Chapter XXVIII: The Confession

Teelina sat alone in her bedroom, her hair hanging loose around her face. She had not left the room since the previous night when she and Moria had entered it together. During that time, she had not been alone but for a few seconds, aside from when she had been sleeping.

Now that both Moria and Man-at-Arms had left her, the Sorceress found the silence deafening. She was left only with her thoughts, and they were doing nothing to comfort her. The redhead found herself wondering if Moria would even come back, or if it had been only a one-time visitation. The doubts that had been shoved aside by the elder woman earlier this morning came smashing back into the foreground of her mind all at once, each question leading to another in the Sorceress' mind.

Even if the elder Dereskian returned, what was the point of continuing the relationship, if that was what this was? They fought on two different sides, had different goals and two very different ways of living. Was there any real reason for continuing when there could be no happy ending for either of them?

She sighed raggedly, massaging her temple with her index and middle finger. Since Moria had returned from her isolation, Teelina could at least say she had been getting many more headaches. Lying back on her bed, she looked up at the gray stones and walls around her. What was she doing, bringing this woman whom she had been taught all of her life was the enemy into the sacred walls of the Elder's power? Had she lost her senses completely?

The protector of Grayskull closed her eyes, trying to make sense of her mind. Somehow amidst the utter chaos of her thoughts, her eyes began to move rapidly beneath her eyelids, and she fell into a fitful dreamscape the likes of which she had never seen before.

Teelina found herself in a realm of fire and ice, a place that was both frozen cold and liquid hot at once. Her overall impression was of black fire, something that gave off light and yet consumed it at the same time. She looked around confusedly, feeling her surroundings flash forward while she remained still... or perhaps it was the other way around.

She found herself flashing through eight separate realms, some with other people, some without. The first four dominions were dark and foreboding, while three of the next four were light and all the people she saw laughing. As she looked around at them, she realized something very peculiar. Every one of the faces she saw was that of a Dereskian. All around her, men, women and children with pale skin and hair so white it shone silver stood laughing, fighting, standing or sitting.

The final realm flashed before her and then stopped, leaving the redhead in a field filled with flowers the likes of which she had never seen. Above her, the night sky was covered in twinkling stars that all seemed to be either purple or red tinted. She looked around confusedly. Teelina was far used to her dreams not making sense, but this was quite possibly the most absurd dream she had concocted since donning Grayskull's mantle.

"Where am I?" she asked in Eternian, and the very air around seemed to constrict around and consume her words, so that not even she could hear what she had said. Now even more confused, she idly played with the ends of her hair, taking a few tentative steps forward.

Behind her, where she had already stepped, the grass and flowers she had trod upon shriveled and died, her presence impugning this strange place, or so it seemed.

Teelina kept walking forward, the light of the Moons amplified at least tenfold in this place, making it almost as bright as the sun, and yet she was still able to view the stars. "Is anyone there?" she questioned, again in Eternian, and again her words were not heard.

She wandered farther forward, aware that a small wind was picking up, making her clothes ripple. Her clothes. She paused, looking down. She realized that not only was she no longer dressed in her traditional outfit, she was dressed in something she did not even own. It was a loose fitting garment, of the purest white with what seemed to be thousands of tiny dark blue eight-pointed stars embroidered all over it. It draped over her like a robe, and the wind whipped it around slowly, letting it billow as she continued walking.

Teelina came to a great lake, and titled her head, looking around to see if anyone was nearby and could tell her where she was. She knew she was dreaming, but there was almost always a point to her dreams, and if she could not deduce it herself, she knew there should be someone in the dream itself who could.

Finding no one, she again turned to the water, leaning down to see if there was anything that might be of use at the bottom of the lake. As she peered into the waters, a pale and glittering hand rose from its depths, pulling her into the water before she could even utter a protest.

Teelina fought against the tide of the water, being pushed further and further down into the depths of the pool. The hand attached to her arm would not let go, and soon the redhead felt that her lungs would explode from the lack of air.

{Then breathe} came a voice in a language Teelina did not know, and yet the voice was one the Sorceress was certain she had heard before.

How?! she exclaimed mentally, her lungs desperate for air.

She heard the same voice quoting calmly as she was dragged deeper and farther into the depths. {'Absorb thyself in this great sea of the waters of life. Dive deep in it-- until thou hast lost thyself. And having lost thyself, then thou shalt find thyself again. Even as it is written, "She had her dwelling in the great sea-- and was a fish therein."'}

Desperate enough to try anything, the redhead opened her mouth and took in water... and found herself completely dry, standing in a large hall of white marble.

This is getting more and more peculiar by the minute, she said to herself, looking around the great hall she was in. She turned, and directly behind her was an enormous throne, upon which sat a woman.

"Who are you?" she asked in Eternian, but the words grew louder and louder, echoing all around the halls until they became deafening, causing Teelina to cry out and put her hands to her ears.

With a wave of the woman's hand, the echoes ceased.

Taking her hands from her ears, the Sorceress looked again at the woman. Her hair was draped over her eyes, and her face was hidden in shadows. Teelina thought at first that the woman was naked, but then realized that what she had taken for shadows and reflections of light were actually a very elaborate and elegant design that spiraled and arced all the way to the floor. "Where am I?" she asked, this time in Dereskian. Her words carried unfettered. "Who are you?" she questioned again, the woman's expression cool and unchanging.

The woman raised her head, her hair still covering the majority of her face. She did not answer.

"Where are we?" Teelina asked again, her tone becoming impatient.

{Helyuin}, came the voice, this time definitely coming from the woman.

The redhead gasped, looking at her surroundings suddenly. "The Eighth Hell?" she exclaimed wildly, eyes panicked. "Am I dead?"

{No. You are dreaming, as you well know.}

The Sorceress turned back to the woman taking a step closer to her. "Why am I here? Only the dead enter the Nine Hells. I'm not dead, so what am I doing here?"

{The Dead can enter the dreams of the guilty. I, regretfully, cannot enter into your reality, even in your dream. But you can enter Mine.}

Taking another step closer, the Sorceress processed what she had just been told. "So you're dead?" she asked. The woman slowly nodded, her long white hair shifting the slightest bit with the movement. "Who are you?" the Sorceress asked once again, genuine curiosity in her tone.

The woman moved her hair away from her face, her ice blue eyes flashing as Teelina's mouth dropped in recognition.

{Moria.}

A large gasp escaped the redhead as the younger sister of the Dereskian Queen rose from her chair, striding purposefully down the short dais upon which her chair had been situated.

"Why have you entered my dream?" Teelina asked after the shock of realizing who this was had passed over her.

{You feel guilt. You feel as though you have betrayed your mother's people by allowing my sister into your bed. The Dead can only enter the dreams of the guilty.}

"Is that why you didn't enter her dream?" Teelina questioned, meaning Moria. "Does she not have feelings of guilt?"

{My sister... does not dream.} The reply was soft and the white-haired woman looked away, as if pained.

The Sorceress dropped her gaze, a little sorry for this woman before her. "Oh," she said softly. "I'm sorry."

The woman, Moria, sighed gently and then looked up, locking eyes with Teelina. {You cannot linger here. Already your body is trying to reclaim you from my grasp.}

Nodding, the Sorceress agreed. "What did you want to say to me?" she questioned, here eyes almost pleading.

{Nothing. I only wanted to warn you.} The younger Moria turned away and faced the wall.

Teelina tilted her head to the side and looked questioningly at the dead woman. "Warn me of what?" she asked, taking a few tentative steps forward.

The white-haired woman whirled, striking the Sorceress sharply in her stomach. Teelina gasped in shock and struggled for breath, falling to her knees. It was only when Moria pulled back that Teelina saw the knife in her grasp.

Her body going into shock as blood soaked through her garment, the redhead looked with wide, questioning eyes into the dead woman's gaze. Her eyes flashed and became twin pools of amethyst.

{My sister.... Moria,} came the echo as darkness fell around Teelina. {She will lead you to death.}

 ..................................

She awoke with a start, her breath heavy as she lay panting on her bed. Teelina's eyes darted around, her brain trying to orient itself after that extremely odd dream. As her breathing lessened, she realized she was in her own room, on her bed in Grayskull.

The Sorceress breathed a great sigh of relief. What a dream that had been. She idly tried to piece together what it had meant. She did not know why the Dereskian Queen's sister had appeared in her dream, and certainly did not understand why she had stabbed her. Still, she was certain that it had been the younger sister. It was the only possible explanation for her having identical features to Moria's, and yet also possessing blue eyes the same color as her own.

A small shiver went up Teelina's spine as she made that connection. "My eyes..." she whispered softly herself, reaching up a hand to the side of her face. "Moria's face... and... Helyuin...."

She paused, trying to remember what the Eighth Hell of the Dereskígía represented. She went over each of them in her mind, being a little rusty on the subject of Dereskian mythology.

Tartura, Regalto, Yentina, Thesios, Aldariena, Anduinire, Arainia, Helyuin, and Perseinia, she remembered, listing them as she had first learned them, from the first to the ninth.

Each serves as both a Hell and a Heaven, but the Nine are more commonly referred to as Hells because it is simpler to imagine it that way. She paused, trying to remember how the system of Dereskian Hells worked.

...After Death, a Dead soul offers a portion of the energy or power that it had in Life to the Collective, which Moria wields currently. After that energy is accepted, the soul is sent to one of the Nine Hells, whichever one would suit the personality they had in Life best.

Teelina struggled to remember, and centered her mind only on facts concerning Helyuin. It is the Eighth Hell, she reminded herself. The souls who go there... she tried, but could not recall what the qualifications were. She tried again to remember, but the remnants of her dream rose in her mind and pushed out any helpful information she might have remembered.

Idly, she realized that something the dead woman had said did not make sense. She had stabbed her, yes, and taken on her sister's eye color, but rather than taking this to mean the Dereskian Queen would kill her, Teelina recall something else.

She will lead you to death, Moria had said. Not, she will lead to your death. That had not been specified. So what did that mean?

"It means," came a nearby voice, "that if you stay with me, Death will come." Teelina whirled around and saw the older sister of the Moria in her dream sitting in a chair. Her expression was unreadable, even to Teelina. "But my sister does not know to whom."

Teelina looked at her, almost amazed that she was here. "You knew?" she questioned, nearly alarmed. "You knew she had entered my dream?"

"Who do you think pulled you out of it, dear?" Moria questioned in return, the barest hint of a smirk on her otherwise serious face. She rose and then sat on the edge of the bed next to the redhead. Sighing softly, she regarded the Sorceress for a moment before admitting, "My sister was always one to interfere with people's dreams, even when she was alive. She was the one who taught me how to do so." The elder woman paused and smoothed back a stay hair from the Sorceress' face. "I never expected she would slip into yours."

The Sorceress looked at her gently, almost unconsciously leaning into her touch. "How could she do that?" she questioned. "Enter my dream, I mean. ...She mentioned that the Dead could enter the dreams of the guilty."

A small smile twitched at the corners of Moria's mouth. "Yes. One of many reasons why I do not allow myself to sleep." She caressed Teelina's cheek gently. "But what could you feel guilty about, I wonder?" she asked, an almost teasing tone in her voice.

"She said that I felt as though I was dishonoring my task and my mother's people by letting you into my bed," Teelina admitted slowly. "I suppose... I did think that," she finished, her gaze lowered.

Moria looked at her curiously, her eyes questioning. She shook her head slowly. "...No... That wouldn't have allowed her inside your mind. You would have to feel guilt about something that concerned her."

After the moment it took this statement to sink in, the Sorceress gasped suddenly, and looked away, closing her eyes. "I..." she began, breaking off. "...I..."

"Yes, Teelina?" the elder woman asked, raising the younger woman's gaze to meet her own.

The Sorceress turned away from the pale hand, unable to meet her eyes. She took a deep breath, and then continued speaking. "...Immediately after the War of Three Days... when you and your sister had been captured.... Mindor..." she paused as Moria growled a bit at the name. "He ...came to me, asking for advice. He asked me ...how he should best... go about ...'questioning' you as to the whereabouts of the books." she admitted, the words having a foul taste in her mouth.

Moria attempted to interrupt her, but Teelina waved her hand and begged her to be silent.

"Please," she almost begged, still turned away from the elder woman. "Let me finish.... This is... difficult for me. ...I have never really done much in my life that I have regretted. I do this. ...I told him that I did not know how to extract that information... that he would have more expertise than I would in that... department. ...He... chose to torture you... but, when he got to the dungeon–"

"He mistook my sister for me, and tortured her instead," Moria interrupted, her tone flat and unfeeling. "I know, Teelina. I was there."

The Sorceress turned then and looked at her, her eyes pleading. "Please let me finish, Moria." The elder woman was silent, and so she continued. "...Mindor... tortured your sister, you awoke, and escaped with her." The Sorceress took a long pause, closing her eyes as a single tear threatened to fall. "After it had become clear you had made it out of the city.... He...." She broke off, suppressing a small sob. "Mindor ... asked my aid again, and... I gave it. I told him where you had gone and... where he could hope to intercept you."

She took another deep breath, obviously struggling to continue. "He..." she began, and stumbled. She tried again after along moment, Moria looking on patiently. "He... asked me... what he had to do to make you do... what he wanted. ...He asked me what would hurt you more than death or torture ever could... and I.... I...." she couldn't continue, tears running down her face. "I told him..." she gasped, pushing onward. "I told him to kill your sister," she finally confessed, her tone barely above a whisper.

The elder woman was silent for a very long time as Teelina cried, her face turned away. When at last she turned towards Moria, the pale woman's face was unreadable, her eyes expressionless. Moria Vadorian sighed after a time, staring straight into the tear-filled blue eyes before her.

"I know..." she replied, her voice laced with pain where her face was not. "I've always known." She turned away from the Sorceress, a single blood red tear falling down her face and landing on the bedcover.

Teelina looked at the tear, then back at the elder woman. "And... you aren't shocked, or... angry?" Her question was strained by tears, looking for something, any type of reaction from the elder woman. She scooted forwards and fell into the white-haired woman's arms, crying on her neck.

Moria looked at her, eyes wide at the sudden motion, her arms encircling the other woman almost unconsciously. "No," she whispered softly, her voice tender. "That pain and any blame I thought you carried dissipated long ago. There is only one living person I blame for my sister's death, and though that woman is in this room, it is not you." Almost absentmindedly, she stroked the redhead's hair, rocking her like she would a small child. She found this odd, as anyone else would have thought she would be the one crying and needed to be comforted. But she had not lied, she had known of Teelina's involvement ever since her sister had died. And, as she had said, it was not the Sorceress she blamed, not anymore. The only one Moria had to blame, at least to her mind, was herself.

Still, hearing the younger woman admit to her involvement was not something she had readily anticipated. Nor was cradling the younger woman in her arms like a lost child. Slowly, she pulled away from the Sorceress, looking into the redhead's eyes and brushing her tears away.

Teelina looked at her and sighed raggedly, half expected more tears to fall, but glad when they did not.

"Is there anything else you'd like to tell me?" Moria asked after a moment, still holding the younger woman in her arms.

With another heavy sigh, the Sorceress nodded, and laid her head against the white-haired woman's chest. She told the Dereskian Queen everything she had ever done that she felt bad about, every single doubt she had ever carried, every little black secret that had ever lain on her heart.

Her confession lasted several hours, though nothing that she told the elder woman made her cry nearly so much as that first one had. Moria, to her credit, did nothing but listen as Teelina poured out her soul. When at last the redhead had finished, the elder Dereskian sighed softly, caressing her hair gently.

"Do you feel better?" she asked, holding the Sorceress at arm's length so she could look at her face.

Teelina nodded slowly. "Yes," she whispered, and then sighed.

A long moment of silence fell over them.

"Moria?" she asked after a long moment, one final doubt lingering on her mind.

The elder woman's voice was a little rough from the hours of disuse. "Yes?" she questioned.

A small sigh escaped the Sorceress as she regarded her older counterpart slowly. "Why are we doing this? Having this... relationship, I mean? What is the point of us being here... together now? There is no hope for us in the long run."

Moria nodded and sighed softly. "I wondered when we would come to this. You doubt the reasoning of our being together?"

"I just want to know whether you think this can possibly end somewhere other than in tragedy," the Sorceress replied frankly.

The elder woman regarded her for a silent moment. "Honestly? It can't." The redhead nodded slowly, turning away as Moria continued. "We fight for two different reasons, ordinarily on two different sides. No matter what we do, love, we cannot keep those sides from clashing."

"Then why bother being together?" Grayskull's guardian asked, her expression hurt. "If there is no point, why should we hurt ourselves more than we have to?"

Caressing her face gently, Moria leaned a little closer, staring into the younger woman's eyes. "Because, te lynïa, I want to. I am more content with you, talking to you, listening to you, even looking at you, than I have been in seven and a half centuries." The Sorceress smiled softly, but did not meet her gaze. "Teelina, look at me," the elder woman commanded, and the redhead did so. Moria took her chin between her fingers and smiled gently. "Despite all of your doubts, love..." she asked gently. "Was there ever a moment last night, or this morning, or even just now, when you regretted what you and I had done?"

"...No," the Sorceress whispered, her eyes locked with Moria's.

Smiling gently, the elder woman released her chin slowly, drawing her pale and slender fingers over Teelina's cheek as she did so. "Then that is all that matters, my dear. Come here," she requested gently, smiling when the younger woman slid next to her on the bed. Moria wrapped her arms around her, the redhead's back pressed against her chest. The white-haired woman lifted her fingers and gently smoothed the younger woman's hair. "Te lynïa..." the Dereskian Queen exhaled silently, her lips close to the Sorceress' ear. "Let us let Time wait, hmm? I'll not linger in the past, and you... don't wonder or question the future," she smiled gently as Teelina closed her eyes and sank backwards into her embrace. "We have tonight, love," Moria continued. "Tonight, and tomorrow, and the day after. Does anything else really matter?"

The Sorceress let out a small sigh of pleasure at being held and opened her eyes. "For tonight? ...No," she admitted quietly.

"Alright then," Moria commented, smiling as she caressed the younger woman's cheek. "This is what we have together. The past does not matter, and the future does not affect us here. We have tonight, and tonight is now, te lynïa. Let us make the most of it," she whispered into her ear, nibbling on it affectionately before trailing kisses down her neck.

A small moan escaped the redhead's lips as she leaned into the elder woman. "How is it you always know..." she breathed out quietly as Moria slid her way down her neck, "...exactly what to do and say to make me want you?"

The elder woman laughed as she spun Teelina in her arms, bringing her mouth upon hers and leaving it there until they had to pause for air. "Call it a gift, love," Moria replied softly, and then talking became overrated.

Teelina let herself be consumed by passion, forgetting the question the future, and Moria fell into her own movements and flurries of emotion, not bothering to remember the past.

As for the dream the younger woman had witnessed, for that moment, at least, it was forgotten.