Bred
By MoneyTunes10
Chapter Seven
Annotation: A big thank you to MarchHare5 for formatting tip and suggestion with the plot. It made me reflect on all the underlying themes within the story; it is much more than a romance. There may be some themes that are sensitive to some, please know that I write with the utmost respect. I do not want to diminish anyone's experiences or feelings when I delve into situations of abuse, abandonment or rejection. As I have previously mentioned I appreciate all types of reviews, even the critical ones because it helps me to demand excellence of myself. Once again, thank you so much for taking the time to read.
The worst abuse is sometimes not the one that leaves a visible mark on the skin.
It is possible to inflict psychological torture by changing a human's mind into that of a vessel lacking self-awareness. This is a disturbingly accurate picture of Bella's life at the Agency. Her experience left her in a place where she yearns for children, yet she is emotionally unprepared for them.
The Agency made the girls feel like they were part of an elite society; they were above needing any type love to fulfill their purpose. Chosen at a young age to further the hybrid race was an honor. She was so entranced by her teachings that guilt devoured her whenever she longed for her parents' love. Mistress reminded them that this need for love made them weak. They should embrace the idea of love but never participate in it. Bella found it difficult, so she chose to simply ignore her feelings altogether. She excelled at this task and was praised for it. It started with her Mistress, and now she was ready to overlook her feelings to make the Cullens happy. With this method, she hoped to be loved.
To Bella, children were an item on a checklist; they were a means to fulfill her purpose. There was never an opportunity for her to understand that children were more than products of a contract. They were a living tribute to love itself. They were the best parts of two individuals brought to life.
Bella's need to have children and her need to be loved were undisputedly intertwined. She wanted someone to love her and a child's love would fulfill the need in her. There was also a rebellious part that wanted to prove that she could be a better parent than her own. Years of ignoring her feelings left Bella alone with her turmoil…suffering in silence.
This was a problem because the Cullens seemed to want her to explore her own feelings. The very idea of no longer living to please those around her caused a schism that threatened to rupture Bella's mind.
As Emmet drove home, she focused on the mantras that she has learned all her life. She needed reinforcement from her training to explain the longing that she felt when she saw the children's interaction with their parents. The blatant love that was displayed between child and parent was lacking in her own life and the realization haunted her.
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The week progressed with Bella accompanying Emmett to the store. She worked well with Michael who was taken with Bella. He was more than pleased when Bella started to ask him about himself and what it felt like to live without a purpose. The question threw him off but soon he understood Bella's fascination. They spent hours talking as they worked side-by-side. After each conversation with Michael, Bella thought about the parallels in her life. She would sometimes spend hours lost in her thoughts.
One of her actions that she began to question had to do with her eating habits and exercise regime. It was the end of the week when Michael tried to share an ice-cream sundae with Bella. He was determined after he found out that she never had ice-cream. She explained that she ate frozen yogurt as a healthier alternative. She finally conceded when Michael got down on his knees to beg while there were customers in the store. Emmett, of course, laughed at a blushing Bella and winked as she left with Michael.
Bella discovered that she loved ice-cream sundaes. She did acknowledge that it was too much sugar at once and it would not become a daily habit. Yet it left a lasting effect on her.
She took that night to think about the countless hours she spent exercising or planning her next meal. The only reasons she did these things was to have a healthy pregnancy. Her actions were not to increase her lifespan, they to increase the likelihood of a healthy child. The ice-cream sundae was her first experience with junk food and it troubled her. It wasn't the schedule of always eating certain foods or working out that bothered her, it was the reasons behind her actions.
Jasper was a bit thrown when Bella came back from her first day with Emmett. He felt a sadness that deepened throughout the week. His family had always been careful with their emotions when they were around him. They knew the constant inference their feelings caused but Bella was unaware of the Cullen's abilities. Jasper concluded that Bella's feelings had been subdued until she spent her first day with Emmett.
He recently felt an immense amount of confusion from her. He mentioned it to Edward, who was already feeling confused by his need to shelter Bella.
Edward felt guilty for bringing Bella into his mess of a life so he confessed his worries to Carlisle. He was assured that the family would alert him, if he repeated his mistakes. He didn't want his guilt to cloud his judgment; he wanted Bella to make the right decisions for herself without his interference. When he did talk to Jasper about Bella's feelings, he understood that it would be difficult. Not only was Bella confused but she seemed to be holding her emotions back. He worried that that she would implode if she didn't express herself.
The family met throughout the week as Bella slept. They wanted to get her to open up to someone about her past and her needs. They wanted her to explore the emotions she kept within her. Edward was the closest to Bella; simply because they were suppose to have a child together. They noticed that she instinctively was closer to him because of the expected intimacy. They all agreed that it was a great idea to keep teaching Bella how to play the piano in exchange for her history.
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It was a random evening when Bella decided to go for a run. She remained on the Cullen grounds and was twenty minutes into her run when she stopped. All of the tension from the week came crashing down on her. She dropped to her knees and wept. She wept for the parents she never knew, she wept for the longing she felt when she saw those children and she wept because she hadn't cried in such a long time. It was a relief to simply cry for no other reason than to cry. She tried so hard for so long to please everyone and she was weary. She just wanted to cry. She was happy that she was far away from the house that no one, vampire or human, could hear her. She knew her eyes were probably blotchy and her nose was red so she tried to enter the house a quietly and calmly as possible.
Her steps were slow and measured; she didn't want anyone to see that she was crying. She was going up the stairs to her room when she spotted Edward at the end of the hallway.
"Bella, what's wrong?"
He moved so quickly that Bella gasped; she had only blinked when he moved from down the hallway to stand before her.
It was evident that she was crying. His eyes roamed her body to note that there were several bruises on her arms and legs. Some seemed to be old but there were new ones forming.
"Who did this to you?"
Bella followed Edward's eyes to the irregular patterns of bruises she had amasses from coaching with Emmett. "Oh, these are from the kids I coach with Emmett," Bella pointed to her bruises while looking at Edward's hardened expression. "And I'm fine; I just went for a run."
Bella sidestepped Edward, since she was afraid that he was angry with her. Before she entered the shower, she heard Edward yell at Emmett.
Edward was angry when he saw the purple discolorations on Bella's arms and shins. He was in a heated discussion with Emmett about the dangers of allowing a human to get in the way of running hybrid children, when Bella interrupted.
"Edward, do you have time to help me with dinner?"
Edward glanced between Bella and Emmett as if trying to figure out if Emmett had somehow gotten Bella to rescue him.
Of course Emmett winked at Bella as Edward walked towards her. This earned Emmett a small smile from Bella.
Dinner took place in silence and after eating, Bella went to the study to get a book to clear her mind. She heard Edward's music float down the hall to her and it only helped to soothe her.
Bella had no recollection of dozing off in the armchair but she was being shaken by someone.
"Bella, wake up!"
Edward's amber eyes swirled with worry as he looked at Bella. She was having a nightmare but she had no memory of her dreams. Her mind immediately went to her time in the Agency. She was so used to having nightmares when she lived there that it wasn't unusual for her to forget her dreams.
She remained in the large armchair as Edward took the seat across from her on a large couch.
"Edward, do you know how the Agency was created? I'm not ungrateful; I just wondered what would possess someone to give a human to an institution like that."
He suspected that she got the abridged version of what occurred to get these humans and vampires to co-exist in a symbiotic relationship. He didn't want to tell her all the political strife that was endured by both parties but she had a right to know how the world functioned.
"To understand the reasons for the Agency, it's important to know the truth about humans and vampires."
Bella gave him her undivided attention.
Long before Bella was born and long before the public was aware of the existence of the vampires, they were introduced to the human leaders of the world. In a time where the economy was in turmoil, these human leaders needed financial salvation. Not only were humans unwilling to give up their wealth, they wanted their nations to prosper.
Vampires, who were leaders in the vampiric community, decided to approach these leaders. Their long lives gave them the luxury of amassing unthinkable wealth with which they could buy and sell some of the most prestigious nations.
Human leaders were at a disadvantage during the negotiations with the vampires. So in exchange for pouring their wealth into the economy, they wanted the humans to reveal the existence of vampires. Vampires were tired of living underground like sewer rats; they wanted the freedom to walk the earth as they pleased. They also wanted to have a say in the leadership of the world since vampires needed humans too. They worried about the impending scarcity due to economic hardship; poverty always brought on numerous diseases that killed humans in droves. It meant that the vampires would lose a large amount of their food supply; thus they took preventative methods. They thought their contributions to the leadership of the world would prevent future economic disasters.
Soon the humans became figureheads; the vampires became the puppeteers. Vampires had more experience since they lived longer lives. They lived through the reign of many different humans and had been privy to all the mistakes that humans frequently made.
Integration was very tumultuous; humans naturally were rebellious when they found out that their natural predators had a hold over them. It took a long time to get a treaty between the two groups; new laws needed enforcement and it took some time to implement. In the end, the vampire leaders who made financial contributions were responsible for all the vampire-human interactions in their chosen locations. The Volturi, Denali and Cullen clans represented the United States of America, Canada and large portions of Europe. Other countries were represented by various other clans.
One of the hardest laws to enforce was the outlawing of human hunting. In lieu of draining humans, human blood was donated to a blood bank that specifically catered to vampires. Many vampires decided to feed only on animals as act of peace. Any vampire that broke the laws was dealt with by the vampires responsible for the area the crime occurred.
The most hated law was one that required all humans to be represented by a vampire clan in a leadership position. Thus humans who lived in the United States, Canada, or Europe were represented by the Volturi-Denali-Cullen clans. The Volturi did this as their full time job while the Denalis and Cullens only stepped in when it was necessary; they preferred to live normal lives. The Cullens resided in the United States, the Denalis lived in either Canada or Alaska, and the Volturi lived in Italy.
The only humans without representatives were the Substitutes that lived in the Agency. In a twisted way, they were the only free humans. Yet they could be claimed by any vampire from any part of the world.
The Agency came out of a need for children. It was forbidden to turn a child into a vampire because of the volatile nature of young vampires. One eccentric vampire wanted to give his wife the gift of a child. He knew his wife always wanted children and could never have them. He hypothesized that vampires could have children with human women and he finally got a human female to agree to try to have a child with him. They had three children together.
Her pregnancies resembled a normal human female pregnancy. She even had natural births at home. The children appeared to be a normal except for their brain development, which seemed accelerated. They formed a family and continued to try to have more children. It was only after the last birth that things went bad. The human had lost too much blood during birth and they rushed her to the hospital…it was too late.
The Volturi came to investigate since the human's baby was not brought to the hospital by the vampires who came with her. That's when they found all three hybrid children and took the entire family to Italy to study the children. They found that the hybrid children developed at an accelerated rate when compare to human children until puberty came; then their growth was exponential before it ceased altogether.
The entire incident caused an upheaval in both human and vampire communities. Humans didn't want to feel like cattle waiting to be slaughtered or bred. Vampires who longed for a family thought they should given the opportunity to have children.
The Agency was birthed out of the requirement to fulfill the needs of vampires who desired children. Hybrids were ideal because they offered vampires the chance to experience their child's growth yet the children did not die. The Agency created locations all over the world. Humans were given the opportunity to leave their children with the Agency instead of orphanages and they reaped great financial compensations. They were also assured that their children would be cared for and well-educated.
"That's the short version Bella, is that what it was really like for you at the Agency?"