Sorry for the long delay computer problems. During this time I seem to have lost my very efficient Beta reader so please excuse all the grammatical errors of which I am sure there are plenty. Hope you enjoy this chapter. I am planning on writing just one more then this story will be complete.

Johnson, Jack and Tom all safely return to the hub. Lois and Alonso were there to greet them, as they enter Jack introduces all the team members while Johnson just nods at everyone then gathers up the equipment and announces she will be busy checking it all back into the weapons storage locker. She always likes to keep hellos and goodbyes short and neat no hubbub. After Jack introduces everyone Lois, who thinks Tom is rather cute, offers to take him on a tour of the facility. Jack agrees to it but asks her to keep it short he wants Tom to rest up in the infirmary tonight. Tomorrow he can see more and then she can show him to his knew flat. Lois agrees then takes Tom gently by the arm and begins telling him all about the hub as they start walking towards a set of steps that leads down to the Lab; soon they disappear from sight. Meanwhile Alonso is hugging Jacks arm tightly once they are alone he pulls Jacks arm hard leading him up the stairs to his office then down to their room underneath.

He hugs him tightly. "I am so glad you are finally back I really missed you. Did everything go well?"

Jack tells him about the rescue leaving out the part about being filled full of holes. Al always reacts so negative to those types of things. Jack couldn't blame him he wasn't that fond of those situations either.

Alonso after listening intently to Jack story suddenly leaps up and faces him. "I almost forgot Mickey called and said he made you an appointment for tomorrow afternoon." He pulls a piece of folded paper from his pocket and hands it to Jack who unfolds the paper and begins reading it. As he reads it his body becomes tense. He stops looks away then he reads it a second time as if reading it twice would somehow change what it said. His face goes ashen as he crumples it up and throws it across the room. Al can see the change in him and with great concern in his voice asks him what is wrong. Jack sits quietly for a few moments before he regains his composure and finally speaks.

"Martha must have put him up to it. Mickey knows I would kill him if he tried something like this. They have set up a meeting with Gwen and Rhys. I am to go to this café and talk with them both." He put his forehead in the palm of his hand and starts rubbing it. "I am not ready for this Al, Martha seems to think it will be a wonderful reunion and everything will be fine but that's not how it's going to be. I know Gwen and I know how she will react. I am a little surprised she even agreed to this." He puts his face in both palms and begins rubbing his temples as a pulsing headache attacks him. Alonso pulls one hand away holding it to his chest as he stares into Jacks eyes. Those eyes; so dark, mysterious, beautiful, and loving, you look into them and it's like losing yourself in the twinkling stars of the universe.

"Jack please don't worry. Just go and meet with her. It will be fine, if things happen to go wrong it will be just like removing a sticky plaster, you just pull it off quickly, it will hurt for a second then it will be all over with. You will survive it you always do."

Then the realization hits Jack, this isn't news to Alonso he knew about all this, probably even helped arrange it. Jacks rage builds as he begins yelling at Al. "Wait you knew about this didn't you. You helped arrange all this, sitting there so innocent acting, how could you do this to me when you knew how I felt about it." Jack pushes Alonso away and stands to stare out at the water. "Why would you deliberately hurt me like that? I am just not ready to face her."

Al walks over to him, "I am sorry Jack I was only trying to help." Alonso touches his arm but he pulls away. He starts to cry as Jack just stands there arms folded firmly across his chest saying nothing.

Still enraging, "Why is it that everyone else thinks they know what's best for me, I believe I know what's best for me and what's best for me is NOT facing Gwen tomorrow or ever!" He slams his fists against the wall pressing his head against the glass.

Alonso is beginning to wonder if it was the right thing to do. He swallows hard then wipes away the tears now stinging his cheeks. He breathes in deeply then approaches Jack once again. "You mean the man who takes on Daleks, Weevils, even Abadon is afraid of one little woman?"

Jack yells emphatically, "YES! I would rather face a weevil than her any day." He turns and looks at Al, his eyes now reddened. His heart sinks as he just stands there staring. Then he looks back out at the dark water. He feels betrayed. There is an uncomfortable silence between them when suddenly Jack relaxes and starts to laugh. He was thinking about what he said, that he'd rather face a Weevil Gwen really wasn't all that bad. As he turns towards a very confused looking Al, Jack smiles and hugs him. "I know what you are trying to do." Jack uses his thumbs to remove the last of the tears from AL's cheeks. "You just want to help me get over this one last obstacle. I will do it for you. I will go tomorrow but I won't like it." He knows he can't keep putting this off he has no fight left in him anymore. He moves in closer to Al holding him tightly he kisses him and lets him know he is forgiven. Al is relieved he worries and him so much he savors the kiss then puts his head on Jacks chest. They say nothing for a few minutes then Jack suggests they should prepare for bed so they can get a good night's sleep; they undress then climb into bed snuggling in close to each other. Not long after they fall asleep Jacks nightmare begins.

It strikes without warning, breaking into his sleep, his body reacting violently from the onslaught. He tries to defend himself; pushing them away, building barriers, but to no avail, the walls fall and they rush in. Gwen stands before him anger and disappointment showing on her face. She wants to know why he would choose to run away. Her anger grows. He tries to make her understand, how the grief was so overwhelming he couldn't take it anymore that he had to go but she accuses him of leaving not because of grief, but from shame. It was his mistakes that led to the deaths of those so close to him. It was his fault Ianto and Steven were dead; doesn't matter that he saved all the other children, doesn't matter that he saved the world and had to sacrifice so much. If he had just taken the time to listen and not gone storming in, then things would have been different. They would still be alive. Gwen's eye's staring at him showing the hate and discontent she feels for him; those same eyes boring into his soul and ripping it to shreds. He pleads with her to forgive him only to be chastised for being such a coward. He feels something tugging at his mind, no wait it is at his arm, shaking him pulling him back to reality. Jack shoots up from the bed taking on a defensive posture. His body drenched with sweat, beads still streaming down his face; his eyes trying to focus on the figure before him. Alonso is standing at the edge of the bed trembling with fright, not knowing what to do or how he can help his distressing lover. The bed is a shambles; pillows in the floor, sheets and covers in a tangled mass in the center of the bed. Jacks heart is beating rapidly, there is a pounding in his ears, his lungs begging for air, he feels faint as if he could black out at any moment, then he finally takes a deep breath gulping at the air and his body begins to relax.

"Are you alright?" Alonso wishes he hadn't asked that question he feels a little embarrassed by asking something so obvious. "Of course you are not alright. You look terrible. Here sit down by me", He sits then pats the bed next to him. "Tell me all about it; I am sure it will help you to talk about it."

Jack slides over next to him using his arm to wipe away the sweat, that is mixing with the flowing tears, "It was just a nightmare, I suppose I am nervous about tomorrow, that's all, I will be fine."

His voice still so shaky he couldn't even convince himself he was alight but Al doesn't push him instead he just comforts him. He holds him kissing the tears away. He whispers to him, "Why don't you go and take a nice hot shower it will help you to relax. In the meantime and I will go up and make us both a cup of coffee. Then we can talk."

Jacks mind still a bit scrambled begins a conversation with him. Coffee, yes coffee; Ianto knew exactly when I needed a good cup of coffee, but wait this isn't Ianto he is dead this is Alonso but that's okay because I love him too and he loves me as well. It's fine if Alonso makes me a cup of coffee even if it isn't as good as Ianto's but no matter it's still made with just as much love and right now I can use love more than anything. His mind still jumbled when he finally answers after a long pause as if he woke up a second time "That would be great. I will get cleaned up and meet you in the kitchen, well that is unless you care to join me in the shower." He flashes that irresistible smile at Alonso.

"You know I have no defense against that don't you?"

"Oh yes I know." His smile broadens.

"Alright but only to make you feel better."

"I feel much better already."

After enjoying some very pleasant moments in the shower Al steps out and starts drying off. He puts on a robe and looks back into to the shower. "You finish up and I will go get the coffee started.

"That sounds terrific", he pauses," and, Al, thanks."

"Thanks for what?"

"For understanding." Jack leans out and kisses him.

After he finishes he dresses and joins Al in the kitchen. They sip coffee as and talk for hours about anything and everything except the nightmare. As the time passes the others begin coming in to work. Lois brings in Tom from the infirmary and Al fixes everyone breakfast. Johnson stomps in looks at everyone sitting and eating then stomps out mumbling something about needing to schedule more training. They all look at each other and laugh. Lois then offers to take Tom to his new flat. Jack suggests Alonso go with them, He objects at first but Jack talks him into it. Everyone leaves except Jack who is grateful for the peace and quiet as he prepares himself to meet with Gwen. He knows this is the right thing to do, he'd just rather be shot in the head than do it. As he finishes dressing then looks around the place one last time, as if he may not be returning. Things are so different now, so many changes; new hub, new team, new lover, everything seems to be going his way for a change and that's what scares him.

Well love it hate it wanna use it to line the bird cage? Any response would be great!