Chapter Title: Thinking

Chapter Genre: Angst/Drama

Chapter Summary: Jou is thinking why he bothers with Kaiba, but he cannot chase away the feelings he has for him, and it's tearing him apart. Kazuya are Mai gone, will Jou be left confused in his world, or will he sober and fight his feelings, instead of being sorry for himself?

Disclaimer:I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh

Dedication:Tommylover

Reviews: Thanks a lot Tommylover for the review, I hope you like this chapter considering, your my only reviewer, Thanks so much!

Notes: I can't believe it's chapter 10 already and nothing major has happened ::groans:: it's going to be long...but you'll like it, I promise.

Tell me why I bother with a guy that'll never return my feelings: now I've figured out why, it's because I love the nut head, and you know who I'm talking about, these days it seems people keep on coming in and out of my life, even though Duke, Yami and the lights are back. I still feel really lonely, and it scares me. It's funny how I haven't written in this journal for a while, and it's very short. Sometimes I think that's how my life is gonna be. Short.

Jounouchi Katsuya

01.06.07

Jou finished with work at 6pm and headed home, to finish homework oh goody he thought

Jou's phone rang, he picked up and cradled it on one ear "Hello?"

"Hey Hon, I'm here..." Mai sighed

"Don't sigh like that, it's ok just enjoy the tournament" Jou said smiling. Mai sighed "thanks hon, bye for now..."

"Goodbye" Jou hung up the phone. Mai left after Kazuya that exact same day, and Jou really felt lonely, the apartment was so quiet without both of them. Mai of course, went on another tournament, somewhere in Tokyo. Kazuya went back to the States.

Jou sighed and packed up his stuff, he peered at the clock 8:00 damn, too early to go to sleep...

Calloused fingers picked up the small remote, to the medium sized TV and flicked it on to a movie showing on HBO. In between commercial breaks Jou made trips to the bathroom, and equally made a jumbo bag of popcorn. Later on, he slept of on the couch, he finally went to bed around 10:00pm, awaiting another filled with routines.

Kazuya stared up at the 10 million mansion, and sighed he really didn't want to be there, or he might suddenly end up missing. He reluctantly went inside, where two butlers immediately took his stuff and, a maid lead him to his boss's office.

A knock re-sounded in the dimly lit room, Kazuya entered when the door opened, and he stepped in quietly "Results" a voice said.

"Yes of course" Kazuya pulled out a laminated yellow folder, from his pouch

"I don't want to read, I want a summary"

"I'm sorry, well I did as you said, is all. The details are all in here" Kazuya meekly said, waving the folder

"Hn, alright, but if I'm not satisfied..." Kazuya immediately bowed his head. "Yes , of course I understand", and he departed wiping at the invisible perspiration that formed under his hairline. The maid led him to his rooms, he collapsed, and ended up in a restless sleep, not until about in the wee hours of the morning was he roughly pulled out of bed, completely bare.

He already knew something went wrong, and he was always the one to blame, even though he was used to this, every time he was scared, what did fate had in store for him, this time.

"So you think we should still tell them?" Bakura asked Malik.

"Nah, I just want to sit back and watch how it turns out, should be very interesting...why would you even think that?!" Marik said peering at his partner in crime

"I guess I'm little bit shocked, and excited to tell someone, and were not even to tell our lights, at least if I told them...at least it'll feel like it lifted off my chest" Bakura proclaimed, and Malik just looked at him crazy.

"Sorry, but it's just so exciting! Finally something happens when we come back! I knew I've always loved these...adventures..." Bakura smirked

"Me too" Malik smirked equally "but remember don't speak a word of what we just said here, to anyone!" Marik glared

"It's a deal!"

Jou immediately dropped off his stuff, on the kitchen counter, and ran in the bathroom. From there he entered to change from his work clothes, when he emerged from his bedroom, the blond teen looked inside his fridge, and it was almost empty. He searched his wallet for some money, luckily, he had a few yens left, just enough for grocery.

Bobbing blond head, flew in the grocery shop and out in a matter of minutes, he grabbed two paper bags full of grocery stuff, in his arms.

When Jou reached home, he unpacked it, and kept his vanilla flavored pocky aside. He was about to go do homework and munch on the pocky, when the phone rang now what? He thought, Jou didn't want to get up from the comfortable spot, he was creating for himself, but reluctantly got up.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's me, I arrived yesterday"

"That's great! I've been meaning to ask, how is America?"

"It's ok...not as great as Japan..." Kazuya muttered

"Really? I'm glad you think that...so how's everything going for you?"

"I've been fine" only if you knew...he added as an after thought

They both chatted for a few minutes, about nothing in particular, it lifted Jou's mood a little, though he noticed, that Kazuya's voice sounded a little hesitant and hoarse, as if he'd been screaming...he wasn't stupid, there was a lot that was going he didn't care to notice, when Kazuya was here. There was just something bugging him about Kazuya, it was strange, but Jou decided to ponder on it later, and resumed doing his homework, considering he had nothing better to do.

A little later on, the blond packed up all his stuff for tomorrow, and decided to visit someone that he hadn't bothered to check up on, for weeks.

Familiar white doors, opened towards Jou and he entered, a man, with a patch of graying hair, appeared next to him, adorning the same color as the doors, led him to another familiar white doors. Jou entered, his eyes searching, until he spotted, a head of graying blond hair.

He walked over and knelt down, next to the person "hey dad?"

The man didn't answer quite as quickly as the average man, he lifted his head slowly, peering into copper eyes "Katsuya is that you?"

"Yeah dad" Jou smiled "it's me, how have you been doing? You ok?"

Yet again, it took him a while to sink into the alcoholic tainted mind "Yeah son, as fine as I can be...you?" he smiled lightly.

Jou searched the dull copper eyes, and smiled "I'm glad dad, life has been as good as it can be...with my situation..." his dad's eyes lowered, and he started crying. Jou felt bad for saying the last part and hugged his dad "I'm sorry dad, truthfully it's been bad since you know..." Jou's dad seemed to be bawling even more, and Jou squeezed him tighter, trying to be strong for himself and his dad.

Jou left his dad shortly, it seemed since his sister died, Jounouchi Senior, drank even more so. After the beatings got worse, and Jou's doctor found out that his dad mistreated him, Jou was sent into a foster home, a year ago, when he turned 18, Jou ordered for an emancipation, now he lived alone, and his dad was put in a rehabilitation center, for severe alcoholics. Jou visited his dad at least one or twice a month.

The blond man sighed, I really don't wanna be thinking about this right now, it's just too sad...

When he arrived home, he went into his bedroom, to check his cell for any missed calls. None. Who was I actually expecting to call me?

Jou emerged from his room and was about to drag himself into the living room, when a black ball of energy seemed to appear out of nowhere, and attacked him.

"Hi Jou!"

"What's up Mokuba?"

"I'm great! How are you doing?"

"I'm fine, how did you get in here without me knowing? And why are you suddenly so hyper?" Jou asked, a brow raised.

Mokuba suddenly clamped his mouth shut and looked like a frightened kitten, Jou came closer to Mokuba's face, and leaned into his face and smelled his breath. "Have you been eating my vanilla pocky?" Jou asked, his honey eyes narrowing, in suspicion. Mokuba again didn't say a word, and bolted. Jou easily caught him. "Ok! I'm sorry, I'll never eat it again! Seto banned me from anything sugar related! And I came in here, when you were inside your room! I'm sorry" Mokuba proclaimed. Jou released Mokuba's collar and knelt next to the lump on the floor "why are you here? I thought you were grounded..."
"I am, I sneaked out!" Jou's eyes widened "To come here?! Are you crazy?"

"I'm sorry, but I was soooo bored, he took everything from me! And I'm supposed to be grounded for two months!"

"I'm sorry Mokie" Jou said hugging the little bundle of energy, close. Mokuba eventually came down from his sugar high, and started letting out little sniffles, repeating the phrase "it's not fair!" over and over again, while he cried into Jou's chest.

"I'm sorry Mokuba, I understand how it feels to get everything you want in life, and got it taken away, by one incident, even though this is in a small scale, it's almost the same thing"

Teary filled onyx orbs peered at Jou "really Jou what happened?" Jou sighed,and led Mokuba to the couch were he explained the tragic death of his sister. Mokuba renewed his crying session after the sad tale it seems like I keep on saying the wrong things these days...

After the crying session Mokuba, they watched a little bit of television, trying to cheer up the mood, and it successfully worked. Mokuba and Jou laughed, smiled and giggled here and there and the tense atmosphere was now uplifted. Mokuba looked at the time, and suddenly bolted of the couch, ready to go home. "Oh my god! Seto's gonna kill me! He'll be back in 30 minutes!"

Jou smiled at Mokuba and told him to calm down "I'll handle your brother, and run if we don't get there on time"
"Oh thanks Jou, that totally helped..." Mokuba sarcastically input and rolled his eyes.

Mokuba called the Limo, and it picked them up, there was little traffic, while Jou was playing with buttons, Mokuba was freaking out.

"Calm down! I told you I would handle your brother!" Mokuba straightened up, and finally managed to sit down.

They barely made it, it was 11:31 before they arrived, and of course Kaiba being the courteous person he was, arrived at 11:00 sharp.

"Where were you, Mokuba?" Kaiba demanded narrowing his pupils, making it even smaller, if that was even possible.

Mokuba stuttered, but Jou stepped in and intervened "Kaiba leave the child alone! Mokuba go take whatever it is you need and run to your room, cause I hardly doubt, Moneybags here will let you out at anytime..." Jou said

Kaiba's eyes glared at the blond haired before him "how dare you make him disobey my orders?! And in my own house? I don't think so! Mokuba get down here this instant!" Kaiba bellowed

Mokuba frighteningly emerged from the kitchen "yes seto?"

"Mokuba don't mind your brother, go back to doing whatever it is you were doing, I'll handle him!" it seemed Jou's temper got the better of him.

Mokuba finished what he was doing in the Kitchen and ran into his room locking his door.

"How dare you Jounouchi?!" Kaiba glared "Kaiba you know what? Fuck you! How can you treat him like he's one of your workers? He's your brother, have you tried remembering that, he's your brother!" Jou bellowed

"Don't talk back to me Jounouchi, remember who's house your in, I could easily throw you out!"

"I don't care what you do to me, because whatever I say right now until you kick me out, will have some impact on you!"

Kaiba was quiet before he quickly retaliated. "Jounouchi what gave you the idea that anything you can say will affect me? You, mutt are sorely mistaken"

"It should,and if it doesn't Kaiba then your even colder than I thought! Mokuba is your brother, treat him as best as you can! Some people don't have the luxuries you have! Some people don't have siblings who love them and will do anything for them! Without anything in return, Some people don't have what you have Kaiba, and your so full of yourself, that you don't even notice that your everybody's dream! Good Looks, Wealth, Sibling(s)! Think about it Kaiba!"

With that last comment Jou said, he departed, and left a baffled Kaiba.

Later that night, after Kaiba actually thought about what the mutt said, he knew it was true, he just didn't want to acknowledge it. Kaiba knocked on Mokuba's door twice and no one answered, so he picked the lock and strode in, and sat at the edge of the bed, listening to the pelting rain outside.

"Moku-Mokie I'm so sorry, the past few days has been tough on me, and I shouldn't have taken it out on you and I'm sorry, forgive me? I know your probably asleep, and my pride always gets in the way, when I try to apologize, but for you, anything. I'm sorry Mokuba, I hoped you heard what I said," Kaiba looked at Mokuba's sleeping face "probably not, but do forgive me" and with those parting words, left the boy to sleep.

Mokuba popped open an eye, and smiled "I forgive you Seto" he whispered before falling into a blissful sleep.

Kaiba was about to go to bed, when he noticed, it was raining really hard outside, he started to worry for the mutt I wonder if he's still outside especially in this pelting rain...ah, why do I even care what happens to that mutt? But that speech was wowing, though...never knew he had that much brain cells to come up with that...but it seems, there was more to it than meets the eye...but what do I care? It's the mutt with those last thoughts, Kaiba tried going to sleep, but flashes of what might happen to Katsuya, swimmed through his head. Kaiba bolted out of bed hurriedly put on some jeans and a t-shirt, and grabbed an umbrella. He didn't bother with a limo, so he entered the cheapest car, he had: a dark blue BMW.

He saw the mutt, crossing the border line to downtown, how he walked all the way baffled him, but then again Jou was baffling him a lot these days, hold on did he just call him Jou? He mentally shrugged, and pulled up next to Jou.

The blond man didn't stop, Kaiba sighed raggedly and wound down the window "Mutt, get in the car"

Jou flinched, and reluctantly entered the car "Kaiba why would you do this?"

"Don' t ask mutt, because I don't have an answer, just take it as a favor"

Jou was confused favor, for what? But didn't dare voice his thoughts.

When they reached the shabby apartment building, Jou thanked him and quickly entered his house.

Kaiba didn't expect anything more from the mutt, but the thanks kind of blew him of. He accepted this day has turned out to be one of the most confusing days of my life...was his lasts thoughts before going to sleep.

TBC