After that, Zoro walked out of the room, down the hall, out the door of the inn, and into the now darkening night. People were everywhere. He darted through the crowd and made his way up the road. The cook was still in his room, he supposed, so he couldn't be there. Didn't want to be with anyone else. He followed the dirt road as it led out of the town and up a hill, which then split off into three roads; to the dock, father into the island, and to a small inlet cove that fed a small stream that weaved through the whole of Atad. It was going to get chilly soon, but he decided to take the road down to the cove. It was deserted as everyone else was at the festival. He told himself that, as soon as the sun set completely, he'd go back. Sanji would be gone by then.

Fucking doctor's orders.

Sanji watched numbly as Zoro left, leaving his swords behind.

Sanji wasn't sure he'd ever felt worse in his life. Which was how he was sure Zoro felt about the entire ordeal. How was he supposed to have known the swordsman had to bear something like that? How was he supposed to feel?

He hated that it had ever happened. He was angry, at the ones who did, and at himself, for causing Zoro to have to relive it.

"Who knows where you've been, you dirty-"

Sanji felt sick. He put his hand over his mouth and crouched down.

This is all my fault. What he did to me, what he nearly did to Nami... my fault. My fault. I should be the one being punished.

He just let me kick him around like that...

What am I supposed to say to him that won't make it worse?

How could he bear it?

Sanji's breathing was getting fast and he sat down on his knees. He told himself to calm down and not think about it too much, but images of what it might have been like kept running through his head. How he would have dealt with it. How he would feel, what he would have done.

7 years old.

He closed his eyes and fought off the bile rising in his throat. Unknowingly, Sanji had far outdone Zoro in 

doing what was unjustifiable.

I just shoved it in his face-

"Sanji?" Chopper interrupted his thoughts as he poked his head through the door. Sanji started.

"Chopper-"

"I thought it would be something like that." The little reindeer whispered sadly.

"What?" Sanji said.

"Well, I thought it would be something like that. He had all the classic warning signs that day. Zoro isn't typical, so I hadn't suspected it before now. He's very strong... it's unfortunate that this is his latent reaction." Chopper said, sitting down next to the chef. "I didn't actually mean to over hear, I just wanted to be nearby in case Zoro lost control again. He's going to need counseling."

"Ch. He wouldn't need it if I hadn't..."

"You didn't know, Sanji. You had no idea. You can't blame yourself. But now you know what not to say, what lines not to cross." Chopper said with wisdom that belied his few years. "Zoro won't appreciate being treated delicately, it's been hard on him these past few days, but I think that if you show some understanding, he might react well to it. It was probably very hard for him to tell you. He let himself be vulnerable to you. It might have been that he thought he had nothing to lose, but it might also mean that he trusts you in someway, even if he doesn't know it himself... Just think for a moment how you would feel if you told Zoro about a time when something happened beyond your control. Something you could do nothing to stop or prevent."

I would feel weak.

Especially if I told him.

Sanji sighed. "You won't tell everyone, will you?"

Chopper shook his head. "No. It's his decision to tell people. But I'm afraid that now that we know, we might be responsible for making sure this doesn't happen again. Who knows when Usopp or Nami might accidentally slip up and say something and Zoro snaps again? This isn't his fault, he shouldn't be sent away or punished for it. But I don't want to think that I'm going to have to used up my sedative supply."

Sanji smiled half heartedly.

"I'll take care of the marimo-head. Just leave it to me. This is my fault anyway."



Sanji wasn't a martyr. But he knew when he had made a mistake. Even if that mistake wasn't conscious, he knew when he should be responsible for it.

So that's what he was doing.

Being responsible.

Which was why he was carrying that stupid marimo head's swords down to the cove, where Chopper told him Zoro's scent had trailed off.

Sure enough, there the big ape was, just standing their in front of the endless ocean, staring off into the last oranges and purples of the sunset.

Fucking glorious view.

Sanji lit a cigarette and made sure to make plenty of noise on his walk down to the little beach. He stopped just a few feet behind the swordsman and thrust out the swords.

"Forgot these, dumb shit."

Zoro turned around. His face was impassive as he took the swords and attached them underneath his haramaki.

"Thanks."

Sanji took a deep drag on the cigarette before throwing it into the damp sand he was standing on and stamping it out.

"I'm the one who owes you an apology, Zoro. If you'd have fucking told me that to begin with, this wouldn't have been a big deal, shit-for-brains. That's rough. I don't know what I would do. But now I know, and I won't say anything like it again."

He saw Zoro's shoulders stiffen more and more as he spoke.

"I'm not weak."

"Never said you were, ass hat."

"You're thinking it."

Sanji threw his hands up. "Well thanks for fuckin tellin me! Had you not, I wouldn't have known how I feel! I don't think you're week, dumbass! If I did, I'd feel sorry for you! As it is, I'm just pissed at myself for being such a fuckin jack ass! You were kid! Now you're like... one of the... fuckin... shit, Zoro, you're up there with Luffy... I don't know..." Sanji ended lamely.

Zoro turned around and looked at him like he was a neurology patient.

"Was there a point to that?"

Sanji glared. "I'm just sayin, it doesn't change how I feel about... how I think... how I see you god damn it. Shit happens to people. None of us deserve it. It wasn't your fault, it doesn't make you weak, and I'm sorry I said what I said! Will ya be normal now for fuck's sake?!"

It was dark now and the wind was picking up. Sanji shivered.

Zoro grunted and made to start back, but Sanji grabbed his shoulder.

"Tell me one more thing, Marimo."

"What, shit cook?"

"Why did you yell at Nami?"

Zoro had thought long and hard about that too. To begin with, he had been a little insane at that point, but also very, Zoro shuddered, emotional. He figured it had something to do with wanting to constantly pin Sanji to a wall and do things to him, but Nami always had the damn love cook around her finger. Might have been something akin to jealousy. Or as close as he was going to get to over a love sick perverted cook.

"Ah... that was nothing." He started walking again, but found his feet swept out from underneath him. He landed hard on the sand. "The fuck asshole!?"

Once again, Sanji's foot was back on Zoro's chest. "You should know not to fuck with me when it comes to the ladies. What.was.that.ABOUT?"

Zoro choked on his breath. He gasped a few times before he was able to speak. "What if I told you it was just something else you'd regret hearing?"

This seemed to cause some hesitancy is Sanji.

"Doesn't matter. I already told you, ass hole, nothings going to change."

Zoro smirked. "Oh really."

"What? Don't trust me shit head? Aren't we nakama?" Sanji said, bristling at Zoro's attitude.

"Let me up and I'll tell you." Zoro said, still smirking. Sanji didn't like what he saw behind Zoro's eyes. There was something other than a bad attitude. Fear. Zoro was still afraid that whatever he might say might change things. Sanji would just prove the bastard wrong. He moved his foot and offered the shit swordsman a hand up. Zoro accepted it and brushed the sand off him.

"Well?" Sanji said, palming another cigarette and lighting it. Zoro muttered something then turned to go.

"Oi! You said you would-"

"I never said I'd tell you right here and now." Zoro said, retreating back towards the village.

"You'll tell me before we leave this island if you ever want to eat again you dumb bastard!" Sanji called after him.

The two men found their way to the festival in time to see Luffy pass out after eating his 729th piece of meat. They townspeople had been cheering him on, heedless of Usopp's 19,876th tale of the Great Captain of the Seas. Robin and Nami were sitting next to Chopper around a huge bonfire that had been lit in the town circle. They were drinking and talking loudly along with several other villages. Chopper kept holding his mouth to keep from laughing loudly.

Zoro wasn't sure he was ready to sit amongst all this noise and commotion, but Sanji elbowed him towards Chopper and the girls and handed him a mug of something to drink.

"I'm not allowed-"

"It's just juice, idiot. Go siddown." Scowling, Zoro sat next to Nami, who was blushing madly and giggling. Apparently she was a little drunk. Robin was sporting a pretty little rouge as well.

"Ah, you ladies look so lovely this evening! The fire dances on your skin, your beauty is exponentially increasing by the moment!" Sanji cooed, sitting next to the swordsman.

"Zoro! WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING?!" Chopper said shrilly.

"It's just juice, Chopper." Zoro said calmly. He too was trying not to smile, because Chopper's fur had puffed up, making him look like a fuzzball with a blue nose and antlers.

"Oh..." He said, embarassed.

Zoro, for his part, just tried not to think too much about anything and quietly enjoyed the evening. He grunted every once and a while, threw an insult or two the stupid cook's way when it was warranted, and tried not to get himself spotted by that overly giggly village girl who had asked about his marital status earlier. Robin seemed to be going out of her way to get him spotted by said girl. By 4 am he had made it without incident, and he, Robin and Chopper helped Nami, Sanji, Usopp and Luffy stumble back to their rooms. It was helpful with all of Robin's limbs. Poor sport for him, not being drunk, but it just meant that he wouldn't wake up with a hang over in the morning.

It took those two full extra days to get everyone back to proper health. By then the log pose had set, and he was playing mule to some last minute shopping on Sanji and Nami's part. At least Sanji had bothered to come. Nami just sent them with a list and threatened to double his debt if he made a single mistake.

He was in the middle of trying to balance a huge bag of spices on top of a heavy box of map sheets when Sanji said, "You've got about an hour and a half to spill it, marimo, or you're never eating again."

"Che. Still going on about that?"

Sanji sucked on his cigarette and eyeballed some fruit. "I'm not gonna risk it again, shit head. You either tell me what's going on in that pea brain of yours, or you starve."

Zoro remained silent and sulky through the rest of the shopping. Sanji continued to threaten him with things beyond starvation. They made it to the dock and Zoro began unloading all the supplies on the ship.

"I'm serious Zoro. The moment we lift anchor-"

"Will you give it a fucking rest, shit cook?!" Zoro growled. "Just let me put this shit up and we'll talk our fucking heads off all you god damn want!" The swordsman stomped in the galley with the packages. In truth, Zoro had that quivery feeling in his stomach that made one feel kinda week and uncontrollably twitchy at the same time. He didn't mind lying this time, he just couldn't think of a good excuse.

Zoro jerked slightly when he heard the door shut behind him. Sanji stood there with the rest of the supplies, tapping his foot impatiently.

The swordsman rolled his eyes and sighed, putting his armfuls of supplies down.

"Why are you itching to know so bad anyway? Me and the she-demon are fine now. I apologized. I already apologized." He said gruffly, crossing his arms again the way he did that day in the inn. Sanji put down his stuff as well.

Sanji's vein above his eyebrow was starting to throb dangerously. "Do you wanna eat, or not?" He ground out.

"I was mad at her because of the debt."

Sanji's jaw dropped. "For that... for THAT? FOR THAT YOU MADE A VIOLENT ADVANCE TOWARDS HER? FOR THAT YOU YELLED AT HER?! FOR THAT, ZORO?!"

Zoro shrugged. "Never said it was a good excuse."

Sanji's eyes narrowed. "I don't believe you."

Zoro made a "geh" sound and scratched the back of his head. "You don't have to believe me."

Sanji advanced on Zoro. "Oh ho ho yes I do. You have to make me believe you because until I'm sure Nami and Robin are safe, you-"

"Fuck that! THAT'S the god damn problem to begin with you shit head!" Zoro yelled, and got up in Sanji's face. "You're all fucking over that woman and she couldn't give a damn about you! Take a fucking hint, moron! She doesn't want you! Maybe you should pay attention to someone that does for once!"

Sanji grabbed Zoro's collar,yelling just as loudly. "OH YEAH? LIKE WHO?"

"LIKE ME, ASSHOLE!"

Silence.

Sanji still had a hold of Zoro's shirt. His eyes were wide in shock, astonishment, or something.

"What... did you just say?"

"Told you you wouldn't want to hear it." Zoro said, waiting for that moment of rejection he hadn't recieved from sensei, but knew he would get here.

This time everyone really would hate him. Sanji really would think he was dirty. He might really even kill him.

Sanji's grip got tighter. "That's not what I asked you. I asked you to tell me... what you just said."

Zoro looked away. "Che. I said like me, asshole."

Sanji released the swordsman with a shove. He stomped out the galley door without another word.

Zoro didn't want to fall, that would be pathetic. He didn't want to move either. So he just stood there, kind of looking at the floor. A moment later Sanji stormed back in, a fresh cigarette in his mouth.

"You said WHAT?" He looked at Zoro expectantly.

Zoro wondered slightly is Sanji had gone off the deep end as well.

"I said-"

"I know what you said! I'm not stupid!" Sanji began pacing the galley. "Why? Why did you say that?" He said in an accusatory manner.

Zoro gaped stupidly for a moment before managing to get out, "Because I meant it, you ass!" Sanji stopped pacing and looked at him again. Something seemed to dawn on the cook.

"Oh ho ho. Clever my friend. But no, that won't work. You had me there for all of five seconds, you shitty liar. Now tell me the truth!"

This was insulting. If Sanji was going to kill him, he better get on with it. No more bullshitting around. But now the ero-cook was accusing him of lying about something like this?

"You fucking son of a bitch! I'm not lying you idiot! Why would I lie about something like this!? You think I'm stupid? You punk ass piece of rotten shit! I've been in love with your shitty face since Arlong Park! You think I'm lying? Fucking try me, Sanji! Just you fucking try me!"

Sanji threw his cigarette away. "Why the hell should I believe you, you shit face!"

Cliches aside, Zoro closed the distance between them, fisted his hands in Sanji's jacket, and kissed him fiercely. He didn't even wait for a physical consent before thrusting his tongue into the cook's mouth, which, he noticed, tasted like how he thought an ashtray might taste. He slid on of his hands through Sanji's hair and cupped the back of his head, keeping it angled at just the right position to shove his tongue as far down the smug, annoying cook's throat as he could get. Maybe if the idiot cook believed that Zoro wasn't lying, they could get the part over with where he was either killed, hated, or thrown off the ship by Luffy.