner of the rooftop, with the two girls.
"Hey, Rin," the Ayame answered, lifting her hand while still clasping a plum in it. "I already bought lunch," Ayame explained as she pointed to the group of wrapped foods and juice boxes on the floor by her lap, "we're just waiting for Kikyo, I don't know where she…"
But Ayame stopped short of her sentence, for she just realized the girl Rin was with and reddened. Kagome looked away from her flushed face, not facing any of them and not wanting to meet any of their eyes.
No one said anything, the only sound but of students talking beside them while eating, chatting and laughing, in green skirt or black uniforms.
"Kikyo hasn't gotten here yet," said Sango to break the awkward silence in with the abashed Ayame was staring at the floor, Rin looking toward the distance at the students eating on the grounds below, and Kagome looking away from all of them.
"Really?" said Rin, turning away from the grounds to look at Sango.
"Yeah," said Sango, taking a juice box from the group of lunch good and poking a straw into it, sucking the juice for a moment before continuing with, "I didn't see her at Study hall either; we were supposed to meet to discuss Onigumo-sensei's assignment."
"Oh…I was supposed to meet with you two too, wasn't I…?" said Rin guiltily, smiling with her tongue sticking from her mouth, her hand at the back of her head.
"Yes, you were!" said Sango, as firmly as she could manage while sipping from the straw, "you know Ayame's the only one that's finished the report, you were supposed to be with us."
"Yes, yes, I know," said Rin, half-guilty, half-joking. For a moment she merely smiled before pulling back her hand from the back of her head and withdrawing her tongue into her mouth. Then she said, looking at both Ayame and Sango, "But I had to pick up something first. Now," Rin released Kagome's wrists, still eyeing her as if she suspected she would make a run for it when freed of her shackles, "This is Kagome Higurashi."
Kagome said nothing in reply, because Rin's introduction was not necessary. Everybody had known Kagome Higurashi, at least who she was:
She was neither infamous of famous in the school: in fact, there was nothing remarkable about her, except that she was the twin sister of the popular Kikyo Higurashi. But people thought nothing of her besides that. She was merely a blank, a nothing in the school, in the society. She wasn't remarkable, she wasn't friendly, and she wasn't anything: the only one who knew her was Kikyo and she was only known because she was related to Kikyo. That was all anybody knew about her; no one encountered her, no one wanted to see her, no one cared.
She was a blank.
Nobody knew the true Kagome and those who approached her were brushed away, turned away, their words and being unacknowledged, and their very being ignored. No one tried to talk to her: they only wanted to be with Kikyo, the girl who had everything, the girl who shone such a bright light that Kagome was extinguished. If they had Kikyo, they didn't need Kagome. After all, who wouldn't pick the first rate item over the second best?
Therefore, Kagome barely existed at the school. She made no remarkable achievements in class, the teachers didn't acknowledge her mediocre papers, nor did she ever answer a question or raise a hand. No body but Kikyo noticed when she was absent and nobody noticed when she was there. If they did, they ignored her. Why go for the second best when the first was in your reach? Why go for the second-rate Kagome when you could go for the top, the highest, the most popular and first-rate Kikyo?
Kagome never acknowledged anyone in return. They were all shadows to her as she was a ghost to them. No one noticed, no one cared. No one needed Kagome Higurashi. Not when they had Kikyo.
At first Sango had thought this, she knew the nothingness of this strange girl. But she knew she was wrong.
You showed me that yesterday, Kagome…the true you…maybe just a bit…maybe just a bit, you opened your heart up to this pathetic girl and showed her who you are…maybe just a bit.
"I wanted to thank you, Kagome," said Rin, turning to her while Kagome still looked away, "for helping my Sango,"
Rin looked at her as Kagome still looked away, looking both flustered and wishing to leave. Rin smiled.
"Well," said Rin, sitting down and forcing Kagome down to onto the rooftop, "come on, let's eat; it was Ayame's treat, we don't want it to go to waste!"
…
Kagome sat silently, looking at the group of girls. She vaguely knew everyone of these girls, but she didn't know them well. Kikyo had introduced them to Kagome once and she had brushed them away, looking away from them with dull indifference.
Ayame was the young girl with red hair, brilliant as the color of rust, her long hair falling in curls away from her pale face and wide-green eyes.
Rin, with shoulder-length dark hair and a slightly darker complexion, smiled as she talked to Sango, laughing with her fiery, deep-brown eyes.
Sango, whom she had met yesterday, looked with her modest expression at her friend, her long hair falling down her back in a ponytail and her red-rimmed eyes occasionally turning to Kagome, who blushed and turned away.
But the center of the group seemed to be Kikyo. Kikyo seemed to be the girl who held everything in motion, who, albeit was the quietest and the least opinionative, held the group. She was talked to, never saying anything unkind or intentionally displeasing, always smiling with her soft smile, laughing with her brief giggles, pushing away her long, straight, shining hair with her delicate hand, and quietly watching them. I wonder where Kikyo is… thought Kagome as she looked around the girls. Rin and Sango were discussing Kikyo's whereabouts, Rin surmising (with an obvious all-knowing and envious air) that Kikyo was with Inuyasha ("well, he is supposed to be her boyfriend, he should be around her at least once in a life-time!"). Sango was deep in thought, listening absentmindedly as Rin went on, saying occasionally, "sure, Rin," "maybe so," and "uh-huh, uh-huh…"
But it was apparent to Kagome that Sango was thinking hard. She was…different than the other girls, if only a bit. She seemed to know a bit more about the true Kikyo than they did, but she acted as always, looking modestly at Kikyo's false form.
"I just hope she's okay," said Ayame, seated next to Kagome and frequently casting her wide-eyed, fearful yet curious, looks.
"I'm sure she's fine, its not like Yashie called her up to dump her for some other girl, not Kikyo." said Rin, with an all-knowing air.
"I don't think that's what she meant, Rin," said Sango quietly as she fingered through her white-rice with her chopsticks.
"Of course it what she meant!" said Rin and, taking a fearful Ayame's shoulders and saying, "I know my Ayaa well enough, her minds prone to think about these things with Koga on her mind…"
"RIN!" said Ayame, reddening drastically.
"I think you'd better leave it at that, Rin," said Sango.
Rin laughed, Ayame looked flustered, and Sango merely watched, her mood still darker than it had been before. Kagome looked at them, quietly. She felt out of place, like a white horse tossed into a group of zebras, like a dead, withered flower in a group of beautiful blossoms. She watched them and felt even more and more unneeded in this world.
They had invited her into their group to be nice, nothing more. She was no more a friends to them than she had ever been, she was unneeded by everyone, anything. Their world still revolved without her and her being their only seemed to perturb the orbit.
If Kikyo were here, it would have been different…
"What do you think, Kagome?"
Kagome was brought out of her thoughts and awakened to see Rin and Ayame looking at her, Sango from out of the corner of her eye.
"What do I…?"
"About Kikyo and Yashie," said Rin, looking at her while placing her chin on Ayame's head bent beneath her.
Kagome was silent for a moment and Sango said, "Rin, I don't think this is really…"
"Come on Sango, Kagome's her twin sister, she lives in the same house as Kikyo, she'll know!" said Rin, with the air of explaining something obvious. Then she looked back at Kagome, smiling and said, "What do you think about Kikyo and Inuyasha?"
"They don't seem to be around each other much…" said Ayame quietly under Rin, like a hand under its owner's chin, "I'm not really sure…"
"Well, I'm sure if anything had happened between them, Kikyo would've told us Rin," said Sango assuredly, but in her voice there was a shade of a lie, of pretending.
"I know, San-san," said Rin huffily, "but I'm sure there's something going on. Plus, it's always fun to guess about this stuff!"
Kagome looked at them silently, trying to keep her eyes on the floor and the juice box she was holding.
"Anyway, just because you're not interested in relationships, San, doesn't mean that we all aren't!" said Rin.
Kagome's eyes feel upon Sango and she noticed a shade of darkness fall upon her face. An almost unnoticeable depression and sadness fell over her, darkening the air around her, a darkness Kagome could feel that only she could tell. But Sango smiled, almost bitterly, and said, "…you're right, I…don't care about that stuff."
"But what do you think Kagome?" Rin asked, turning away from Sango, seemingly oblivious to her shade of darkness.
Kagome was thinking about her discussion with Sango the other day and did not answer. But Ayame covered up her silence by saying, "Rin, I'm sure Kikyo's alright if she said so…"
"But she hasn't said she wasn't, and you can just tell," said Rin with her usual haughty air.
"Tell what?" said Ayame, removing herself from under Rin's head.
"You can tell that there's something Kikyo's not telling us," said Rin, smiling, and Kagome looked at her. She knew she had said it about the relationship jokingly as she seemed to always do, but…
"Well, you still haven't answered me, Kagome," said Rin in her usual peppy, strong voice, "what do you think about Inuyasha and Kikyo?"
Kagome turned to look at her and then looked at her feet. She was thinking, thinking about how Inuyasha and Kikyo had been acting with one another the past few times, about how they barely encountered, about how Kikyo was trying to avoid him and her feelings for him, about Inuyasha himself…
And angered boiled in her suddenly, an anger so abrupt that it slipped past her disguise and it took everything she had to conceal it. Her hands clenched the folds of her skirt and she bit the inside of her mouth. The anger boiled in her blood and it wouldn't stop; anger that wouldn't cease.
How can Kikyo love that man, that arrogant, self-centered idiot!!!
"I'm…sure their doing fine," said Kagome, struggling to keep her voice indifferent and calm.
As she answered, Ayame looked at Rin and said, "See, even Kagome says that their fine Rin, we shouldn't worry about it."
"Are you sure, Kagome?" said Rin, almost pleadingly as she turned to face her, "Are you sure their, you know, still together and stuff?"
"…"
"…yes," said Kagome after her first pause and she looked at the ground, saying with difficulty to dam the anger from seeping into her words, "I'm sure they're fine…after all…why would Inuyasha want anyone other than her…?"
Yes…I don't care what you do, I don't care if you think I'm a wench, you only need Kikyo and I only need myself…
But even as she thought this, she was stung by her own reassurance. Who cares if he didn't care for her, who cares if he only cared for Kikyo, who cares if she didn't? She didn't care, she didn't even want to think about him…did she?—no, she didn't!
"Why would…" said Kagome and she felt her thoughts overwhelm her. Yes, it was true. But, even though she tried to deny it, depression crushed her as she said it; "Why would…he love anyone but her…?"
There was a moment's silence in which Kagome looked away, her bangs hiding her eyes, her whole being refraining from shaking. Sango looked at Kagome, Ayame fearfully eying her and Rin at the same time, and Rin looking silently at her hidden eyes.
"Yeah," said Rin, almost painfully, "I guess he wouldn't like anybody other than Kikyo…after all, they've been together forever."
Rin's words reassured her, even if they stung her. She was right, after all. He only cared for Kikyo. She didn't care fro him and he didn't care for her.
"But it would be more fun if something was happening!" said Rin, almost yearningly.
"Sure, Rin," said Sango, quietly and darkly.
"I think it's good that everything is still good with them, even if it isn't as exciting," said Ayame.
Kagome looked at them, knowing it was true. He didn't care, and she didn't care, she never would. Kikyo and Inuyasha would soon sort out things, soon enough, they would, she knew it… besides, Inuyasha couldn't like anybody else, and Kikyo could only love him…there was no doubt about it…
…
Kagome looked away from the mirror when she entered the bathroom, unwilling to look into the glass. As she washed her hands, the cold, cool liquid streaming through her hands and the soap frothing up her the pools in her palms, she could hear the school bell ring. The day had ended, as it always did. There was nothing new, there would be nothing new; even the bet wouldn't change that, it wouldn't change the way the bell rang or the way the day ended as it always did. Drying her hands as she turned the knob of the faucet and grabbing her bag as she slung it over her shoulders, Kagome opened the door of the public restroom.
They had left, as everyone did. They had invited her in to be polite and they had left her, going away, distancing themselves from her as everyone did. The class had ended; she had gotten more homework; she had received the god-damned math assignment, the one she knew she would fail; and she had gone away from them. Nothing was different. She probably wouldn't have the courage to follow through with the bet and Kikyo would again fall madly in love with Inuyasha and he would continue to love her. Another thing she's beat her in.
Kagome grabbed the books out of her locker and forced them into her bag. Her books were no different, these people were no different, and she was no different. Yes….
Kagome looked away and she saw students talking and laughing amongst one another. Yes…they were laughing without her, being without her. She was a blank against them. She was blank to them; nothing was remarkable about her; Kikyo was the one remarkable.
Kagome felt the wind brush her face as she stepped out onto the grounds, without seeing Kikyo nearly all day. She walked back home, alone, without anyone. No one said anything to her. She left. She was right after all, no one cared, no one noticed. Yes no one noticed.
But they had noticed as they left, the rooftop clattering beneath their feet.
"See ya later, Kagome!" said Rin, waving her hand and smiling.
Sango said softly, a bit of the gloominess fading from her, "good-bye," and Ayame nodded her head, the three girls leaving the rooftop and Kagome alone, with only the promises of meeting again in her hands.
…
"Hey, what are we having for dinner?"
Sota and Kaede raced down the stairs, Kaede beating him by a hairsbreadth and running up to Kagome.
Kagome, who seated on the floor with her head in her hands, looking hopelessly at her math homework, raised her head and said, "I don't know, I'm doing my math right now."
"And I'm helping," said Jii-chan, sitting by her with Buyo curled (he wasn't really helping, more like making it more confusing but convincing himself that he was helping anyway, thought Kagome miserably as he said this.)
Kagome, her hair falling past her shoulders and her legs crossed in her jeans, once again put her head to the table and relished the feel of the cool wood against her over-heating head, vaguely the conversation beside her("Kagome doesn't look so good…" said Kaede worriedly. "Are you sure you're helping her, gramps?" asked Sota.)
Kagome could smell the scent of food in the kitchen, arousing within her as sudden hunger. It smelled unfamiliar to her, as if she hadn't caught it scent in a while…
"Hey, Kikyo's making okonomiyaki," said Sota, poking his head into the kitchen to discover the scent.
"Really? Kikyo hasn't cooked in a while." said Kaede, joining Sota by the kitchen door.
The words finally registered in Kagome's head and she shot up, sending her book crashing to the floor, Jii-chan waking from his sudden nap, and Buyo pricking up his ears and his hair fizzing up. Sota and Kaede jumped as Kagome raced over to them, peeking into the kitchen and then running into the room, sending the door slamming in her wake.
Kikyo whipped her head around to see her, her hair held up in its ponytail bouncing on her shoulders.
"Oh," said Kikyo as Kagome approached, sending her hand over her sweaty forehead and patting her floury apron. Kagome was silent for am moment, looking over at Kikyo and the cooking implements set by her.
The kitchen was small, and Kagome saw Kikyo had opened the only window right by the counter and over the sink. The screen showed the night dappled with stars and streaked with dark clouds, hidden by a branch of maple.
"Y-y-y…you're…c-cooking…?" said Kagome after a while, looking back from Kikyo to the pan upon which she was cooking.
"Yes," said Kikyo, looking at Kagome's astonished face, "Is that so much of a surprise?"
"Yes!" said Kagome, looking at Kikyo almost as if she had never seen her before. "You absolutely hate cooking."
Kikyo managed to hide the vein popping in her head and returned to chopping cabbage on the cutting board, careful to avoid her fingers beneath the edge of the large knife. Kagome watched her, almost too astounded to speak.
Then she said, forcing the words out of her mind and mouth, "W-why are y…you cooking?"
"What do you mean 'why'?" asked Kikyo as she continued to chop the cabbage, sending the smell of the fresh vegetable into the air.
"I mean 'why'," said Kagome, still looking at her and a bag of flour, a package of fish, and a spatula beside her.
"I…just felt like it," said Kikyo, looking away from Kagome.
The clatter of the knife against the wooden cutting board filled the stretched of silence between Kagome and Kikyo. Then Kagome, biting her lip and thinking hard, said quietly, almost so softly that her words couldn't have been heard.
"D-did…..did something happen, Kikyo?" said Kagome softly in a whisper.
The clattering of the knife against the cutting board stopped. Kikyo, still holding the wooden handle, did not turn to see Kagome. Kagome looked at her anxiously, dreading the answer and asking herself furiously why she had asked.
Then to her amazement, Kikyo turned her head to her, smiling and laughing loudly. Kagome looked at her, confused.
"Ha ha…why would you ask that, Kagome?" said Kikyo, laughing. But Kagome knew that this wasn't her true laugh, it wasn't the real, soft, and brief laughter of Kikyo. Kagome now knew that her fear was true.
Kikyo put her hand over her smiling open mouth, apparently trying to seem as if struggling to cover up her laughter, and continued to giggle.
"I'm fine Kagome…I don't know why you ask…ha ha…what a weird question," said Kikyo, her laughter fading and her hand dropping from over her mouth. She couldn't help it; Kagome might have known, but she couldn't stop.
Kagome looked at her, nervously, holding her hands, clenching the fabric of her long shirt. "Are you sure you're…"
"I'm fine, Kagome!" said Kikyo, grabbing a package of meat from the counter. "What a weird question…"
Kagome looked at her. Her hazel eyes full of worry and her hair sticking to the sides of her face from the heat of the pan, she said, venturing on, "Kikyo…if there's anything wrong, please, please…please, just tell me…"
"There's nothing wrong, Kagome, I'm fine, and I'm just preparing dinner is all!" said Kikyo, her laughter gone and only her sweet, loud voice continuing.
Kagome looked at her, unable to hide the fear in her eyes. But even as Kikyo saw them, she was still laughing and smiling, and she said, almost as dumbly as could be managed giggling, "What's up, Kagome? You look so—"
"Please don't talk like that Kikyo, you know why I look like this," said Kagome, timidly but firmly. She clenched her shirt, her fingers tracing the sweat of her hands onto her jeans. Kikyo still looking at her, she said, "Please…what's wrong?"
"I should be asking you that!" said Kikyo, laughing loudly and sending a shiver up Kagome's spine. "You look sooooo worried!"
"Kikyo, don't talk like that, please!" said Kagome firmly, the quivering in her voice quickly fading. She looked scared but determined. She knew something was wrong, she could tell by Kikyo's voice and her laughter. And her eyes dared not meet her worried hazel ones.
Kikyo looked at the cabbage sitting, all shredded and chopped, up on the cutting board and continued to smile. "I'm fine, Kagome, really, I am!" she said. Her voice was sweet, too sweet as if it had been glazed in honey and powdered in sugar. It was glazed and sweet, covering the ugly item inside. An ugliness that took all the sweetness to hide. "I'm just worried about you! Look at you, so worried! What's up?"
She didn't pursue it longer. She felt stung by the sweetness of her voice, hurt by the dulcet rings of her voice. Kagome looked silently at Kikyo's back turned to her as she threw the cabbage into a bowl and tore the plastic off the meat package. Trying to hide the hurt, anger, empathy, and sympathy in her voice, Kagome said in a whisper, "…nothing…It's nothing."
Kikyo looked back at her after a while, seeing her vanish through the kitchen door and out of sight. And the smile immediately faded from her face and the familiar sight of her down-cast eyes and smile-less lips filled her. The soba bubbled for a while in a pot, the water boiling with the noodles inside. She was silently standing by the counter, thinking, not hearing the noises outside of Kagome complaining about her math to Jii-chan, Jii-chan explaining how it related to the tale he had heard of the four daimyo, Sota plucking at Buyo's floppy ears and Kaede playing with his tail.
She hated cooking, she always had. It was never an appealing exercise to her, but only Kagome knew how much she disliked it. Years ago, when Kikyo was still in middle-school, their mother had been searching for a job. She had been a full-time part-timer than, working so long she couldn't come back until one in the morning. Because Jii-chan couldn't cook, the two Higurashi girls, meaning Kagome and Kikyo, were forced to cook and create meals for the family together. Kikyo hated it. She hated it because she simply hated doing the subject. She loathed it. But she never said anything against it, becoming the doll to her mothers use, becoming the tool to her aid, without feelings.
During that time, she met Inuyasha. She remembered the first time she met him, when she had gone into the garden to gather some vegetables for the late-dinner they were having. She remembered walking down the steps, inwardly cursing that she had to be in that kitchen, with Kagome, with the girl she envied so much and yearned to be. And she remembered hearing a noise.
She had noticed that vegetables had been vanishing form the garden, as did her sister and mother. Since that had happened, she kept watch from the screen door, squinting through the darkness, to catch a glimpse of the thief. She never moved and barely breathed when she saw him leave. She never, though, caught a glimpse of him clearly, only seeing him jump through the bushes and leave. Until the one day.
Kikyo exited the house, cursing the food, cursing the stench of it entering her nostrils, cursing everything. She hated it! She hated nothing more, nothing more except for herself. Kicking the wall and cursing to herself, she grabbed the basket in which to gather the vegetables and headed to the door. The cool night air wafted from the screen door, a light flickering from the eaves. The she heard it. The sound of rustling. The sound of crunching. The sound of snapping. Someone was in the bushes.
It's him again! Thought Kikyo, the sudden thought rushing to her. Her heart leapt, pounding loudly under her breast. She could almost surmise that its loud beating could be heard not only by her. Shaking, adrenaline filling her quickly, Kikyo held the basket tight and hurried closer to the door. She waited a moment before approaching the door, in fear that he might see her and that he might flee. She wouldn't let that happen. NO, she wouldn't let him flee from her again. She waited by the door, her thoughts racing, her heart madly pounding. She could barely hear anything around her, it was all drowned out by her thudding heart, pulsing veins, and stirring thoughts. She could only hear that and the continuous sound of crunching amongst the bushes.
No, I—I can't…I can't do it, no I…! Thought Kikyo, pulled between going into the garden and remaining here as she always did. Always watching him leave, always watching them going.
But, gripping the wicker of her basket tightly, Kikyo opened the door. It opened swiftly, but as the screen door was pushed ajar, the hinges loudly creaked. Kikyo stopped immediately. Her mind was racing, but her heart was loudest and most painful.
Damn it, damn it! She thought angrily, holding her breath and trying to stop her madly quivering body. She didn't even know why she was shaking or why she was thinking so hard. But she held her strained breath and listened closely. The footstep, so soft already, had stopped so that they assuredly could not be heard.
Damn! Thought Kikyo as they had stopped, like a rabbit chewing on clover blossoms until it realized a moment before it quickly flees that someone was watching. He was gonna leave…that was it, he would never come back…he knew someone was watching, he wouldn't come…no he wouldn't come!
That meant know she had to try. Before he left, forever out of her life.
"Is someone there?" Kikyo asked into the darkness, fully opening the door. As she said this, she was amazed by the calmness of her voice, considering the mess inside her.
She saw the silhouette of the boy through the bushes as she grasped a candle from inside, the only one light by the window.
The cold breeze cooled her and she felt a sudden shiver. Why the heck did I decide to wear my nightgown during dinner? I knew I would be going outside, it's too cold to wear something that barely reaches my ankles and is as thin as paper!
But Kikyo tried not to mind this. Was it him? Was it him behind those bushes, was it him there again? Would he be there or had he already fled? But, as Kikyo prepared to call out again, she saw his silhouette and a trace of the long silvery hair through the bushes. She sighed with relief. So it was him…
"So you are here," she said and she entered the garden.
And all had begun then.
Soon, her mother had acquired a job and Kagome and Kikyo were no longer forced to cook the meals for the family. Kikyo hated it but…it was one of the connections she had with Inuyasha. Kikyo remembered as soon as Inuyasha no longer need the garden, she was no longer cooking and could plant flowers in the soil instead of tomatoes or cucumbers.
He was with her…he always was…
But as Kikyo thought this, as she pulled back her head and rather faced the open night sky under which she and Inuyasha met than the ceiling, she felt nothing but an emptiness and emptiness she could not fill.
Than why had she pulled away from him…why had she seen that single face?
…
He turned around. The night was thick, but his thoughts were thicker, flooding with memory and thoughts. His thick, silvery hair was strewn around him on the floor, as he lay on the floor beside the bed, in his sweatshirt and baggy jeans. The window flooded with light that poured over him, cut into four individual squares by the frame.
Inuyasha cracked open a golden eye, heaving himself up on his side on one elbow to look at the window and let the thin shadow of the frame fall across his face. He couldn't sleep; he couldn't even raise himself up; his mind was too thick with thoughts.
"Just a bit, mother?"
The city was framed against the window, showing in box-like shadows filled with squares of light. The clouds were as thick as his thoughts and hid the moon from view.
"Just a bit, my love."
Inuyasha looked through his golden eyes into the night that shown through his window and he could see the streets before his, the alleys, and every nook and cranny.
Izayoi looked at him lovingly, pulling her thin coat higher over her small shoulders and smiling. Her dark, long hair was pulled into a bun, with a tail of long strands falling from it past her shoulders.
He could barely remember it, but he thought it had been twilight at that time, the sun setting and painting the sky with the colors of bright orange, pale pink and bright red.
The park was small, between the suburban land and city. As Izayoi walked over the wooden ledge her shoes, so worn and old, crunched over the woodchips and the stray strands of grass poking through into the area.
"Aren't you cold, Inuyasha?" she asked to the young boy ahead of her, alone in the park.
She walked closer to the swing set, the old metal chains held on the bar of the set creaking. She touched the old metal, feeling the rust beneath her bare fingers, and looked at the small boy.
He had jagged white hair, falling barely past his shoulders and wild from swinging to and fro nearly the whole day. His face was smiling softly, his golden eyes looking at the tree branch over him of which he was trying to kick with his feet, swinging higher and higher. He was nearly laughing, his silvery hair flying everywhere, as he clutched the chains of the swing and kicked up and back, going higher and higher into the air.
"Look, mother, look, I can swing on my own! Look!" said the young boy excitedly as he swung to and fro.
Izayoi, smiling, said as she perched herself on the wooden board of the swing and clutched the chains in her hands, "Wow, I didn't know you could swing on your own, my love."
"I can, I can! Look, I can almost touch that leaf!" said Inuyasha as he continued to swing, aiming to kick the foliage on the branch before him.
"Yes, you can," said Izayoi, smiling at her son. She caught a loose coil of long hair in her fingers and pulled it behind her ears, looking at her son with her gentle expression.
Inuyasha continued to swing higher, still endeavoring to touch the branch with the tip of his shoe. His wild hair flew around him as the wind caught him while he swung. Izayoi watched him all that time, smiling and holding her hands in her lap.
"Look, look mother!" he said excitedly in the air, "I touched it, I touched the leaf, did you see?"
"Oh, I did!" said Izayoi, loud enough to reach him through the winds whistling over his ears. "I'm so proud of you, Inuyasha."
As he touched the leaf several more times, Inuyasha soon began to stop kicking into the air and let his legs fly freely around him. Soon he descended low on the swing, his feet touching the woodchips beneath him. Izayoi watched him swing beside her, stationary as she sat on the stiff swing. Soon Inuyasha kicked his heels into the woodchips to stop and sat, swaying lightly, on the swing. His mother turned to him and touched the side of his face, saying, "You're face is cold, Inuyasha. We should leave soon, its getting chilly."
"No, no, lets stay a little longer, please!" said Inuyasha, turning to see her once her hand retreated back into her lap.
Izayoi looked at him and said, "…Its getting late, love, we really should get in before it gets too cold."
"But it's not that cold!" said Inuyasha, determined to stay.
Izayoi looked at him, and again ran the back of her hand over his cheek, saying as she did so, "I know you want to stay, Inuyasha, but we really should go before it gets too late. Come on, Uncle Myoga will get worried if were too late."
"But mother—!" Inuyasha started but Izayoi drew the scarf around her neck and placed it on Inuyasha, where it slid on his small shoulders and covered the lower half of his face completely so that his frosty breath trickled out of the woolen cloth.
Izayoi smiled as he fought against the scarf, pulling down at it until his nose poked out from over it. As he did this, Izayoi noticed something at the side of his face.
"What's that?" she said, reaching out to catch his face in her hands.
"What's what?" asked Inuyasha, his voice muffled beneath the scarf.
Izayoi took in her hands his face and turned it over to her, to see it clearly. As she saw it, Inuyasha's already pink cheeks and nose from the cold reddened more.
"Inuyasha…" said Izayoi quietly as she let go of his face, her hands falling to her sides and her expression calm but her voice serious. "Did you get into a fight again?"
"It wasn't my fault!" said Inuyasha, turning to her defiantly as if she had accused that he had insinuated it.
Izayoi looked at him, her gentle eyes full of partly concealed worry and her silence careful. Inuyasha turned away from her, not wanting to look at her face or let her catch sight of him any longer; her stare burned him and he wished the scarf had reached up and covered his ears, so that he could not hear anything and her concerned silence.
"Inuyasha…" said Izayoi softly, her voice soft, filled with not reproach, scolding, of rebuke, but concern.
"I told you, it wasn't my fault!" he said loudly, still not turning to face her. He didn't want to see her concerned face; he felt horrible when he worried her, he felt like the worst when he heard her concerned voice.
Izayoi was silent for a moment and then said softly, trying to keep her voice gentle and almost an whisper, "Inuyasha…you know…you know I don't like it when you fight. You know you shouldn't—"
"But they started it!" said Inuyasha loudly to the wood-chipped floor.
"It doesn't matter who started it," said Izayoi, placing her hand on his shoulder; his shoulder burned at her touch, and he yearned to shake it off. "What matters is that you don't fight, even if it wasn't you who started it."
"But—but—"said Inuyasha desperately, trying to convince her that he was innocent, "But it really wasn't my fault?"
"Were they making fun of your hair color again?" Izayoi asked gently, her hand still on her son's shoulder. "Was that it?"
"But they were saying that we were dirt, that we were as bad a filth!" said Inuyasha to his feet touching the ground.
Izayoi was silent for a moment, only looking at the back of her son's head, and touching his shoulder. She could feel it shaking so softly, trying so hard not to quiver.
"They said…th-that you shouldn't have d-disgraced the Takahashi name…they said that father was a sh-shame too, because he married you," said Inuyasha, his voice soft and tremulous.
Izayoi watched his, her hand yearning to wipe away any of the tears turned away from her.
"Th-they were calling you a w-wench…I couldn't l-let them do that." He aid quietly, so soft that Izayoi almost couldn't hear him.
As these words reached Izayoi's ears, she looked at Inuyasha for a moment longer and then held him to her, laying his head against her breast. She could feel his body shake beneath her arms, and his voice so softly say, "I-it isn't fair…that they can c-call you that… that th-they can call us that. Why are they like that…?"
Izayoi held him, feeling the few tears he shed on the cloth over her chest and his saying in his muffled voice in her arms and scarf, "The-they called you…f-filth and a wench…I c-couldn't let them do th-that…!"
"Oh, Inuyasha…" said Izayoi as she held him to her. She held him for a while, letting him merely shake in her arms and shedding no more than several tears, until he pushed himself away from her and wiped his eyes and nose with the back of his sleeve.
"Oh, my love…" said Izayoi, touching the small scratch on his cheek and looking at him with gentle, soft eyes. "I know…you were just helping me…but you shouldn't fight; I don't want you getting hurt for my sake."
"I was just helping you," said Inuyasha quietly, his bangs hiding his swollen, golden eyes.
Izayoi looked at him and then held him again, saying, "my poor Inuyasha…my poor child. Thank you…for trying to save me…"
Inuyasha remembered that day, the bright colors of the sun, sky, and trees falling against them in that autumn season. And he could remember his mother holding him, stroking his silvery hair, and whispering words into it.
"I was helping you."
Inuyasha's golden eyes snapped completely open, looking out into the darkness of the night as he lay on the floor.
"Well, I did interfere, to help you!"
Inuyasha shot up on his elbow, supported by his folded arm. He didn't even know why he remembered it or why he remembered it now, but…
"…And don't insult me after I tried to help you!"
She stood there, her hands at her sides, her dark hair falling over her as she was before him, out of breath to intercept Koga's blow. Tears rimmed her eyes, barely visible as she tried to hide them.
Inuyasha could not see the moon beyond the clouds outside the window, or the silhouette of the city.
"I don't need you're help, wench!" He said angrily.
"The-they were calling you a w-wench…I couldn't l-let them do that…"
Inuyasha sat, his torso heaved up and his eyes wide as he looked into the night. He remembered it vaguely and the words they had called his mother: 'wench' and 'filth'. And he remembered what he had said to her as he stood in the streets, looking at her angrily:
"Well, I don't want your help, wench, just looking at you makes me angry!"
And she stood before, him, her expression blank. Then she shouted back, the tears springing visibly in her eyes and the hurt and anger in her voice, "Fine, then this wench won't help you anymore!"
"The-they called you…f-filth and a wench…"
Inuyasha could numbly remember him saying this, as he sniffed and let the seldom tears from his eyes. And he could remember himself calling her this, and letting her run with hurt and anger in her voice.
And Inuyasha stood still, insensibly, numb, and wide-eyed. The he dropped to the ground, his arms spread loosely before him, his hair tangled beneath him.
"Damn…" he said, remembering her shouting it at him, tears partly hidden in her eyes, "what the hell did I say to her?"
Inuyasha lay on the floor, thinking, trying to tell himself he cared nothing for it, nothing for what he had said, and that he cared nothing for her. But he remembered her face and his words, and he lay, turned against the floor, his golden eyes reflecting no light in the darkness.
…
Well, this is the 5th chapter of Lovely Mask and the last chapter for a while. I'm sorry to say I'll be putting it on hold for a while, because it should've been started a while later when I wasn't in the middle of another story.
I really hope I'm not disappointing people too much (I'm sure I'm not, I'm not the best writer out there, hehe...) so I'm really sorry, but I'm sure I'll be picking up the story again, and not too late. But read some of the other stories of AnimeGirls and I hope you continue to enjoy our works, and hopefully this story when it's back up for updating again.
Don't be angry!
-Noname