Chapter Eight

Catherine waited impatiently for Grissom to answer the phone; her foot tapping anxiously on the floor, and fingers drumming on the kitchen counter.

When the call finally connected, she spoke before he had even managed to finish his greeting.

"Gil, is Lindsey with you?" she asked, voice shaking with panic.

Her entire body relaxed when he confirmed that she was.

"She just arrived. She came to see Andrew -"

"Oh good," she said. "Sorry if I was a little abrupt… She was gone when I woke up and – "

She paused when there was a knock at the door.

"Sorry, Gil, someone's at the door, can you ask Lindsey – "

"Catherine, Andrew isn't here…" Grissom managed to interrupt her.

"What?"

"I'm assuming it could be him at the door."

Catherine rolled her eyes, but couldn't help smiling. "Kids!… Hold on…"

She moved through to the foyer and opened the front door.

"Andrew! Hi!" she said, over-smiling and shaking her head. She signalled for him to come in and put the phone back to her ear. "Yeah, it's him…"

"I'll bring Lindsey over," Grissom offered.

"Are you sure?" she asked, reminding herself that he wasn't as much a part of her life as he used to be, and he didn't have to be involved in all of this.

"Yes," he said simply, and she could hear the smile in his voice. "We'll see you shortly."

"Thanks, Gil," she said then, disengaging the call, she turned to Andrew. "You two make a great couple… Lindsey is at Gil's hotel to see you."

Andrew's eyes widened. "What?"

"Gil's gonna bring her over… Have you eaten?"

"No… I really needed to see her…"

"Well, you're lucky she set out to see you… because, otherwise, I wouldn't have let you in… You were supposed to wait 'til she was ready Andrew."

"Maybe I sensed that she was?" he said, with a slight smirk.

Catherine smiled. This was more like the Andrew she knew. "Nice try… Come on, you can help me fix us all some breakfast while we wait."

-----

Most of the journey from the hotel to Catherine's house was made in silence, the only sound the quiet music drifting from the radio.

To make conversation, Grissom tried to discuss the complexities of making the journey to the hotel by bus, but Lindsey shrugged it off as nothing, saying she hadn't wanted to disturb Catherine.

After that, Lindsey turned her face to the world outside; her young features creased in worry. Her fingers tapped nervously on her thighs as Catherine's had done the evening before, and Grissom smiled, wistfully, at the similarity between mother and daughter.

His mind wandered to a night many years ago when Catherine had freaked out because Lindsey didn't want a birthday party. She had been worried that she was making Lindsey weird; that the little girl never saw her mother have any fun or spend time with her friends, and she was copying that. Gil had assured her that Lindsey mimicking Catherine would not be a bad thing. From the look she had given him, he got the feeling she thought he was just flattering her, but he had meant it sincerely.

It was good to see that Catherine and Lindsey had managed to come through the problems they had after Eddie's death. They seemed to be as close now as they were before that night, and it pleased him to see that. He knew it had broken Catherine's heart a little bit more every time she and Lindsey had fought, and, as her friend, it was horrible to watch her go through that and not be able to fix everything for her.

Thinking about Catherine's heart breaking reminded him of Andrew's words from the previous evening, and stirred once more his feelings of confusion and guilt. Although he didn't know what it was he had done to cause Andrew to make that comment, it still troubled him to think that he had caused Catherine pain.

With his thoughts on this new path, the silence no longer felt comfortable, so he tried another topic with Lindsey.

"Your Mom tells me you're at college in New York."

Her head snapped round to face him as if he had startled her, and he wondered again what it was that played so heavily on her mind.

"Yeah, I am," she replied.

"Do you like it?"

She nodded, but didn't look so sure.

"Oh, I'm convinced," he said with a smile.

Lindsey laughed a little, but there was no humour to it. "It's a long way from home."

Grissom nodded understandingly. "You miss your Mom?"

"Yeah… But she wouldn't hear of me going anywhere closer. I had always wanted to see New York, and throughout high school I'd talked about going to college there, but, having lost dad, and nearly losing her, staying with her was more important to me than whatever childhood dreams I may have had…"

Grissom felt his heart stop as he heard Lindsey say, "nearly losing her". She could have just been referring to the fact that they had grown apart, but the way she had said it, and that it came after mention of Eddie, made him think it was more serious than that.

"… But she wouldn't let what happened keep me from going," Lindsey was continuing, having failed to register the shock and confusion on Grissom's face. "And, in a way, I am glad I went. It is quite an experience and I would have missed that, and I never would have met Andrew," she smiled as she mentioned her boyfriend's name, and Grissom knew then that whatever was going on would be worked through. "But I miss her, and I worry about her. But she's trying to carry on as if it never happened; I guess I need to do the same… Although I don't think she's dealing with it as well as she'd like people to believe. She still worries herself, I think… And now I'm gonna give her some more to worry about." Her tone changed to one of anger. "She is gonna be so angry," she sighed, rubbing her hand across her face.

Grissom had so many questions about what had happened to Catherine, but Lindsey had changed the subject, opening up about what was on her mind, and it would be inconsiderate for him to change it back.

"I'm sure she won't be angry… She never could be angry at you," he said, trying to push the feelings of panic, dread and fear from his mind and heart.

Lindsey looked up at him. "She's certainly good at making it appear that she is, then."

Grissom smiled. "All mothers are fabulous actors… Whatever's wrong, Lindsey, she won't be angry."

Lindsey just stared at him for a while with a look he recognised from years of watching Catherine study evidence.

"What?" he asked her.

"It's been seven years but you still have that same look in your eyes."

His frown deepened. "What look?"

"The look you get when you talk about Mom… I used to see it whenever you looked at her, or whenever you mentioned her… And it's still there after all this time." Though it was her observation, Lindsey sounded as confused by this as Gil was.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said, though he did have a feeling he knew what she meant.

"That's because you don't see yourself when you're talking about her…" Lindsey responded, still studying him.

The intensity of her gaze was making him nervous, and he failed to think of an immediate response to that. And Lindsey spoke again before he could.

"Why are you here?"

He glanced at her to see that it was a deadly serious question. "Your Mom asked for my help with a case."

"And you just dropped everything and flew out here?"

He was starting to fear where this might be going. The similarities between Lindsey and Catherine were proving too useful to him in understanding exactly what each look she gave him meant. "I took a day or so to ensure everything would run smoothly at the lab in my absence, then I flew out here."

"And what are you doing here?" she asked, emphasis on 'here'.

Gil frowned even more. "Didn't we just – "

"To help with a case, you didn't have to take her out for dinner, you didn't have to let Andrew stay with you, and you didn't have to drive me back home this morning."

"It's what friends do – "

"Did you not stop being a friend six years ago when you stopped calling?"

"Lindsey this is not something – "

"She spent a long time trying to get over you..."

This silenced him.

"When she told me she was going out to dinner last night with you, and not Ecklie, it worried me…" She laughed a little. "It used to worry me that she spent so much time with him, but, out of the two of you, last night, he would have been my first choice."

"Lindsey, everything that's happened with your Mom and me is not as simple as you're making out… If I hurt her, I am sorry for that, but it was never my intention and I wasn't aware that I'd done it."

"I know."

He frowned again. "Sorry?"

"I see that now… Last night, Ecklie would have been my first choice… This morning, I see that you still genuinely care… And, you might claim that all mothers are good actors, but she's not good enough to convince me that she managed to get over you."

That might have been intended as an explanation, but Gil was still confused as to whether Lindsey was angry at him or not.

"… Until you left, I was a Gil-Catherine shipper, Grissom," she smirked.

"A what?" he asked, brow creased further.

"Internet lingo," she grinned, clearly having known all along that he wouldn't know what she meant. "I always thought the two of you would get together."

"'Always thought'? Lindsey you were twelve when I left."

She smiled again. "Yeah… Twelve, not stupid!" She giggled at the look of complete and utter confusion and surprise on Gil's face. "I'm just saying… you've got a second chance, Grissom… Please don't hurt her again."

While her tone had softened, her eyes held a threatening glare. And, he knew it was irrational for him to fear a twenty-year-old, but it was another 'Catherine look', and those always terrified him.

"I won't."

Lindsey smiled and nodded, "Good," then she turned back to the window and her features straightened, as her mind clearly returned to whatever her problem was.

-----

A few minutes later, Grissom was still trying to process all of the new information he had acquired from his short conversation with Lindsey, and almost missed Catherine's driveway.

He saw it at the last minute and swerved his car round the corner with as little disturbance to their seating posture as possible.

Lindsey grinned at him. "Nice driving," she said, before opening the door and stepping from the vehicle.

Grissom quickly followed her, and stopped her just as she was about to put her front door key into the lock. "Lindsey, what happened to your Mom?" he asked, finally unable to refrain from asking his questions.

Lindsey frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You said you nearly lost her," he said quickly.

Realisation passed visibly across Lindsey's face. "Ah… You don't know that she got shot?"

Though it was pointless for him to feel fear for Catherine's safety now, Grissom nevertheless was overwhelmed by it and took a step backwards.

"I thought you would have – " She stopped when the door opened and Catherine stepped outside.

"Hey," she greeted them cheerfully. "Are you coming in or not? Andrew and I made breakfast."

Lindsey remained looking apologetically at Grissom for a second and then she turned to her mother. "Hi, Mom," she said, stepping forward and embracing her. "I'm sorry if I worried you."

"Well, luckily I managed to figure out where you would go," Catherine grinned, glancing towards Grissom. Seeing the serious look on his face, her smile faltered as Lindsey walked past her and into the house. "Gil?" she asked. "Are you okay?"

He turned to face her, forcing a smile. "I'm fine," he lied.

"Will you join us for breakfast?" she asked, probably because he looked about ready to run away.

"Er… Thank you for the offer, but I need to go into the lab and finalise a few things… And I need to check in back home."

Catherine nodded, a small frown creasing her forehead. "Are you sure?"

He nodded quickly. "But thank you… again."

Catherine smiled, but it was clear from her expression that she thought there was something he wasn't telling her. "And thank you… For driving Lindsey over… And for taking Andrew with you last night," she said.

"Not a problem," he said. "I hope they work everything out."

"Well, there's no shouting coming from my kitchen yet, so that's gotta be a good sign, right?" Catherine said, with a smirk.

Grissom smiled, genuinely this time. "Let's hope so."

When Catherine's only response was a nod of her head, Grissom made sure to speak again before the inevitable descent of silence could occur. "Will I see you at the lab later?" he asked.

"Er… I'm not sure," she replied. "It depends how things go here… Conrad said it's fine for me to have the day off if necessary."

Grissom nodded. "That's good… Well, I'll probably see you tomorrow then."

Catherine nodded also. "Yeah… Thanks again."

Grissom shrugged, smiled and turned to walk back to his car.

As soon as he was in the vehicle he let out a breath he felt he had been holding in throughout their conversation.

It was illogical, he knew, for him to feel fear when thinking about the fact that Catherine had been shot – that was over now; she was alive. But it didn't stop him from feeling it; from feeling guilt, that he should have been here; and from feeling that he had no right to be here now, expecting them to be able to fall back into a friendship he had put an end to.

TBC…