Title: I Wear A Halo When You Look At Me - Chapter Three
Pairing: Brittana
Rating: PG-13 (I think)
Summary: Santana decides to stay in New York after Nationals to help her get the courage to come out and then she comes out with Brittany right beside her.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or any of the Characters I've used.
Spoilers: None (I think)
Santana arrived outside the Fabray home just after 12 o'clock. She pulled into the driveway, switched off the engine which cut the music she was playing out and pushed her sunglasses onto her face to shield her eyes from the sunlight.
Santana pressed the doorbell and leaned against the wall to her left, waiting to be invited inside.
"Hey." Quinn greeted her, a little awkwardly as she opened the door.
"Hey." Santana replied standing straight up before her and tugging her sunglasses down her nose and folding them in her hand.
"Come in." The blonde haired girl gestured for Santana to enter, stepping aside and then closing the door behind the Latina when she did.
Santana had never liked the way Quinn's house was decorated. It was much too old-fashioned and dull for her but she had met Quinn's parents and it suited them, mainly her father who had left now so Santana didn't really understand why the house hadn't been changed. Quinn led them up the staircase and down the hall towards her bedroom which was the only half-decent looking room in the house, Santana thought.
The girls hadn't really been friends recently, they had grown apart but they felt something spark between them again in New York that made them realize why they had been friends in the first place. They had both changed an awful lot since their earlier days at McKinley High but one thing that hadn't changed and one thing they had in common was that they were both still bitches.
Santana knew that there was a softer side to herself that only ever really came out around Brittany and those very few people she trusted. In New York, the Latina had witnessed a softer, more vulnerable side to Quinn that she could relate to. Quinn had broken down in front of her and Brittany and told them that all she wanted was to be loved. Santana, although she never admitted it, wanted them same but the only person she wanted that love from was Brittany. Now that the Latina knew she had Brittany she felt bad for Quinn who just lost her boyfriend to Rachel Berry, the girl Quinn had despised since first laying eyes on.
"You're room's changed." Santana noted, trailing her fingertips across a large white chair in the corner of Quinn's bedroom.
"Yeah." Quinn nodded. "It's been awhile since you've been here."
An awkward silence fell again. Santana felt uncomfortable because she didn't know where to sit or what to do with herself. She decided to just go for it, much like she had in New York when telling Grace she was gay, it seemed to work quite well so far.
"Are you still angry?" The dark haired girl asked.
Quinn scoffed and shook her head. "I'm less angry than I was but still..."
"You know in New York when you told Britt and I all that stuff?" Santana asked moving closer to the blonde who sat down on the edge of a white desk across from her bed.
"You said that you just wanted someone to love you?" Santana went on when Quinn didn't speak. "This is gross for me to even say, not just about you but about anyone, and I know you didn't mean it in this kinda way but I think I could have loved you. You obviously don't know this but I was jealous of you and I adored you. You were what I wanted to be and because you kind of threw all of that in my face, all that like and admiration I had for you kind of turned into hate."
Quinn didn't know what to say. She didn't want to look Santana in they eye because of what she was saying. Quinn didn't have any idea that Santana admired her and 'adored' her, in fact she thought that Santana was the only person who didn't.
"Wow." Quinn whispered and Santana chuckled.
"You know I'm just gonna get all of this soppy shit out of the way all in one go so you might forget some of it." The darker girl laughed. "I think if a lot of things didn't happen we could be real good friends right now and I know that that's something neither of us really have; good friends."
"You have Brittany." Quinn cut in. "That's something I've always envied about you Santana. No matter how much of a jerk you were you always had someone right by your side willing to put up with it all."
"You could have had her too. I mean, Britt loves everyone, she even still loves you. Just because you and I weren't friends didn't mean you two had to stop being." Santana explained remembering how upset the dancer had been when Quinn had stopped talking to them.
"Yeah." Quinn half laughed, half sighed.
"She missed hanging out with you, Q. I did too." Santana admitted and she saw Quinn hide a small smile.
"You know, I don't know how I never realized about you two." Quinn laughed at herself. She glanced up at Santana who looked like she was about to play dumb and so she continued quickly. "Don't bother, S. I know."
Santana closed her mouth waiting for Quinn to say something else.
"She's always loved you, Santana. You've always had her. No one's ever love me like that, that much."
"That's cause the person you went and fell in love with was Finn." Santana scoffs. "I don't think that giant ass is capable of loving anyone properly. And the Puck got you knocked up and then Sam..." Santana trailed off.
"Fuck we've always had the same guys." Santana mumbled and Quinn burst out into laughter.
"To be fair, I had them all first." She smirked at the Latina who shrugged and smiled.
"Yeah well, you're lucky I don't care about that anymore 'cause I got Bri-." Santana stopped herself before she said the girls name.
Quinn shook her head at the Latina. "Santana, I know!" She sighed frustrated. "I've known you two were hooking up since we started having those sleep overs after joining Cheerio's! Which by the way, ew and thank you for scaring me for life."
Santana blushed but pretended not to be embarrassed by what the blonde was saying.
"I just never realized that it was more than that until you vomited all of your lesbian all over the place when you guys sang 'Landslide' to each other. You seriously thought everyone else thought you were just best friends after singing that to each other? You were crying."
"Hey, fuck you!" Santana snapped taking Quinn's comments as an insult.
Quinn rolled her eyes. "And if you think about it, it's pretty obvious anyway. I think Brittany is the only person at our school you haven't physically assaulted or verbally abused."
Santana's face softened at Quinn's words. She knew it was true and she couldn't deny it.
"Well..." Santana didn't have anything to say but she had to say something to stop her feeling so awkward.
"You really love her?" Quinn asked.
Santana stared at the other girl for a long moment before nodding her head.
"So...what are you then?" Quinn was curious to know. The blonde knew that Santana must be into guys after seeing her all over a hell of a lot of them in the past but now that she was in love with Brittany, Quinn wasn't sure.
Santana shrugged at the question, not wanting to answer, not sure if she could trust Quinn.
"I wont tell anyone, Santana. If you're not ready, that's okay but...If we're going to be friends again I think we should trust each other." Quinn spoke softly and comfortingly. The blonde was genuinely interested in building a relationship back up with the Latina again.
Santana searched Quinn's eyes for a good minute before sighing and dropping her gaze to the floor.
"I'm...I'm gay, Quinn." The Latina lifted her head and exhaled the words in a confident voice.
"Gay?" Quinn questioned immediately, more than shocked.
"I'm not going to re-live the horrors that were Puckerman and Finn and all those other guys to explain this to you but...yeah, I am." Santana's voice was still confident. She was proud of herself, she was slowly but surely coming out and honestly, it felt wonderful.
"Okay." Quinn nodded accepting what Santana was saying despite being shocked by it, she had expected Santana to say she was bisexual or that it was just Brittany but in a way Quinn understood. "Can I ask what Brittany...?"
"Ugh." Santana sighed. "She's bi-curious or something. I think she means bisexual."
Quinn nodded again, feeling a little uncomfortable by the silence that fell between them.
"Don't say anything, will you?" Santana asked quietly. "I don't want anyone else finding out yet."
"Oh." Quinn responded her mind immediately going to Santana's father who she knew from only knowing the man for a short-period of time, or rather from only being in his presence for a short period of time that he would be less than happy when Santana told him."Sure."
Santana knew that Quinn must know about how her father would feel. The blonde had met him on just a few occasions but somehow he had managed to voice his opinions on the subject when Quinn could hear. Quinn said nothing more about it thinking that she would either just make Santana angry or upset.
"So do you want to do something?" Quinn asked hesitantly. "Like watch a movie or..?"
"Sure." Santana shrugged.
"I have rules though," Quinn smirked and Santana raised an eyebrow. "Considering that you're now a lesbian and you therefore must be attracted to me because I'm a girl..."
Quinn burst out laughing unable to continue but not needing to for the Latina to get that it was a joke.
"Fuck you, Fabray!" Santana smirked and for the first time since entering the house she felt relaxed and comfortable.
The Latina sat down on Quinn's bed while Quinn got the movie ready. The blonde was still giggling about what she had said and the way Santana had reacted. Santana was relieved that Quinn hadn't thrown her out considering she was a Christian and all but then again, the she had no problem with Kurt or at least no bigger problems with him than she had with anyone else.
As both girls settled back on Quinn's bed to watch the movie, they smiled at each other, knowing that their friendship would be a hard one to maintain but both were more than willing to work on it.