Against his assumptions, Fenris had fit in quickly with his newly found companions. He had more or less ended up replacing the guard woman, Aveline on their little outings, to Hawkes clear relief. There had been no actual ill will between the women, but Avelines noble views had often been at odds with Hawkes more opportunistic ones. That and Aveline had been busy enough with her actual duties, more so after they had ruffled some feathers high enough to land her an impending promotion to be the captain of the guard. It hadn't actually lessened her workload. For that reason maybe among others, Aveline hadn't seemed to mind all that much for being left out from Hawkes occasionally rather questionable money raising schemes.
The actual money raising had taken somewhat longer than the couple weeks Hawke had originally intended, though she'd got all the time she wanted to take. It had turned out that apart from monetary support, Bartrand had been sorely missing something else to launch the expedition, something the dwarf of her group, Varric had conveniently arranged for Hawke to find thus making her irreplaceable. That had been the maps to actually get anywhere near the area they were intended to explore. That had also been how they had first found Anders, an apostate and as it had soon turned out, an abomination as well, even if he'd claimed to be settled by a benevolent spirit and not a malevolent one.
Fenris had hated him since they had first met. He hated all mages of course and Danarius in particular with a deep seethed rage, but there had been something in Anders person as well that he couldn't stand. Fenris likely would have hated him even if he hadn't been a mage. Hawke hadn't shared his distrust though, probably because she had grown up in apostate family. Being a healer of some merit, Anders had had a clinic in the undercity for those who could not afford, or otherwise were reluctant to use the chantry sanctioned healers. How he had pulled that in a city swarmed with templars had been everyone's guess. Being also a former Grey Warden he'd got an intimate knowledge of the Deeproads and some maps he'd been ready to exchange to a favor.
Hawke had agreed to help of course, and after the messy deal the mission had turned out to be Anders had offered his continued help, much like Fenris had done only some days earlier. To Fenris's annoyance, Hawke had been glad to accept the offered help as that way Bethany, her sister, was not so essential for the well being of the group and afterward had often stayed home looking after their mother. At first Fenris had considered of refusing to work with the abomination but after some thought stayed with them anyway. Protecting Hawke, as well from threats within the group as otherwise, had just seemed natural place to be. Fenris had reasoned it was because that was what he was best at. At least this time he had chosen the person he protects himself.
-o-
Fenris pushed the memories back in his mind. He didn't actually want to remind himself of Anders. He was angry that Hawke had chosen that person over himself, even if she had reasoned it with Anders's knowledge of the Deeproads. And Anders even wouldn't have wanted to go there anymore, although he had agreed when Hawke had asked, while Fenris instead would have wanted to follow her anywhere she'd take him, but was left behind. Was he really so taken with the human? Isabela had suggested he was jealous some days after the expedition had left and he had been drowning his bad mood in the Hanged Man. He had profusely disagreed then, stating that for being jealous, he would have had needed some preference towards Hawke in the first place. Fenris hoped there would be some unrest at the gate soon for him to bury these thoughts and let the throbbing lyrium run free.
Another shorter one and I still had trouble to get it down. Too much things to tell but however I turn it the puzzle pieces don't seem to fit..