Title: Huis clos
Author: Haldol
Translator: Shannon
Fan-Fic Of: Criminal Minds
Theme(s): Angst, Crime, Drama,
Rating: M
Warnings: Abuse, M/M, Rape
Note: I translated it to the best of my ability so you might or may mot get confused. If you do I'm very sorry!
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Chapter 11
Reid curled in a corner of the hut, had a blank stare. His sunken eyes seemed dead.
He thought he had seen the worst, have all endured.
But hell was so like the universe: infinite .
Reid would have given anything to God that will finally put an end to his suffering and that there, at this precise moment, he may be killed.
... The death was the only way out.
Nobody would ever help him. Or Hotch, or Jason, or Morgan ... Nobody . The FBI had failed miserably. Reid was now convinced. It was over.
And Tobias did not slacken ... even less now that Reid knew .
Spencer felt suddenly guilty of naivety or blindness. Maybe both ...
He tried to be honest with himself. In reality, no one had he not always known? Do not even had it looked a bit?
The young man closed his eyes for a moment, making up his memories to the surface of his memory ...
Tobias hands on him, soft and tender gestures, and personal... their bodies. Reid saw huddled in the arms of Tobias, nestled against his bare chest, breathing his skin, his sweaty, drunk with the smell of his body ... He liked to feel embraced and protected, touched, caressed... but not until then, no, not far...!
He felt himself sliding inexorably toward a kind of final collapse. Tobias had taken everything: his freedom, his will, his dignity ... Reid, mentally, corrected: almost all taken. Tobias had not yet fully owned...
But this does not delay, right?, Thought Reid. He had to be ready for this particular requirement. Because it would apply, is not it? Reid had confidence in Tobias. He never would take against his will, he would never force him ...
Reid imagined what would happen if he agreed to surrender: lewd fondling and the bid was talking about the ultimate Bible ...
Penetration ...
The word exploded in his skull against a bomb.
Reid was not prepared to endure the violent possession of the body, that sensation invasive, physical pain, neglect, psychological distress ... and, above all, the abominable sin of religion.
Spencer was looking desperately for a way to put an end to this situation.
Flee? It was impossible. He was drugged, shackled by handcuffs and locked up. And it's been that he did even more upright.
Suicide? There was nothing in that infamous shack lost in the middle of nowhere, to end his days ... Anyway, he had no physical force. And Reid, even in the midst of this despair, without hope, would not commit that sin.
It was the thank you Tobias. At its full thank you. In life as in death. He had to wait to fall under the onslaught of violence, or succumb to a fatal injection.
Maybe his body gaunt and skeletal soon render the soul under a rain of lashes or punches...? Maybe his heart, weakened by the Dilaudid, finally let go?
His spirit was broken, his nerves severed, and psychologically, it was a wreck, defeated. So why his body he continued to resist? Why is a breath of life passed through his lungs yet?
How long, again, to endure all this? Months? Perhaps the years? Reid thought of all that he had already experienced everything that could now happen to him...
A ball at the back of the throat, stomach knotted, Reid wanted to scream, scream his rage and despair. Even cry would have probably done well. But he could not. He had no strength. He could not do anything... otherwise suffer .
And it would suffer.
He would suffer all... until the end.
Since God wanted him to drink the chalice to the drugs...
Thinking back to the Bible, suddenly, Reid felt as calm.
The Lord's words...
Leviticus, chapter 20, verse 13...
He saw, finally, an exit door.
A thank you from Tobias... in life and in death... in death and in love ...
Charles, speaking through the voice of his son, had told him: "If you attempt even my son, I'll kill you..."
Half of the personality of Tobias wanted to, the other half, one by which he was living his father was ready to kill him.
Charles intends to apply the word of the Lord, even the most extreme... especially the more extreme.
That said Leviticus, chapter 20, verse 13?... they will be put to death, their blood be upon them .
Tobias certainly could not endure the conflict between his desires invert one side and the other religious commandments that he had taught his father. Her mind split in two was going to explode.
Reid thought that his only chance lay in this schizophrenia.
The temptation of the flesh ...
Early death in the great, there was only one step... one step away... No more suffering, more moves, more drugs ...
In the arms of Tobias, in submitting his body to his, the drop carnal and sensual, it would all be over.
Finally finished.
A follow...