A/N: This chapter was originally going to skip to when Emma shows up, but since I got a few comments about the dinner, I went back and wrote it. It worked out well, for me anyway, because I came up with a way to tie in some of the events from "Losing My Mind." Enjoy!

Chapter Seven

Izzie sat at the kitchen island, hiding her smile in a cup of coffee. It was taking all that Meredith had to mix the meatloaf. The big bowl kept tipping one way or the other as she used her small hands to combine the ingredients. "Are you making mashed potatoes," Meredith asked her.

Izzie sipped her coffee. "Yes, don't worry, I'm taking care of everything else." Meredith mumbled something and went about making the three pans of meatloaf she planned. "I made cheesecake for dessert," Izzie grinned. Meredith shook her head, placed the meatloaf pans on a cookie sheet, and placed the cookie sheet in the oven before washing her hands and flopping down in the chair beside Izzie. "Aww, poor baby, are you tired?"

"Yes," Meredith said, resting her head on Izzie's shoulder. Izzie giggled, setting her coffee down. "They'll be here soon. I picked up some liquor on my way home."

"Great idea, because we should all get drunk tonight," Izzie said sarcastically. The doorbell rang. "Alex, get that, would you?"

They heard grumbling as Alex came down the stairs, into the living room, and answered the door. "Bambi and mini-Grey are here," he called out. "Kitchen," he told them before going back up the stairs.

"What's wrong with Evil Spawn," George asked, coming into the kitchen, Lexie trailing behind him.

"Who knows," Izzie shrugged. They heard the front door open again. Derek and Mark soon came into the kitchen, arguing.

"I'm telling you, Mark, that I'm the favorite uncle," Derek was saying as he swooped in to kiss Meredith on the cheek. "They like me best."

"Not a chance," Mark said, "you weren't there for Thanksgiving or Christmas last year. You have a lot of ground to make up, Shep, and I'm the favorite uncle." Mark flopped down on the chair beside Izzie. "Grey, Stevens," he greeted, "O'Malley, Little Grey."

"Dr. Sloan," they chorused.

"See, even these guys like me more than you," Derek laughed.

"Dr. Shepard," Izzie, George, and Lexie said, causing Mark to laugh.

"Aww, man, that's priceless."

"Dinner won't be for a little while," Meredith said, trying to figure something out that would keep them occupied.

"We could watch your Mom's tapes," George suggested, quietly.

"Oh, yeah, good idea," Meredith said. "George, will you set them up while Izzie and I finish dinner? Has anyone seen Cristina?" Everyone answered negatively and George led the two Attendings and his roommate out to the living room.

"So," Izzie smiled, "this is nice."

Meredith grinned.

"How are the two of you handling everything?"

"Slowly," Meredith answered. "We have a lot to sort out, but we'll get there."

"Oohh, confident Meredith," Izzie teased, "I like it." Meredith rolled her eyes and turned on the light in the oven. "It's not going to be done anytime soon," Izzie told her.

"Just looking," Meredith said. "What else?"

"We're going to make rolls, potatoes, and some vegetables," Izzie said, "you know, for Dr. Shepard."

"Derek," a voice corrected from the living room.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "Derek," she mocked.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Great meal, Grey," Mark said as he slipped into his leather jacket, "Stevens."

"Thanks," Izzie yelled from the kitchen where she was placing half the leftovers in containers for George and Lexie.

"Alright, well," Mark said, pulling Meredith in for a short, awkward hug, "er, see you at work. Emma comes in tomorrow." With that he left.

Cristina had made a short appearance. She had been in surgery with Hahn, which had ran late, and then stayed long enough to eat dinner and dessert before taking off on her motorcycle. Alex went back upstairs as soon as he was done with dinner, leaving Mark, George, Lexie, Izzie, Derek, and Meredith to small talk afterwards.

"Why was he nervous," Meredith asked Derek as they made their way to the door.

"Probably nervous I'd punch him again," Derek joked.

"Do you want to go for a walk," Meredith asked, suddenly. Derek agreed, so they grabbed their jackets and headed out the door. They walked hand in hand, silently, just enjoying the evening for about fifteen minutes before Meredith cleared her throat. Derek looked at her expectantly. "I didn't try to kill myself," Meredith said, the words rushing out of her mouth.

Derek looked at her, holding her hand a little tighter to get her to stop walking. He was confused. They hadn't been talking about anything remotely close to that . . . they hadn't been talking at all.

"I had just been in a fight with my mother," she said, "and she said things. And I hit the water and it was cold and for a second . . . just a second . . . not even a second. . . I thought, what's the point? But, Derek, I would never, not really, I wouldn't do that to you . . . to anyone . . . I know how it feels . . . and I wouldn't."

"Okay," Derek said, slowly. They hadn't made it more than a few blocks from her house. He was partially relieved that she was finally, really talking about it, but he was confused as to what brought it on.

"Dr. Wyatt called me a coward and a quitter the other day," Meredith said. "I'm not a quitter. I'm not . . . I'm not my mother."

"Your mother?"

"I'm sure that you don't know this," Meredith said, deciding to explain – needing to explain, "but while my mother and the Chief were Residents here in Seattle . . . they had an affair."

Derek nodded. "The Chief mentioned it."

Meredith nodded, in turn, deciding to get an explanation later. "He went back to his wife. He went back to Adele, my mother left my father, and we went to Boston. She was okay for a few weeks, but she tried . . . she tried to drown herself in the bathtub."

Derek's breath hitched. He was transported back to the bathroom connected to Meredith's room the morning he walked in to find her underwater.

"My Aunt was staying with us at the time . . . or we were staying with her . . . some of the details are blurry. But I remembered what it felt like. And I wouldn't . . . I didn't . . . I was in shock, Derek . . . the water was so cold . . . and I was tired, so tired . . ."

Derek didn't know what to say. At a loss at what to do, Derek gathered her into his arms and held her against him. She had started crying. "We should go back," he told her gently, "we can talk some more inside."

She stepped back from him, her eyes red from crying. "Derek, seriously, I would never do that to you or anyone else."

"Okay," Derek said. He had almost said "I understand" but that would have been wrong because he didn't understand. Not really. He was mad at her mother, though, for putting Meredith through that. But, in a way, it explained so much about Ellis. Richard had left Ellis for his wife so why in the world would she have believed in soul mates and love and pass it on to her daughter when it obviously didn't work out for her? It explained so, so much.