Chapter 14 (Nori)
When I wake up, there's more sunlight in the room than usual. I blink and fight my way through the Ambien haze. I hate taking it-I always feel like a zombie for the first hour of the day. But there's no denying it makes me sleep, so I hadn't argued with Remy when he'd handed me a pill last night. God knows I needed a little rest, and the Ambien had even kept my nightmares away. I'm not sure why, but my nightmares seem to attract the Phoenix.
I stretch my arms and look over at Remy. He's sitting up in bed beside me and he gives me a slow grin. "Mornin', cher."
"Hey," I say. I curl up and rest my head against his chest.
He strokes my hair and says, "I brought up some tea for you, but it's cold now."
"What? How long have I been asleep?"
"It's nine," he says.
"How long have you been awake?" It isn't like him to be up early if he doesn't have to be.
"Oh, a few hours." He hesitates before adding, "Just had a little bit of a bad dream is all."
"Why didn't you wake me?" And how did I manage to sleep through it?
"Y'needed your sleep, cher. Anyway, just seein' that you were here and still breathin', that was enough for me."
It sounds like a sappy line but in this case I'm pretty sure it's true. I shiver. I was so sure I was going to die yesterday, and I know everyone else thought so too.
"This bed feels enormous with just the two of us," I say.
"I'm not enough for you, cher?" he asks.
I laugh and pull his face down for a gentle kiss."You're too much for me, love," I say, and he really is. When we'd first met, I'd been hesitant about involving myself with Remy LeBeau. He was handsome and impossibly charming, and I'd loved flirting with him. But I didn't know if I could trust him-I didn't know what was beneath that bewitching veneer. But it turned out that Remy is simply charming and loving down to the core. He'd learned to use his charm for cons because he had to-and I can't deny that he enjoyed that work, or at least parts of it. But now he's happy to use that charm for no reason other than to make me smile.(Or to talk me out of my clothes, but that's rarely a hard sell.)
He kisses me again, a little harder, and then pulls back. "You were so brave yesterday, cher."
"I wasn't brave. I just... I just did what I had to do."
"Pretty much the definition of bravery, ma mie."
"I'm so glad you were there, Remy."
He scoffs. "You think I'd let you go face Sinister and Mesmero without me? Never. So long as I'm in my right mind, my place is by your side."
I rest my head against his chest again and sigh, murmuring, "I love you so much." I gently focus my empathy on him and project little waves of contentment and affection.
"Love you too, cherie. Don't... don't know what I'd do without you."
"Well. I'm here," I say. I give him one more kiss before rising and getting dressed. Remy watches me, a tender expression on his face.
"C'mon, Remy, let's go get some new tea." I pick up the mug and sniff the cold tea. I take an experimental sip, but it's awful.
"All right, cher, just let me get dressed," he says.
I roll my eyes. "Five minutes, LeBeau. The clock's running."
He laughs. "Cher, not all of us can look as good as you without a little prep time." Ugh, how did he just turn my jab at his vanity into a compliment for me? He's good. I sit on the bed and grin at him.
Four minutes and fifty-nine seconds later, Remy nonchalantly asks, "Well, cher, ready for breakfast?" I roll my eyes and take his offered elbow. I breathe in the scent of his cologne and feel warm inside. Downstairs, I make myself a fresh cup of tea and savor it. Remy makes me oatmeal with raisins and brings it over to me. Sometimes he reminds me of a small child seeking approval. He's always doing sweet little things for me, and then waiting expectantly to see if he'll be praised. I'm happy to do it, though. He deserves it, and I don't think he got much of it as a child.
"Thanks, love," I say, offering him a big smile.
He smiles back and sips his coffee. "Anything for you, cher."
"Didn't you make any for yourself?" I ask.
"I had something earlier."
I nod and eat my oatmeal. It's a little undercooked, but it was made with love. When I'm finished, I put my bowl in the dishwasher and say, "Let's go down to the medbay."
Remy looks sullen at that idea. "Are you sure you're ready to go back down there, cher? I know it ain't easy for you."
"Let's just see how they're doing."
"All right," Remy says reluctantly. "But please, cher, don't push yourself too hard."
"I promise." He sighs and goes downstairs with me. I've been at Xavier's for over two years now and the difference between the shiny, futuristic basement and the antique upper levels of the house still startles me. In the medbay, we find Logan pacing. Hank, Xavier, and Jean are sitting together and conversing quietly. Xavier's back in his wheelchair. He looks alert. His mental presence had been easy to find with Jean. Not like Scott's, which had seemed... drained.
Scott and Erik are still unconscious. Mystique and Pyro are gone. I stretch out with my telepathy and find them in the gym.
Logan gives me a concerned look. I give him a hug. The other three don't seem to have noticed our entrance, and I say, "Good morning."
They turn to look at me. Jean has a strange look in her eyes. Xavier gives me a terse smile and says, "Good morning, Nori."
"How is everyone?" I ask.
"Nori, please help me," Jean says.
Remy and Logan make small, disapproving rustles. But I say, "Of course."
I open my telepathic link to Remy and Logan and say, If one of you were hurt like this, you'd better believe I'd ask everyone I could think of to help you.
Nori, she's the one who hurt Scott, Remy points out.
It wasn't her fault, I think.
"I didn't mean to hurt him," Jean says. Was she eavesdropping? I try to keep my expression neutral. She says, "I didn't mean to eavesdrop, either. It just... just happened."
I smile at her. "I understand, Jean. Let's try to help Scott."
In my head, Xavier says, Nori, she's very powerful. Be careful. Um, duh, I think. Xavier probably heard me think that. Jean probably heard it too. Whatever.
"I don't want to hurt anyone," Jean says. "It just happens."
"I know," I say. We kneel next to Jean. Magnifying her power is like nothing I've ever felt before. Her energy glows so brightly. It blinds my mind's eye. But I've done it before. I know what I'm looking for. I know what my limits are. I reach out and twine my energy with Jean's. I try to twine them both with Scott's, but Scott's energy has been worn down to a nub. There's barely anything left of Scott there, but there's something. I'm well-rested. I'm up to this task. I think. I hope.
I tighten my control. It's like picking up a playing card with tweezers. Remy could do this, I think, and I smile to myself. I picture myself with Remy's long, delicate fingers, and I use them to pluck at Scott's energy. I manage to grasp it a few times, but it falls out of my touch. I suck my lips and keep trying. It's so hard. But finally, finally, I get it. I pull it out long and thin like taffy. I connect it to Jean. I watch, startled, as the strand of Scott's power begins to pull something out from Jean. Of course. Jean/Phoenix consumed Scott's power. But he needs it back. He's getting it back. It's working! I'm so excited to watch it play out that I barely notice when my vision starts to go white.
When I wake up, Remy's looking at me. He's angry, worried, happy.
"Oh," I say. "Did I pass out?"
"Yes, cher."
"Sorry," I say, which I guess is dumb. It's not like I did it on purpose. It's just that Remy looks so hurt.
He smiles. "I guess I forgive you, ma mie."
"Hey. Did it work? Is Scott okay?"
Remy comes behind me and says, "Why don't you sit up and see for yourself?" I do, with his hands on my shoulders. I see Scott and Jean sitting on an exam table, their arms around each other and talking quietly.
"Yay," I say.
"You did good," Logan rumbles. I turn my head and see him standing behind me.
"Thanks, Logan," I say. I take stock of my situation. I'm still wearing my regular clothes, and I don't even have an IV in. I must not have been out for very long. Lazily, I open a link to the two of them and send out wordless affection.
They sigh. Remy squeezes my shoulders and Logan comes closer and ruffles my hair. Xavier wheels himself over to us. He smiles at me. "Good job, Nori. Thank you."
"Yes, of course," I say.
"Perhaps you should rest," he says. "You and Jean can try to help Erik later."
"What time is it?" I ask.
"It's almost twelve."
"Noon?"
"Yes."
"I want to teach my class. It's still at one, right?"
Xavier blinks. "Are you sure you feel up to that?"
"Yes. Yes. I haven't taught my class in like a month."
"No one expects you to return to teaching so soon after—after everything," Xavier reassures me.
"But I miss it," I say. "I miss them. And I am fine."
"Well—very well," Xavier says. "But don't push yourself too hard."
I smile. "Teaching music is like not that physically demanding."
Xavier nods. "All right. But take care of yourself, Nori."
"Remy will make sure that I do," I say. Xavier laughs, and Remy tightens his grip on my shoulders.
"You hungry, cher?" he asks, ignoring Xavier.
"Yeah," I say. Using my power like that always makes me hungry. And tired. Honestly, it reduces me to being a cranky toddler. Though not as cranky as Remy is right now.
"Let's go to lunch, then," he says. I nod and climb down off the bed. Remy and Logan flank me.
In the hallway, I say, "I'm fine, you know. It isn't like I'm an eighty-year-old woman."
Pyro comes out of the locker room and approaches us. He's damp, freshly showered. "Taking your sweet time about healing Magneto, huh, Echo?"
I look up at him and say, gently, "We're going to try this afternoon, Pyro. It isn't easy, you know."
He sneers. "You've always been weak."
"She ain't weak, Pyro. She's tougher than you by far," Remy says.
"It's not a contest," I say. "Pyro, I promise I will do everything I can to help Magneto. It's just, it's just a matter of time. I need to rest. Jean... needs to rest. To focus."
Logan spits out, "Why should you, Nori? You've nearly died twice this month because of him."
I tighten my mouth. "He's doing what he thinks is right. And so am I. And so are you. Let's go now."
Logan turns to glare at Pyro over his shoulder as we leave.
"Echo..." Pyro says.
"Yes?" I say, turning back to look at him. I can't help it. There is a place in my heart for John, there always will be, no matter what he's become.
"I didn't want you to die," he says, barely above a whisper.
"Thank you," I say. "I didn't want to die either." Logan and Remy both put an arm around my shoulders and they propel me forward. "I will try, Pyro," I say over my shoulder.
In the elevator, Logan bends down and gives me a desperate kiss. I kiss him back. Remy slides himself between us and the door, just as it opens on the first floor. I pull away. Telepathically, I say, More later.
He nods and gives me a sad, longing look. It scares me a little. You okay? I ask him, privately.
I'm... this is hard, he replies.
I know, I reply. It's hard. But it's all right. Everything will be all right. I step out of the elevator. We eat lunch in the dining hall, not the small staff kitchen. The kids buzz with excitement to see us. They glance over at our table, and I smile at them. Kitty comes over and hugs me.
"Ms. LeBeau, are you all right?" she asks. "I was worried about you."
"I'm fine, Kitty," I say. "How are you?"
"It's been really—it's been really hard here, without—without everyone."
"I know. But we're back now. I'll see you in class this afternoon."
She smiles. "You're coming back to class?" she asks, excitedly.
"Yes, of course."
"Oh, great. I mean, Ms. Shapiro is nice, and all, but, um, we missed you."
"I missed you all, too."
She gives me a fleeting smile and returns to her table. I see her talk to the other kids at her table, and they all look over at us. I smile at them. I eat slow spoonfuls of black bean soup.
Remy pouts. "She didn't miss my class."
"She did," I say. "It's just that she has a little bit of a crush on you and it makes it hard for her to talk to you."
He laughs. "So, how come you talk to me, then?"
"Because I am very brave, my love."
Logan laughs at our exchange. His face looks the most relaxed I've seen it in ages. But then, that was probably the most normal conversation Remy and I've had in some time. "That you are, darlin'," he says.
I finish eating and go get ready for class. We have it in the living room, since that's where the big piano is. Kitty's spread the word that I'm planning to return, and all the students are there early.
I smile widely at them. "Hi, you guys. I missed you."
Most of them come up to hug me, and I tear up a little. I manage to keep myself from crying outright, which is a miracle.
"All right," I say. "Let's warm up." I lead them through goofy exercises, humming and "me may me moo ma may moo"-ing.
They sound good. They've clearly been practicing, and I praise them freely. They sing "Seasons of Love," which we've been working on for a long time. I can't help myself; I join in. I love singing, I love these kids, I love everything. I'm feeling overwhelmed with love when Phoenix-Jean bursts in the door. A few of the kids shriek. Some back against the wall. Those with any kind of armor or defense enact it. I walk up to Jean and say calmly, "Hey, Jean, what's going on?"
"I want this," she says.
"Okay," I say. "Why don't we go outside and talk about this in the hallway?"
She makes no response, and I say, "Okay, or, just, here." I close my eyes and think for a moment. I pull a shield down over my empathy. Jean abruptly returns to normal.
"Oh. Oh no," she says. "I'm so sorry." She starts weeping and leaves the room.
"Um. I'm sorry, guys, you were really great, we'll... we'll do this again soon, I promise," I say, trailing her out of the room.
Brave Sam Guthrie follows us. "Are you going to be all right, Ms. LeBeau?"
"Yes, Sam, thank you. Go... you guys can practice without me, please. She'll be fine. We'll be fine. Yes."
"Let me come with you."
"No, Sam. Thank you—but please stay here."
He looks skeptical, but he lets me go. Physically, he could overpower me easily. (Hell, even without using his mutant powers, the kid's still a foot taller than me.) But I'm a teacher, and he's a student, and he listens to me.
I reach out with my telepathy and find Jean out in the garden. It's March, and I'm not dressed warmly enough. I shiver and say, "Jean, come back inside. Everything's fine."
"It isn't fine," she snaps. "I don't want to hurt you. Don't want to hurt anyone. But I just—I don't know what comes over me."
I say, "It's strong emotions. You're drawn to strong emotions. And I have them."
She blinks. "Oh. Well. That makes sense. But... what am I supposed to do about that?"
"Well, I don't know. But I'm sure... I'm sure we can figure something out. With the Professor."
Scott comes outside and finds us. "Jean!" he cries. "Sam told me... told me... something happened."
She gives a sad smile. "I didn't mean to."
"Of course you didn't, hon." He looks at me. "Nori? Are you okay?"
"Just fine," I say, trying not to shiver.
"Uh huh," he says. "Well... why don't you go inside? It's too cold out."
I glance at Jean. She smiles at me and says, "Yes, go."
"Okay," I say. "I'll see you later."
I head inside and go up to our bedroom. Logan and Remy are in the gym with their class, and I want to cry. I wish they were here with me. I sigh and pull down a shield over my empathy. I don't need Jean coming over to try to devour my sadness, or whatever it is she does.
I sit down in lotus position and try to meditate. I give up after a few minutes. I think about yoga, but instead I pick up a magazine and read it. I'm lying on the couch reading about Neil Young when Remy and Logan come in. They're freshly showered after training with the students.
"Hey, guys. How was class?" I ask.
"Just fine," Remy says. "I heard yours was... interesting."
"Yeah. But, I think I figured it out... Jean's drawn to strong emotions. That's what sets off the Phoenix. She came to my class because I was so happy to be there."
Remy smiles. "Well... glad you're happy, cher."
"So, wait, what does that mean?" Logan asks. "Whenever someone feels something strongly around Jean, she's going to flip out?"
I shrug. "Not sure. But it does have to be pretty strong. Because, it's pretty much just been me, right? And I project. So those are more than just a regular feeling."
"That's for sure," Remy agrees.
"So... stop projecting until Jean figures this out, okay, darlin'?" Logan asks.
"Yeah. That seems wise," I agree. I shake my foot anxiously. Logan gives me a sad look with those deep, dark eyes of his. I sit up and pat the loveseat, and he comes to sit next to me. I snuggle up against him. I know this must be hard for Remy and Logan—they're fighters, and they can't fight Jean. I can't either, but I can negotiate with her, I guess.
"It'll be okay," I whisper. He says nothing, but he tightens his arm around me. I look up at him, and he still looks so sad. "What's wrong, Logan?"
He shakes his head. "Nothin'."
I let out an exasperated sigh. I could easily just pluck it from his mind, but I try so hard not to use my telepathy for things like that. He should be allowed to have his secrets, even if they are making him sad. I lean forward and kiss his cheek and say, "You can tell us, whenever you're ready to talk about it."
Remy says, "Cher, it's you."
"What?" I ask.
"It was so hard... so hard to watch that happening to you."
Logan's arm around me tightens further. If it gets any tighter, I think I'll get bruises. But I don't want to tell him that. "It wasn't like super awesome to have it happen to me, you know," I say. "But it's over."
Logan snorts. "Is it? Jean's still the Phoenix, half the Brotherhood's still in the basement, and I'm not at all convinced that Sinister is down for the count."
I shrug. "Then we'll deal with that when it comes. But the present is what we have right now. And right now, things are okay."
I can tell Logan is still tense, but I don't know what else I can say to him. I let down my shield a tiny bit and send out reassurance with my empathy.
He jerks away. "Don't! Don't use that. And don't think you can just make me think everything's okay. It's not."
I put my shield back up and pull my knees up to my chest. "Sorry," I whisper.
Logan sighs. "I should go," he says. "I should... I should go."
"You don't have to," I say.
"Yeah. I do." He stalks out of the room. Remy comes to take his place on the loveseat, putting his arm around me.
"I just wanted..." I say.
"You want us to be happy," Remy supplies.
I nod.
"But you can't force it, cher."
My eyes tear up. "I know, I just... I just... I'm sorry."
He laughs gently and kisses my forehead. "I don't mind it none, cherie. I'm just... I'm just glad you're here."
"Love you," I say.
"I know," he replies.
I laugh and curl into his chest. My breathing slows and I guess I fall asleep. I wake up when there's a knock at the door.
"Who's there?" Remy calls.
"It's Scott."
"Come in," Remy replies. I sit up and smoothe back my hair.
Scott comes in and looks a little awkward. "Sit down," I say. He nods and takes the desk chair.
"How are you, Scott?" I ask.
"I'm okay," he says. "I'm okay. How are you?"
"Just fine," I say.
He nods. "Nori... thank you. You... brought me back."
"Of course, Scott. I'm so glad it worked."
"Is everything okay? With Jean?" Remy asks.
"Define 'okay,'" Scott says wryly, and I laugh. Remy does not.
"We'll figure it out," I say.
"Well," Scott says. "I just wanted... to thank you. And, um, when you're ready... you know, to try.. to revive Magneto... Jean's ready. I guess."
"Thanks, Scott. We'll be down in a second."
"Thanks, Nori. See you down there."
He turns and leaves the room. I stand up and pull one of my business cards out of my desk drawer. On the back of it, I write in careful Japanese characters, "Love you. Come back when you're ready. Don't forget us." I rub it between my hands, letting my scent permeate the card. Then I slip next door and put the card in the pocket of Logan's leather jacket.
"What was that about, cher?" Remy asks.
"I gotta feeling Logan's gonna bolt soon. Just want him to remember where to come back to."
Remy smiles. "How could he forget?"
Feeling like an insecure teenage girl, but compelled to ask, I say, "You're not going to leave me too, are you?"
His face goes serious and he says, "Never, cher. I promise." He takes my hand, and I feel his wedding band against my fingers. It shouldn't reassure me, seeing as how he was married to Belladonna when we'd met, but it does. I know the difference between the forced commitment he'd made to her and the one he'd freely made to me.
"Okay. Good," I say. He bends down and kisses me sweetly. He is the best. I say, "Come on, love, let's go see if I can bring that egomaniac asshole back to life."
"You sure about that?"
I shrug. "He's getting old. We can probably just push him down some stairs if we change our mind about wanting him alive."
Remy laughs and says, "Fair enough, cher. Let's go." We take the elevator down to the gleaming basement. I take a deep breath and prepare myself to help Magneto. By my count, Magneto had saved my life once and then left me to die twice. I considered my debt to him paid, but what the hell. It never hurt to have a little extra good karma, right? Was it even good karma to save a man who'd tried to murder every human on earth? Philisophy 101 my freshman year had not prepared me for this shit.