Author's note: First off, I just wanted to thank everybody for reading and reviewing this fic... you made me and my muse really happy :-) I'll probably post the last chapter by Friday, so you won't have to wait too long for the last letter.

One of you asked me if there was going to be a resolution or some kind of chapter where Lucas would confront Brooke about the letters… I won't post any additional chapter in this fic, but I am seriously thinking about writing another story where Lucas would eventually find the letters and confront Brooke about the way things happened during senior year and the way she feels about him (and the way he feels about her!). The thing is that I don't want it to be a one-shot because I think there are far too many issues to be dealt with. So if the muse cooperates and if I have enough time on my hands (I'm about to move across the globe in two weeks so it's going to get crazy!), I will definitely write that fic. It's been on my mind for a while anyway, I just have to actually start writing it :-)

But anyway, I'll stop venting. I hope you enjoy the letter!

85

Lucas,

It's funny how there were so many moments during high school when I wished I could be anywhere but here, and instead fast forward to a time in the future when everything would be finally be alright. But as we all separated on the river court last night I felt something change in me, and now I wish I could go back to the safety of the past four years – walking down the halls with Peyton, being a cheerleader, getting half-naked in the back of your car, going away for a week-end with my group of best friends.

The truth is I'm scared.

I'm scared I won't find my way; I'm scared everyone has their path marked down in front of them when I'm just eternally going to stand still with no direction to guide my steps.

You held me in your arms last night and for a brief moment it seemed like everything was going to be okay. That moment is long gone by now. The air is cold again and your arms have gone back to the place your heart now calls home – Peyton.

You said I was brilliant and beautiful and brave. You wrote those words in your book and they are now forever printed in my heart. The irony is that without you, I wouldn't have been half of these things. Sometimes I hate you for it, sometimes I am grateful. But it doesn't change the fact that you shaped the person that I am.

If I change the world someday, it will be because once upon a time, when you still loved me, you changed me into someone that could. I'm not saying I can't live without you or I can't be without you. But you make me a better person, Luke. You always have, for better or for worse.

I couldn't sleep last night because my mind was too full of memories to sleep or even close my eyes. All I could do was reflect on the last four years and how they have changed me and made me grow more than anyone you have ever known. I'm proud of how far I've come. I just wonder how much farther I can go.

I'm going to miss you, Lucas Scott. I've missed you for a while now, but moving across the country will just make it more real, more definite. And as I am sitting at the airport, waiting for my plane for LA to board, I know now more than ever that I am not ready for that. I wish you could stay in my life longer. I wish we could be friends like before.

I don't know how to say goodbye to you, Luke. I already didn't know how a few months ago, when we broke up. I even came back to you a few weeks later because the pain was overwhelming and I thought for a moment that maybe I could forget about Peyton's feelings and just take back what I had given up.

But as I listened to Whitey's speech that night, it occurred to me that while he was describing my feelings for you, he wasn't describing yours. When I said that trying to get back together was a mistake, you agreed. When I walked out of your life, you never fought to get me back. And as I watched Peyton during that night, I could see how much it hurt her to watch us together, and no matter how much I missed you, none of it mattered anymore. I let you go again.

And tonight, as the three of us walked into the airport, I didn't know how to say goodbye either. I stood there, frozen, my plane ticket in one hand, my heart in the other. The way you looked at her made me feel like my own hand was gripping it and crushing it until all that was left of it were scattered pieces on the ground. I had to get out of there so I just grabbed my bag, said a few words that probably made no sense, hugged you without even looking at you and walked towards the gate as fast I could. I went through security with my eyes full of tears and I didn't look back, afraid you would see them and understand.

I hope you have a good life, Luke. I didn't know how to say goodbye, but as we separate tonight, I want you to know that I wish you all the happiness in the world. I hope you become the next great American writer and you get your book published soon. I hope your heart keeps on beating in your chest the way it should. I hope that one day you can look back on your memories with Keith and finally feel like the pain has lessened. I hope all your dreams come true over the years and that the one person you love will stand beside you to share them with you.

And selfishly, I hope you never forget about me. You know, Brooke Davis, Cheery, Pretty Girl – the girl you used to picture standing next to you when all your dreams come true.

But anyway. I'll see you soon, Broody. Hopefully.

Brooke