SUEvivor.
A/N: I love reviews! Thank you if you reviewed! Hope you like this chapter.
CHALLENGE 2: THE SUES IN THE REAL WORLD, WHERE THEY HAVE TO DO THINGS THAT US NORMAL PEOPLE HAVE TO DO, LIKE CHORES.
//Sue cam in the living room//
"So, can you believe Adreana
was voted out?!" Jade the Sue asked.
"You ask that every
five minutes! Yes we can believe it because we voted her out because
she was boring!" Keanna snapped.
"I wonder what the next
challenge will be like." Rose Petal said thoughtfully, because
she is thoughtful.
"Well, what ever it is, I'm sure I'll do
just fine!" Stormy said, tossing her hair. Then she noticed the
looks everyone was giving her. "I mean...We'll all do good!"
//Harriet's
cam//
"I don't know who the others will vote for tonight, but
I'm totally going to get Sandrena out of here! She's almost as evil
as Keanna, only in a less psycho way!" Harriet thought for a
moment, then said. "I have an idea! I'm going to get Rose Petal
to vote her out, too! Rose seems pretty easy to persuade!"
//Rose
Petal's cam//
"I just feel so bad for poor Adreana! Voted out
so soon! I wish we didn't have to do such mean things on this show!"
Rose Petal sobbed. "But since I suffer the curse (and by curse
of course I mean gift) of mind reading, I know that Keanna is going
vote for me tonight//sobs// I'm sure there's a way to keep her from
doing that!
//Keanna's
cam//
"Nothing will keep me from voting Rose Petal out."
//in the living room//
"This
is sooooo boring! I want to have my boyfriends over!" Stormy
said while she chewed some gum. If it were possible, her outfit was
even smaller then the one in the last episode and she had turned her
hair flame red with electric blue streaks.
"Well, you should
be preparing your self for this next challenge!" Forrest said.
For the whole week, Forrest and the other Smart!Sues had been pouring
over books, looking for things that might help them.
The other
Sues just paid Rose Petal to read their minds and tell them
everything useful Forrest and the others had found out.
//Stromy's
cam//
"This place really bites! No boys, no TV, no alcohol,
no fun! It's only been a week and already someone stole my favorite
lip gloss, I got in a cat fight with Harriet, Vixen was thrown out a
window by Keanna, and Jade the Sue blew up the house trying to cook
something! What? You want to know if Vixen's all right? Yeah, she's
fine. She turned into a bird and flew back in here, then attacked
Keanna."
//an hour later//
"Hello,
Mary Sues." Jade the Host said as she came into the Sue Wing.
"Are you guys ready for your next challenge?"
All the
Sues nodded.
"Follow me."
Jade
the Host lead the girls outside on the Hogwarts grounds and stood in
front of the them holding a box.
"In this box, you will all
find a piece of paper with your names on them. Harriet, you won
immunity, you take get your's first." Jade the Host said, giving
her the box.
Harriet took hers, then passed the box down the line
of Sues until each one had their own paper.
"Now, open the
paper." Jade the Host insturcted
They opened them and read
what was inside with confused looks on their pretty little faces.
"You
have each been given a task that normal humans have to do all the
time. Your challenge today is to complete each task you have as best
as you can. By the end of the day, you will be judged on how well you
did it. Harriet, what did you get?" Jade the Host asked.
"I...I
have to do this thing called 'sew,' but I've never even heard of it!"
Harriet said, highly confused now.
"Of course you haven't,
your a Mary Sue and Mary Sues don't do things like sew." Jade
the Host said gently. She turned to Stormy, who was gapping at her
paper.
"I HAVE TO DO LAUNDRY?!?!?!?" she screamed. "WHAT
THE HELL IS THAT? SOME KIND OF BRITTISH TORTURE OR
SOMETHING?!?!?!"
"I did lots of laundry in my days as a
slave." Rose Petal said.
"What did you get?" Jade
the Host asked.
"I must take care of a garden." Rose
Petal said. "That will be fun!"
Standing next to her was
Keanna, who looked furious. Jade the Host tried not to laugh.
"You
think this is funny, don't you?" Keanna hissed.
"Come
on, now. What did you get?"
"I have to.. Baby sit."
Keanna spat. "I'm evil! What part of that don't you understand?!
And now you want me to take care of stupid kids!?"
"Oh,
relax. Vixen, what's yours say?" Jade the Host asked her.
She
was smiling. "I get to talk care of animals!"
"That's
not fair!" Jade the Sue sobbed.
"Oh, yeah. I'm so sorry
about this." Jade the Host said. From now on we shall call her
Jade H.
Since Jade S. was to busy crying, Jade H. told the others
what her task was. "She has to bake brownies. We hate any form
of cooking, though we do love to eat. Forrest?"
"I must
sign on to AOL on your old computer.
Jade H, winced. "Ohhh..Good
luck with that. Sandrena?"
"I..I have to clean a
bathroom!!!" Sandrena fell to her knees.
"And I have to
put together a book shelf that comes in a box!" Aradia
wailed.
"Yes you do! When we come back, we'll see the Sues
start trying to actually DO this stuff. Wow, this won't go well!"
TWINTY MINUTES AFTER THE COMMERCIALS...
//camera shows Harriet in a room with a bunch of House Elves.//
"Well, the elves have been showing me how to like, thread a
needle and stuff and how to you know, stitch things." Harriet
said. Suddenly she burst into tears. "I can't do this! I know I
can't! Why can't I defeat Voldemort or something easy?!"
//now
the camera is on a random house elf, with Harriet sobbing in the back
ground//
"Well, Mr. Camera Man, sir. We does not usually
speak ill of our masters, but this chick's freakin' crazy!"
//back
to Harriet//
//sniff// "At least they tell me I can sew
anything I want. I think I'm going to do something really
easy!"
Harriet held up a big piece of flowery
material.
"Yeah, I could turn this into a blanket!" And
with that, Harriet threw down her needle and picked a stapler and
some lacy stuff.
There were a few Ka chinks heard as she stapled
the lace to the edges of the 'blanket.' Then she held up her
'sewing.'
"Wow! That was easy!" She said as the house
elves sobbed behind her.
XOXOXOXOXO
//now
the cam is on Stormy//
"Yeah so those //beeeeep//s on the
//beeep//ing show are making me do //beep//ing laundry! Me! Do
laundry! The universe is going to explode or something now."
Stormy said as she opened the washing machine door and looked in
side.
"Well, how hard could this be? I mean, ya just throw
the clothes in and they take care of themselves, right?" Stormy
picked up a laundry basket full of clothes, some white and some not.
Recipe for laundry related disaster.
"OK, I always heard
something about separating the clothes...Oh! That must mean I put all
the stuff like shirts in one load, then all the jeans in the other!"
Then everything goes in slow motion as she tosses in a red
shirt...with a WHITE ONE.
After that happened, she poured almost
half a thing of bleach in, and half a thing of laundry soap into the
washer.
"Hmm, better put a couple of these in, too!" She
said as she dumped out a box of fabric softener stuff.
"Wow!
Doing laundry must be expensive for people that aren't rich like me,
even though I never work!" Stormy said as she sat on top of the
washing machine.
We'll come back to this later. Now...
//Rose Petal's cam//
"No one knows it yet, but I have something that will help me win today's challenge." Rose Petal grinned, showing cute little dimples. "You see, being a Mary Sue is really hard because we have to deal with all these special powers, good looks, and guys throwing themselves at us! One of my many challenges in life is that I have control over the earth. I can make things grow! That's why it should be pretty easy for me to do this challenge!"
//now we see her in a garden, but nothing has grown yet//
Rose
Petal put some seeds in the earth. On the package of seeds, we can
see the label: Worlds Rarest and Hardest to Grow Seeds That Take
Really Special Powers to Grow.
"I just picked something easy
to plant so I didn't make the other girls feel too bad. Yes, there
was already stuff planted, but it was just some simple little things.
I really want this garden to come out perfect!"
Rose Petal
finished planting the seeds. She reached down and touched each little
mound of dirt where the seeds were planted.
At her touch, huge,
beautiful flowers bloomed until she and the camera crew were standing
in a flied of rainbow colored flowers.
"You see how much of a
curse this is?" Rose Petal asked.
XOXOXOXO
// now we see through Sandrena's cam//
"
I...I have to clean this place." She whispered. Her eyes were
red from crying, but in a really pretty way.
The bathroom she's
supposed to be cleaning is already pretty clean, but that doesn't
stop her from wanting to throw up.
She had a mop, bucket of water,
and a bunch of cleaning supplies.
"Well, I guess I'll start
with something easy." She pulled out a bottle of Windex and
sprayed the big mirror.
"OH MY GOD! THIS IS TORTURE!"
She sobbed as she wiped it off with a paper towel.
Next, for some
reason or another, she decided she would (try) to mop the floor.
As
she dunked the mop in the water, she cried even harder.
Before the
mop even reached the floor, she threw it down.
"I can't do
this!" She sobbed. Then she ran out of the room.
"Wow."
said the camera guy.
XOXOXOX
//Forrest's cam//
"Well,
here I am, trying to do this thing called 'get on the Internet.' I
don't even know what the hell a computer is! But I think I can figure
it out. I'm pretty sure you just push this button." she pointed
the button that said 'sign on.'
She was sitting in front of a
computer. For some reason, the screen had a blueish tinge to it
(that's my old computer for ya. Although it was just rebooted
yesterday, so it's not as bad anymore).
There was a note on the
desk from Jade H. It said: 'A little tip. When the computer doesn't
sign on after you click 'sign on,' turn off the computer and let it
sit.'
"Wow, this thing might be more complicated then I
thought!" Forrest said. Then she clicked the button. And nothing
happened.
"Ummm...Oookay..." Forrest said, starring at
the screen.
"Oh, maybe I need to write something here."
She said as she looked at the place for a password.
"Now
what's wrong with the freakin' keyboard?!" She cried. "All
the letters are out of order! I want a new one!"
"No,
that's how it's supposed to be!" Said the camera man.
"Silly
muggles." Forrest muttered. She had been told the password
before this, so she typed it in (while having a very hard time
finding the keys) and then hit sign on again.
For about twenty
minutes she waited, listening to the weird sounds the computer made
as it connected.
Then nothing happened.
This happened three
other times until she turned off the computer.
We'll get back to
this. Now let's go back to Stormy...
//Stormy
cam//
"OMG! The clothes are done!" She ran in and
opened the
door.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Stormy screamed as she pulled clothes pink clothes out of the
washer.
"Th-they were so young! They didn't deserve to go
like this!" She sobbed over a used -to-be-white shirt.
Just
then Jade H. came in.
"I figured this would happen, so
SUPRISE! Here's your real clothes!" And she pulled out a basket
of all of Stormy's real stuff.
"What?" Stormy
asked.
"Yep, we replaced your stuff with fake ones so this
didn't happen. We really don't want you to sue us. Hehehe, the Sue
will sue us, interesting." Jade H. said, but no one listened.
"I
don't get it. What did I do wrong?" Stormy wiped her eyes.
"You
were supposed to separate the white clothes from the colored ones."
Jade H. said.
"What? You people are just crazy" Stormy
cried.
"No, your just stupid." Jade H. pointed
out.
"What's THAT supposed to mean?!" Stormy
demanded.
"Huh?! OK, Let's watch Jade S. and see how she's
doing." Jade H. said warily.
//Jade S. cam//
"OK,
Makin' brownies! Now, what do I do?" Jade S. said.
"Umm,
I guess I put this in this big bowl." she poured in what she
thought was normal brownie mix, but what the label really said was
(Poison) Brownie Mix.
All went well, until she put them in the
oven. Then she happened to look at them and see that the brownies
were starting to take the shape of a skull and crossbones.
"Well,
that's weird!" Jade S. said.
XOXOXOXO
//back
to Forrest//
From starring at the computer, her eyes looked like
this: 00
After her 27th attempt at getting on the Internet, she
turned off the computer again.
"Uh, Forrest, maybe you
should just give up?" The camera guy suggested.
"NEVER!"
Forrest screeched, turning on the computer again.
This time she
re-did all the stuff and clicked the button.
Twenty minutes later,
she was starring at the computer hopefully.
And then...
"YES!"
Forrest shrieked as the...Internet came up.
"Oh thank you
sweet, sweet computer! Thank you!" She sobbed, leaning over the
keyboard.
XOXOXOXOXO
//Keanna's cam//
Keanna
was sitting in a baby's room, surrounded by little toys, and rocking
a baby back and forth.
"That's right. Go to sleep you evil
little monster. That's right, you just wait till your asleep and your
not expecting it. Then I'll strike." She said. Then she looked
up and noticed the cameras.
"Oh, uh...I wasn't threatening a
baby or anything...What are you lookin' at?! Stop looking at me!!!"
she shrieked, which woke up the baby she was watching for her
challenge.
"Good god! You woke it!" She cried. "Oh,
no wonder my father gave me up for adoption, leaving me on the
doorstep of that really evil death eater!"
She gave up
trying to rock the baby to sleep and picked up a toy. "Look,
look at the toy! See? Nice toy! Please for the love of god go to
sleep!"
After about 15 minutes of that, the baby was asleep
again.
"Thank you! Thank you god, thank you!" She
said.
"Uhhh, Keanna?" Camera guy asked.
"LEAVE
ME ALONE! I AM NOT CRYING IN HAPPINESS!"
XOXOXOXOXO
//Aradia's cam//
Aradia sat on the floor. In front of her was
lots of little nails and screws and stuff, and a few pieces of
wood.
"I'm supposed to be building this bookshelf. That
shouldn't be too hard. I am the daughter of the greatest man ever,
and the instructions are right here." Aradia opened the
directions.
"WTF?! THEY'RE WRITEN ALL IN CHINESE!" she
cried.
"OK, OK, I can still do this." Aradia picked up a
board and stared at it for a minute. Then, without warning, she
started pounding nails into it.
XOXOXOXOXO
//Vixen cam//
"Well,
this challenge will be totally easy for me! I have to take care of a
puppy! I'm a were-wolf! This will be great!" Vixen said happily
as she made her way to go pick up the puppy at the pound.
She got
there and found the puppy. It was absolutely adorable, with big puppy
eyes and floppy ears.
"Ooooh my god! Look at the little
thing! Come here cutey. Come 'ere!" Vixen said, trying to get
the puppy to come up to her.
He waged his tail. Then lunged at
Vixen, snarling.
"HELP ME! HELP ME! GET THE LITTLE DEMON DOG
OFF!!!" The camera guys rushed in, trying to take the crazed
animal off of her.
Twenty minutes later, Vixen was sitting in a
tree as the puppy jumped up and down under her, barking it's adorable
little head off.
"I have an idea!" Vixen shouted to the
crew, who were also in the trees. She had conveniently forgot to tell
anyone, but she was also a animagus, not just with one animal, oh no,
that wouldn't be Sueish enough. No she could turn into anything she
wanted and right now she wanted to turn into an eagle.
So, Vixen
(in eagle form) swooped put of the tree, and dove on the puppy.
It
struggled, but she some how managed to force it into a puppy
carrier.
The crew finally came down from the trees.
"What
kind of demon puppy is that? Did you see what it did to Joe?"
Camera guy cried.
"I think Joe is gone." Vixen said.
"But enough about him. All the instructions said was that I have
to walk it, and feed it, and take care of it for the whole day. We
obviously can't take it out of its cage, so I'll just walk it around
town by carrying it."
"OK, but I'm staying a safe
distance away." Said Camera Guy, who was now filming from the
roof of a near by building.
OK, that's all the Mary Sues. After commercial break, we'll see how they did on their tasks.
COMMERCIAL!
END
OF COMMERCIALS!
//Jade
H. walked up to Harriet was sewing//
"So, we've seen
Stormy's sad attempt at laundry. Now we'll see Harriet's sad attempt
on sewing." she said.
They entered the room where they found
all the house elves wearing ear plugs, and for good reason: Harriet
was still crying over how hard it had been.
"Hi, Harriet.
How'd it go?" Jade H. asked her.
"Well //sniff// I
think I did pretty well for my first time. I made a blanket."
And Harriet held up the 'blanket.'
"Uh huh, I see. Harriet,
you didn't actually sew anything." Jade H. pointed out.
"Yeah,
but look! It has lace!" Harriet said, pointing to the lace.
Jade H. sighed. "OK, well, you still didn't win, so go back to
the Sue Wing with Stormy. Now let's go check on Keanna."
XOXOXOXOXO
//in
the room with Keanna//
"Well, this all looks pretty good!
You managed to not kill this little baby, and she's seems pretty well
taken care of. Was it hard?" Jade H. asked Keanna.
"What?
Was a little baby hard to take care of for the all mighty daughter of
the Dark Lord? Of course not!" Keanna scoffed.
Jade H. looked
very unamused as she picked up a remote control and pressed a
button.
A TV came down and started playing scenes from when Keanna
was taking care of the baby.
The first scene was of Keanna,
sobbing along with the baby. The next one, Keanna was trying to drop
the baby out the window. "Hey! What are you doing?!"
Demanded the camera guy as he came in.
And the last scene, Keanna
was asleep and the baby was playing with scissors.
"Well?"
Jade H. asked.
"Ummm...She's still alive and well!"
Keanna said nervously.
XOXOXOXO
//now
they're in the kitchen with Jade S.//
"Now, I know that you
hate cooking in any form, but how do you think you did on the
brownies?" Jade H. asked her.
"Um, I think I did OK."
Jade S. said as she sat the brownies in front of Jade H.
Jade H.
took a bite. "Wow! These are really good! I think you just
might-" But then she stopped breathing and fell of her chair due
to the poison brownies.
Luckily, the paramedics were there for
just such occasion and they revived her.
"I'm so sorry! I had
no idea!" Jade S. gasped.
"I know, it's OK. They're
still really good!" And Jade H. took another bite and was once
again revived.
XOXOXOXOXO
//
now we see Sandrena, looking very upset//
"So, Sandrena. Want
to tell us why you didn't do your task?" Jade H. asked her.
"I'm
//sob// sorry! I'm a Mary Sue! I'm not meant to clean bathrooms! It
was just to much!" Sandrena buried her face in her hands.
"You
know this means you can't win immunity?" Jade H. asked her.
She
nodded.
"Alrighty, then! Next up, Rose Petal!"
XOXOXOXO
//everyone
is in the garden//
"I know it's not much, but I think it's
nice." Rose Petal said shyly.
"It's..It's..It's
incredible!" Jade H. sputtered.
"Really?!" Rose
Petal's face lit up, and that combined with her natural Sue radiance
made her almost blinding.
"Really! I bet something good
happens for you!" Jade H. said.
"You mean I'll win the
game?!"
"Well, no..I meant I think you'll get immunity,
but hey! You never know! Let's go see how Aradia did with that
bookshelf!"
XOXOXOXOXO
//they
all stand there, looking at something that barely resembles a
bookshelf//
"So, did you even read the directions?" Jade
H. said dully.
"They were all in Chinese!"
"Bummer.
Well, I guess it will still hold books. Let's test it." Jade H.
sat a book on the shelf. It tumbled off.
"OK, so you pretty
much have a hunk of wood and nails. You can go back to the Sue Wing
now." Jade H. said.
Aradia nodded sadly and walked off.
XOXOXOXO
//now
with Forrest//
"Wow, Forrest! I can't believe you did it! One
of the hardest things and you manage to do it right! My Sue can't
even make non-poison brownies!" Jade H. said
"Huh?"
Forrest said, tearing her eyes away from the screen. After she got
online, she didn't want to get off and had been looking at random
stupid things for awhile.
"I said you did good. You can go
home now. Forrest? FORREST!" Jade H. screamed and Forrest
snapped out of it.
"Oh, OK. Let me just finish taking this
quiz."
XOXOXOXOXO
//Jade
H. holds the puppy, petting it//
"Oh, Vixen, stop it!
Chuckles did not try to kill anyone!" Chuckles is the
puppy.
"I'm telling the truth! He tried to eat us!"
Vixen said desperately. "What do you think happened to
Joe?!"
"Hmmm, that is a mystery. It doesn't matter. The
point is that you seemed to take good care of Chuckles during this
task. He seems happy." Jade H. said, holding up the puppy and
looking at him.
"Yeah, I did take good care of him! I should
have smacked it with a newspaper!" Vixen snapped.
Jade H.
gasped and hugged Chuckles. "How could you?! You sicken me! Now
get back to the Sue Wing!"
XOXOXOXOXO
//back
in the Mary Sue Wing of Hogwarts//
Jade H. stood in front of the
line of Mary Sues, all of them looking tired, but some how incredibly
gorgeous.
"Well, you all did pretty good on you tasks. Some
did better then others." Jade H. glared at Vixen.
"But
now, one of you will win immunity. And the winner is...
TWINTY
MINUTES LATER.
"...Rose Petal!"
"OMG! OMG!
OMG! I CAN'T BELIEVE I WON OUT OF ALL THESE WAY MORE TALENTED SUES!"
and then she burst into beautiful happy tears.
"Now, on with
the voting. You guys, follow me." Jade H. said, once again
leading them all to the great hall..
"You know what to do.
Rose Petal, you go first."
Rose Petal walked up to the
sorting hat and wrote 'Vixen,' on it.
After all the Sues had gone,
Jade H. got the hat.
She pulled out a paper. "First vote:
Vixen." There was glares all around at Vixen. News about
Chuckles had spread quickly.
" Next vote...Keanna."
Next
vote...Sandrena.
Vixen. That's two votes Vixen, one Keanna, and
one Sandrena.
Next, Sandrena.
Stormy.
Jade S.
Sandrena.
And
the second Mary Sue voted out of Hogwarts is...
TWINTY MINUTES
LATER.
"...Sandrena."
Everyone gasped and Sandrena
looked outraged.
"Ohhhh, I'll be back! Don't you worry! Then
you'll see! You'll all see!" She screamed as she stormed out of
the room.
"Mary Sues, you may return to your room now. Your
next challenge will be even harder for you."
END OF EPISODE 2.
NEXT
TIME ON, SUEvivor: "HELP ME! I'M STUCK!" Screamed
Stormy.
"Oh my God, she's about to be hit with a
watermelon!"
"Oh, God! Whose idea was it to have us do
this?! I'm gonna kill 'em!:
END NOTES: Wow, that took me long enough to write! Jeez! Thank you guys for the reviews! Please review this chapter! D
