A/N- I thought of this after watching 'Luke can see her face'
Description: What if Jess had stayed after Liz's wedding. How will things change with Jess now living in Stars Hollow again?
Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls or the characters associated with the show.
A Different View on Reality
Chapter Two: Book Buyers Anonymous
It was late Friday afternoon, almost a week after the wedding and since Jess had moved back to the town, it was safe to say that nobody in the town was pleased to have him back, and all eyed him suspiciously.
The sun was shining down warmly as Rory got out of her car, pulling a large book bag behind her; she locked her car door and walked into her house, dropping her bag in the hall.
'Mom?' Rory called out, to figure out if her mom was in the house. There was no answer at first so Rory went into her bedroom and changed from her scruffy jeans and grey sweatshirt and pulled on a knee length cream dress with a pale blue sash round her waist, she brushed her hair and applied a thin coat of clear lip gloss before going into the kitchen to make some coffee. A minute later Lorelai walked in through the back door, yelling as she did.
'I know Babette, it'll all be ready by tomorrow I promise, I know! Bye Babette.' With a sigh Lorelai closed the door and turned around, jumping as she spotted her daughter sat at the table, with a mug of coffee in her hand.
'Jeez, you know how to scare mommy, did I know you were coming?' Lorelai asked.
'Nope, Paris was driving me crazy so I couldn't study and since I was done with classes this afternoon I drove here today to extend the weekend and hopefully get some peace to study.' Rory replied.
'Oh sorry sweets, you came to the wrong place for peace, it's the towns first ever town square carnival and movie re-enactment, one of Taylor's schemes. See there's going to be a carnival with all these different booths selling things, and games to play and then the big finale, there's going to be a re-enactment of; wait for it; Finding Nemo! Because Taylor deemed it appropriate for all ages.' Lorelai smiled, pouring herself some of the coffee Rory had made.
'Ok, sounds just crazy enough to be fun, but what does that have to do with me studying?' Rory asked.
'I'm making costumes, I've got people coming in all evening for fittings, and I have been put in charge of a booth selling candy and before you say it, I warned Taylor that I'd be more likely to eat more than I sell, and Luke warned him but alas he said he needed someone and I was the last option. So I will also be making signs and things to make my booth pretty, oh and Lane and the band are rehearsing in the garage this evening because they will be playing at the festival, and Sookie will be in and out because she's catering the buffet and running a baked goods booth, so she needed more space to work and since her kitchen wasn't big enough and the inn is being used for, well feeding the guests, she'll be using ours as well as hers and running between the two.' Lorelai rambled.
'Wow, sounds like you have a busy evening. I can help later but I need to get some of this studying done first.' Rory replied.
'That's fine, sorry you can't study here though, where will you go?' Lorelai asked.
'Not sure, bookstore maybe.' Rory said standing up and grabbing her book bag.
'Oh the bookstore.' Lorelai nodded uncertainty in her voice. 'By the way, you look especially pretty today; did you drive back in that?'
'No, I changed when I got here.' Rory answered, 'Ok so I'm going to head out, I'll see you later.'
'Ok, see you later.' Lorelai called.
Rory walked through the streets and made her way to one of her favourite places in the town, the bookstore, as she approached she was Jess standing behind the counter, she smiled slightly, pleased he'd got the job, and pushed open the door.
'Hey.' Jess greeted her slightly nervously.
'Hey, so you got the job.'
'Yeah, don't know what Andrew was thinking, but I got it.' Jess shrugged.
'I'm glad, so are you here on your own today?' Rory questioned.
'Yup, I'm very trusted.' Jess smirked.
'In that case I have a favour to ask you, my house is a dressing room, second kitchen and band rehearsal space so I need somewhere quiet to study. I was thinking I could set up in a quiet corner; I'll sit on the floor in the education section, that's the quietest section, especially since everyone is so busy with the festival that it'll probably be quiet in here anyway.' Rory rambled.
'Rory, calm down you don't need to convince me, set up wherever you like.' Jess smirked.
'Thanks.' Rory smiled going over to the corner of the shop, between two stands of books, out of the way of everyone else's view. She sat down with her back against the wall and laid her books out around her on the floor.
Two hours later as the sun started setting Rory was interrupted by Jess coming over.
'Hey, could you keep an eye on the place for a few minutes, I need to run out.' Jess said leaning against the shelf.
'Sure, though I don't think one person has come in all day besides me.' Rory laughed.
'True, I'll be right back.' Jess replied turning and leaving the shop. Rory rested her head against the wall and sighed, closing her eyes. One minute she was mad at him and the next she couldn't stop smiling, and she wanted to hang out with him. Her mind was in chaos.
A few minutes later as promised Jess returned, coming back over to where Rory sat he held out a bag from Luke's and a cup of coffee.
'Figured you could use some dinner.' Jess shrugged.
'Thanks! You want to join me?' Rory asked. 'I could use a break.'
'Sure.' Jess sat down next to her and took his own food out of the bag. 'I'm closing the store in ten minutes, I saw Andrew in the square and he said there really isn't much point staying open.'
'Oh, shall I pack up then?' Rory asked.
'No you can stay for a while; I still need to tidy the place up and a few bits and pieces, including buying the books I put aside that I wanted.' Jess smirked, 'I swear I'm going to spend more than I earn in this place.'
'I know the feeling; we should start up book buyers anonymous.' Rory laughed, taking a bite of her burger.
'The BBA, I like it. We could have weekly meetings.' Jess smirked.
'Ooh and share books to cut down on cost, so we're not buying the same books and paying double what we could be.' Rory agreed.
'Sounds good.' Jess rested his head on the wall, suddenly the atmosphere got tenser, and they both felt it.
'I've missed this.' Rory said sincerely.
'Me too.' Jess nodded his head slowly. 'I've missed you.'
'Yeah well you were the one who left.' Rory snapped back, the anger rising again.
'I know, I've regretted it every day since I left. Can I at least try and explain?' Jess asked.
'I don't know why I should let you; I can't see any explanation being good enough.' Rory crossed her arms over her chest.
'You're probably right, but I'd like to explain.'
'Fine, explain.' Rory said keeping her gaze away from him.
'I was messed up when I left, I wasn't graduating, my father had just shown up after almost 18 years, my life was falling apart around me, the only good thing I had going was you and I didn't deserve you, I was well on the way to messing that up too, and so I ran. It's what I always do when things get tough, a kneejerk reaction to failure. I couldn't let you down; see the disappointment on your face.
I know what I did was wrong, I never should have left, especially without telling you, but in my head I thought I was doing what was best.' Jess tried to explain.
'You could have called.' Rory said, 'Then you wouldn't have seen my face.'
'I did call, a few times, never said anything it was just too hard, as soon as I heard your voice, and then you yelled at me the day of your graduation and I just felt so; broken; that I stopped calling.' Jess replied, Rory felt tears stinging her eyes.
'It hurt, for so long it hurt. You broke my heart Jess.'
'I'm so sorry; if it helps at all I'm pretty sure I broke my own as well.' Jess said honestly.
'So after everything why'd you decide to come back? Wouldn't it have been easier to make a clean break, surely this place isn't the best place to go.' Rory said.
'I came back for you, I always do don't I.' Jess smiled sadly. 'I know there's nothing between us, but maybe someday we can be friends, I hope I haven't lost all hope.'
'I don't know.' Rory replied. 'Maybe.'
'I just want you to know that I'm trying to be better, and that's all down to you, you're perfect and wonderful and you deserve better than what I gave you, I mean you're the most amazing beautiful girl I have ever known, it's no wonder I'm so in love with you.' Jess said, he hadn't meant to say any of it but it slipped out, and he regretted it the minute it was out. Rory stared at him wide eyed, within seconds she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. Jess was shocked but kissed her back. A few seconds later she pulled back quickly, tears falling from her eyes.
'Oh my...I just. I'm sorry.' Rory grabbed her things and got to her feet before Jess could work out what had happened.
'Rory it's ok.' Jess stood up alongside her. Tears were pouring down her face as she pulled her arm away from his hand as he held her lightly.
'No! No it's not ok! You broke my heart and then you just walk back in here and suddenly I'm falling at your feet. I can't be that girl, I'm sorry I shouldn't have kissed you, just pretend it never happened.' Rory said running out of the store and all the way home. Slamming the door behind her she screamed out.
'Stupid! Stupid!' She yelled banging her hands against the door. She turned around and saw Lorelai, Sookie and Lane watching her.
'Honey what happened?' Lorelai asked pulling her daughter into the lounge and sitting her down, Lane and Sookie followed.
'Nothing.' Rory lied, wiping her eyes with her hands.
'Of course, I frequently beat up my door while calling myself stupid and crying.' Lane said unconvincingly.
'I'm just really, really stupid that's all.' Rory said shaking her head.
'Don't tell Yale.' Lorelai joked.
'Mom!'
'Sorry, I just don't know what to say since you won't tell me what happened.' Lorelai rolled her eyes.
'I kissed Jess.' Rory said looking down, the three others looked between one another wide eyed, mouths hanging open.
'Sorry you what?' Lane asked.
'I kissed Jess.' Rory yelled.
'Sweetie, I thought you were just studying.' Sookie said in confusion.
'I was! I went to the bookstore and studied for hours and then he brought me food and coffee, and we were just talking and laughing and then we were talking about everything that happened and he apologised and he was so sweet and then he; well and I; it's just that he's so,'
'Full sentences honey.' Lorelai prompted.
'I was stupid, It never should have happened, I was caught up in the moment and it just happened and I won't let it happen again.' Rory replied. 'I was momentarily crazy.'
'Uh-huh.' Lane nodded.
'It didn't mean anything.' Rory yelled.
'I'm sure it didn't' Lorelai sighed.
'It didn't!' Rory insisted. 'I hate him! He broke my heart, he took it and smashed it into a million pieces, I've never hurt so much, I can't forgive him for that. I hate him.' Rory yelled, jumping up and going to her room, closing the door behind her she fell onto the bed and cried.
A/N – Hope you like it, sorry if Jess is bit OOC. I'd love to hear your thoughts as always so please review.