Hello there! Yes, I know that I took a long time, yes, I know that I am a lazy ass. Yes, I know all of that.

Now, will you please leave that alone, and read the chapter? Maybe then, you'll forgive me. Thank you.

Disclaimer: Life is unfair. You know it. I know it. The owner of Naruto sure doesn't.

Oh, and sorry for the extra no ready time, but when it's in italics then, it's Sasuke's thoughts.

Files

Files. Mhm. More files. Other files. And again more files. Files, files, files. Why did they have so many files anyway? Meh, bar that. He knew why they needed files. Some poor people lacked the memory to preserve all of the information necessary in their gooey grey thing that we call a brain for no viable reason. Still, why so many of them? He flicked through the file that he was holding. Yes, he'd finally found it. Such trouble though. He didn't even need the stupid thing: he didn't class himself as one of those poor people who lack memory... No, not at all. Definitely not.

No. The reason that he'd had to wade through that sea of files more widely known as the filing room, was because his great, superb, kind, amazing, godlike, absolutely marvelous older brother needed (or wanted... whatever) this particular file. Yes. That's right. Uchiha Itachi needed a file, and he'd sent Sasuke to get it. Nothing less, nothing more. And to think that the bastard probably didn't even need it...

So. Wading back. Wading. Shit. Stuck. Remember to look where you're going next time. Seriously, getting you vest stuck on a filing cabinet is just stupid. Waaaading. Jeez, why is this room so big? It takes up a whole floor in the basement! And couldn't they put better lighting? And some signposts? Directions of some kind? No? Too expensive? Oh... I remember now. You're meant to be able to find you way on your own... Shit... I'm in for it now... Oooo! An exit. Perfect. Just what I was looking for.

We'll settle this now: Sasuke needs to sleep more. A lot more. As it happens, when all of the lack of sleep catches up to him, which it does once in awhile, he becomes very... Strange. Odd. His earlier thoughts are all the example you'll ever need.

Anyway, Sasuke was now bringing the file that he had worked so hard to get to his brother. Damn it! The elevator only started on the ground floor. He now had to walk up three floors. On foot.

--(time lapse)--

Sasuke stepped out of the elevator, still flicking through the file. Akatsuki. Well, that told him at least one thing: Itachi was going to be meeting with Naruto sometime soon. He noticed that although there were 10 Akatsuki members, the file only contained four photos.

He didn't bother to knock as he went into the large office, heading for the desk in order to slam the stupid file on it.

"You know you have a secretary. She'd be more than happy to go fetch stuff for you," he told the man in the reclining chair behind the desk.

"I know I do, but you do a much better job!"

"You are wasting my time, and it's for a file you don't even bloody need!" Itachi was now smirking. Apparently, he found his younger sibling highly amusing.

"That's true."

"Of course it-" waiiit... What? Words are getting through the layers of unsatisfied sleep in the mind... He admitted he didn't need it... That's unusual. And the bastard was still smirking too. Sasuke, peeved, decided to play it cool.

"Whatever. Send me to the file room again, and I'm burning all of it down." He started to leave. While he was making his exit, he thought: shit. It'd be either him or me, but one of us would have to write them all up again. Because no-one else knows them all off by heart. And something told him that he would be the happy winner of that lottery.

"Sasuke?" He tuned back, wondering for a second whether his big brother really could read his mind. "That's a hollow threat." Damn. I knew he could read my mind. "Besides, you mustn't talk of such things in front of guests..." Fuck the guests. Sasuke turned towards the door again.

Then, something in his mind clicked. He really did need to sleep. Guests. Oh God damn it, I just embarrassed myself in front of important guests. Oh... hell. Itachi's almost laughing at me. In front of guests. He's dead.

A sudden burst of angry energy emanated from the younger raven, and both of the other men in the room (for our guest is indeed of male gender) had a sudden feeling that the filing room wasn't the only thing in danger of being incinerated. Take the whole building, for instance.

Sasuke turned slowly away from the door, facing the window and the sofa in front of it where a blond man was sitting looking incredibly awkward. He seemed both embarrassed as hell and on the verge of bursting out laughing.

"Eh... Hi Sasuke." Stupid, annoying, nerve wracking blond. Sasuke smiled kindly, his voice going all nice and sweet as he answered.

"Hello Naruto." He then whirled around, stalked out of the room and slammed the door.

Naruto sat there, confused. That had been... extremely strange. Not only had the beginning of the 'meeting' with Itachi been odd (the man had placed him on the couch and given his some papers to read whilst he himself went to sit at his desk, looking at the door expectantly) but, he not been expecting Sasuke to suddenly appear,and then to have an... interesting conversation with his brother without even noticing that the blond was in the room. But the strangest had been his was of acting which was extremely different from every other time he had met the raven.

Frankly, it made him wonder for the other's health.

Itachi interrupted his thoughts "Well, since my brother was so kind as to bring the necessary documents to us, I think you can come and sit here" he patted the desk in front of him, indicating that Naruto should move form the very comfortable couch that he was currently sitting on to the equally comfy looking chair that the other was inviting him to go warm. Thinking this couldn't be to bad, he did what he was told.

"So, from what Sasuke told me, you have never done a murder case, and you aren't used to posh clients and the sort." Naruto almost blushed, remembering the reason for the raven to have come up with such a conclusion (namely, it had something to do with an embarrassing restaurant episode, when he had chickened out at the sight of the... poshness).

"No, I haven't."

"Well, that shouldn't be a problem. I'll have someone with you most of the time anyway, so you won't have to worry."

"That's good. Thanks. Eh... Who would that person be?"

"I haven't quite decided yet. So..." He flicked through the file, noting what Sasuke had seen about the pictures, then handed it to the blond, who had yet to find out who his clients were to be. Naruto leafed through it, obviously very interested. This was a good opportunity for him to prove himself, so he promised that he would give it all that he had. "These are your clients." Yes, Uchiha's do state the obvious sometimes. "I'll let you look through that while I find someone that can show you around, and help you some."

Now this wasn't completely a lie. All right, he did know who he was going to assign the task to, but he didn't know where the man was... That makes it a white lie, which isn't really a lie at all, so Itachi was being as truthful as he can possibly be. He scrolled down the list of employees that he had on his computer, and acted as if he was thinking carefully about what he was meant to be concentrating on. After a while, he decided that he didn't really want the blond in his office any longer, so he cleared his throat forcefully, easily catching the other's attention.

"I'll leave that with you so that you can look at it shall I?" The blond nodded, while Itachi took out some papers and a pen, pushing them across the desk. "These are the contracts that Dr. Tsunade and I agreed on. You are to do this case, and then, we'll reassess the situation, and act accordingly." The blond nodded again, then picked up the pen, glanced briefly over the papers and then signed wherever it was necessary, only pausing to ask the date. According to Itachi, this was going amazingly well. It was meant to go like this, of course, since he had planned everything out this way, but he was expecting a little more protest from the blond.

"I'm done. So when do I have to meet these guys?"

"Friday, I think." another while lie. Just because he knew didn't mean he wasn't thinking about it did it? "Anyway, If you wait outside my office for a few minutes, someone will come and show you what you need to know."

With that, they parted, with the usual courtesies that come hand in hand with such a meeting.

When Naruto was standing safely outside the door, Itachi took out his cellphone and after dialling a number, brought it to his ear. When the person on the other end grumpily greeted him, he replied joyously:

"Sasuke, I need you!"

Sasuke was almost literally fuming. He'd just gotten to his office when his cell phone rang. As you have probably guessed, it was his one and only older brother. And his new assignment was to escort a certain blond around the building, showing him everything. It seemed that Itachi didn't realize that he had work to do, other than acting as a personal servant.

-Ping- went the elevator. The now fuming-more-than-I-would-have-thought-it-was-possible Sasuke stepped out and headed down the corridor, towards the figure slumped on the floor. A slight noise was coming from the blond. It sounded suspiciously like... snoring. Mhhh...

Sasuke went on fuming. Meh, why do I have to do this anyway? Seriously, there were hundreds of other people that could have done it! Anybody in this bloody office building could have done it! But noooo! It just had to be me didn't it? No-one else would have wanted the job anyway, he added to himself bitterly. Then again... Some of the girls probably wouldn't have complained. Until they heard how much he can talk that is.

Ah, it's the sleep. It's reaaaaly getting to him. Yes, I am sorry to tell you that it did take him this long to make the connections and process the information that his brain was just barely getting. So this is what went through his mind once he was finished complaining to himself:

He is slumped over on the floor. And there are distinctive sleep-related noises coming from his general direction. There is no one else in this corridor, and I know for a fact that I am NOT snoring.

Oh God! The idiot fell asleep.

Well, this is a dilemma. Mhhh... Sasuke should be ashamed of his next thoughts. He thought it gave him a very nice opportunity to run away. Tsk. Fortunately, he realized that, if he left the blond sleeping outside Itachi's office, Itachi would surely notice, and make Sasuke's life hell from then on.

He stopped in front of the sleeping figure, contemplating how to wake him up. Somehow, a bucket of water seemed inappropriate. Not only would he have to fetch the said bucket, and fill it with water, without spilling a drop, but then the blond would wake up very loudly, making Itachi come out. And on top of that, Sasuke would have to go around with a very soaked, complaining blond. The bucket of water was obviously not an option.

So? How to proceed? -blank-. Finally, after having found no better solution, he nudged the blond with his foot. The said blond grunted. He repeated the action. The blond grunted.

This, very suddenly, the grunt was followed by a cry of surprise, and then two people tumbling to the floor.

"Naruto. Get off me. Now." Sasuke was not too pleased with their current positions. Naruto is a very heavy person, when it comes to being under him.

"Eh? Sasuke? What are you doing here?" Naruto has an amazing gift at forgetting that that is not so very important to him. He does, though, like to have his questions answered. Unfortunately for him, since he hadn't made any effort to change the position he was in, he wasn't about to get an answer.

"Naruto. I said- Get. Off. Me." The annoyed voice finally got through to the blond.

"Oh. Eh..." He removed himself. "Sorry?" Sasuke got up, and contemplated hurting the blond for a minute. Nope, Itachi would hear.

"Whatever."Maybe he could just insult him instead. He decided against it. He turned away, and stared walking down the corridor, intent on getting his 'errand' done as quickly as humanly possible. Realizing that he wasn't exactly being followed, he threw over his back: "You know, I haven't got all day."

Something clicked in Naruto's mind, and he grinned as he rushed off after the raven, just having realized that he had been given an unforeseen opportunity to tease the raven. This was going to be fuuuuuuuuun.

"Wow!" Naruto looked around incredulously.

"I heard the first time you know."

"Wow! This is your OFFICE!"

"Yes, Naruto. This is my office."

"Seriously?"

"Naruto, make me say it once more, and you will find yourself falling very far. And that window there is going to be the exit point."

"Alright. My bad." He sat himself down comfortably on the swivelling chair that was Sasuke's to take, by every right. His goal of annoying Sasuke as much as possible seemed to be coming to fruition. "So, anything else I need to see?"

"Probably. Yes. There is. There's... the filing room," you mean the sea of files that you have to wade through once in a while and which there is no way I am entering again so soon " You should probably meet the guards, and and visit their quarters," those cheerful idiots. You'll probably get on with them wonderfully... "And you should probably meet the rest of the staff." Yeah, otherwise, he'll never get around. He'll get lost in 5 minutes tops. "But, you can do all of that on you own." Because there is no way that I am going through that torture.

Naruto could feel that there was more to that sentence than what he had actually heard, and that what he had gotten was far from being the complete version. He didn't comment on it though, preferring to pout and ask: "But why can't you show me around?" in the most pitiful voice that he could muster. It could melt the coldest of bastards.

"Because, I'm busy." Apparently, he was wrong.

"Oh yeah? Doing what?"

"I have clients that I have to go see."

"Ooooo! Who?"

"None of your business."

"Pfff. Asshole. Where're you meeting 'em?"

"In the Konoha buildings." (that's where Naruto works. Used to work. Whatever.)

"Really?

"Yes." Naruto stared at the raven. A very slight frown appeared on his face.

"... You're not being very talkative... Can't you at least give me an indication to where I can find all those wonderful things that you mentioned?"

"The file room's in the third basement, the guards' quarters are on the first and second floors, and the staff it... around."

"Descriptive. So, you gonna introduce me to everyone?" The blond beamed. He could feel Sasuke getting annoyed, and was doing everything possible to help him get there. It was fun to see the Uchiha irritated, he knew that already. If only he could have just a liiitle but of help...

"I'm leaving now. Show yourself around." Sasuke turned, mind set on leaving. He didn't like that he couldn't keep his utter calm. His patience was wearing very low. It seemed that fate had more in store for him though.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

-Dring! Dring- Both men turned towards the ringing utensil on the large desk that Naruto had been comfortably sprawled upon not a minute ago, before the... interesting ring tone had made him jump a meter into the air. -Dring! Dring!-

"Nice ring..."

"Shut up dobe." Naruto smirked as he heard the name, knowing that he would soon make the other regret it. Before Sasuke had gotten anywhere near the desk, he reached out, picked it up, and brought it to his ear, still grinning. Payback sucked.

"Helooooooo?"

"Hello! How are you doing?" a voice on the other end answered him, and it surprised him that whoever it was sounded like he had been expecting it all along. He decided to go along with it.

"Quite well thanks! Except one bastard is abandoning me to take care of 'other business'. Or so he said. And how are you doing?" Sasuke was now quite enraged. He was trying to snatch the phone from Naruto, who was being rather adept at dodging.

"I am doing well too, thanks. And who do I have the honor of conversing with?" This was rather nice, all in all. The person on the other end was taking to their game quite well, and Sasuke seemed to be getting out of control. Mhhh... Wonder why he's suddenly red in the face?

"Naruto Uzumaki, at your service!"

"Well, I certainly hope so!" Naruto didn't have much time to think of that last statement as it was getting harder to evade Sasuke whilst keeping the phone. Luckily, he had a few tricks up his sleeve. Jumping onto the desk for instance. "And how is the bastard you mentioned doing?"

"Icy as ever. He was acting weird this morning though... Kind of crazed, it you know what I mean. I overheard an interesting talk he had with his bro. They're a bit strange together to tell you the truth."

"I know. I've witnessed it too."

"So, who am I talking to anyway?"

"NARUTO, GIVE ME THE FUCKING PHONE!" That was Sasuke, by the way.

"Oooo. He sounds impatient!" and that was the previously unnamed person on the other end.

"Mhhh... He does. I don't think he appreciates me being on his desk, actually."

"I wonder why?... So, how about you let me speak to the bastard? I might be able to appease him. Who knows?"

"Eh, a'right!" He handed the phone gracefully to Sasuke, who grabbed it and promptly started yelling into it. After he had calmed down, Naruto thought it was safe to get off the desk and get back into that comfortable swivelling chair. He did so, and watched the raven carefully, while listening to the one end of the conversation that he could hear.

"Why the fuck aren't you using my cell phone?"--

"Couse not. How'd you know I was here anyway."--

"Itachi chose him for the Akatsuki case." -- Sasuke was now running a hand through his hair. He seemed to have calmed down a lot. Naruto wondered what the other one was saying to appease Sasuke so easily. And he had taken so long to get the other riled up too!

"Course he will. Then again, it's up to him and Itachi. I guess it depends how the case goes."-- Naruto noticed that this was the second time that the raven had shortened his normal formal and perfect language to make it more familiar. Suddenly, he resented people saying 'course' in stead of the proper word.

"Yeah... Not exactly unusual."-- The raven was leaning against the desk, using it for support.

"Fuck you!" Naruto noted he was now completely rigid again, his back straight, his eyes in his permanent glare.

"Go shove it somewhere else. And don't call my office. Important phone calls exist."--

"Not in the slightest."--

"I'm hanging up now."-- Sasuke rolled his eyes

"I wasn't kidding last time about kicking you out, just so you know." And with that, the raven hung up.

Naruto stared at the raven questioningly. The conversation had been strange enough with only one side of it. He wanted to know what had been said on the other side, but for some reason, he doubted that Sasuke was about to tell.

"Who was that?" Sasuke carefully placed the phone back on the stand."

"A colleague." Vague; Very vague. And vague equals an unsatisfied Uzumaki. Especially when it comes to listening to half a conversation that managed to make the raven relax completely and then get very annoyed in a matter of seconds.

"Uhu. Sure. Ds'he have a name?"

"Sai."

"So, who is he anyway?" Sasuke pulled a folder out of a drawer. He realized that he had been about to leave it before, and felt glad that he didn't have to look like an idiot and come back to get it. Naruto was staring at him, and for some reason, he felt uneasy. He didn't know quite what to do. Sasuke obviously wasn't about to answer, so Naruto changed the subject. He'd find out anyway. He still had to meet the whole staff, and someone was bound to know who this Sai person was.

"Why haven't you changed the ring tone?" Sasuke almost spluttered. That was the last thing that he had been expecting. He decided that he was going to ignore everything that related in any way to the blond, including why he was feeling so clumsy and flustered. He started to leave, but couldn't resist throwing one last sentence over his shoulder. Uchiha's can't resist having the last word.

"Couldn't be bothered. I'll see you later..." And with that, he disappeared.

That had been absolutely horrible. Sasuke couldn't believe it. They'd been acting like fucking two year old's! Two year old's! Two grown lawyers yelling and pushing each other over the phone. And one of them an Uchiha! Yes, Sasuke Uchiha a two year old. (This is a queue for all of the fangirls to start squealing and saying oh! how cute!). This was not meant to happen! And why in the world had Sai suddenly decided to call? Eh? What was that all about? And he had just had to be in a playful mood to? Jeez!

Sasuke had a sudden feeling that the world was against him.

But the worst was that the blond had managed to get him into such a state! It was damn right stupid that's what it was. Annoyed, he could deal with. Irritated was practically a permanent state for him. But angry? And fluttered? That didn't happen so often. No. That's wrong. Those two never happened.

And it seemed to him that the blond hadn't even noticed anything! That was good, but still! Did the blond have no observation skills at all?

...

...

Nope. Not a shred of it.

Sasuke stopped at one of the bathrooms, splashing his face with water, then steadying himself for a while on the sink. He didn't dare to look at himself in the mirror. He did look up eventually, but only when he was absolutely sure that all traces of eventual pink had disappeared from his face. And as predicted, his skin had returned to the same pale shade that it usually was.

Good. He certainly wasn't going to show himself in a flustered state to anyone.

As he walked away, that little voice in the back of his head that he pointedly ignores as a general rule because it's so troublesome really muttered to itself (as Sasuke obviously wasn't listening). It told it's self the following : But you do show yourself flustered in front on someone, don't you? The fact that he's clueless doesn't make that fact go away...

But no-one heard that, now did they?

And so, Sasuke went on his not-so-merry-as-it-could-have-been-if-he-had-given-it-a-proper-chance way to meet his two favorite clients (Sasuke and the little voice in the back of his head that he pointedly ignores as a general rule because it's so troublesome really do know sarcasm, just so you know...) Hatake kakashi, and Umino Iruka.

Hello! Again. Anyway. I hope that you liked that.

I now need to thank Sahdowcat, my unoficial beta. If it weren't for her, not only would this story not exist (because i wouldn't be aware that there was such a thing as beatiful beatiful fanfiction) but, this story would be crap. I force her to read absolutely every piece before I can writa anymore. And she has to agree and critic it before I let her out of hell.

So thank you Sahdowcat!

And thank you for reading! (I KNOW I'm copying, but I had to put it in somewhere!) Also, please do me a favor and review. I need it. Badly. Oh, and there shouldn't be anymore Typos. I actually re-read it for once.

Oh, and if you don't know the song lemon tree by fool's garden, then you should.

Review!

Pac. XD