Lana tossed and turned all night, sleeping poorly. In the confines of the tent, that meant the other two occupants slept poorly too. As a result, they all slept late, not getting up at dawn as they usually did.

Finally, a combination of crying baby and full bladder aroused Lana. She passed Laura to Clark for him to hold while she went to the latrine. Frankly, it was a pain to put on one's shoes as one left the tent, trek down into the forest, go, come back, and take off one's shoes going back into the tent. Lana longed to be home, where she could get up to pee in the middle of the night and not have to worry about stepping on a rock or a branch, or tripping over a stump, or getting her feet muddy. I just want to be able to walk on carpet, in bare feet, on a flat floor, to my heated bathroom that has real toilet paper. Not leaves.

Clark made his own trip to the forest while Lana nursed the baby. He came back, looking as flat as Lana felt, his usual good humor a little subdued. Except for getting water, he didn't slip into super-speed while preparing breakfast as he usually did, either.

Clark glared at the woodpile in the firepit; he'd set it up the night before. The wood obligingly burst into flames. Clark set the water pan on the cooking grill, not helping it boil with the heat vision, letting it heat up naturally. He looked into the backpack and pulled out the last dehydrated meal. He sighed and got it ready.

Lana finished nursing, came over, and wordlessly handed him the baby. By now they had a morning routine down. Clark could tell that Lana still craved an early morning coffee; alas, by now they were out of even herbal tea. She settled for boiled-then-cooled lake water. Clark glanced at her; Lana looked as tired and mopey as he did.

"Last dehydrated meal." Clark broke the morning stillness, startling Lana and the baby.

"Oh."

Clark sat down next to her. "Well, the good news is that I think we're close to the edge of the forest. Once we get onto some open terrain, I can go really fast till we get to a road. And once we get to a road, we'll be back to civilization in no time."

"Oh." Lana looked at the ground dully. Both of them seemed to have serious enthusiasm issues this morning.

"Clark?"

"Yes?"

"Do you mind if we take a break today?"

Clark sat back on his haunches. "A break?"

"I'm tired of traveling and I want a day off."

Really, it was fine with him. He was only worried about her. "Well, it's OK with me. But I'm worried about what you'll eat. We've got a little bear left, and some duck, and I can probably go out and catch a quail or something, or maybe catch some fish…" He gestured at the tiny lake he'd found to be their campsite last night.

"Anything will be fine."

They stayed camped at this new lake for the day. Lana and the baby napped while Clark fished. He quickly found that he lacked all skill at fishing with a hook and line. And despite super-speed, it was harder than he thought to knock a fish out of the water. Eventually he found the best way was to wait quietly until the fish came up to him, then grab one with super-speed. He missed a few at first due to overcompensating for the water's refraction.

Clark gutted and filleted the fish, and cooled them down with an exhalation. That was an ability that had been pretty darn useful on this trip; storing food; without it, he'd have to have hunted every day, delaying their return even more.

Clark paced around their campsite, thinking about the future. It didn't bother him to take a day off, considering what was waiting for him when he and Lana returned. They'd get to some town and contact Lex, or Lionel, or some Luthorcorp person somehow. There would be some talk about Clark, coincidentally an old flame of the bride's, just happening to go hiking and just happening to find Lana, but with no specific proof, that could be ignored.

But then Lana would reunite with Lex. She'd tell Lex about Clark's secret, or he'd worm it out of her. Clark grimaced as he followed that train of thought. Lex would stand astounded for maybe a microsecond. Then he would realize it all made sense. Then, after a period of thought, he'd work out some plan to either expose Clark, or more probably, blackmail him to do Lex's bidding.

Clark was ready, although certainly not willing, to live with his secret exposed if he had to. He dreaded the thought of it; it had been a feature of his nightmares ever since he was a kid and realized he could do things other people couldn't. The nightmares had really increased in frequency and intensity about two days after his father first showed him Clark's spaceship.

But what Clark feared most was the effect on his friends and family. What would happen to his mother? What about Chloe? How would Lois feel about him? He'd have to go through the whole "revealing" thing again – it would be hard to face the frightened glances again. Maybe he didn't care how the people on the street took the news, but what about the people he was closest to? He knew that Lex would use the people Clark loved, somehow, to get Clark to do what he wanted.

Clark was actually surprised that Lex hadn't lashed out at Clark's loved ones so far. He attributed Lex's restraint to a combination of things: Lex not really hating, and possibly even respecting, Martha Kent. Lionel extending some protection over the Kents. Martha being a senator and public figure. Lex knowing that Lana still had feelings, if not for Clark, at least for Mrs. Kent. Chloe might have something incriminating on Luthorcorp and on Lex. And, perhaps, the feeling that only Clark himself was Lex's opponent, and everyone else was in, sort of…a lesser weight class…maybe.

But when Lana spilled the beans, all bets were off. Clark's powers at Lex's control – a thought not to be borne. Clark thought about calling Oliver Queen; he'd need a billionaire on his own side; he'd certainly need a new identity. Too bad Virgil Swann was dead; Clark had a feeling that Dr. Swann could have understood his predicament and would have helped him.

Clark would have to leave Smallville, leave Kansas. Being a fugitive – maybe the government wouldn't bother to chase your run-of-the-mill felon. But they'd certainly be interested in what an alien had to tell them. They'd be so interested, in fact, that they'd chase him down wherever Clark went. The unique opportunity of capturing a real live extraterrestrial would guarantee Clark's face on the airwaves, publicity for months, a nationwide – no, a worldwide search. Options that humans had, like plastic surgery, weren't possible for him. He wouldn't be able to change his face. All he would be able to do would be things like changing his posture, acting nerdy, wearing glasses, or similar lame disguise attempts.

Clark sighed as he thought about the frightening future. He looked at the other hand. He could kill Lex. Lana had said she wouldn't tell anyone else, and he believed her. It was only Lex who knew her and Clark well enough, and knew the history between them, who would be able to get the secret out of Lana. So all Clark had to do was silence Lex. And dead men tell no tales.

Clark actually considered it. It would be easy. There were so many ways he could kill someone. Humans were so fragile, really. Frightening, but seductive images coursed through his mind. He could knock Lex out, and just hit a little too hard. Burn Lex with the heat vision. Rip off Lex's head. Or maybe just his arms, and let him bleed out. Freezing Lex, or sucking out all the air in the room and letting Lex drown in vacuum. Super-speed while holding Lex only by the hand, and let Lex's neck be broken, or at least give him a really bad case of whiplash. Or just picking up Lex, going to a tall building, and throwing him off. Of course, it would be difficult to kill Lex quietly, giving himself an alibi, and also in such a way that Lionel wouldn't know. Maybe he could arrange a poisoning – it wouldn't be hard to speed in and contaminate Lex's drinks. And a poisoning could be blamed on someone else – heck, maybe Lionel could be framed? Lionel had tried that before. But Clark would use a proper dose and Lex would be finished off properly this time. Like the game of "Clue", but for real. It was Mr. Kent, with the poison, in the library.

Clark contemplated it, then indulged in thinking of progressively more complicated and impractical murder plans, finally working out an elaborate Rube-Goldbergian scheme involving a huge pile of newspapers (the Daily Planet, of course, in homage to Chloe), whipped cream, an Allen wrench, five gerbils, and the complete-volume set (1911 edition) of the Encyclopedia Britannica. Then he sat back and laughed at the absurdity. There was no way would ever do something like that. He wasn't a killer. He wouldn't use his abilities that way; it would taint them.

And, especially after seeing Laura, he couldn't kill anyone. To see a new soul, look into her eyes…it made one realize that souls came one to a customer and they were unique. When a soul departed this world, it left a pretty big hole. Not just in the physical world, but in the souls of those who loved them. Clark had found that out when his father died. The hole in Clark's soul would be there the rest of his life – it wasn't something that healed. And to deliberately crush out a life…Clark couldn't do it. Or rather, he possessed the capability and he could. But he wouldn't.

So it was time to start thinking of a plan. The first thing he'd do would be going to Chloe, tell her; then he'd contact Oliver Queen, get some help on the new identity front. It would be difficult for his mother, with her senatorial career, and her life and friends in Smallville, to move; when Clark moved away, he'd just have to be careful about contacting her. Of course, when the truth came out, her placid lifestyle would be a thing of the past too.

Clark looked up as Lana came out of the tent, for once not holding the baby. Her hair was unkempt and her walk slow.

"Clark", she said.

"Yes?"

"I've been thinking." Lana slowly walked to him.

"Yes?"

"I never really thanked you, you know, for everything. Everything you've done." Lana seemed a little abashed.

Clark was taken aback. "Well…um…"

"I mean, you've done so much for me. For us. Not counting all the stuff in the past. You came here for me, to get me." Lana wiped aside some moisture in her eyes. "I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate it."

Quietly, Clark said, "You're welcome."

Lana continued, words spilling out, now that she had decided to talk. "I mean, you've been doing all the work. I'm a little ashamed about that – I mean, I can do something – I worked in the Talon, I can cook, I could help set up the camp. Just on this trip – you've done it all."

Clark cast around. "Um, you don't have to….it's OK…" The obvious rejoinder came to his lips. "You've been taking care of Laura. I couldn't do that." He leaned over, reached for her hand. She let him take it. "And you just had a baby. That's a whole lot of work in itself." More than I ever knew, he thought. I've never seen labor and delivery before, and it's…it's something.

He continued. "My Dad…if my Dad were still here…he'd kill me if I didn't take care of you. Or anybody in the same position." He squeezed Lana's hand slightly. "With everything you're doing for Laura…I consider the work fifty-fifty."

Lana smiled a bit. "And I'd probably only get in your way, anyway."

"Well…"

Lana's voice turned serious as she changed the subject. "You said that we'd probably be back to civilization tomorrow."

"That's assuming that we get out into open country where you're not at risk if I run fast, and if I can find a road. Once we get on a road, I can really put on the speed. And roads usually lead to a city or town somewhere." Clark stirred the fire, avoiding her gaze. He didn't want to think about the aftermath; he'd spent the afternoon having nightmares about that already.

"You know, Clark, I've been thinking", Lana said again.

"Yes?" That statement seemed to call for a one-word answer.

"It's about getting back home."

"Yes?"

"I don't want to tell your secret", Lana said.

"Well, that's good. I don't want you to tell anyone my secret either." Clark couldn't keep a tart tone from his voice.

Lana looked like she was going to say something, then bit off her words. Obviously changing her first words, Lana blurted, "Why did you tell Chloe?" Why'd you tell her and not me?

Clark glanced away from her, poked the fire. "I kind of had to tell her", he said slowly. "She snooped around and she saw me using my abilities in a way that I couldn't gloss over or hide." He remembered back to the Big Moment, when he'd come clean to Chloe. "How long have you known?" he asked her.

"Well, I've had my suspicions for a long time. But when I saw you catch..a car…like it was a beachball, that kind of confirmed it." Chloe gave an ironic smile.

Clark couldn't help contrasting Chloe's reaction – Chloe had been incredulous for a moment, then given him a big smile. He'd known then that it would be all right between the two of them. So different from Lana's frantic revulsion. But then, Chloe hadn't seen the alien disciples of Zod use their powers for destruction, either.

Don't think about that. "I wanted to tell you almost every day", he said to Lana. That was true. He'd thought about it every day. Not just thought about it – obsessed about it, brooded on it, rehearsed it a million times. Then he'd gone ahead and actually told her. And by that night Lana was dead.

Clark wasn't going to tell her that. Discussing that could only lead to painful disclosures. He alone was responsible for his father's death – the thought brought a familiar tinge of guilt and pain. If he told Lana the whole sequence of events, she might figure out that her life had been traded for Jonathan Kent's. Clark would not allow her to take on any of that burden. It was his alone.

"Why didn't you, then?" Lana asked.

Clark sighed. "I was afraid", he said. "I know I said this before, but I was scared." He looked away. "First, I was scared of how you'd react."

"With good reason", Lana said softly.

Clark reached over, took her hand. "I was afraid that you would see me differently."

Lana looked away. She didn't want to speak.

Clark continued. "And it's dangerous to know."

"Dangerous?"

"Lana, some other people have found out my secret besides Chloe. And a lot of those people are hurt or dead. Or they ended up in Belle Reve."

Lana thought about it. "I'm guessing a lot of them are people with meteor powers, and you had to use your abilities to stop them."

"That's right", Clark said, glad she understood. "I try not to hurt them, but a lot of times their own actions lead to…a bad outcome." There's a good euphemism, Clark, he told himself cynically. "Even being around me seems to be dangerous", he said bitterly. "Look at all the trouble you've been in. How much of that did I cause?"

Lana withdrew her hand from his. "Clark Kent", she said in a firm tone, "You are not responsible for all the crazy people in the world and what they do." She spoke more softly. "Besides, now I realize that you've been looking out for me all along."

"Yes", Clark admitted.

"And that's why I don't want to tell your secret." Lana stood. "But I know Lex will be able to tell that something is different. He knows me. He knows you. He'll be able to figure out that something has changed between us. I don't know if I'll be able to keep it from him."

Clark was silent. He was all in favor of keeping confidences. He didn't think Lana would be able to keep quiet either.

"I've been thinking…"

"Yes?" Again with the cryptic statements. He was getting tired of this.

"Clark, can you hypnotize me?"