Kendall found, waking up that morning, that he quite enjoyed waking up beside his boyfriend. It was refreshing so early in the morning to roll over and see the cute brunette sleeping beside him. Just the sight of him provided the blond with such a sense of calm and he couldn't think of a better way to start off his day. A smile tugged at his lips as they boy beside him stirred softly. He reached over, letting his fingers brush a few pieces of hair from his face.
"Morning babe," he murmured softly, leaning over to press his lips to the other's cheek, The only answer he got was an extremely quiet moan right before the brunette was covering his mouth and running over to the bathroom.
Kendall cringed and rolled out of himself, grabbing a can of 7up from the kitchen before joining the other boy in the bathroom.
He knew there was nothing he could do and it wasn't exactly his fault but Kendall felt extremely bad every morning James woke up with morning sickness. Sometimes it was only five minutes that he spent throwing up but other times it was closer to an hour. He rarely ate in the mornings, having aversions to most foods. Kendall had stopped wearing cologne because that set off James' nausea.
He crouched down beside the kneeling brunette, slipping his fingers under his tanktop, rubbing circles on the small of his back. He set the 7up on the counter and used his other hand to brush the hair out of James' face as he continued to empty whatever was left in his stomach. This session had only lasted fifteen minutes, a relatively short time compared to other mornings. He handed James the 7up, watching him take small sips of it.
Kendall ran his fingers through James' hair, offering a small, sympathetic smile. The other boy looked absolutely miserable. He pressed his lips to James' forehead, resisting the strong urge to apologize. He felt bad being excited about this when James clearly did not echo the sentiment.
Kendall stood up then bent over, hooking his arm under James' legs to scoop him up, carrying him back to their bedroom. His heart fluttered the way James held onto him, his head dropping down to rest on the blond's shoulder.
"What time is it?" James murmured against Kendall's neck.
"Just before eight," he answered, gently setting the brunette down on their bed.
"Can we watch cartoons before we go to school?" James requested, voice soft and meek. The way James was looking up at him with those wide hazel eyes made it impossible for Kendall to say no. Kendall swore James could get away with murder by just flashing those puppy dogs eyes.
"Sure," he replied, walking over to the dresser they both shared. They didn't really bother to separate their clothes out. They were just about the same size and shared a lot of thing being boyfriends. Plus James insisted it really helped out Kendall's fashion choices. "But let's get dressed first. What do you want to wear today?"
James just shrugged, not possessing the effort to care about his appearance, which was a first in many, many years. "Doesn't matter."
At least that was until he saw what Kendall had picked out for him. He grabbed the shirt from Kendall, chucking it in their hamper. "I can't wear that!" he exclaimed, playfully exaggerating his discontent. "I have a reputation to uphold!"
Kendall seemed to pick up on James' playfulness and chuckled, wrapping his arms around his waist. He laughed along with James, relishing in the happiness he seemed to possess. It was a complete 180 from his complete misery just minutes earlier but Kendall didn't mind. As long as James was happy, he was too.
He could only hope that this good mood James was suddenly in would last. He kept his arms tight around his boyfriend's waist, as if to hold onto the happy moment. Pressing his lips to James' forehead, he murmured softly against his warm skin. "Love you."
James' eyes fluttered shut at the contact, his cheeks staining a light pink. "Love you too," he returned, hazel eyes opening to meet emerald ones.
He broke away from the other boy, walking over to their dresser, pulling out an appropriately matching shirt. After pulling it on, he grabbed Kendall's hand gently and walked them out to the living room.
They assumed their usual cuddle positions on the couch, James resting against Kendall, head on his shoulder. After sitting in silence for a few minutes, mindlessly watching the cartoons on the screen, James couldn't help the way his worries and fears were creeping back up on him.
Things seemed perfect on the surface but there was more to it. Every little detail they had to figure out was piling up and starting to drown him. He settled closer to Kendall, trying to trust the blond enough to keep him afloat.
Then suddenly, he recalled yet another obstacle he would have to face. He groaned and buried his face in the other's neck. "We have to tell Coach today."
Kendall instantly picked up the reluctance in his boyfriend's voice and wished there was something he could do to put him at ease. He reached his hand up and ran his fingers through his soft hair.
"Just skip practice today," he advised gently, "We'll tell him on Monday."
"Kendy, I've already missed two practices this week," he whined, "I can't miss another without explanation."
"I'll tell him you weren't up for it and we can deal with it later." He pressed his lips to James' temple, hoping that answer was sufficient. James once again rested his head on Kendall's shoulder, wishing he could apply this frame of mind to everything in their lives and just deal with it all later.
By the time school was done and they were home, James was so far past exhausted. He felt like he could get a good eight hours of sleep and still be tired. Then there was the nausea that was apparently no longer limited to the mornings, him running straight to the bathroom in the middle of history class being a prime example. This had caused quite a few suspecting stares but he didn't bother explaining. Carlos and Logan shot him knowing, sympathetic stares when he returned.
He wondered if they had told Kendall about this incident. It was obvious they had when Kendall and him met for lunch and the blond practically suffocated him with questions. Throwing away his lunch probably didn't help the worry evident in his eyes. He just didn't want to risk it by eating something then having to throw it up an hour later. He explained this logic to his boyfriend who nodded, seemingly understanding his reasoning but James could still see hints of apprehension flickering in Kendall's eyes. To remedy this, he promised he would eat something at dinner that night.
He knew how it would inevitably turn out but he just couldn't stand the almost scared look on Kendall's face. Considering how his external state scared the other boy, he couldn't imagine how terrified he would be if he knew how he was feeling on the inside. Reluctant didn't even begin to cover it.
This was going to change his whole life and ruin everything he had been working for. Kendall didn't realize this. He could still play hockey; he could still follow his dream. Even though hockey wasn't his life dream, he still loved playing it and would miss not being able to. He would also miss out on any chance to go to LA and live out his dream. He was stuck now, bound to Minnesota and this baby. James just couldn't find a positive point in any of this.
James just wanted to crawl into bed and wake up in the morning, realizing this was all a dream. He knew that wasn't going to happen though. No matter how little he wanted to accept it, this was reality and he had to deal with it the best he could.
Despite his promise to Kendall, he skipped dinner that night, insisting he wasn't the least bit hungry. Kendall had tried to insist; that he was eating for two now and he had to eat something. James cringed as Kendall brought their baby up again. Not that James could honestly forget about it in the first place. He had flashed his boyfriend his best puppy dog eyes and softly confessed that he just wanted to lay down. Defenseless to his puppy dog eyes, Kendall finally relented, reluctantly letting his boyfriend skip dinner and go up to their room instead.
The blond boy had finished his own dinner in a record time, quickly thanking his mom for the meal before rushing up to his room. He saw that James had already changed into his pajamas of choice, one of Kendall's old hockey jerseys and a pair of black boxer briefs. Kendall let his eyes trail up James' long, muscular legs, smiling as his eyes landed on the other boy's stomach. He still had a hard time believing there was a baby in there, a human life that they created. It was amazing; he just wished that James could see that too.
After pulling his shirt off and changing into a pair of his favorite pj pants, he climbed into bed behind his boyfriend, settling on his side. He laid his body flush against James', draping an arm over his waist. Pressing his lips to the back of James' neck, he whispered how much he loved the other boy and how everything was going to be fine. James pretended to be asleep so he wouldn't have to confess how little he believed that.
Kendall was the first one up that morning, stirring softly behind the other boy. His hand had dropped down to rest on James' bare thigh, lightly scratching his nails over the soft skin. This caused the brunette to stir, stretching his arms up with a yawn. He blushed when he realized this caused the hockey jersey he wore to ride up slightly, exposing a sliver of his stomach. He tugged it back down shyly, turning over to face the other boy.
A small smile tugged at his lips as Kendall slipped a hand under the jersey, rubbing circles over his back. James' eyes slipped shut once again, burying his head in the other's chest. He thought that if he didn't move, the usual morning nausea wouldn't wash over him like it typically did. He wanted to enjoy this moment of serenity as long as he could.
Morning," Kendall murmured gently, pressing his lips to James' forehead.
"Morning," the pretty boy returned, rolling his head back onto Kendall's shoulder so he could stare up at his boyfriend.
Kendall smiled as their eyes met and leaned down, pressing their lips together in a soft, sweet kiss. James made a soft murmur of approval as they pulled apart. Kendall stroked his thumb across James' soft, rosy cheek, admiring green eyes meeting sweet hazel ones.
"So what're we doing today?" James asked quietly, reaching up to run his fingers through his boyfriend's shaggy blond hair.
Kendall smiled softly at this action, leaning forward to place another kiss to James' forehead. "I was thinking Carlos and Logan could come over and he could all hang out today."
James nodded slowly, "Sounds good," he muttered, lips turning up in a small smile. He groaned suddenly, hiding his face in the crook of Kendall's neck. "Kendy, I don't wanna move."
"Aww, babe," he cooed, smoothing James' hair back, then toying with the hair on the back of his neck. "You have to get up some time today."
"I know," he whined reluctantly, "I just don't want to get nauseous when I stand up." A brief moment of silence fell between them before James was looking up at Kendall with wide, pleading eyes. "We should stay in our pjs all day."
"I totally agree," Kendall exclaimed with a grin, pressing one last kiss to James' cheek before rolling out of bed. "But you should probably put on some pants though."
James slowly sat up, his lips jutting out a pout. "You don't really want me to put on pants, do you?"
Kendall turned back to look at James with a dumbfounded expression, appreciating his sudden lack of bashfulness. Ever since James found out he was one month pregnant a few days ago, he'd been extremely conscious about his body, never letting Kendall see him naked, shying away from all of his tight clothes. So this moment of open pride on James' part surprised Kendall, to say the least.
"Not particularly," the blond said, a smirk making its way onto his lips. The way James was biting his bottom lip was slowly driving him crazy. A predatory gleam in his eyes, Kendall stalked back towards the bed, crawling up from the foot of the bed. He glanced up at the other boy as he began trailing kisses up his legs, starting at the ankles and making his way up towards his thighs.
James made a soft noise in the back of his throat, his body squirming slightly under his boyfriend's touch. Kendall pushed the jersey up a little, placing a sweet kiss to each hip before moving to kiss his stomach. Before he could though, James was pushing the jersey back down, his expression fading to an unsure one.
The blonde's face, in turn, softened, settling down beside the other boy, kissing his shoulder. Sure, he was a little disappointed that these actions hadn't led to what he was secretly hoping for. But at the same time, he didn't want James to feel uncomfortable (even if James was far too beautiful to be uncomfortable with his body).
"Want to go try and eat some breakfast?" Kendall asked casually.
"Sure," James replied, shrugging softly.
Kendall smiled knowingly, "Want me to carry you?"
"Yes please," the brunette requested sweetly.
An hour later found the two in the living room, James curled up on the couch while Kendall answered the door. It was the first day in a while that he was actually able to eat and hold something down. It had only been a piece of toast and a few bites of scrambled eggs but it was something and that's all that mattered. James swore that Kendall had looked so thrilled, he thought the blond would surely explode.
James rested his head against a pillow on the couch's armrest, watching as Kendall let their other two friends in. Logan approached the couch and held out a bag to him. James peeked inside briefly before glancing up at his friend questioningly.
"All the grease and salt in potato chips is supposed to help settle your stomach," he explained.
"I can get behind that," James said enthusiastically, popping open a bag of the chips. Kendall smiled, happy to hear James enthusiastic to eat something.
"Me too!" Carlos exclaimed, diving forward and grabbing a handful of the chips.
"Carlos, you're not pregnant," Logan informed him.
"So?" Carlos questioned through a mouth full of chips, crumbs falling from his mouth as he spoke. The other three boys just rolled their eyes at the other's typical behavior.
The rest of the day passed just like that, just like every other day the friends spent together. They watched the hockey game, yelling and screaming at the players on the screen. They'd polished off three bags of potato chips, most of which was Carlos and James' doing.
It felt so normal and perfect and that's what depressed James the most. He thought of how much fun these days were, how much he loved just watching out with his friends, being a normal teen. This, in turn, made him think about how he'd never get to have these days again. Once they had this baby, their whole lives would change. They would no longer get to act like teenagers. They would be parents and James was absolutely terrified by the idea.