Ice: 'Kay, since I'm kinda running out of death ideas, reviewers, I'm holding a death contest!
Woot!
(Thanks to PClaw, for the idea, who should update his story regularly. But doesn't!) (Also, you metioned the word update. So...yeah.)
Ha I burned you a third time.
I'll…stop now. You've been nice to me…I'll stop…
ANYWAY, REVIEW THIS STORY, PEONS!
Oh, and the N:A reference will be painstakingly obvious, and will cause the death of Pein. Think hard about it, and you'll get it.
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"ZOMG!!!!!111!!!!!!!!Eleventyoneabconetwothreequantumphysics." Pein blinked. Who was this person? She had kitty ears. And insane eyes. And she looked like she was going to rape him. Pein hid behind the first person he saw, who was Blue.
"'Da hell? Why are you hiding behind me, again?" He pointed at the young, insane, pubescent girl.
"She's going to rape me, and/or kill me!" Fanny the Fangirl looked at Blue angrily.
"ZOMG T3H F3MAL3 CANON! U MUST DIEEE!" Fanny the Fangirl went to attack her. Unfourtunatley, Blue just put a hand on her forehead, keeping Fanny at Bay.
"Nyeeeaaah! But PeinTobi must rule all!" Pein punched her in the face. As she came up, her anime-esque crying eyes looked at Pein.
"Why did u do that?" Pein looked at her as if it were painstakingly obvious. Which, technically, it was.
"Because you see her?" He pointed to Blue, "Yeah, I have a better chance with her than I do with your stupid fan-made pairings. I.E, Tobi. Tobi is probably like, four years younger than me. Somehow, since I don't know my age, I don't know how hold he is. Nonetheless, I have a better chance of being with her than your stupid yaoi pairings." Blue didn't say anything. She didn't want to tell him about her inner SasuNaru, SoRi, and AkuRoku fangirl.
"……Blue?"
"HUH? Yeah…"
"Don't you agree? Basically this girl is wrong and completely ignores canon?"
"Oh yeah. Sure."
"ZOMG U MUST DIEEEEEE!" She tried attacking Blue again, who simply put a hand on her forehead.
"God…can we cut to Tobi or Itachi, or whoever for a second?"
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"Sasori? I have a question." The adorably happy swirly-masked killer pranced-
That's right.
Pranced.
Over to Sasori.
"Hm? Yeah, what is it, Tobi?"
"What's emo mean?" Sasori sweat-dropped.
"Tobi, why are you asking that?"
"I dunno!"
"Uh…….." He couldn't think of a good definition. What the hell did emo mean anyway?
"Well? What is it?"
"Uh………….."
"-Sigh- If you don't have an answer, I'll just go ask Deidara-Senpai…" Sasori didn't want to be stood up for that girly-ass pansy. So, he couldn't control himself, and blurted out;
"Emo equals Sasuke!" Tobi blinked.
"What?"
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"Well that's finally over…" Blue wiped her hands and stepped away from the twitching, bloody, bone-broken fangirl.
"Well, Pein, we have to go try and get the Nine-Tails again. You up for it?" Pein sprayed himself with a giant yellow spray can.
"Okay. I'm ready." Blue raised an eyebrow. Where did he get that all of a sudden, and why did he have it?
"Um…Pein, what in the bloody hell is that?"
"Oh, this is just fangirl-repellent. I borrowed some from Deidara. And Sasori. And Itachi…so I combined them into one to make a giant repellent that can repel any fangirl!" Blue sucked in her lips.
"Y'know…you could've just…thrown Itachi or Sasori at them, and they would've been okay."
"Yeah…well…shut up!" Blue dragged him off outside.
"Why are you dragging me?"
"So you can't get away when you remember what Naruto Nine-Tails form looks like." Pein tried to escape.
"OH JESUS, HELP ME! NOT AGAIN!" She struggled to get him moving.
"Pein! I swear to freaking god I will call all your fangirls in a ninety mile radius if you do not come!" Pein whimpered slightly, and stood up.
"Alright, alright…."
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OFF PLOTLINE'D!
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"Itachi, Itachi, I have a question!" Tobi ran up to the Sharingan master.
"-Sigh- Tobi, what do you want?" Tobi thought for a second on how to phrase his question.
"Well…Um…"
"Just spit it out or go away!"
"Is your brother emo?" Itachi sighed.
"Tobi..."
"Well?" He sighed once more.
"…….Yes. Yes he is, Tobi."
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"Pein, can you come faster?!" Pein slouched behind Blue. He didn't want to wet himself. Again.
"Bluuuee! I don't want to wet myself again!" He whined at her, as she closed her eyes and counted to ten.
"Then don't. You're a grown man. You can control your urine and excrement."
"Yeah, but not when you're faced with a freakin' nine-tails."
"Pein! Just do it!" He sighed and trudged on. God, why was it him who had to do everything. Pein suddenly heard something. Music. Evil, evil music that would cause a sudden and deadly convenient plot twist.
Dun…dun…
Pein looked up into the sky. Did he hear music?
"Hey, do you hear that?" Blue nodded slightly.
"Kinda…"
Dun…dun…
"It's getting louder…"
Dun…dun…dun…dun…
"Oh god…is it…is what I think it is?"
Duuuuuuuuuuuuuunn…duuuuuuuuuun…duuuuuuuuun…
"Oh god. Oh god!" He turned slowly to Blue, who said:
"They're…they're here…" Blue turned to the loud rustle in the tree.
"They're…they're…"
"FANGIRLS!"
"ZOMGZOMGZOMGIT'SPEIN!" Pein cowered behind Blue, who gritted her teeth on the fact that he was hiding behind her. AGAIN.
"The repellent isn't working! I'm going to die!" Blue rolled her eyes.
"Well…duh…" He turned to her.
"What?"
"Nothing, nothing, just turn your attention back to them."
"ZOMG PEIN! LET ME SEX U UP!" A part of Pein's soul shriveled up and died.
"Uuugghhh…No…" All the fangirls twitched. Simultaneously.
"B-But…" He pointed to Blue.
"I'm doing her."
"Wait! I still have one move left!" One fangirl shouted. She made some weird hand sign.
A log appeared.
"Oh shit. Run away!" Pein and Blue tried running away, but Pein was ultimately…
Ka-…
Wait for it…
Wait for it…
HE WAS
Ka-LOG'D!
Oh yes.
Totally worth the wait.
"OMG Pein!" Blue went over to him, but remembered the plot.
"Oh. Right. You're supposed to die. Right." She whistled as she flung his body over her shoulder, and carried him to the hideout.
ANGEL!PEIN TIME!
"Hey god, you wanna go play Resistance: Fall of Man?" God smirked.
"Hell yes."
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Ice: I'm insulting Christians. Sorry.
Oh hell yeah. PEIN GOT LOG'D!
And think TGS on the chapter. I've got the last chapter all planned out…
But am I going to tell you? No, of course not.
Because I'm just that evil.
And self-centered. Whatever…
Alas, R&R, flame for all I care.