A Lovey Dovey Chapter

Skyler yelled, "Okay ladies and gents! Welcome back to the show! I'm-"

"Annoying," muttered the jerk.

"Man… why do you keep coming back to life?"

"Why did you call us 'gents'? It's gentlemen! Gents could be short for anything else, baka."

Skyler took deep breaths, "Okay, calm down. Maybe if you ignore him he'll go away. Anyways! Sorry about the long wait!"

"You better be sorry! You're wasting my time after a long break, which was uncalled for since we paid good money to see this!"

"He's just a figment of your imagination calm down… anyways! Let's start this show! Let's let Creed out of his chamber while we move onto the first dare! Train! I dare you to kiss Sven on the lips!"

Train, Sven, Creed, and a whole bunch of rabid fangirls yelled, "WHAT!"

"You heard me. Go do it, Train."

Creed swung out his sword, "There won't be anything to kiss if I cut off that smoker's lips."

He lunged forward and prepared to strike. Train jumped in the way and kneed him in the nose. "Shut up homo!"

The LGBT Movement yelled, "Hey! We don't want to include that guy in our movement!"

Train looked at them and bowed, "Whoops, sorry about that. I guess nobody wants to be part of anything involving that guy. Anyways, I just have to do this. Sorry, Sven."

Sven gritted his teeth and closed his eyes. Skyler yelled, "Aww, that was so sweet! You can almost sense the love between these two, with Train beating Creed up just so he can kiss his love! It's a perfect ending to a good movie, but we have more dares to do so we can't end this yet! Let's move onto the next dare! Train! Put on a catwoman costume and let Creed take pictures of you!"

Train widened his eyes, "What the hell? I thought you hated this guy! Why would you let him have something that satisfies his sick obsession!"

"Don't blame me- it was a dare." Skyler whispered, "Don't worry, I'll let you rip the pictures after he's done taking pictures."

Train sighed, "Thank goodness."

He started doing sexy poses for Creed, including bending over and other moves from a Playboy Magazine. "Seriously Train, maybe you should consider working for a pron site. You'll get lots of money. Those girls are shooting blood from their noses everywhere."

Train blushed, "Shut up! Anyways…"

He dashed to Creed to grab the pictures, but Creed smiled, "I knew you would be doing that Train, but I won't let you rip my precious."

He ran away giggling like a schoolgirl. Doctor adjusted his glasses, "Did he always laugh like a schoolgirl when he was supposed to give an evil cackle?"

Everyone nodded. Tearju replied, "If you rewatch the entire anime, you'll see that he's more of a horny schoolgirl than a villain."

"Hey," yelled the Sailor Scouts.

"Sorry, schoolgirls. I didn't mean to classify him in your category."

Magneto, the Injustice Gang, Kobra, the Brotherhood, Death Eaters, and every other evil person objected, "What about us!"

"Yea… sorry, he shouldn't have been considered a villain either."

Creed screamed as Gollum jumped on his head, "My precious! We wants the precious! Give Gollum his precious!"

Creed retorted, "No! It's my precious! My previous! Creed needs his previous!"

He ran around the room, and fell down a hole filled with magma located behind the jerk. Both of them yelling, "Precious!"

The jerk turned around, "What the hell? When was this put here?"

Skyler whistled, "I don't know what you're talking about. It's not like I loosened the bolts on your chair and was waiting for you to fall asleep so you'd accidently fall back into the hole."

Creed reappeared with the pictures burned, crying. Skyler smirked, "Alright, your turn is over. Stay there and shut up."

Creed laughed, "It's fine. I still have pictures of Train in those awesome poses. My best camera is my memory. Tee hee."

Train pulled out Hades and shot him in the head. Everyone widened their eyes. Skyler calmly drank his tea, "Not that I care, but I thought you weren't going to kill anyone anymore. Creed pushes the limit of being considered a person, but just curious."

Train replied, "Nah, I just shot him in the part of his head where he remembers stuff. Now, I've erased those memories from him."

Eve wrinkled her nose, "That's a catwoman costume? That hardly looks like a cat. It looks more like a leopard that jumped into a tar pit."

Skyler raised his eyebrows, "Okay. So what does a real cat costume look like?"

Eve walked up to Train and put on fluffy white cat ears on Train and walked behind him. Train adjusted the ears, "Uhh, princess, there's no way I'm wearing this- yeowch! What did you do that for?"

Eve poked a cat tail on Train's butt. Train rubbed his behind, "You poked a needle up my-"

Skyler interrupted, "That's perfect! While wearing that, your next dare is to go and beg Creed for milk!"

"Hell no! I ain't begging for nothing from that guy!"

"Do it while he's unconscious…"

"I wouldn't even do it if he was dead!"

Jenos, dressed as a dog, ran up to Train, "Woof! Woof woof!"

Skyler held Jenos back by a collar, "Do it before I sick my dog on you!"

Sephiria scoffed, "Do you think Train's that stu-"

Train screamed in a shrilly voice, "Alright! Keep your dog on your leash! I'll do it! Meow."

Belze smacked his forehead. Train crawled up to Creed, "Meow. Meow meow meow meow meeooowww. Meow meow. Meow meow meeeoowww."

Leon coughed, "Does anyone understand him?"

Jenos gave a cocky smile, "Am I the only one that understands him? I'm not surprised, only I'm skilled enough to understand the feline language. He's saying, 'Creed? Creed sama? Yo, jackass! Gimme some milk.'"

Rinslet turned away, "I can't believe I like this idiot. That's not something to be proud of."

Skyler shook his finger, "Nuh uh, that's not begging."

"I told you to give me some milk! Am I gonna have to shoot you to gimme what I want?"

An hour later… Train was kneeling before Creed, "Give me some milk already! My throat is parched! I'm going to rip off your mom's balls and feed them to you, you sick ugly bastard!"

Skyler sighed, "I think you're the sicko. Let's move on. Alright Train, tell Eve how you feel about her."

Train gave a small cough, "Eve, meow meow, meow meow meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow. Meow meow."

Eve clutched her chest, "Aww. Train, I love you too."

Sven yelled, "What did you say to her you pedophile?"

Skyler yelled with the same loudness, "Yea! Did he say twerp or brat anywhere in there?"

Eve turned her hair into a bunch of huge hammers. She turned around and growled, "You're ruining a sentimental moment between me and Train."

She smashed Skyler over and over, letting out all the rage that she felt ever since Chapter 2. Skyler wheezed, "Okay, next… Sven, go kiss Train."

"WHAT? We already kissed today! I think Skyler needs to go to the hospital to check his head."

"Hey! There's nothing in my head!"

Jerk nodded, "He's got that right."

Skyler growled and walked up to him. "You think that's funny? Funny? No, THIS IS SKYLER!"

As Skyler lifted his feet to kick the jerk, the jerk pushed Skyler slightly, sending him rolling down the stairs and back onto the stage. "Itai! Lucky shot. Sven, earlier Train kissed you. Now you have to kiss him."

Sven gulped, "Oh man… I hope I don't gag."

He closed his eyes and leaned over to Train and kissed what appeared to be a soft skin. He pulled back, opened his eyes, and yelled, "Train! Don't drag this out any longer than it should-"

He widened his eyes, "DID YOU JUST MAKE ME KISS YOUR BUTT?"

Train pulled up his pants and fell over laughing. "Ahahaha! You kissed my butt! Who's the pedo now?"

Sven growled and chased Train, "Let me kiss you on the lips so we can get this over with!"

Train screamed and ran away, "No! Leave me alone! I don't want to kiss an old man! I don't swing that way! Your breath smells like smoke, cocaine, and weed! No means no!"

"Let me kiss you on the lips already! I don't want this anymore than you do!"

Skyler turned away, "Nobody ever said anything about kissing on the lips. Okay, Eve, I dare you to trade all your books for this huge book."

He held in front of him a book huger than a door and wider than a car. Eve widened her mouth and eyes, "Give it to me."

Skyler snickered, "Here you go."

Eve opened the book to find profane pictures drawn by a child, including a picture of the letter C and its reflection and another of the number 8, the letter D and an equal sign. Skyler fell on the floor laughing, "Ahahahah! You should've seen the look on-"

Eve smashed the book over Skyler and kept using it as a Skyler-swatter. "Okay! Okay! Stop it! Jeez! You can't take a joke can you? Creed, I want to ask you a question that's probably been on everyone's mind. How did you come to be obsessed with Train? I'm pretty sure you were born a jackass, but where did this obsession start?"

Creed coughed blood out of his mouth, still recovering from the head shot, "Well, that's easy. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was in the locker room when I saw a boy around my age come back from a mission. It was a glorious sight. He was covered in blood, but there was not a scratch on him. It was clearly from the blood of other people he killed, and his marvelous eyes were still full of hatred and murderous intent. Then he stripped off his shirt and his physique was so marvelous. Blood still dripped from his shoulders down to his waist. When he pulled off the rest of his clothes, his body was still bloody from his victims, so bloody that his tighty white-"

BANG! Train had shot Creed in the head again. "Damnit… I forgot about him spying on me all those years I was in Chronos. Damn pervert."

Rinslet hugged Jenos's head. Damn, Train is scary when he's mad. Saya walked up to Train and hugged him, "It's all part of the past now Train. Don't worry."

He wrapped his arms around her, "Yea."

Tears flowed from Skyler's eyes, "Aww, everyone who has a lover, go hug them. This is too cute."

Sven walked up to Eve and was about to wrap his arms around her when Leon blew him away, "Go find someone else pedo!"

Sven growled, "Fine!"

He walked over to Tearju. "WTF!"

Doctor smirked, "Tearju does not want a homo erectus like you."

Sven walked over to Sephiria, who pointed her sword at him, "You better stay back if you know what's good for you."

Sven sniffled and walked over to a corner. Kyoko, meanwhile was tied to the ground too, "Let me go! Let me go hug Kuro-sama!"

Skyler smiled, "And that concludes our show for today! I'm going to step outside the building for a bit while the girls flock around me. Send us more dares! Until next time!"