Broken and Bound

Chapter 3

I don't own Harry Potter. I don't want to own Harry Potter either. Now Severus Snape (Alan Rickman) I wouldn't mind owning him, but sadly I don't own him either. I do however own other soon to be known Characters. I also own the plot of the story. I adopted this fic from SpikesWoman77, and I hope to do her some justice. I posted this fic on my web groups. If you would like to check out the groups go to my profile.

Summary—This is an abused Harry bonds with Snape fic. Death Eaters, tortured and raped kidnap Harry. Severus happens upon him and alerts the Order. Harry is brought back to headquarters where he has to face what he's gone through while dealing with the death of Sirius.

Dumbledore is his usual meddling self and finds a way to "help" his two most important "friends". Features a slightly OOC Snape and dark Lupin. This will be HP-SS slash. I hope it's original enough for you all and I hope you enjoy. And don't forget to review!

Warning—this chapter contains mentions of Rape and Torture though I will not be describing much of it. Be warned! I would like to thank everyone who has reviewed so far. I would also like to suggest if you like Flaming then light a match. No one is perfect so please be nice constructive criticism is one thing but to be rude is not.

Thanks,
Serena (Rena)

Harry spent the better part of the next two days in and out of consciousness. Dumbledore had not returned to headquarters, leaving Harry in the care of Molly Weasley and Remus Lupin.

Harry ate like an obedient child when he was fed, he washed and dressed for the day and answered the questions he was asked with a shallow grin. But he was far from being okay. He was sinking deep into a pit of despair and he wasn't sure anyone could bring him out of it.

Molly had Harry in the kitchen for the second evening he was awake. She was cooking up a big pot of beef stew while talking with Harry.

"I have to go back to the Burrow dear," she said in a kind, apologetic tone. "I hate to leave you and I'd love to take you with me but Dumbledore says it's not safe right now."

Harry gave a light shrug. "I understand. I'm fine here, really. I mean, Remus is here with me and I won't be alone or anything."

She gave him a small smile. "Well, if you need anything, we're just a firecall away, you know that. And Professor Snape is going to be by sometime tonight to recheck your wounds."

Harry shifted uncomfortably. "Mrs. Weasley, my wounds are fine now. Really, I'm not in any more pain."

"I'm happy to hear that Harry," she said in a pacifying tone, "but I'm sure Severus will want to make sure for himself. He's a rather thorough man."

Harry smiled a little. "Yeah, I guess he is." He waited for her to ladle out a bowl of stew and he began to eat promptly.

"I'm glad to see you've got your appetite back dear," she said absently as she used her wand to clear up the mess. Clapping her hands together, she turned to him and beamed. "I have to be off, but I'll be back day after tomorrow."

Harry smiled. "Tell Ron hullo for me please," he said politely. "Tell him I'll write just as soon as Dumbledore gives me the go ahead."

"I will," she promised. "I expect he'll be frantic for news of you as all the owls he sent have been returned."

Harry laughed. "I can imagine."

She moved to the kitchen doorway and smiled at him. "Good by dear. See you in a few days."

Harry gave her a small wave and watched her walk away. He waited until he heard the whoosh of the flames before pushing his half eaten bowl away from him. Harry stared down at his hands and bit down on his lip. Blood. There was so much blood on his hands he couldn't even remember what colour his skin used to be.

Harry stood up from the table and made for the door when he ran into Remus. "Sorry," he said meekly. He could practically feel the animosity in the air whenever he and Remus were in the same room.

Remus gave him a half-hearted smile. "It's okay. Where are you going?"

"Upstairs," he answered softly. "Unless you'd like my company while you ate."

Remus looked like he was about to sneer but he smiled a little tensely instead. "No, you look like you need the rest. I'll call for you if I need anything."

Harry nodded and sighed softly before making his way back up the staircase and into the room he was staying at. He looked down the hall before entering his bedroom, towards the door where Sirius had kept Buckbeak. Harry vaguely wondered where the Hippogriff had gone but it was a fleeting thought.

He walked back into the room and looked over at the two potion bottles that were left. He knew they would be dangerous if taken in large quantities but the miniscule amount he had wouldn't do anything but make him sleep maybe puke at best.

"What am I thinking?" he muttered aloud. "Suicide?"

But now that he said it aloud, it didn't sound so bad. He could rid himself of this world and join his parents…join Sirius. Nothing else would matter if he could get to them again, would it? But the potions weren't enough. He'd have to be cleverer about it.

Looking down at his hands again, he sighed. "So much blood," he muttered. "Maybe I'll be able to think more clearly if I have a kip." Nodding to himself, he buried his face into the pillow and let sleep swallow him.

8888

Harry woke a few hours later crying bitterly. He had forgotten to take the dreamless sleeping potion and he had dreamt of Sirius dying again. Only this time the Dursley's had accompanied him. Their bodies had been covered in blood as they marched through the veil after Sirius. Harry had cried out to them but they didn't turn his way once. When he looked down, he saw their blood dripping off of his fingers, pooling down on the cool stone floor…

Harry rubbed the sleep from his eyes and sat up. His muscles were still quite sore from his little adventure in the Malfoy dungeon…but that was all going to end. He had figured out the way to end it. He would rid himself of the blood tainting him.

Making his way to the bathroom, Harry found what he was searching for. An old fashioned straight razor and to his delight, it was still sharp. Taking a deep breath, he drew it down one arm from the wrist to the elbow. He gasped as it cut the skin but more out of surprise. It didn't hurt much at all! Harry drew the blade down his other arm, a little deeper than before and placed the blade in the sink.

He watched with mild interest as the blood began to pool at his feet. Just like in the dream, he mused. Only this way is more proper. Now it's my blood, no one else's.

"Harry," came a voice, jarring him from his thoughts. It was Remus and he was standing outside the bathroom door.

"Are you in there?" His tone was weary and irritated.

"Er…" Harry said softly. "I'll just be a minute." He was at a loss. He just wanted to go in peace but if Remus found him like this, he might try and save him. Then again, he might not. It was clear that Remus hated him right then. Blamed him for killing Sirius, and rightly so. It was Harry's fault…wasn't it?

"I'm coming in," Remus said slowly. "Are you decent?"

"No," Harry called back. "Er…I'm in the bath."

"I didn't hear you run the bath," he said uneasily.

"I er…" he said; now lost for an excuse. "I'm just getting ready to right now." Harry was starting to feel dizzy and he slumped against the wall. His knees gave way and he slid down to the ground, the backs of his pajama pants falling into the sticky blood that had covered a spot on the floor.

"Alohamora," came Remus' voice. The lock clicked open and the werewolf marched in, his amber eyes blazing. "What the hell," he hissed as he saw what Harry had done.

Harry looked up at him, his green eyes clouded and lost. "I'm sorry for what I did Remus," he said brokenly. "I killed Sirius and Cedric and the Dursley's. I just…I can't do it anymore."

Remus looked absolutely livid. "Harry James Potter…I can not believe you're doing this! Think of all the people that love you, that are depending on you to stop Voldemort! And you think you can just take the easy way out! You think it's going to all go away? Your parents and Sirius would be disgusted with you right now! Isn't it enough that you went and got them killed simply for being born? Now you're going to take away the hope of the wizarding world just because you can't fucking deal with loss? Well grow up Potter! I reckon Snape was right about you all along! You are a good for nothing! If I knew it was going to come down to this…I would've just let you die in that dungeon like I wanted to!" He lowered his voice and drew his face very close to Harry. "If you think your parents or Sirius will be waiting for you with open arms in the after life, you're wrong. They'll be waiting to see you chucked into the pits of hell for what you've done…"

Remus meant to say more when a hand suddenly came out of nowhere and pinned him by the neck to the wall. A black hair, black-cloaked figure soon followed. It was Snape.

He was a mere centimeter from Remus' face and his eyes were blazing with fury. "Tell me I did not hear what I thought I just heard," he hissed in a dangerously low voice.

Remus glared defiantly back. "You heard correctly Snape."

"How dare you," he said slowly. "How dare you blame Harry for Sirius' rash decision? How dare you blame Harry for what the Dark Lord did to his parents! It's no one's fault but Voldemort that Lily and James died. It's no one's fault except maybe Sirius's and a little bit my fault that the stupid mutt went off after Harry even though Dumbledore told him to stay put!"

Snape released the werewolf and watched as he stormed out of the bathroom. Harry, by this time, had lost quite a bit of blood. He was white as a sheet and his breath was uneven. He was half-conscious and could barely make out the figure of his Potion's master looming over him.

Severus pointed his wand at Harry's wounds and with the whisper of a spell they closed. Snape gathered the broken teen to his chest and carried him to his bed. He pulled a few vials of potion out of his robes and forced one down Harry's throat. He waited a minute to make sure it would be taking effect before he walked out of the room.

Just before Harry lost consciousness, a thought occurred to him. Snape had called him Harry…and he called Voldemort by his name.

8888

Severus stormed downstairs and put a pinch of powder into the fireplace. "ALBUS DUMBLEDORE!" he called roughly. It took a moment, but soon the whirling figure of the Headmaster appeared and stepped out of the grate.

"Severus." He said softly taking a seat in a nearby chair. "Something wrong?"

Severus was livid as he told Albus exactly what had transpired. He told the old man how he'd shown up to speak with Harry when he heard Remus pounding on the bathroom door, asking for Harry. "I'd kept to the shadows so he wouldn't see me. I've suspected that werewolf for some time Albus, you know that. Well tonight he confirmed my suspicions." In one breath Severus told Dumbledore exactly what he'd seen…Harry standing in the bathroom with his wrists slit. Then he told Dumbledore word for word what Lupin had said to the boy.

Albus' eyes had lost their twinkle as he sat silently in the chair. Finally, he sighed and stood up. "I'll have to speak with Remus." He started towards the stairs with Severus close at his heels. "Perhaps a stay at St. Mungos will sort him out," he mused aloud.

Severus snorted. "He needs a good thrashing…and I'd be happy to oblige."

Albus smiled just a little. "No Severus, the man is in pain."

"But he's blaming a teenager Albus! A teenager who reacted to what he thought was his godfather being tortured! If anyone is to blame, it's me! Me, for not letting Potter know that I understood and made sure Black was safe. Everyone seems to be so blinded by how much Potter looks like his father! They just assumed Harry was acting arrogantly and irrationally."

"Including you, Severus?" Albus asked softly, coming to a stop on the landing.

Severus nodded, his eyes blazing. "Including me. But I know for a fact that Harry, though he has a bloody hero complex, isn't as stupid and thick as his father or godfather were."

Albus smiled just a little. "I appreciate you saying that Severus. Now I must ask another favor of you."

Severus bit back a groan of frustration. "Yes?" he asked tensely.

"I will have to remove Remus from this place immediately and I need someone to stay with Harry until I can get Molly or perhaps Tonks to look after him."

"Albus, I have other obligations, you know this. Draco…"

Dumbledore held up his hand. "It should not be more than a few hours and knowing young Mr. Malfoy, I'm sure he will be okay for a few hours."

Severus sighed, mostly cos the old man was right. "Fine," he agreed tensely. "But it can not be longer than three hours. Draco is in a bad way Albus, and I don't want him to be alone much longer than that."

"Thank you," he said softly.

"Are you going to inform the rest of the Order about the…incident?"

Dumbledore sighed and nodded. "They have to know and I know most of them will want to help Remus get better."

"Help Remus," Severus asked, his eyebrows raised. "What about Potter? What about the fact that he was kidnapped, raped and tortured and then encouraged in his suicide attempt by the best friend of his now dead family?"

"Well that's what you're here for," the old man replied. He swiftly walked over to Remus' room and placed his hand on the handle. "See you Severus."

That infuriated the Potions' Master beyond words but there was nothing to be said as he watched the old man disappear into the room.

Severus let out a growl of frustration and rubbed a hand over his face. "Brilliant," he said sarcastically. He knew he ought to do something for Harry. The teen was most likely waking up from the potion he'd given him and he'd probably need his wounds tended. The charm had sealed the skin but there would be scars and they would probably hurt.

As Severus approached Harry's room, he wished he were back in his manor tending to Draco. At least the Slytherin didn't need coddling. In fact, the blonde hadn't spoken more than a handful of complete sentences since Severus' had brought him home.

Shaking his head, he pulled himself out of his thoughts and walked into the room. Just as he predicted, Harry had begun to stir slightly. He cracked open his eyes and blinked a few times at Snape.

"Are you in pain?" he asked the teen softly.

Harry shrugged. "Nothing I can't live with," he croaked out sitting up gingerly.

Severus sighed and used his wand to conjure up a glass of water. He picked it up and brought it to the teen's mouth that took a grateful swallow.

"Er…thanks," he said shyly.

Severus nodded curtly and set the glass on the counter. "Give me your wrists," he commanded.

"They don't hurt anymore," Harry defended keeping his hands firmly in his lap.

"Yes they do," Severus argued. "I know first hand how much it hurts and I have something that will take away the pain." He waved his wand and with a POP, a small jar of cream appeared on the nightstand.

Harry blushed and looked down. "I don't want the pain to go away," he mumbled softly.

"Sorry?"

Harry looked up, his green eyes blazing with determination. "Remus was right, you know. I acted stupidly and my parents hate me for it."

Severus felt the anger rise in him again. "Potter, don't be daft. Yes, you did act stupidly, but you also acted like a teenager who has experienced things that no teenager should ever experience in such a short time! And your parents can't hate you because they are dead. It's as simple as that. If there is someway for them to be watching you right now…I'm sure they would understand. That bloody werewolf was wrong Harry…and you need to see that."

"But…but…It's my fault!" Harry cried brokenly, his eyes shining with unshed tears. "My parents…Diggory…Sirius, and now the Dursley's. I've got their blood on my hands!"

Severus shook his head. "No Harry, their blood is on Voldemort's hands. And he loves that, he reveilles in it!"

Harry took in a shuddering breath and finally presented his wrists to Severus. The Potion's Master eyed the scars that trailed from the palms of his hands up towards his elbows. The teen had certainly wanted to do a thorough job, he mused inwardly.

Severus uncapped the jar of cream and began to rub a small amount onto Harry's arms. He smirked as he heard the raven-haired teen let out a small sigh of relief when the cream began to take effect.

"What now sir?" Harry asked after he'd gotten his arms back. "Is Lupin still here? Is he going to be okay?"

Severus saw genuine concern in the emerald orbs and he was rather surprised that the teen could still care so deeply for the man who nearly killed him. "Dumbledore is going to handle him. He will not be staying here Mr. Potter. I will be here until Dumbledore can make other arrangements."

Harry sighed. He bit his lip and looked torn, as if he were unsure about something. Severus caught his eye and raised his eyebrow in wonder. "I er…" Harry said slowly. "I was wondering if Draco…if he's okay."

"Indeed?" Severus said, not bothering to hide the shock in his voice.

"I erm…I heard him say sorry. I know it wasn't his fault and even though Draco is capable of making his own choices…I know sometimes we have to do things…things that are hard to live with afterwards."

Severus was absolutely gobsmacked. Whatever he expected Harry to say about Draco, well that certainly wasn't it. He was unsure how to broach the subject, but he knew it had to be handled with care. "Po-Harry," he said trying to keep his voice even. "Draco is at my manor. I took him before the Aurors could find him. They never knew he was there."

"But the Order knows," Harry pointed out.

"The Order knows because I was at Malfoy Manor and happened to…" he swallowed back bile that had risen in his throat at the memory. "Witness the act Draco was forced into."

Harry nodded his expression even and cool. "That's how they found me. Because you saw me there."

Severus nodded. "Harry, I do not wish you to think I enjoyed what I saw. If it had been possible for me to get you out of there, believe me, I would have."

Harry waved it away. "Sir, I understand. You have a place in this war and that place is as a spy. You knew the Order could rescue me so why compromise your position when you didn't have to?"

Severus steeped his fingers and pressed the tips to his forehead. The boy was absolutely full of surprises. But Severus wondered if this wasn't a cover to hide from his true feelings. You just didn't survive a rape/torture session and come out all roses and daisies. Not to mention all of what he's just gone through with Lupin.

"I know what you're thinking," Harry said softly. "I know you think that I'm just trying to tell you what you want to hear. But I've realized something. This is a real war. It's not some joke, some fantasy where we know everything's going to turn out all right. And it was stupid of me to try and take my life. I know that Lupin was right about one thing, my parents would have been disappointed."

Severus sighed, staring at the intense green eyes of the teen who had been forced to grow up far too fast. "Perhaps," he answered after a moment. "But it's only human Harry. We disappoint our parents and those we love but we can atone for those mistakes."

Harry nodded slowly. "What now, sir? I have to kill Voldemort but I don't know how. I have to graduate school and of course everyone expects me to become an Auror. I mean, if I survive this war, which I'm not sure I want to, I'll be expected to marry and have babies. That won't happen, I can tell you that for sure." He gave a small, bitter laugh.

Severus quirked an eyebrow. "Why would that be Mr. Potter?"

"Besides the fact that unless I married a muggle, I couldn't be sure if they loved me for my scar or not and…well…I don't fancy women at all."

Severus smiled a little. "How does that matter? Surely you know that male wizards can conceive?"

Harry's mouth fell. "They can?"

Severus nodded. "You still have quite a bit to learn about our world."

"So it seems," Harry mused with his first real smile in a long time.

Severus couldn't repress a very small chuckle. "Are you hungry Harry?"

The teen sighed. "Not really. I think I just need to sleep a little more."

Severus nodded and uncorked a sleeping potion. "Here, drink that and it'll keep you out for a good couple of hours. You're going to have to start weaning yourself off, however. I don't want you to become addicted."

Harry raised the vial to his lips but paused. "May I ask you a direct question?"

Severus nodded. "Though I will not guarantee an answer."

"You're being kind to me. You used to hate me, loathe me…especially when I looking into your pensive and saw the horrid things my father and Sirius did to you. Why are you caring right now?"

Severus took a deep breath. "Because Harry…if anything, I can understand some of the pain you're going through and…as much as I hated James Potter…you aren't him."

Harry grinned. "Took you long enough to figure out, didn't it?" he teased.

Severus scowled at him. "Just because I have confessed something of that nature does not give you the liberty to tease me."

Harry blushed. "Sorry sir." He drank the potion and laid his head down. "Thanks for the help."

Severus nodded. "I probably won't be here when you wake, but I'll be back soon enough to check on your progress."

Harry mumbled something incoherently as he drifted off into a deep sleep.

As much as he was loath to admit it…Harry Potter, the bane of his existence, was now becoming something he cared about…even if it was a miniscule amount. Severus made sure the teen was fast asleep before pulling up the sleeves of his robes and stared down at the harsh white scars that marred his skin. There were several on each arm, signaling his many attempts to end his life, both before he took the mark and after. There was a particularly vicious one that was thick but short. That was the one that landed him in St. Mungo's for six months on suicide watch. That was the one he had done when his mother died, leaving him at the hands of his father. It was six months before he took the Dark Mark.

Severus replaced the sleeves and left the boy to sleep. He found himself waiting impatiently on the couch in the lounge for Dumbledore to return with someone to watch the teen. It took exactly three hours and twenty minutes for the old man to return, and to Severus' dismay…he was alone.

"Who's coming to watch Harry," Severus demanded immediately.

"Molly can't make it for another two days. She and Arthur have their hands full right now."

Severus shook his head, uncaring what the Weasleys were up to. "I can't stay Albus! I have Draco to look after and I can't be occupied with both teens."

Dumbledore sighed. "It's not safe for me to be here with Harry for extended periods. Both he and Voldemort are aware of the link between them and Voldemort knows he can't use it much anymore. However, if he knows that I'm here with Harry…he may try to use it again."

"And if I'm seen here…or at the Manor with Harry and Draco in my possession…" Severus trailed off. The old man knew what he was implying.

"I understand," Dumbledore said softly. "Which is why I have decided to have Harry placed in St. Mungo's for a period of time before term begins."

Severus' eyes widened. He knew full well the effects that place could have on a person. It was supposed to have helped him but it succeeded in making him worse, far more jaded and bitter than he had been before.

"No," he said. "Surely you remember what that place did to me, Albus. Do you wish your Golden Boy to suffer the same fate?"

"I have the utmost confidence in Harry's abilities to overcome those obstacles. I believe it will make him a stronger person."

Severus shook his head. "Potter is a smart kid, I'll give you that. But speaking from experience, I know that's not the place for him."

Albus sighed. "I must have him kept safe Severus. If you can come up with a better solution, I'd be glad to hear it."

Severus growled in frustration. He knew the only solution was to take Harry with him to the Manor. But he had no idea how the teens would react to each other. Not to mention if Lucius came back and found Harry there. It would be very dangerous. Then again, perhaps he could bring Draco here. He was, after all, related to the Blacks.

"You win you doddering old fool," Severus snapped. "I'll go collect Draco and have him here. But I will not be held responsible for what happens between the two teens should their paths cross and things get heated."

Albus was grinning, his blue eyes twinkling more than ever. "I knew I could count on you my boy. Rest assured that I will not hold you responsible for anything that transpires between Harry and Draco while they are under this roof."

Severus mumbled a string of curse words as he walked to the fireplace. Merlin, he thought angrily, this is going to be the longest month ever.

A/N—okay how is it coming so far? This is going to be a Harry-Severus story but it will take a little while. I'm not sure who I want to pair Draco with…not Ron or actually anyone in Gryffindor or in school…I was thinking one of the twins…hehe, wouldn't that be original and a bit fun? I've always seen George as swinging that way.

Em…I know that Draco and Severus are a bit OOC but I like them this way so they're going to stay that way…of course Severus is going to be still as snarky as ever in school so fear not, you haven't lost the over-grown greasy bat yet.

Thank you everyone that reviewed. I will do personal thanks in the next chapter. I'm going to try and update once a month maybe earlier. Also Check out my site Multi-Fiction you can get the link from my profile.

Rena