Another Side, Another Story
Celestial's Last Order
I want to change the world
Walk again, never miss the way
Don't be afraid I'm with you
And we could fly away
If you could stay with me forever
Change My Mind
Won't get lost if your passion's true
I'm gonna fly with you again
So you could spread your wings
And you will fly with me away
I Want to Change the World- Inuyasha theme
Part Three: Kadaj, Loz, and Yazoo
(Note: This chapter is in all first-person. I think it'll be easier to describe their individual feelings that way, since this is the last time they'll be actually seen until I reach the Advent Children part. So Bold is Loz Italics is Yazoo, and Underline is Kadaj. Everybody got it? Okay, on to the siblings' last hurrah, with questions answered!)
It was strange. We had been having bizarre feelings for three days since Aniki left us. Something was wrong, but even Kadaj couldn't tell what was wrong, and his link was stronger than either Loz's or mine. So it was a fairly ordinary day, the fourth that we hadn't seen Aniki, or Reno either for that manner. Kadaj was humming idly, as Loz played with the paddleball Reno had gotten him.
"Twenty… Twenty-one… Twenty-two…" Loz muttered absently, focusing on the paddleball completely. I smiled inwardly at that. He was determined to get past fifty, if he had to sit there all day. I glanced over at Kadaj, who was still humming the same haunting tune.
"What is that, Kadaj?" I ask, knowing I'll get a strange answer. And I was right.
"A requiem for the near-angels." Kadaj said calmly, letting up on the tune for a mere moment, before resuming humming.
"What?" I said, hating it when my little brother confused me.
"Angels that aren't angels." he responded. "Angels with only one wing, but can still fly. Human angels, I guess. A simpler title would probably be "One-Winged Angel"."
I blinked. "Kadaj, do you make these things up? The song… The picture of the city…"
"Edge." he corrected blithely. "A city on Edge. And no. I see them. I see the city, I hear the song. Don't you, sometimes?" And I didn't want to admit it. Mostly when Kadaj or Aniki were around, but I could hear music from nowhere, or see things that weren't there. I had discussed it with Loz once, and he had laughed, saying that the more girly brothers had gotten the cool power, to which I responded by initiating a pillow fight.
"So what?" I asked. "It doesn't matter. We all know you hear them best, and see them best."
"Loz can't sense them at all, though." he muttered. Suddenly saddened, he looked at me and said, "Does being able to sense this stuff make me weird, Yazoo? Is that why they keep us here; because we're weird?"
I blinked. Kadaj had caught me off-guard with the question. "You're not weird, Kadaj." I said, embracing him. He snuggled close with an indefinite noise, and I sighed. "They keep us here to blackmail Aniki."
"Yazoo!" Loz cried indignantly. "Don't tell him that!"
"It's true!" I retorted, as Kadaj shifted against me. "He deserves to know!"
Why would Yazoo tell him such a thing? He's too young. He might be able to sense things we can't, but it's our duty to protect him, not give him more to worry about. He needs to just be a child, just a normal, innocent child. Not one of Shinra's lab rats.
But hell! If Yazoo had his way, he'd tell Kadaj everything. How Shinra plans to take him away from us if Aniki doesn't cooperate. It is true. They are using us as blackmail, but Kadaj doesn't need to know that. I don't want him to be scared. If Shinra takes him, they'll experiment on him. That creepy Professor Hojo implied that much. But Yazoo and I would die rather than have our little brother taken away.
I raised my paddleball, determined to get to fifty this time. But before I could even toss the ball, running footsteps were heard in the hallway.
Yazoo was up in an instant, gracefully scooping up the drawings that Kadaj had been working on and beginning to push them under the mattress. I tossed him my paddleball, which he caught without looking, and went to help.
I grabbed Loz's paddleball out of midair, as he hurried over to help me. Kadaj still clung to my waist, shaking faintly. I knew he hated the scientists. Who knew? This running could be guards, under order of the scientists to take Kadaj away.
The door flew open before we could quite hide it all. But it slammed again almost immediately. I glanced around, automatically holding Kadaj tighter, but it was Reno. He looked scared, worried, and haunted, at the same time. He stood there, back to the door, and just looked at us. I stood, gently unwrapping Kadaj's arms from my ribcage, and walked to Reno. "Reno? Are you all right?"
He just looked at me, that same haunted look in his eyes. I hugged him around his waist, wanting… no, NEEDING him to calm down, say something, anything to let me know he was okay.
His arms hesitantly came up to press me close to him. "Yazoo…" he breathed gaspingly. "How much do you love your Aniki?"
"More than anything." I said, right away. Such an obvious question, it didn't require any thought. Reno grinned at me, but without even a scrap of humor in his smile.
"He's told you about your other brothers, right? Zack and Cloud?" I remember the picture Aniki showed us of Zack-nii-sama and Cloud-nii-san. Out of my periphery, I saw Kadaj nodding in response to Reno's question. The Turk took a deep breath and continued, "You have to save them. They've brainwashed your brother to hurt them, and you're the only ones who could help."
"Nii-san…" Kadaj mumbled, walking up behind me. I wrapped my arms around him as he spoke. "Nii-sama… Aniki wouldn't hurt them…"
"What do we need to do?" Loz asked.
Wow. Reno brought us out here to the Sector 0 lift and the city's really cool! He says we have to stop Aniki from hurting our other brothers. Yazoo and Loz look worried again. Why can't they enjoy the city view? They're too serious.
"It's in Sector 4. Look for a building with graffiti all over it and a giant piece of plywood over the door." Reno was explaining. "Just, be careful, okay?"
"Thank you, Reno." I hear Yazoo whisper. He tried to smile at the Turk. "We'll come back with Aniki and you can come with us away from Shinra too." Living with Reno would be fun! He's like Aniki, only less serious. I smiled as he hugged me, and then Loz. Yazoo clung to him the longest, just absorbing as much comfort as he could.
"Sure, Yazoo." Reno said, in response to Yazoo's earlier statement. He broke away, and we walked onto the lift.
I think we're in the wrong sector. This looks wrong, somehow. We just passed a sign that says Sector 6. Uh-oh. This is Wall Market.
"Um, Yazoo?" I ventured. "We should get out of here. Wall Market isn't safe." I was worried about Yazoo and Kadaj. Kadaj would probably be fine; he was only eleven. But Yazoo…. Having not been exposed to a mirror in probably a year and a half, I don't think my brother realizes how pretty he is. He insisted on growing his hair long like Aniki's, even though (and I would never tell him this to his face) it makes him look very, very feminine. And he looks older than fourteen too. Having heard Aniki's tales of Wall Market, it's only natural I worry about him.
"What, Loz?" He turned, keeping a grip on a very enthusiastic Kadaj's hand. "I don't remember what Aniki said about Wall Market. What was it?"
"Uh…" I didn't really want to talk about some of it in front of Kadaj. Aniki had told us those parts while Kadaj was asleep. "Just…."
"Hey, babe!" Some random guy called over to us. The comment was obviously directed at Yazoo.
"Yaz…" I said warningly, as the obviously drunk man stumbled towards us. Yazoo whirled to face him, pushing Kadaj behind him.
"I'm a guy." Yazoo snapped. The man blinked, confused. Yazoo sighed, slapped the guy with enough force to send him to the ground, and resumed walking. I blinked at him a moment, wondering how even when he got mad he could seem so girly. No self-respecting guy SLAPPED another guy. They threw a punch, or a kick, or……
I am APPALLED. How dare someone mistake me for a goddamned girl! I am a GUY, dammit! I do not look like a girl.
Kadaj is way too happy for the mission we're on. But I can't blame him. I'm curious about the slums too; I just hide it better. I'm glad I made him wear that black cap. We're getting far too many strange looks because of our hair.
Something dropped onto my head, startling me. I turned, reaching for the hat Loz had put on me.
"Tuck your hair under it." he said, smiling. "Less strange looks." I did as he said, twisting my long hair into a knot under the hat. It was black; matching the black turtleneck I was wearing to hide the scar on my collarbone. I had gotten that about two months after Shinra had taken us prisoner. In a desperate bid for freedom, I had taken a pair of medical scissors and nearly stabbed some of the personnel in the lab. One of them had gotten a scalpel, and I ended up slashed before they restrained us.
Aniki asked me about the scar. He was angry when I explained what had happened. I feel sometimes like Aniki would do anything for us. If they hadn't fired that scientist after it happened, I'm sure Aniki would have made him pay. That's why we have to help him now. It's what he would do for us.
Nii-sama and Nii-san's house is cool! There are all kinds of weird drawings all over the front. It looks so different from the pictures I draw or the other pictures I've seen. All big, bold words and sharp, defined lines.
"Yazoo?" I asked, tugging on the sleeve of his black turtleneck. "Yazoo, why is the doorway broken?" A big board that had been covering the door lay shattered on the sidewalk. Yazoo tensed, drawing in a shaky breath.
"We're late." he murmured. Taking my hand and calling to Loz to hurry, he ran up the short stairs and into the house. Aniki was standing there, holding a huge sword and surrounded by SOLDIERs, facing down Nii-san and Nii-sama. Yazoo darted in between them, seeming to be a shield to keep one from the other. Loz and I followed swiftly.
"Aniki!" I cried, scared at the ferocity in his eyes. It was nothing like the way he looked at us.
"Why are you trying to hurt them?" Loz whined. Baby! Crying was not going to help. He can be a wonderful big brother sometimes, but others, he seems younger than me!
"Aniki, that's Zack-nii-sama and Cloud-nii-san. You told us about them. Why would you attack them?" Yazoo knows. Fighting and crying won't help. Yazoo always knows what to say. But Aniki's eyes were cold as he looked at us, and I shivered.
Abruptly, I was grabbed from behind by Nii-sama. He was carrying me away from Aniki! "I want Aniki; put me down!!!" I wailed, flailing, but Nii-sama held me tight and ran with determination. I caught a brief glimpse of Nii-san pulling Yazoo and Loz along behind me. SOLDIERs were chasing us!
We made it up on top of the plate. Nii-sama knew a way up that Aniki had told him about. He says we have to leave the city!
"What about Aniki?" I asked. Nii-sama knelt and hugged me tightly.
"We're leaving, because your Aniki is very sick, and we have to find a cure. You understand? Don't worry, Cloud and I will take care of you."
I nodded. "Okay, Nii-sama. We'll save Aniki together." I trust Nii-sama and Nii-san. Nii-sama grinned at us. There's a pain in my heart. He looks like Reno when he does that. Damn, we promised Reno we'd be careful. Now Nii-sama's running to go talk to some guy in a truck. Why has he got a SOLDIER emblem? It says 'Angeal' on it.
I hear Kadaj gasp inaudibly beside me, his hand tightening its' grip on my own. "An-ack…" he mumbled, surprised. I reached up, smoothing his hair, and smiled grimly. It can't be too bad, where we're going. Better than Shinra, for sure.
It's night now. We've been riding in this truck for almost twelve hours. Nii-san says we're going to Kalm. In truth, the truck's only been moving for about four hours. We left the city, and had to wait in an abysmally long line to get extra gasoline for the trip. If Shinra's so amazing, why are they still using gasoline, when it's so scarce? Haven't they figured out a way to use Mako-fuel for trucks yet? They can do it for airships and other army vehicles.
Nii-san had fallen asleep first, on Nii-sama's shoulder. He's sick, I think. Yazoo went to sleep on Nii-sama's lap. Kadaj is curled up on me, because he's cold or something.
Nii-sama stroked Yazoo's hair, not really paying attention to what he was doing. "I guess we're the designated pillows." He caught me by surprise, and I smiled. Thinking on it, I realized Nii-sama was really worried, for Nii-san because he's sick, and for Aniki because there's something wrong with him. And he's worried for us.
"Is Aniki okay?" I asked. I'm scared of the answer, but I have to know. Nii-sama looks unsure for a moment, then smiles.
"Yeah, he'll be fine once we figure out how to cure him. Go on and get some sleep, Loz. It's going to be a long trip."
"Hai, Nii-sama." I yielded. I shifted Kadaj in my arms and closed my eyes, finally going to sleep.
We're being shot at! There are SOLDIER's in a truck behind us, and they have rifles!
"Sniper!" Nii-sama yelled. "Duck!" Sniper? Why are they trying to shoot us? We didn't do anything!
I'm scared. I don't wanna die, not without saving Aniki. The scientists told us you go to the Lifestream when you die. But no one can tell us what that's like. I don't understand, so I'm scared.
Nii-sama and Nii-san are leading us up this cliff thing. You can see Midgar from here! Nii-sama's saying something now.
"Cloud, take the children and run. I'll hold them off. Head for Kalm." Nii-san looks scared too. I don't feel bad for being frightened, if he's scared too. Nii-sama's trying to comfort him. Wow, his sword is big! Nii-san could kill a whole army of SOLDIERs with that thing! Does Nii-sama mean to fight all those SOLDIERs alone?
I walked over to Nii-san, who was looking rather lost, and grabbed his hand. He looked at me sadly as I said, "Nii-sama's really brave, isn't he, Nii-san?"
He nodded slowly. "Yeah, Kadaj. Let's listen to him and head for Kalm."
Oh, Shiva, Ifrit, Bahamut! Nii-sama…. Oh, god, the SOLDIERs shot him!
"ZACK!" Nii-san screamed, sounding like the whole world was crashing down on him. He dropped Nii-sama's sword and started back down the hill. I turned to look at Yazoo, who had tears glittering in his eyes and was murmuring, "No, no one else, please…" I was abruptly jarred from my thoughts as Kadaj shrieked, "Nii-san!!!" Turning at the same moment Nii-san did, I saw SOLDIERs pouring in from behind us. Yazoo grabbed Kadaj, backing into a tree with our littlest brother held close. I spun, punching a SOLDIER who tried to sneak up on me. His plastic visor shattered under the force of the punch, driving shards of plastic into his eyes. He clutched his face and screamed, and I recoiled in horror. I had done that to him! He was going to hurt us, but he was just following orders! But the colder part of my mind insisted that protecting my brothers came first. I continued to hit SOLDIERs left and right, when there were suddenly stars in my vision and a pain in the back of my head. I fell forward, feeling blackness creeping into my vision…
Loz! The SOLDIERs knocked him out! Let him go!
Nii-san's trying to get to us, but he's holding his head. He's sick! He can't fight like that! Suddenly, there were people grabbing me, all around.
"Ahh, Yazoo!" I cried as SOLDIERs tried to pull me away. They're taking me away from Yazoo and Nii-san! NO! "GET OFF, GET OFF!!!" I screamed, struggling violently. The SOLDIER's kept a firm hold on me though, and a guy dressed like a scientist walked up carrying a needle. No more needles! I fought harder, terrified of the man in the scientist clothing, but the needle finally pricked under my ear. No, I can't sleep now! I have to… help… Yazoo and… Nii-san……
Loz has been knocked out. They can't take Kadaj too! He's yelling for me to help him, and I can't…
Needles! Oh, god, not again! No more, no MORE, dammit!
My voice went louder than it's probably ever gone. I'm the quiet one, the unnoticed one. But if you hurt my brothers, I'll fight back. I screamed defiantly at the SOLDIERS. "Not again! Not AGAIN! We WON'T go back!" I scrambled for Nii-san's sword, but it was too heavy to pick up. I won't let them take us again! After Aniki escaped, they tortured us. They thought we would know where Aniki would go. But we didn't. They used truth serum and drugs on us, needles everywhere, and wouldn't stop. If we go back now… They'll ask us about Aniki again, and they won't believe us when we say we don't know! They never do! Kadaj is frightened by anyone who looks remotely like a scientist, and hates needles beyond belief, now, all because of what they did to him! To all three of us! I'd do anything rather than have him face that again.
SOLDIERs grabbed me, tugging me towards one of their trucks. I flailed, screaming nonsense, but one coherent name escaped my lips.
"RENO!!!" The only one I could think of. Aniki was gone, Nii-sama was shot, and Nii-san was sick…… Reno got us out once, couldn't he again? As they threw me into their hateful truck, I saw other SOLDIERs capturing Nii-san, and throwing him into a different truck. As they slammed the doors, I continued to bang on them defiantly. Finally, I sat down, resigned to whatever would follow, and pulled Kadaj's sleeping form into my arms. Wrapping one arm around him, I reached out and felt the bump forming on the back of Loz's head.
Kadaj stirred, pressing closer. Sleepily, he mumbled, "Yazoo… I'm scared… Don't leave me…"
I nuzzled his hair softly. "It's all right, Kadaj. I'm here." He sighed, a sound almost conveying contentment, and snuggled close, falling back asleep as the drug they had given him took hold again. I stroked his hair softly. We'd be all right. We were all together, after all.
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It's been two years and six months to the day since we were separated from Nii-san and taken prisoner again. I can hardly believe it. I'm thirteen now. I turn fourteen in another few months. Yazoo turns seventeen after that, and Loz turns eighteen the day after Yazoo. What are the chances that their birthdays end up a day apart?
Every day is the same. We're taken by this one scientist to the lab, where Professor Hojo runs his damned tests. Originally, we were given Mako boosts once a month, but that's stopped so far. Yazoo's become a lot quieter. He doesn't say anything except to me and Loz. I think he's scared that the scientists can use what he says against him. I don't think he wants them to know how badly he hurts.
Loz… He's gotten worse. Two and a half years, and he's still stuck at fifteen. He's seventeen and a half, for Holy's sake, but something's happened to him emotionally. It's like he doesn't want to grow up. He's trying to hold on to the innocence that the scientists took from us. And I… I'm trying to be strong, but it gets harder and harder as days pass.
Nii-san is here too. I remember the first time I saw him, locked in a cell in the passage. I stopped following the scientist, and grabbed onto the tiny barred window in the cell door. Nii-san had looked at me in shock for a moment, then come over and gripped my hands through the bars.
"You're alive." he whispered. "Kadaj, oh Shiva…. Thank Holy you're alive. Are Yazoo and Loz…?" I pointed up the passage, where they still hadn't noticed my absence. The scientists had counted us as innocent children at first, and hadn't been as watchful. Nii-san's voice was urgent, as he said, "Kadaj, please listen. I don't know what they're going to do to me, to any of us, but you have to stay strong for me. Don't forget me, okay? And if I, for some horrible reason, forget you, you have to help me remember. I don't want to lose you three… Not like I've lost Zack and Sephiroth."
I nodded solemnly. "I'll never forget, Nii-san." Little did I know it would one day be a hollow promise. Shortly after he was taken and put in one of the Mako tubes. I couldn't be there to help him remember. Two years passed, and they finally put him back in a cell again. His eyes looked empty, and he stared at me without knowing who I was. That was when I knew. I had to get him out. One day, we were walking like normal, and I slowed, right by Nii-san's door. I reached out and flipped the lock to the open position, and knelt as the scientist turned.
"Kadaj? What are you doing?" he asked, starting back towards me.
"Tying my shoe!" I called to him, standing back up. His name was Kain. I liked him; he was a bit nicer to us than the others. I could only hope Nii-san understood what had happened. We went back to the room we'd been given in the mansion, since Hojo didn't want us kept in cells.
Three hours later, I got my answer. A scientist threw open the door to our little room, and stormed in. Nothing seemed amiss until I felt pain in my arm and side, and found myself lying on the floor with him standing over me.
"You little piece of shit!" he shouted. I knew him. He was one of Hojo's assistants, Edea, and was hoping for promotion if the "experiment" on us, and Nii-san, went well. "Kain told me what happened in the hallway! You let out that blonde-headed idiot!" He hit me hard, with what appeared to be a steel pipe from the lab. I felt it connect with my ribs, and winced in pain.
"Get off of him!" Loz yelled, racing over and pulling the pipe from his hands, holding it like a baseball bat. Yazoo came to me and knelt, putting a tender hand on my ribs to check for damage. He murmured something almost noiselessly, and I nodded. "I'm fine." He helped me to my feet, and watched as Loz chased Edea out of the room, throwing the pipe after him. The door slammed closed, and Yazoo pulled up my shirt to check for damage. A deep purple bruise was spreading over my side, and at least one rib was cracked. Yazoo pulled up his sleeve and took off his glove, revealing a hand that glowed faintly. "Yazoo, what is that?" He ignored me, pressing his palm to the bruise. A warm feeling, like cure materia, spread through my side, and the bruise retreated, the glow fading from Yazoo's hand as well.
"That was cure materia." Yazoo said softly. "We… I think it's because of the Mako they've injected us with, but we can absorb materia, and use its powers. I took that materia from the lab, and was trying to figure out how to hide it, when it just sank into my arm. I was wearing my gloves, so I didn't have to worry about the glow." He looked at his hand thoughtfully. "Fate dictated it was cure I picked up, and not fire or thunder. Otherwise, Edea might have had a bit of a problem. Too bad we can only use it once like this." I blinked. Was that Yazoo attempting to be funny? He said it with a deadly serious face, so I guess not.
Loz sighed. "I hope we don't get in trouble for me chasing him out like that."
"You were defending Kadaj." Yazoo said softly. "I know they probably won't care, but…. Nii-san's out now, so we must endure, until we have the chance to get out ourselves."
"I heard that they want to try some experiment with something called "Jenova cells" next week." Loz said. For some reason, the name made me shudder. I had a bad feeling, like the feelings I got before Aniki turned… evil.
"It doesn't matter." Yazoo murmured, sitting down and drawing me close. I snuggled against him, still liking to be held even though I'm thirteen now. It makes me feel safe and cared-for. And in a place like this, that kind of feeling is scarce. Yazoo ran his fingers through my hair gently, and continued, "We will just have to endure. We're all here, and we're together. There's nothing more we can ask for in this situation."
Really? Nothing? Freedom would be nice. Choices would be nice. A life would be nice! I know that we're stuck here, and I love my brothers, but I'm terrified. I don't know why. I'm terrified of these Jenova cells, and not just because of the needles I'm sure they'll use to administer them. Something's bad, but there's nothing we can do.
Getting captured was a mistake, but setting Nii-san free was not. Mistakes aren't crimes, and neither is doing the right thing. Fight the authority!
I regret nothing…
VIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVIIVII
Li: I've discovered that writing Kadaj and Yazoo is great fun. Anyone know where I got the names Kain and Edea?
And so concludes Last Order. It's back to Midgar next chapter, which I'm almost done with. I once again apologize for the extreme lateness! Gomen!