A/N- Well its about 8 weeks since me and Ellie (visit her and Oli at wheres-my-life-gone, if you like randomness your sure to like change of events and events still changing (btw you two where's my advertisement in yours) (Ellie: your going to be in the story isn't that good enough for you) (no)) but I updated and corrected like 2 minutes ago, basically I saw it on my profile page and decided to get off my backside and write another chapter. Woo just as I said that Ellie logged in on MSN she can help RIGHT ON WITH THE STORY. Oh by the way same as last chapter when a character talks like this he/she is talking to themselves (the first sign of madness dontcha know) (Ellie: n tlking to your brain is the second n writing as your brain is the 3rd crap im crazy) (lol yeah we all know that hun)
Chapter 2- The Journey muahahahahaVoldermort jumped to his feet, displacing his fluffy white cat in the process, it gave a howl of protest as it landed heavily on it's backside(hmmnn aren't cats always supposed to land on their feet (shrugs) ah well)
"oh snuggles did daddy hurt you, did he, did he aw he's a naughty man, naughty man, cootchi cootchi coo"
Lucius coughed. Voldy looked up from kissing his cat on the nose.
"Oh yes, errm well stand tall, eyes on the horizon" Voldy barked orders at the line of men in front of him whilst trying to regain some dignity "Petigrew, straighten that hood, look sharp men, look sharp. Eyes right and left, right, left, right, left , right HALT!" Voldemort stopped his men in front of the door whilst he rushed round checking windows and bolting doors, he dropped his ring of keys into a handbag along with a mobile, portable computer and a purse and grabbed a black and white fur coat off the coat rack, overall he looked strangely reminiscent of Cruella Deville ( I mean the bad guy out of 101 Dalmatians btw, it probably isn't spelt right.) He sashayed out of the front door his men marching out behind him. (I don't give a shit if this isn't what soldiers actually say by the way, this is my world keep out)
Dumbledore sighed as the 175 bus rolled into yet another stop, Bloody British transport system I've been on this bloody bus for an hour already and if the scar on my knee is anything to go by (yes I know full well the scar on his knee is of the London underground but for the purposes of this story lets pretend its actually of the Huddersfield bus network) there's still another 25 ½ (how you get half a stop I don't know, ask Dumbledore, he's the wizard) stops to go. He stared out of the window, It was just a normal Saturday night, woman getting mugged, chavs having a fight, a drive-by (Ellie: woo), Voldy and some minions waiting at the bus stop, a pair…WTF VOLDY. What the hell is Voldy doing braving the public transport system, as if that guy hasn't caused me enough problems, the slaughtering of my minions is bad enough but I still haven't forgiven him for that whoopie cushion he put on my chair when he was at Hogwarts. There again he does look pretty sensational in that coat. Dumbledore felt himself becoming aroused. WTF WHO WRITE THIS SHIT?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Dumbledore heard sniggering coming from above him, he stood and threw open the door to the baggage rack (ok I know they don't usually have baggage racks in buses but this is artistic license) to reveal a 15 year old girl with shoulder length blonde hair and glasses crammed, along a white Packard Bell pc (my laptops screwed, I was desperate (Ellie:mine too)) into the tiny space typing manically on the keyboard. She turned to stare at him, waved manically and let out an evil cackle before slamming the door on his fingers. Stupid inconsiderate little bi…good guy image. He sighed and turned just in time to see the dark lord board the bus.
"What do you mean you don't take Galleons, they're real gold dontcha know?"(Ellie: are you Jamaican?)(yes yes I am Voldemort bit one of the coins to prove his point but only succeeded in breakin a tooth.
"I'm sorry sir, if you do not have the correct change I'm going to have to ask you to disembark"
Voldy drew himself to his full height "Do you not know who I am???" he demanded
"Sir, you can be the queen of Sheba for all I care, no fare, no ride" He got out of his cab in order to escort the troublemaker from his vehicle.
"YOU DARE TO CHALLENGE A LEVEL 144 DRAGON MASTER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" Voldemort yelled in the unfortunate mans ear (my friend yelled this at a chav who tried to start a fight with him, it was hilarious) He fell back in shock and let go of Voldy's arm. "I thought not, come on boys, bloody muggle transport is more trouble than its worth" with that Voldermort, the dark lord, the most powerful wizard the world had ever seen swept off the unworthy muggle mode of transport, the effect was severely damaged when he tripped over his fur coat and fell flat on his face on the pavement. "Well that was funny" Harry said before being hit on the head by a frying pan.
"What I wanted in on the story" Ellie said putting the frying pan back on her bag turning around and hitting Ron in the face with her hair (Ellie: its long enough to do that it can also hit me in the face all the way round)
A/N- Lol what d'ya think, good bad let me know READ AND REVIEW. Oh I forgot the disclaimer nothing you recognize is mine is mine but I'm guessing you already knew that anyway I'm handing this over to Ellie for her to add her wisdom/craziness right now so goodnight and good luck (btw that is one of the worst films I have ever seen)