Kay, so, I know you guys hate me but if you're reading this you either don't hate me that much or your human curiosity has overtaken you and you're wondering how this is going to turn out.
a pretty idea: Thanks for the tips I'm still working on the whole grammar and stuff… English was never my strong point. Also I know they're sort of past that but I like the awkwardness so I decided to use it.
I DON'T OWN THE 39 CLUES!
Ian wakes with a start, in a cold sweat. He is breathing hard and his heart is racing. He looks around. He's in his house. He's not fifteen. He's thirty-two.
And Amy's not dead.
She's right next to him, sleeping peacefully.
Ian smiles. Oh thank God! He thinks. It was only just a dream! (A/N Yes I did that on purpose!)
Ian goes into the bathroom and splashes cold water on his face. Just a dream, just a dream. He keeps telling himself.
He's still shaken. The dream was so real.
He looks at the clock. Five in the morning. He knows he won't be able to get back to sleep so he doesn't bother trying.
To help convince himself that the dream wasn't real he walks around the house.
In the first room is thirteen-month-old baby Luke who is sleeping with his thumb in his mouth and a stuffed snake in his other hand. Like Hercules Ian thinks. He strangled a snake when he was just a baby.
For some reason when Luke was reading an animal picture book (Amy insisted that, even at eight months, he needed to learn the joy of books.) He didn't care for many of the furry critters, in fact he was afraid of the rabbit, but he took a particular liking to the snakes.
Ian watches him for a while. With his black hair, olive skin and handsome face he looks a lot like Ian did as a baby except for Amy's beautiful green eyes.
He seems to know that Ian is watching him because he starts to wake.
"Luke it's just me. Go back to sleep little guy."
Luke is comforted by his father's voice and goes back to sleep.
Ian leaves the room, so not to wake him up again. Amy needed her sleep.
In the next room is ten-year-old Madeline. Her room is all hot pink and black. Her favorite colors. She needs to stop spending so much time with Natalie. Ian thinks, seeing the fashion magazines everywhere and the posters of famous singers covering the wall and floor.
She also has long black hair but, unlike Luke, her skin is paler, more like Amy's, and her eyes are amber like Ian's.
"Black goes with anything" She mumbles in her sleep. Yep, way too much time with Natalie.
The last room is their oldest, thirteen-year-old Cam. He looks almost exactly like Amy, shaggy red hair, green eyes and light skin. He is sprawled out on his bed, glasses still on, with Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Last Olympian on his chest.
So like his mother Ian thinks. He can remember so many nights when she had fallen asleep reading.
There are stacks and stacks of book all over his room. The walls are covered with movie posters, a few pictures of some famous actresses and a few adds for his uncle Dan's video games.
Ian looks at Cam's stack of books labeled Too Read. The first book is titled The 39 Clues: Maze of Bones.
Oh no. Ian thinks. Cam is almost finished with the book he's reading now so he'll be on this one soon. Okay. I'll talk to Amy in the morning. We need to have a family meeting about this.
Ian takes off Cam's glasses, puts the book on the dresser and pulls the blanket over him.
When Ian gets back to his room Amy is sitting on the bed reading.
"Love, what are you doing up? It's five-thirty in the morning!"
"I could ask you the same question. I couldn't sleep. I assume you couldn't either."
"Yeah. I woke up from a dream and I've just been trying to convince myself that it wasn't real."
"Tell me about it" She says closing her book.
"Well, we were fifteen. We were attacking a Vesper stronghold and during the attack. You were killed."
"So waking up seventeen years older with me, obviously alive didn't convince you?" She smiles.
"It was realistic! I needed more proof."
Amy leans over and kisses him. "Proof enough?"
"Hmm… I think I need more convincing." Ian smirks, kissing her.
They are interrupted when Luke began to cry in the other room.
"Does that boy ever sleep?" Amy wonders out loud.
She gets up to see what he needs.
When she returns Ian decides to tell her about Cam's book choices.
"I was in Cam's room and one of his books was Maze of Bones."
"What are you saying? You know how he is once he decides to read a book. We can't exactly keep him from reading it."
"I know, love. I think it's about time we tell them about the hunt."
"Are you sure?"
"Love, we have to! They can't go their whole lives thinking that their Kabra grandparents are dead and that the fire that killed their Cahill grandparents was an electric plug accident!"
"But…"
"Amy, we have to. Tomorrow is Saturday. We can call a family meeting in the morning and give them the whole weekend for it to sink in."
Amy sighs. "Okay. That's a deal." She thinks for a minute. "But you know Madeline can't keep a secret. We can't have her telling everyone."
"We'll just have to trust her to keep her mouth shut, love."
Amy smiles. "Ian, you've been calling me love a lot. More than usual."
Ian smirks. "I guess the fifteen-year-old me hasn't completely worn off."
~~~~~~~The Next Day~~~~~~~
Ian wakes up at nine the next morning. When did I fall asleep? He wonders. Ian looks next to him. Amy's not there. Poor Amy must've been up early with Luke.
Ian got up, showered and got dressed. Amy was in the kitchen trying to put some kind of baby food into Luke's mouth but in the end she just ended up looking stupid making those "zoom" sounds and motions. Luke is not a normal kid. He has some kind of dignity to him. As if he knows that mashed up carrots are below him. He is so his father's son!
Ian laughs.
"Don't laugh! It worked on the other two!"
"You haven't figured out that Luke is different yet?"
"I have actually. He seems to have inherited your personality!"
"I'm offended." Ian says dramatically.
"Oh, you know I love you!"
"Love you too."
Ian makes some coffee and goes into the living room where Madeline is already up texting her friend.
"Morning, darling. Who are you texting at nine in the morning?"
"Sierra, Liz, Kat, and Nate." She responds, saying the last name quietly.
"Who's Nate?" Ian asks, raising his eyebrows.
"No one."
"Sure. And your mother is no one either."
"Just a friend from school, dad!"
Ian laughs. "Okay, what ever you say."
About five minutes later there's glass breaking in the kitchen. "AW MAN!" Amy shouts.
Ian runs into the kitchen to see Amy trying to clean up the broken jar of baby food and Luke sitting in his highchair smirking.
"Wow. That kid is such a Kabra!" Ian says.
"I know! He refuses to eat this!"
"Maybe he just doesn't like carrots?" Ian suggests, helping Amy clean up the mess.
"I figured that out when he shoved it off the tray!"
By time they finally get Luke to eat something it's quarter to eleven and Cam comes into the kitchen, still half asleep, hair messed up.
"It's about time, sleepy head!" Amy says as Cam gets a poptart out of the cabinet.
"Mom, I'm a teenager. We stay up late and wake up late. Get used to it." He says, shrugging.
"Well since everyone's awake now, I think it's time to make our announcement." Ian decides.
"Oh no, please not another baby!" Cam says. "Isn't three enough?"
"Well if it was what would you do about it?" Amy asks her son.
"Point taken…"
"MADELINE HOPE CAHILL! PUT THE PHONE DOWN AND GET IN HERE! FAMILY MEETING!" Ian yells into the next room.
"Oh no, please don't be-"
"We aren't having another baby, Madeline!" Ian tells her.
"Okay so what's the news?"
"Sit down. This'll be a while." Amy tells her.
When everyone is seated Ian clears his throat.
"Cam, I noticed that you're planning to read the thirty-nine clues series." Ian says.
"Yeah, what about it?" Cam asks.
"Well… you found that under the fiction section right?"
"Yeah."
"Well… they're not fiction."
"Wait, thirty-nine clues… that sound familiar… Liz was telling me about those! She loved them! They're about. Like, a family treasure hunt around the world and the clues are from like historic characters right?" Madeline asks
"A little more than that but, yeah, that's close." Amy told her.
"Wait so they're real? Why is that so important?" Cam asks.
"Well, I'm just going to say it, your mother and your uncle Dan are the main characters!"
Silence.
"So… you're the Amy Cahill? It's not just a coincidence?" Cam asked his mom.
"Yeah pretty much." Amy replies.
Cam turns to his father. "And your Ian Kabra?"
"Yeah pretty much…" Ian says. "But please don't hate me. I was under the influence of my mother, your grandmother Kabra."
"Didn't grandma and grandpa Kabra die in a car crash?" Madeline asks.
"No your grandmother is in jail for life and your grandfather disappeared after his wife was sent to jail and no one has heard from him" Amy explains.
"Why is she in jail?" Cam asks.
"For killing your grandmother and grandfather Cahill," Ian says sadly.
The kids gasp. Even Luke has stopped smirking and is looking at his family in shock.
"Wait. So when Liz was obsessing over how cute Ian and Amy are together she was talking about my parents? Ew to the millionth power!" Madeline shrieks.
"See Amy! I told you I wasn't the only one who thought so!" Ian tells her.
"Ian that was seventeen years ago! Let it go already!" Amy says.
"Umm you were saying?" Cam says trying to get his parents back to their story.
"Right. Well about five hundred years ago there was a scientist, Gideon Cahill, he had four kids, Luke, Thomas, Katherine and Jane." Ian begins the story.
"Luke? Is that who Luke is named for?" Cam asks.
Amy nods and Ian continues the story.
"Gideon was trying create this serum that would make a person well pretty much a super human.
When Gideon got it he divided it into four parts and gave one part to each of his kids. Luke's serum had skills for trickery, cunning, and leadership. Thomas got athletic skills. Katherine got smarts and Jane got a talent for the arts, music, writing, and acting, that stuff.
And one day Gideon's lab burned down and he died. All the Cahills blamed each other for the fire and ended up hating each other. They became the four Cahill branches. Lucian for Luke, Tomas for Thomas, Ekaterina or Ekat for Katherine and Janus for Jane. Ever since the branches have fought each other for the clues to make the serum. But what they didn't know was that Gideon's wife was pregnant with their fifth child, Madeline."
"Like me! Was I named after her?"
"Yes you were." Amy says.
"And when Madeline was born she was raised by her mother that the most important thing was to reunite the Cahill branches. When her mother died that was her quest and the quest of all her descendants. To reunite the Cahills no matter what it takes. Her branch became the Madrigals. And then, five hundred years later, Grace Cahill, one of the head Madrigals died. In her will she left the quest for the thirty-nine clues to forty people. Your mother, uncle Dan, aunt Natalie and I were four of them. We had the option of a million dollars or the hunt. Fifteen of the forty people took the hunt and became seven teams. The Holts, your second-cousins Hamilton Madison and Reagan along with their parents, your late great-uncle Alistair Oh, your late great-aunt Irina Spansky, your second cousins Ned Ted and Sinead Starling, your mother and uncle Dan and your aunt Natalie and I. People were truly nasty getting these clues. Especially my mother, Isabel Kabra. She threatened to kill my sister and I if we didn't do as she told us! She was truly heartless."
Ian pauses.
"What's the worst thing she made you do?" Madeline asks.
"Your asking for a love story you know" Ian warns her. Cam and Luke roll their eyes but Madeline nods telling him to go on.
"Okay you asked for it. No complaints."
Madeline just nods
"The worst thing Isabel made me so was trick your mother. We were fourteen and Isabel knew that it wouldn't take much to charm Amy for her clues. Being afraid of Isabel, I agreed. The plan was to make Amy fall for me, gain her trust, get her clues, then kill her."
Ian looks around. Everyone is glaring at him.
"Hey! Remember my life was on the line here! Plus I wasn't the nicest guy in the world back then! Messing with a girl was no big deal."
More glares.
"Anyway I started flirting with her as soon as we met up. Even simple things like touching her hand or looking at her made her blush. I knew this was going to be too easy. Or I thought it would. Somewhere between watching her dance around uncle Alistair's lawn and seeing watching her amazement at his little secret room I started to notice that I was watching her too much. That she was in too many thoughts. My heart beat too many times in a minute around her. Too many nights I closed my eyes and saw her. That's when I realized that there was something wrong. This wasn't supposed to happen. I was supposed to win her over, get her clues, and kill her. But for some reason every time I saw her I hated that idea more and more. The idea if hurting her made me angry with myself. But then I'd think of the death threat hanging over my head and I knew that I'd just have to shake off the fluttery feelings and continue the plan.
When the time came I was miserable. By then I had given up all hope that the feelings would go away and admitted to myself that I had a crush on her. The two things that were always on my mind were, one, how much I wanted to kiss her and two, that Id have to kill her. Looking back on it I don't even know how I managed to keep a confident face the whole time when inside I was a wreck. Betraying her was the last thing I wanted to do. I knew I would hurt her, lose her trust, and she would never take me back. If she even lived. Yet somehow I forced myself to pull out that gun, and back out if the cave sealing her in with Dan and Alistair.
Even to this day I still haven't forgiven myself. For years I felt guilty. At first I thought that not being around her, the crush and guilt would fade away. Emotions usually do. But being away from her just made it worse. It went from a little crush to a kind of obsession to love so strong it hurt. After that I would attempt to flirt with her every time I saw her but she would either walk away, kick me, or call the cops on me."
"Ian, that was one time! And you were practically stalking me! What else was I supposed to do?" Amy says laughing.
"Oh I don't know, maybe finally realize that I was hopelessly in love with you?" Ian says sarcastically.
"Get back to the story!" Madeline says eagerly.
"Right. Well that's it really. That was the worst thing Isabel ever made me do. Today if someone made me do that I'd kill them."
Madeline and Cam give him a startled look.
"IAN!" Amy scolds.
"Sorry! Habit!"
"What about you mom? What made you finally except that dad really loved you?" Cam asks.
Everyone looks at him weirdly.
"What? I had to listen to it and it's hard not to get caught up in a good story!"
Amy smiles. "Well, the whole time I was so angry with myself for not letting go of my crush after he tried to kill me that I had convinced myself that he'd never feel the same way. I had blinded myself to see his come ons as nothing but another scheme. Eventually though your aunt Nellie cleared it all up. She came in my room one night when I was sixteen and said 'AMY CAHILL THAT COBRA BOY IS AT THE DOOR AGAIN AND WON'T LEAVE UNTIL HE TALKS TO YOU! THE BOY'S IN LOVE WITH YOU HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO TORTURE HIM?'" Amy explains.
"So what'd you do?" asks Madeline.
"Well what else could I do? I went out there to see what he had to say. I went to the door and as soon as I stepped onto the porch he grabbed me and kissed me before I could ask why he was there. I don't think he would have ever stopped either except the fact that the door was hanging open and my brother started wolf whistling at us. When I closed the door he looked me in the eyes and said 'Amy Cahill, I can't take it anymore! I'm in love with you and if you don't tell me how you feel right now I'm going to go insane!'
Then I said 'I love you too, Ian.' and then two years later we got married and now, fourteen years later, here we are." Amy finishes.
"Wow!" Cam says. " Most parents love stories go like 'we met in collage, started dating got married and blah blah blah'. This is MUCH cooler!"
"It's so cute!" Madeline squealed. "I can't tell anyone though can I?"
"Nope. Sorry, darling, but this is top secret." Ian tells her.
"Now when I read the book I'll know the full version! Not the two hundred page version that the rest of the world knows!" Cam says.
"Do you really need to read the book now?" Madeline asks her brother.
"Yes! Now there's even more reason to!"
Ian laughs. "You sound so much like your mum!" he tells his son.
Ian's glad that the kids know their story now.
He looks at his family who are discussing the hunt.
Ian thinks about his dream. Thank you, Lord. He thinks. Thank you for this wonderful life.
ALL DONE! Yeah so they're alive! You either forgive me or hate me ore now right? This was my lame attempt at an April fools joke… another lame one that I did was used a red, non-toxic, washable marker and colored the spouts of the water fountains at school. That backfired because I couldn't drink from it either… anyway hope you like this! I was up till one this morning witting it on my iPod!
Interview with Ian and Amy:
Bookgirl39: Hey Amy and Ian what did you think?
Amy: Ew! That is SO not my future
Ian: I agree, who made you psycic?
Bookgirl39: I have my sources...
Amy: I would NEVER marry Ian! *shudders*
Ian: Love, you know that you love me!
Amy: Don't call me that!
Ian: No can do, love.
Amy: You're so annoying!
Ian: And you love it!
Amy: You know, Ian, I think you're just saying that because you like me.
Ian: No I'm saying it because you like me.
Amy: Sure whatever you want to believe.
Bookgirl39: So back on topic, what exactly are your thoughts on the story?
Amy: That this will never happen.
Ian: That it's nice to know what our kids would be like.
Amy: IAN!
Ian: What?
Bookgirl39: Well that's all the time we have for today... No! Amy! Put. The pointy stick. down! *runs over and tries to keep them from killing each other.*