Chapter Six- Finding Peace

Dib lay in his bed, watching the digital clock on his side table closely. It was already eleven in the morning and he really didn't feel like getting up. That is, unless Zim were to come pounding at his door again.

He sat up reluctantly, tossing the blanket aside. His head hurt from all the thinking he had been doing all night. Ever since yesterday, he began to question his weird relationship with Zim. Never had he seen Zim overreact like that. Maybe their affiliation was hurting both of them.

Not to mention, Dib felt a little guilty for lying to Zim. But it wasn't like it was a huge, horrible secret. It was just a couple hours spent with Tak.

"Tak," Dib sighed. Maybe she would have some words of wisdom. He looked to the floor and saw yesterday's pants laying there. He grabbed them off the floor and pulled a small strip of paper out of the pocket. Tak had given him her number yesterday at the candy shoppe, just in case he wanted to talk.

He reached for his cell phone and dialed the number. It rang three times.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Tak. It's me, Dib," he said softly.

"Hey… you alright? You don't sound so good," she said.

"I don't feel so good," he said, rubbing the back of his neck, "Could I meet you somewhere so we can talk?"

"Yeah, sure," Tak said sincerely, "How about Starbucks?"

Dib smiled at the thought of a good cup of joe. "Perfect. In an hour?"

"Sure. I'll see you then," she said, hanging up.

Almost instantly, Dib felt a bit better. He always found it hard to find someone who would listen. And even when Tak tried to take over the Earth so many years ago, she still took the time to listen. The thought made Dib smile. Maybe he finally had a friend who really cared about him.

Dib raised his arm and sniffed his pit. He cringed at the smell and made a frantic dash to the shower.

Tak sat at the outdoor table, sipping away at some white chocolate mocha thing. When she first began training herself to tolerate earth food, she noticed coffee was particularly easy and enjoyable. It was her new favorite beverage and she found much delight in tasting different beans and flavors.

"Glad you could make it," she suddenly said.

Dib, standing right behind her, closed his mouth once again, annoyed at her perfect timing. So he sat down across from her and took a moment to really look at her. She seemed much happier for certain. In fact, her beauty had nearly doubled since yesterday. There were no bags underneath her eyes and her cheeks had lovely color. It seemed her time with Dib did her a lot of good.

Tak smiled at him and pushed a cup of coffee towards him.

"Is that for me," he asked, surprised by her gift.

"Yes," she said, sipping her own coffee.

"What kind is it," he asked, taking it from her.

"Try it and see," she said, giving him a mischievous smile.

Dib blew into the hole in the lid to cool it off. Carefully, he sipped the coffee concoction and savored its rich flavor.

"My favorite," he said, surprised, "How did you know?"

"Lucky guess," she said, smiling at his delight. "So what did you want to talk about?"

"I told you Gir! No guacamole," Zim said as he and his loyal SIR unit walked down the street, "We are supposed to be observing human relationships!"

"Why," asked the little blue-eyed robot, his mouth dripping with green dip.

"Because the Dib-Human is acting strangely and I want to know why! I have a theory that if I learn more about the humans' love rituals, I can engage him in the mating without so much drama," he explained, "Do you understand, Gir?"

Gir slurped down another bowl full of guacamole, oblivious to what had been said to him.

"Gir! Pay attention," Zim shouted. But then he stopped very suddenly and gasped. Without a second thought, he jumped behind a bush, grabbing Gir and pulling him into the hiding place as well.

"Ooo! Are we playing hide and seek," Gir asked.

"Shhh! Look over there," Zim said, peeking through the leaves.

Gir squinted his little eyes and looked in the direction that Zim was pointing. "COFFEE!"

"SHHHH! No not the coffee! Look! At that table," Zim stated, pointing at a particular table shaded by an umbrella.

Gir looked again. "It's the big-headed Dib boy! And a pretty lady!"

"Not just any pretty lady! That's Tak! What is she doing here with my Dib-human?!"

"Let's go get a karaoke microphone," Gir said with an idiotic grin.

"Karaoke? Microphone? Yes! That's brilliant! Excellent work, Gir," Zim said, extending a microphone from his pak. "Follow me!"

"So what exactly would you call your relationship with Zim?"

"Well… we aren't boyfriends," Dib said, "We don't really love each other."

"So… friends with benefits," Tak asked.

"Not even that," Dib said, holding his head, "We're barely friends as it is. The only reason we tolerate each other is to get laid."

Tak raised an eyebrow, almost embarrassed by what she was about to suggest. "So… f buddies?"

Dib blushed at the term. "I… I guess."

Tak sat back in her seat, sighing lightly. "Let me tell you something about Irken males, Dib."

He looked up at her.

"First and foremost, they live in their own little worlds all the time, make-believing they are better than everybody else, rarely admitting their mistakes. And as far as courtship is concerned, they are more eager than your earth rabbits in spring."

Dib listened and was also amazed that she had clearly done her research on earth.

"The only things they are good for," Tak continued, "are dying mindlessly for corrupt leaders and making babies."

He thought about what she was saying. It was almost insane how much sense she was making.

Zim crawled a bit closer to the table and crouched down behind another bush. He was about ten feet from them, so he carefully positioned his microphone until it started picking up their conversation.

"So what exactly do you mean, Tak," Dib asked.

"If you are looking for commitment, Zim is the least likely candidate. The only thing he will ever see you as is an easy lay," Tak stated very matter-of-factly.

Zim growled to himself hearing her slandering words. "So that's her little game," Zim mumbled, his eyes blazing.

"Maybe you're right," Dib said, not really sure he wanted to believe it. "I guess you would know more about your males than I would. I guess I've been caught in a pretty unhealthy relationship."

Zim pursed his lips together. Stupid Dib-Human! He cannot get sick from mating with me… or can he, Zim thought to himself, rubbing underneath his chin. No matter! Tak is clearly trying to divide and conquer! This must be part of her plot. I must inform the Dib-Stink of this at the next opportunity.

Zim retracted his microphone and crept away from the table silently. Once he was out of their sight, he grabbed Gir and ran as fast as he could back to his base.

"Thank you, Tak," Dib said, squinting his eyes in thought.

"Anytime," she said, "Don't ever hesitate to give me a call."

Her offer made him smile slightly. Was that last proposition a flirt or a friendly outreach? Well, what did he have to lose?

"So… what are you doing tomorrow," he asked.

EDIT: I went back and read this chapter and decided I absolutely detested it. So the one you just read is really the revised version. I changed a lot, so I'm sorry to those of you who liked the old version. It bugged me way too much.