fobchapter3
Chapter three - 'The elf's got a point, Sirius probably would!'
"Harry, I'm glad to see you're up and about finally. We were so worried about you weren't we Arthur." Mrs Weasley smiled at Harry as he came down for the first time in three days to breakfast. She had finally given up having a go at Sirius when she found out he hadn't left Harry's side in over two days. It wasn't that she agreed with him or anything it was just it was quiet clear Sirius wasn't going to take a blind bit of notice of her and so she would have to work her positive influence on Harry by different means.
"Yeah bit sore still." Harry tried to smile back weakly but he had barely eaten anything and had lost quiet a lot of weight recently. He was still very pale and found himself getting dizzy the more he stood up.
"Have you had anything to eat dear?" She asked warmly hoping to fill him up on anything and everything and almost posed for action with her wand to rustle up anything he could possibly desire.
"Yeah, Sirius made me hot porridge." Harry explained sitting down in the nearest chair as Arthur leaned over to talk to him.
"Hello Harry, I'm sure it's the first time I've seen you in ages and it seems you've been keeping Sirius quiet busy, worrying about you!" He beamed at Harry but couldn't cover the disappointment in his eyes at how ill he was still looking. He had hoped to rectify this but despite his attempt to get up this morning he wasn't sure how.
"I didn't mean to." Harry mumbled quietly picking up the jug and pouring himself some pumpkin juice slowly. He'd given up on wearing Dudley's old jumper on Sirius's request but still kept to wearing a better fitting long sleeved t-shirt also at Sirius's request, to keep him warm. Sirius soon worked out though that Harry didn't care what he wore as long as it covered his neck and most his hands easily.
"Did Sirius ever get it out of Kresher how he got around his rules?" Mr Weasley continued in a false casual manner trying to ignore the warning look from his wife for broaching such a subject so easily.
"I don't know, he didn't say. He's banned Kresher from being in the same room as me for now though." Harry added trying to think of something to say. He liked talking to Mr Weasley, he had the same calming manner that Ron did that rarely made him raise his voice or appear angry.
"Oh well, never mind. I'm sure Dumbledore will get it out of him, he was annoyed you'd fallen ill when he came to visit last time, he really wants to talk to you about something important." Harry looked away ashamed he had disappointed his headmaster, he didn't like being a disappointment but some how he could never help it, people were just disappointed by him for some reason.
"Don't look so worried Harry, he wasn't angry particularly when Lupin explained and I'm sure he'll be glad to see you back on your feet tomorrow night."
Tomorrow night! Harry bellowed all of a sudden in his head, he had no idea he'd have to speak with Dumbledore that soon, have his mind poked in by the headmaster until Harry admitted all his terrible truths.
Mr Weasley went off will Bill not long later having had the morning off to try and catch up on some well needed rest, leaving Harry sat in the dinning room with Ron to play chess. Sirius hadn't strayed far from Harry, and never allowed a door to be shut between him and his godson if he could really help it. So he had recently decided to search around the living room for things Kresher had left for Harry to stumble across and keep an easy close eye on Harry as he rested with his friends, occasionally joining in the conversation if he thought he could get away with it. This wasn't very often but Sirius didn't mind, he didn't really have anything to say and they were mainly talking about things from Hogwarts which had long since changed since the time of the maraulders.
Hermione however was appalled at the way Sirius had treated his house elf even if she daren't say anything and when she was asked why by Ginny, after he had clearly been the one to make Harry sick she started to explain what it was she'd been thinking about.
"Tell me what you've been on about! I know your mind, it's too bloody cleaver for its own good. Why can't you just accept Kresher tried to poison Harry and help him get better?" Ginny asked quietly pretending to be discussing the contents of Fred and George's latest sales brochures. They'd dropped it off for Harry saying he could have anything he wanted for no charge.
"Well Sirius isn't likely to of left anything out in his rules to Kresher when it comes to murdering Harry now is he? The man's gone funny in the head when it comes to Harry."
"Oh come on, he's relatively normal considering what he was like last year." Ginny argued having become very fond of Sirius and his boyish ways recently.
"No it's not a bad thing. Its just, he is really spoiling Harry rotten with attention isn't he? Not, that it hasn't done wonders for Harry to have someone care about him like that, just, I'm quiet sure Sirius was very clear as anything in his rules to Kresher. You know he was banned from being closer that 10feet to Harry in case Harry found him remotely annoying?"
"You don't think it was Kresher do you?" Ginny asked puzzled but catching on quiet easily as they paused for Sirius to wonder back out of ear shot in his quest for yet more of his brothers old possessions. So far he was actually quiet surprised by what he'd found on this floor alone when it came to rather dangerous inappropriate objects.
"No I don't think he could, even though he really wanted to. Kresher really wants to go to another member of Sirius's family and unfortunately, he thinks Sirius would top himself if anything happened to Harry, if he died or something." Hermione continued in an even quieter whisper.
"Well not that it wouldn't be devastating to Harry to admit it but the elf's got a point, Sirius probably would." Ginny whispered back keeping a close eye out for eaves droppers.
"I agree, poor old Lupin, he cares so much about Sirius. He loves having his friend back doesn't he? Anyway, my point is if Kresher didn't do it then who did? You've seen how dodgy Harry is haven't you, even before he broke his ankle and got poisoned, twice!"
"Yes I'm worried about him; he kept jumping out his skin when ever anybody went near him other than you." She replied thoughtfully trying to remember anything he could from that first night he arrived.
"And you, he'd happily lean over me to whisper to something in your ear wouldn't he. What was that about anyway?" Hermione asked seeing a naughty look appear on Ginny's face.
"Oh well Ron thought I was still going out with Dean, when really I was sort of with Nev, he sort of got my attention when he dragged that death eater to the ground to rescue me. Harry was making crude comments about love at first sight over a trampled death eater." They both laughed at this until Lupin came hobbling in after the first night of a full moon. He knew he felt ok being around people now and had deliberately kept his distance till late on in the morning so not as to cause any difficult situations, plus he was so unbelievably tired and couldn't believe it when Moody said he'd slept most the night.
"You feel crap this morning?" Hermione asked politely passing Lupin the morning's paper.
"Just a bit girls. How long has Harry been up and about?" He asked pulling a cushion up to rest his back more.
"Not that long really, Sirius is on a mad hunt for any more family heirlooms and Kresher's banned from half the rooms!" Ginny explained quickly to fill him and started turning over the broacher to look at Fred and George's 'ooo-no-poo' advert on the back.
"You know I'm surprised they've gotten away with that. What with the ministry being such tight gits and all?" Lupin replied having picked up Sirius's slightly less teacher-ish language since he'd finally moved in long turn.
"Yeah well they keep putting huge orders in for their shield hats and what-not don't they?" Hermione laughed flicking through the booklet at some of the love potions and pigmy Puffs, Fred and George were dealing in to try and tap in to the huge daft female market.
"I'm surprised Molly's letting them get away with it so easy too?" Lupin added before suddenly becoming very interested in a rather disturbing article.
"Mum isn't speaking to them at the moment since they brought her pearl earrings for her birthday. She can't forgive them for it. She can't forgive Sirius for been more than half decent at looking after Harry either." Ginny explained twiddling with her hair.
"No, but Sirius does seem to enjoy winding her up though doesn't he." Lupin explained holding the paper at arms length to get a better view.
"Sirius what?" Asked Sirius hearing his name and wandering sitting down in the arm chair next to Lupin.
"You enjoy winding our mother up." Ginny replied to a cheeky grin from Sirius before he picked up what was left of Lupin's paper.
"I really don't know what you're talking about Ginny." Sirius replied disappearing behind his half of the paper. Annoyed they couldn't continue the previous conversation in private the two girls instead decided to join the boys and watch to see how Harry was behaving today.
"What's got your attention Moony?" Sirius asked flopping his half of the paper back on the coffee table and began fidgeting around in search of something else to do.
"You never could sit still for very long could you?" Lupin asked dryly from behind his still intriguing article.
"Yeah well, I get board. What are you reading?" He asked leaning over and pulling the side of the paper down to peer over his friends shoulder. Lupin at first had been rather annoyed by Sirius doing this, but after the hundredth time since they first started spending time together he finally got used to it again.
"Erm, it's about how muggles are starting to notice things and well look, certain types of crimes have increased as well." Lupin started to explain laying down the paper on his lap but Sirius was suddenly watching Harry wander into the room with Ginny and his cloak.
They sat down on the sofa and Harry pulled his cloak around him tight tucking one leg up under his knee and leaving the particularly injured one to dangle down more comfortably.
"Fred and George said you could have free-bees but they won't let me have half the stock." Ginny started to explain picking up the broacher as Harry laid his head down lazily on her shoulder.
"And you want me to order stuff for you so they don't realise?" Harry asked finally looking across to Sirius for a split second who still as a statue following the conversation.
"Fred and George are giving you free-bees?' He asked thinking it better than why are you so cosy with Ginny now I thought it was Hermione earlier and yet you won't come any bloody where near me to even say hello!
'But they were arguing with Ron earlier weren't they, said that they wouldn't give family discount unless it was worth there while." Sirius continued having only attention for Harry and forgetting Lupin's paper which he happily took back up to read without the fidgeter next to him.
"Yeah well Harry's different. They said you were there patron or something." Ginny asked also a little curious.
"I paid for them to get started in the business and stuff, so in return I get as much of what ever I like." Harry explained rubbing his eyes heavily and still leaning on Ginny.
"You did, any particular reason?" Sirius asked knowing full well it must of being a substantial amount to let Harry have free reign in their shop.
"It was the Triwizarding gold. The Diggory's didn't want it and I don't need it. Figured they'd put it to good use.' Harry explained to an ever so slightly stunned Sirius.
'Well I didn't want it. I'm not exactly poor am I and well, if I did some how run out of money I can always scrounge off you. I mean you must have saved a hell of a lot of money on soap over the years." Harry replied finally being a bit more himself around Sirius for the first time he'd arrived this summer, he knew he should try harder and when he woke up that morning ha resolved to do his best and be friendly but so far he'd only managed a few attempts.
Sirius's broke into a smile and Lupin sniggered loudly behind his paper although Harry was able to keep an incredibly sill, serious face. That though was slightly more to do with the fact that he didn't feel like smiling than any sort of comical dead-pan face.
"What do ya' mean, I save money on soap? I wash. Now and then." Sirius replied in mock outrage knowing full well he didn't always bother to shave in the mornings and was a bit lax in combing his hair and putting clean clothes on at times until Lupin reminded j him just how many days he'd been wearing the ones he had on.
"Nothing, just I can obviously scrounge of you if need be." Harry replied finally smiling a bit himself at seeing Sirius happy. It soon passed though and before long Harry was back to his original nearly silent self making Sirius feel like he'd failed in some way again.
"You're not useless, he was just tired that's all. And probably didn't want to have Mrs Weasley fussing over him through his dinner as well." Lupin was trying to comfort his friend by convincing him that Harry wasn't trying to avoid him that afternoon when he suddenly ran off upstairs claiming he wanted to go to bed.
"He said he was hungry ten minuets ago when Ginny was here and now she's not, he makes some fake comment about not being hungry and run's away. And before you say it I know I'm not paranoid the boy just doesn't want to be around me anymore. He must think I'm a waste of time or something." Sirius sat back down in the empty dark living room with his face in his once manicured hands that even now still look like they've being scrubbing around in dirt for some twenty years.
"Sirius?" Lupin sat by his friend and put a slightly wary hand on his shoulder.
"It'll be getting dark outside soon, you should go get ready for bed." Sirius grumbled bitterly allowing Lupin to give up and go to his room before the moon came up.
Lupin whished he could sit and try and get Sirius to see sense but he had barely got his room prepared for the nights full moon when he started to feel the angry monster inside him come out. He knew he should have calmed himself down before he sat down on his bed, the moment he felt his stomach lurch with the anger of his friend's cruelties. This was going to be a difficult night and he hoped Sirius would be up soon to keep a close eye on him.
It was the agreement of their living arrangements. Lupin would only stop if Sirius made dam well sure that Lupin in his werewolf state, didn't put anybody else at danger, whether he'd taken his potion or not, sometimes Lupin's emotions as a man came to play a part in his emotions as a wolf. He closed and locked his door then sat on his bed to pull most his clothes off, it was cold tonight for some reason, but Lupin knew it was always a waste of time leaving clothes on as he changed, he would only tear them to pieces in the process and unfortunately it usually beyond repair.
Sitting in silence and rubbing his face as he tried to fight the monster bursting to come out, Lupin didn't notice a dirty little house elf click his finger and unlock the door.
"Harry's laid in his bed Sirius, feeling a bit crap. I told him you'd come up later and leave some food on the side in case he gets hungry when he wakes up." Ron explained coming down to dinner and finding Sirius about to ask where Harry was.
"Oh well ok. He did look tired when he went up before." Sirius mumbled looking slightly disappointed but seemed to be accepting defeat that Harry was indeed still rather ill and couldn't help it.
"He said he felt sick after mother tried to force him to eat eggs and bacon for dinner." Ginny added quietly as she went passed making Sirius feel guiltily a whole lot better that it possibly wasn't all his fault Harry's absence.
"No Harry tonight?" Mrs Weasley pretended to ask politely but in reality was taking some personal triumph that despite Sirius's care, Harry still wasn't feeling well enough to come down for dinner.
"It's nearly dusk. You'd better go and check on Lupin." Tonks reminded, as Sirius was about to sit next her and pester her about either Harry or Lupin, however, remembering his promise quickly got up and left the room. He knew Lupin would have magically sealed the door and locked his wand away for the night because he was always so diligent about this, but as promised Sirius would always check on him if he wasn't going to be spending the night as a dog scratching himself. He liked having a good old scratch sometimes but then really, he was supposed to be playing the host at the moment and couldn't trust Mrs Weasley with a free rain of his house. She might disrupt the dust too much.
Harry felt sick and sweaty as he lay twisting on his bed with heavy blankets around him. He'd been chilly when he climbed into bed and shivering like a leaf when Ron rapped him up in extra sheets but now his skin was on fire and the thought of eggs and bacon made him sick to the stomach as he finally rolled out of bed in search of a cool toilet to through up in. Rolling out of bed he staggered to the door and pulled it open feeling a cold force of air blow against his face turning him suddenly icy cold.
Grabbing a blanket tight around his head and shoulders he headed out in to the corridor and stumbled up a few steps at the end of the hallway to find what he hoped was the bathroom. He was sick and dizzy now and starting to bleed again from his left arm and limping with his right leg where the Benzar powder hadn't quiet fully healed the muscles. He felt like a wreck, worse than he had in a while but still not quiet as bad as when he first staggered back in to the Dursley's house after a night of wondering around the streets on his own.
"Harry are you asleep?" Sirius asked poking his head around the bedroom door hoping to find Harry fast asleep like a little angel and perfectly fine or even better, wide awake and wanting his company.
He wasn't there though and no-matter how many times Sirius pulled his blankets around he wasn't anywhere to be found making fear stricken panic come to Sirius as he pushed himself out the door. He ran along the corridor looking for Harry and calling his name when he heard loud growling and shouting coming from up the steps to the next half floor.
"Harry get away from me! Go, you shouldn't be in here!" Lupin's panicky voice called out as he suddenly became aware of Harry laid on the floor beside him smelling of fresh blood and unconscious having toppled backwards into the room and through the door apparently by accident.
"Lupin what's the matter?" Sirius called hearing a loud howl from Lupin as he finally became more wolf than human.
'Blood fresh blood I haven't smelt human blood in such a long time, its warm and young, perfect to kill perfect to eat!'
'No it's Harry, he's hurt, I have to shout for Sirius! Get him out of here, get him away from me, I can't keep my hunger at bay for long.'
'Hmm, fresh young meat I haven't smelt or tasted this in a long time, only mangy old dog. That black dog that looks at me and leaves meat for me to chew on before I sleep.'
'No it's Harry, I can't go near him! I won't! I'll satisfy my hunger with the steak, yes the steak, I'll distract myself while Sirius comes to get him away. I won't hurt Harry, I wont!'
'But fresh young meet? It's so warm, so tasty! I'll just have a taste, yes a taste, to see how old he is! After all, he's only lying here in my den. This is my den, why shouldn't I get to have whatever happens to stumble on to me!'
'No I won't, but it smells so good, the steak is so cold and dead compared to warm flesh like this!'
'Hmm a taste yes, I can smell how young and strong he is, let me lick his blood, let me taste man flesh again, its being so long!'
The large twitching wolf leaned over Harry's body breathing and dribbling, unaware of the numerous humans he could get to if he only pushed himself through the open door. But he was also fighting against all his might to stop the monster on the outside from killing his friends son.
"Harry!" Sirius bellowed seeing Lupin the werewolf leaning over Harry's limp body and licking the blood from his arm with a menacing look of food in his eyes. Seeing that Lupin wasn't able to control himself, Sirius flicked his wand and shot bonds at his old friend binding him back from Harry who suddenly became aware as he opened his eyes at the situation around him.
"Arrrgh!" He screamed.
Frightened by the huge bloody teeth barely inch's away from his face as Sirius struggled to control the monster that Lupin had all but lost control of.
"Harry get out of here, get away, he doesn't know what he's doing, get away!" Sirius shouted drawing the attention of Tonks and Moody from downstairs as they rushed to investigate.
Harry didn't move, he was face to face with an angry werewolf that had just tasted his blood and wanted more as the smell of fresh human meet drove it wild with hunger. He could feel hot blood stained breath as it pulled itself closer to Harry, fighting against the strength of Sirius who was all the time either shouting for Harry to get away or someone else to drag Harry away. Either way he wanted Harry gone, he wanted Harry safe.
Sirius was shouting as he hung on tight to Lupin's back knowing full well that if he let go, if he failed, he would loose Harry forever. The wolf wouldn't bite Harry and turn him into another wolf, another monster like himself. Sirius could cope with that, Harry would still be Harry but no. The wolf was hungry it wanted food and it wanted fresh food, he could chase and tease before he ate it all so there was nothing but bones and ragged clothes left.
"Sirius what happened!" Tonks shouted arriving at the door before Moody who had trouble these days getting up the stairs quickly.
"Just grab Harry and move him!" Sirius shouted back as quick as a flash Tonks grabbed Harry by the arms and literally dragged him back out along the floor until she hit the wall across the other side.
Then quickly running back to help Sirius knock the wolf out and seal up the door so he could howl and thrash around safely in a securely bolted room.
"Harry did he get you, did he bite you!" Sirius asked feverously as Harry drifted in and out of consciousness in his godfather's arms. Both Tonks and Sirius could see the blood from Harry's arm and were both thinking the worse. Lupin despite the wolfsbane had some how lost his sense of self and bitten Harry.
"Sirius!" Harry whispered trying to roll over but Sirius wouldn't let him, he had Harry in his arms and he wasn't about to let go, however much Harry struggled to move away.
"Harry wake up you silly boy, tell me! Did he get you? Did he bite you?" Sirius shouted gently whacking Harry around the face to keep him awake as Moody finally knelt down furious it had taken him so long on the stairs.
"Let me look at his arm, I've seen plenty of wolf bites!" Moody grumbled also more worried than he ever admitted for Harry's well being. Remus or not being a werewolf wasn't easy for anyone.
Sirius rolled Harry onto his side and pulled out the blood soaked arm for Moody to look at but just as he did Harry finally got what he wanted and through up in Sirius's lap, barely missing both Tonks and Moody, who didn't even stop to check but grabbed Harry's arm and pulled his wand out to clear the drying blood and saliva away.
"Well!" Sirius asked impatiently wiping Harry's mouth with his blanket and pulling the rest closer around his now shivering body.
"No this isn't werewolf, looks like he's been cut with a blunt object to get the blood flowing again!" Moody explained flicking his wand so fresh bandages rapped around Harry's arm and stopped the flow.
"Get him in his bed and clear him up. He's had a relapse from that knife I reckon. See, Potters burning up again and shivering. Werewolves go cold when they've been bitten half the life drops out of them." Moody explained as Tonks helped Sirius to rap Harry back up in the blanket and lift him up in Sirius's arms.
"You got him!" She asked, standing up with Sirius who was now almost as white as Harry was, although steady as a leaf and his voice very firm.
"I'll put him back in my room down here." He explained carrying Harry's limp shaky body back downstairs and laying him down gently on his bed.
Meanwhile Moody and Tonks checked that Lupin was securely locked up by adding a few more charms to seal the door.
"I'll stay hear and keep an eye on the room while you go down and explain to the others they have to stop down there to night. Sirius can lock him and Harry in but it'd be best to keep the others well out of harms way. We don't want any accidental temptation." Moody ordered as they could clearly hear the ripping and howling of Lupin fruitlessly trying to get to his prey.
"He's going to be devastated when he wakes up isn't he? Did you see what happened?" Tonks asked before turning away.
"Yes he is and no I only saw part of it, I was checking the perimeters when Harry stumbled in hear. Can't think how though, Lupin never forgets to lock his door just in case but the taste of blood must have pushed him over the edge?" Moody grumbled as Tonks went down the stairs after Sirius.
"Moody says lock yourself in till morning. Just in case Lupin has a few more problems tonight.' Sirius nodded in agreement and half turned his face to her but she could tell his quiet pale hands were absolutely terrified something horrible might happen to Harry and he'd have no control over it.
'Don't worry Sirius so much, Harry will be ok, he's a tough lad isn't he!" Tonks explained trying to give Sirius some comfort as he pulled Harry out of his sweaty clothes and cleared a second wave of vomit off the sheets.
"I know." He mumbled back but really he meant 'I hope so'. He just didn't seem to 'know' anything anymore when it came to Harry.
The following morning Harry had finally dosed off in Sirius's arms who was himself wide awake watching Harry sleep. Lupin woke from what he thought was a most dreadful nightmare but what he soon realized was true seeing the broken furniture, the claw marks and the feeling of pain across his back where he'd scratched and bitten himself in frustration of having no prey to chase.
Mrs Weasley was also very annoyed this morning, having been forced to sleep downstairs by Moody with everyone else until Lupin had fully returned to normal. She had insisted in going to see Harry even claiming that she wouldn't interfere with Sirius provided she got to see Harry was ok. This continued for over an hour until Ginny bellowed at her mother that
'there was no point going to see if Harry was ok as Sirius had already sealed the door and he obviously wasn't ok, having being almost ripped to shreds by Lupin!'
This had itself caused so much shock as to keep the entire room in stunned silence for twenty minuets while Moody paced the hallway outside Lupin's door and Tonks went off to cover Moody's shift at the Ministry claiming at least Moody might get to see some action tonight.
After Mr Weasley had returned home to find a suddenly hysterical wife, a half asleep son and daughter and Hermione deep in thought about Kresher and weather he could be blamed for this accident or not, he decided the best thing was for breakfast and then bed for the lot of them while he went to speak with Moody for his opinion on Lupin.
"What do you think happened?" Sirius asked from his bedroom doorway as Harry slept in a dreamless sleep and Moody hobbled down the steps to meet Arthur confident that Lupin was now sleeping as the growling and howling had finally stopped and he'd already started to change back.
"I'm not sure precisely but it's obvious something dodgy is going off. If those aren't werewolf scratches on Harry's arm and Kresher is banned from being near Harry, then how on earth did he manage to come by them a second time?" Moody pondered.
Mr Weasley sighed not wanting to deliver any desperately sad news to Sirius when he was clearly tired and worn out from being up all night watching. Finally after arguing with himself he decided there was nothing for it but to simply come out with it.
"Hermione thinks he's cutting himself when no ones around." Arthur explained quickly, quietly and firmly.
"And you think she's right don't you?" Moody asked as Sirius's head sank even further down.
"Unfortunately yes. Well, it would all fit, he's hardly himself is he and if he's doing it for what ever reason then it would explain a lot? I'm sorry Sirius, I hope it isn't true, I care about him too you know." Mr Weasley added seeing the clear look of loss and sorrow on Sirius's face.
"It's ok, you could be wrong. I hope your wrong. But he really isn't himself and after what Hermione told me a few days ago I hardly know what to make of anything these past few days. One minuet he seems normal the next he's running off and hiding by himself and passing in and out of consciousness. Have you ever come across something like this before?" Sirius asked hoping Mr Weasley's many years of raising young boys would shed some light on it.
"No but I know self harm isn't exactly considered uncommon in the muggle world, particularly at the moment!" Mr Weasley explained having been a keen reader of muggle newspapers and statistics in his spare time.
"It isn't?" Sirius asked shocked that anyone as honest and innocent as Harry could seriously take to hurting himself like this odd man was implying.
"What did Hermione tell you a few days ago?" Moody asked as his eye began spinning between Lupin stirring and Harry drifting.
"Oh,' Sirius suddenly remembered as he came out of his horrified dream world.
'Harry was mugged walking home when he was at the Dursley's. He didn't want to tell anyone because they'd kicked him out for the evening and he was wandering around the streets by himself all night after I'd made him promise not to."
Sirius explained his eyes finally showing how hurt and frustrated he was. Sirius was beginning to feel it was entirely all his fault again, if he hadn't made Harry promise he would have been far more open about things with him. If he'd fought harder to keep Harry with him he wouldn't have been forced out in the streets by the Dursley's. He had a hundred different things running around his head that he could have done to prevent this and was so rapped up in it, he didn't even notice Lupin staggering down the steps towards them limping and leaning on a walking stick having torn into his own flesh only a few hours before.
"Remus, how do you feel?" Sirius suddenly asked concerned by the deep scratch across his friends face and his steady limp towards them.
"What did I do?" He growled still feeling the monster inside as it fought tirelessly to get out.
"Nothing, you just needed to be locked up better that was all." Sirius explained, not wanting his friend to know what he could have done if he'd got free.
"Tell me what I did! I can taste someone else's blood in my mouth, how did it get there! What did I do!" Lupin bellowed grabbing Sirius by his shirt and losing the balance in his legs as Sirius quickly grabbed him around the middle, pulled him back up straight as Remus flinched at the pain shooting down his back and left leg.
"Nothing, you didn't get anyone. You just needed locking up better this one time that was all. We sealed the door and kept you in there as long for as as you needed it!' Sirius tried to explain as he held his friend up by the arms but the determined glare in Lupin's eyes were clear, he wasn't going to be fobbed off easily, Sirius was going to have to come up with something better than that. Sirius though, after several minuets of painful silence started to explain a little more.
'Someone just stumbled in on you when you were changing, that's all. It wasn't your fault, I don't blame you! No-one who counts does neither!" Sirius tried his best to cover the truth from his friend knowing he really didn't blame him and was determined to keep him living with him. But he also knew Lupin's temper, he hated being a monster and the thought of even getting anywhere near someone to hurt them was too much for him. He much preferred to suffer alone with every body else safe from him, particularly those he cared about.
"No one who counts! What the hells that supposed to mean? And DON'T LIE TO ME! You were always a terrible liar Sirius! What did I do, WHO DID I GET?" He shouted louder as his legs gave way again to make him tumble down into Sirius's open arms.
"Sirius he's waking up. Let me talk to Remus for a bit? You go and sit with him he'll be a bit disorientated again." Moody growled as Sirius let Lupin finally sink down into a chair.
"I don't blame you, it wasn't your fault!" Sirius explained firmly gripping him painfully by the shoulders and trying to make his old friend see sense.
"It's Harry isn't it?" Lupin asked finally realising his worst fear of living with Sirius, with anybody. His potion hadn't worked and he'd bitten Harry, Harry his friend's son and godson. How could he face anybody now, let alone Sirius and now he knew Harry was laying there in that Sirius's bed starting the fever that will eventually mean this time next month he'd been a fully grown monster like Lupin?
"He'll be fine Lupin; Sirius really doesn't blame you, he's just a bit upset that's all." Mr Weasley explained looking down at Lupin who was now shaking his head in his hands.
"What do you mean he'll be fine, I've got his blood in my mouth how can he be fine, he'll turn out to be a monster, like me?" Lupin cried shaking from head to foot now, so ashamed of himself, of what he was, that he couldn't even look at his own hands anymore he had to shut his eyes up tight.
"You didn't bite him, he just got himself scratched that was all and stumbled in on you. Sirius tied you back though that's why you've got rope burns around your neck. Tonks dragged him out the way and we sealed you in until morning everything turned out fine. Harry's just unwell that's all, the Benzar isn't working properly anymore and that's probably why he keeps being sick."
"I, I scratched at him, how close was I and that still doesn't explain the smell? What aren't you telling me?" Lupin asked from behind his cut fingers not able to look either of the two men in the eyes anymore.
"Lupin you didn't bite him honestly. Tonks said you were licking at his wound when Sirius dragged you back. Don't you remember any of it, you were chewing on the bed post to try and taste your own blood. Drive the smell of Harry away until someone came."
"No, I just remember him falling through the door and shouting at him to go away. He wouldn't get up and I couldn't help myself, I was so angry!" Lupin racked his brain trying to remember anything more, forcing himself not to growl and consequently making a near by vase explode with his rage.
"Look, go see Harry for your self, his fever's broken and he'll be fine with a bit of rest. Then go back to bed, you look dreadful!" Arthur explained thinking the sight of Harry would calm him enough to make him at least sleep.
"No, I can't, I can't look at him, not now, I can't ever look at him!" Lupin tried to drag himself to his feet but Moody pushed him back down, his legs shaking and his hands turning blue as all the blood dropped out of him.
"It was a lucky accident that won't happen again!" Moody grumbled firmly clearly seeing Mr Weasley's attempts weren't working on Lupin yet.
"We won't allow it!" Mr Weasley added hopefully.
"No it won't, I'm leaving, I'm not staying here, not another night, I can't be around them, I'd have killed the lot of you without even thinking twice about it. I don't want to think what might happen next time I end up in that state. I won't let it happen again!"
He pushed his way up past Moody and back to his room to pack, a new streak of strength retuning to him even if he fell over a few times and stumbled every time he spotted a claw mark somewhere.
"Let him go Moody. He's tired, he'll come around soon enough." Arthur explained as he followed Sirius into his bedroom to see Harry.
"Sirius?" Harry called quietly trying to open his heavy eyes. Every part of his face was covered in cold sweat but now he was awake all he could feel was the heavy weight of his own body crushing him.
"Harry, how do you feel?" Sirius asked pushing Harry's thick hair off his face and feeling his forehead as it slowly retuned to a more normal temperature.
"Sirius?" Harry mumbled not sure who this dark figure was bending over him, cooling his face and pushing thick sweaty chunks of hair out his eyes.
"Yes Harry it's me. You had another rough night, how do you feel now?" Sirius asked hoping this apparent memory loss was just because Harry was still half asleep.
"I'm tired. Sirius?" Harry asked again, still not able to focus on the dark blob before him.
"I know Harry, drink this and then you can go back to sleep. Trust me, it'll help!" Sirius explained softly picking up the bottle of sleeping draft and pouring it into a glass.
"I don't!" Harry mumbled closing his eyes but clearly still some what awake as he shuffled around under the sheets.
"What was that Harry?" Sirius asked, barely catching Harry's shaky whispering voice.
"I want to go home, I want to go to bed." Harry mumbled again.
"You're in bed Harry." Sirius explained trying to pull Harry's back up to a more sitting position so he wouldn't choke on the drink.
"Where's mum?...I want to go bed? Where's mum?" Harry continued in his dreamy quiet voice totally unaware of where he was. Moody and Arthur heard Sirius clearly catch his breath at the sound of Harry asking for his mother but it didn't show in his voice.
"She's sleeping Harry. She'll come see you soon when she wakes up. Now you drink this." Sirius explained softly opening Harry's mouth and pouring the potion down his throat. He laid Harry back down aware of Arthur standing behind Moody in the doorway and wiped his mouth.
"She must be tired from Amy." Harry decided closing his eyes and rolling his head from side to side.
"Amy?" Sirius asked unable to keep the quiet disbelief out of his voice.
"She keeps waking up and crying in the night." Harry mumbled still shuffling around slowly as Sirius tried to cool him again with the others watching on.
"Where's James Harry, have you seen him recently?" Sirius asked indulging guiltily in Harry's hallucination.
"He's been dead years. You know that!' Harry mumbled breathing slower now as he started to drift off.
'That's why you're here. To look after us, like you promised him." Harry finally finished as his voice trailed off and the power of the sleeping potion over took him.
"Yes Harry, that's why I'm here." Sirius replied quietly pulling the covers back over Harry and standing up to put the lid back on the bottle of Dreamless Sleep.
"Sirius he's hallucinating." Moody grumbled leading the way out the room.
"Where's Remus?" Sirius asked wanting to talk to his friend more than ever now.
"I think he's packing, he doesn't want to stay any more. He thinks he got to Harry and we're lying to him to make him feel better." Mr Weasley explained sadly.
"Oh. He doesn't have to go, I want him to stay." Sirius explained quietly leaving Moody to watch over Harry for a while as he went in search of his friend determined to keep him with him no matter what he thought about it.
"How is he Arthur?" Mrs Weasley asked as her husband walked back into the sitting room to find many alert faces thirsty for information.
"He's not doing too well at the moment. Sirius has put him back in a dreamless sleep for now and although his temperature's coming back to normal, he doesn't seem to know where he is." Arthur explained sadly as they all sat down around the table quietly waiting to bombard him with questions.
"How's Lupin?" Ginny asked receiving a rather saucy look from her mother again for the hundredth time that morning.
"He's not doing too well either. Blames himself for it all and seems determined to leave. Sirius is talking him round at the moment, he's about as determined to keep Lupin hear as Lupin is to leave. Sirius is the stubboner of the two though if anyone can help Remus it'll be him." Arthur sighed sure he might get another ear bashing of some sort soon from his wife. He was surprisingly good at telling when these moments were about to happen, mainly because it happened so often.
"Then who's sat with Harry, he needs watching over, Sirius can't just leave him like that!" Molly cried outraged at Sirius's apparent total abandonment of Harry.
"Moody's sat with him. Lupin's really upset by the whole thing and Harry's not going to wake up any time soon. Sirius really doesn't blame him at all and really doesn't want him to go. Now enough, I need to send a message to Dumbledore and you lot need to help Molly clean up breakfast." Mr Weasley explained forcefully getting up.
"Can we go and see him dad?" Ron asked quickly as Mr Weasley started to head to the door.
"Wait until later when he's woken up. Sirius will go mad if you wake him up before he's ready and there's not much point, he's fast asleep at the moment and he needs his rest. Now I really must go and send a message to Dumbledore."