Disclaimer: Joss's world, not mine.
Author's Note: It ends a little awkwardly I think, but better that than forced which is where it was heading.
There may or may not be a another chapter. I've done what I set out to do and only have vague ideas what I think happens next.
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Jayne was not a stupid man. He was not always very bright, but he wasn't really stupid. He also knew a fair amount about the workings of the female body, so it did not take him long to put the pieces together. Mal was staring at Kaylee, looking a little bewildered. Jayne decided he needed to get gone and behind a locked door before Mal recovered enough to start putting the pieces together too. He backed towards the ladder.
"We were in the Black three weeks ago." Mal said in a strangled voice, just as Jayne grabbed the first rung.
"I really thought it was Simon's." Kaylee sniffed. Jayne was up the ladder before Mal finished his second strangled noise.
"You gave Kaylee fish."
Jayne's heart nearly stopped and he stared frozen at the tiny little reader who had obviously been waiting for him. He automatically checked her hands for weapons. She didn't appear armed, but he didn't feel any safer; he knew too well that she didn't need them.
"Ain't my fault your brother was ignoring her," Jayne muttered defensively, wondering if there was any way he could get by her.
River placed one tiny hand on his chest, fingers flexed like claws. "Say that again."
Jayne retreated and nearly fell back into Kaylee's bunk. "She came onta me!"
"You knew she was lonely and you took advantage of her."
"We was just talkin! I never thought she'd try to make anything of it!"
River gave him a disgusted look and stalked off. Jayne lunged towards his bunk and started down the ladder just as Mal started hollering at him from Kaylee's bunk.
Inara had come into the kitchen to get some tea and heard Mal yelling for Jayne. She was not surprised when Kaylee slunk into the mess a few moments later while Mal pounded on Jayne's bunk door.
Kaylee glanced uncertainly at Inara before sitting down at the table. Inara wanted to be mad at her on Simon's behalf, but when she started crying she set the tea things aside and touched her friend's shoulder.
"I really thought it had to be Simon's," Kaylee whispered.
"Kaylee..." Inara began.
Kaylee lifted her head and brushed at her cheeks without looking at Inara. "I know he said he can't have children, but when he told me I was pregnant, I thought sure he had to be wrong."
"But you knew you'd slept with Jayne," Inara pointed out.
"I weren't sure, really. That whole weekend's kinda fuzzy really." She paused for a moment and Inara saw her face screw up. "He hates me, doesn't he?"
Inara sighed. "I don't know Kaylee." Inara glanced in the direction of the passenger dorms and stood up as Mal stormed in, having given up on dragging Jayne out of his bunk for the moment. "He's hurt and confused Kaylee, but I don't know that he hates you." She gathered the tea things, poured the now boiling water into a pot and slipped out of the room.
Mal waited until she left to address the girl he thought of as a little sister. "Mei mei, what were you thinking? I mean, I weren't never happy bout you sleepin with the doc, but he's a good sight better than Jayne! Jayne ain't...he ain't right for you. Why would you sleep with him?"
Kaylee looked up at him briefly but couldn't hold his gaze. She concentrated on her hands and spoke quietly. "Simon and I were fightin bout somethin and then River had that episode and then Simon got sick. I was feelin lonely and sorry for myself and I...I had a little too much a my own engine wine and Jayne found me and ... we was just talking cap'n!"
"Talkin don't get people pregnant Kaylee."
Kaylee sniffled again. "Didn't mean to do any more than talk. We got to talkin bout home and family and we went back to my bunk so I could show him some captures I think and I dunno what happened."
Mal sighed and sat down. "Think it's pretty clear what happened."
Kaylee sniffed. "Yeah, guess it is."
They sat silently for several moments. Mal was thinking morosely that this is why he'd tried to forbid shipboard relationships. Eventually he sighed and stood up.
"Cap'n?"
Mal paused and looked at her. "You gonna raise the baby on my ship?"
Kaylee looked down again. "Ain't really thought about it yet."
"Best you start thinking about it." Mal sighed again and looked at the door. "And I think I'd better go see if I can apologize to Simon."
Simon accepted a cup of tea from Inara and sat back as River took one too.
"It would be wrong to poison Jayne," Simon sighed, picking up the conversation once Inara had poured her own tea. He sounded disappointed.
"I don't think so," River disagreed. She was relieved to see a brief smile cross Simon's face.
"Are you alright Simon?" Inara asked.
Simon stared at the ceiling. "I don't know. I really should have seen this coming, we've been drifting for a while, but...Jayne! Why did she have to sleep with Jayne?"
Inara frowned. "Drifting?"
Simon shrugged tiredly. "It was...fun. And it was good. But...I've been feeling for a while that I was looking for more of a relationship than Kaylee was."
"She cares about you." Inara said softly.
"So do you, it doesn't mean we're meant to be together. It doesn't mean there's anything more. I'd hoped..." he sighed and put his untouched tea on the table and leaned her elbows on his knees, rubbing at his face. "I'd really hoped that Kaylee and I could be more than just friends, but I don't think that's what she wanted. For all that she wanted me to be romantic, she wasn't really interested in developing anything beyond our sex life and I ... I don't think I'm adventurous enough for her in that respect."
"She wouldn't have waited so long for you to pay attention if all she wanted was sex," Inara said quickly, and a little defensively.
"I know it was more than that," Simon started.
"Just not as much as it was to you," River put in.
Simon sighed and stared at the abandoned tea cup. "Whatever Kaylee wanted, it wasn't something serious. And I just...I don't really see the point of a relationship that doesn't have that potential." He sighed again. "We should have ended it before now."
"Then why didn't you?"
Simon shrugged. "I don't know, but I really wish we had."