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Yugi awoke in a desperate pant for breath, feeling sweat over his forehead he took a moment to recollect himself from the dream he'd had. Never before had he dreamt something like that. He couldn't even believe his mind had gone as far as that.
When his breath eventually returned to normal, he laid back in bed and attempted to get to sleep again. He laid there for possibly minutes on end before groaning quietly. Now sleep was impossible. He was practically wide awake. He couldn't believe all because of one dream he couldn't get to sleep again, but what the dream had been about was what was keeping him awake. The images kept coming into his mind and he had to try his best to push them away. That was the first dream he'd ever had about Kaiba, and hopefully it would be the last.
Never before had his mind betrayed him like that, it had never been so immoral, so naughty. He knew that even though how badly he wanted to push those images away, they would forever stay locked up in his mind. Yugi couldn't believe that he had gone so far as that, he felt almost sick to his stomach.
Unable to control tears welling in his eyes, they fell silently before a breath hitched in his throat. He quickly covered his mouth before he made another sound, not wanting to wake either Mokuba or Kaiba. Especially not Kaiba.
Yugi moved to get up and exit the tent, not able to be in there any longer at the feeling of suffocation. Once outside, the chilly nighttime air hit him but he ignored it. Yugi had no idea where he was going but he ran, ran away from the tent, the camp, until he was following some kind of trail in the dead of night. The only light source was the large luminous moon above him that cast shadows over the trees and rocks, if he wasn't so upset he would have been scared. Right now the last thing on his mind were bears or wolves, he just had to get away. He had felt suddenly so claustrophobic in the tent, he had felt like he was going to suffocate.
He didn't even know why he was crying exactly, it wasn't because of the dream. The dream had only emphasized how horrible he was for even dreaming something like that. Yugi felt why he was crying was because something finally sunk into him while he had been trying to sleep. The fact that it was near impossible that Kaiba would ever like him, or even care about him. He had been jealous of Atem, that he was able to talk with Seth so freely while Yugi sat in silence when ever near the CEO. He almost hated himself for it.
He could never find the nerve to ever have a real conversation with him, and it would never happen. Forever he would have this pathetic crush on Kaiba, Yugi bet that if Kaiba even knew about his crush, he would agree. He thought Yugi was stupid anyways, especially after tripping over that rock and being forced to carry him. The only reason he had done it was because of Atem, if he hadn't been there then Kaiba probably would have just left him on the ground.
More tears streaked down his face as he ran faster. Why couldn't he be like Atem? Why was he so pathetic? Kaiba would never like him, no one would ever like him more than a friend. He couldn't believe he had even told Atem he liked Kaiba, he should have just kept it to himself. He realize how stupid it really was. Nothing would ever happen between them. Why would he stress, worry, and drive himself crazy about it?
Kaiba was completely untouchable. You couldn't even say hi to him without getting a glare and having your head almost bit off. Yugi wasn't going to waste anymore time trying to get Kaiba to like him, it was a pointless task that would only drive him insane. He could never get Kaiba to like him, that would be like trying to get a cat and mouse to get along. Some things just weren't possible, and this was one of them. There was no point in even trying, he would never get anywhere. Trying to get along with Kaiba just wasn't possible, Yugi bet even Mokuba had a hard time getting along with his brother.
When Yugi stopped he found himself at the waterfall he had visited before. He gazed at it for a long moment before approaching the shore. He sat down on one of the rocks closest to the shore and gazed down at the water. His tears fell from his eyes and landed in the water below, making very small ripples. At this moment he felt so alone, he felt like he would always feel like this, that he would always be this pathetic, that he would wake up in the middle of the night just to cry.
This had to be his life, what he would do the rest of his life. No one would ever like him more than a friend, it just wasn't possible. He wasn't anything like any of his friends, they all were way more confident than him, even Ryou was and he was almost as shy as him. Yugi never realized that he had felt this strongly about this, during the day he must have just been hiding it, and now that he was alone he could let it go. This must have just been building up inside of him, waiting to burst.
Maybe he should just go back to being Kaiba's rival, that was the only thing that the CEO would ever see him as anyways. To him they were always rivals, and noting more. Was that the way Yugi was supposed to think too? Was he supposed to hate Kaiba just as much as Kaiba hated him?
What if he didn't want that? What if he wanted to love him instead? What if he wanted to be able to tell everyone that he loved Kaiba, not, nor ever hated him. He had always loved him. Why couldn't Kaiba ever say the same thing? Why couldn't he like Yugi the same way? Why did there always have to be a stupid rivalry between them? Why did Kaiba really hate him, or did he just hate the world? What had Yugi done to him that had caused this? All because he won a duel?
Yugi reached down and let his hand dip into the water, letting the chilly feeling travel up his skin and give him goose bumps. Through the refection of the water he could see the bright moon, and he could see himself. He could see a worthless boy with bright amethyst eyes filled with tears, he would ask why he was crying but remembered that worthless boy was him. Yugi only splashed the refection away as he stood up.
His purple orbs strayed up to the moon. He tried to wipe away his tears with his sleeve, but they kept flowing out of his eyes.
When a sudden breeze blew in from behind him he wrapped his arms around himself and closed his eyes.
He hadn't been expecting to feel another pair of arms wrapping around him. Yugi's eyes snapped open instantly, he turned to gaze at the blue eyed brunette now before him. Yugi stared up at him with disbelief. Was this another dream? It had to be because Kaiba would never do this. Yugi looked away from him, his breath hitching again as tears dripped to the ground from his eyes. He felt so ashamed, even if this wasn't a dream. How could he let Kaiba see him cry? How pathetic.
"W-Why are you here?" Yugi managed to murmur. His voice broken like it was as fragile as his heart. He didn't want Kaiba here, he didn't want the cruel CEO to see him cry. He was going to only insult him, Yugi could feel it coming. This was the perfect opportunity to humiliate him even further, how could someone like Kaiba resist?
Kaiba stayed silent. He only seemed to watch the tears spill from the small boys eyes before speaking. "I could ask you the same thing."
Yugi shook his head. Unable to answer him. Why would Kaiba care? He didn't understand why he was here and why he was holding onto him. Yugi didn't know whether to push him away or fight against it. He felt like Kaiba was going to set him up for some horrible trick that would leave him even more useless.
"I could also ask you why your crying." Kaiba took Yugi's chin to force him to look up at him with his large, tear burdened eyes.
Yugi purposely avoided his question. After Kaiba seeing him cry, he was about to tell him why he was crying. Even if it was because of the CEO before him. "Did you f-follow me here…?"
Kaiba's eyes narrowed, he moved his other hand from being wrapped around Yugi. Wiping away some tears that he small boy was still shedding. "Possibly. I heard you earlier, It sounded like you were crying and I wasn't sure. When I looked for you, I saw you were gone and went to find you." Kaiba's grip on his chin tightened. "I didn't follow you here for nothing, now tell me why your crying." he practically demanded.
Yugi looked on to him. Why should he tell him? it wouldn't matter, it wouldn't change anything. Kaiba didn't care about him, Yugi didn't understand why he was even here and asking him such a question. Yugi only shook his head. He couldn't tell him.
"Tell me." Kaiba growled. He used both of his hands to hold Yugi's cheeks so that he couldn't look away.
Yugi stared up into his eyes, seeing nothing but anger. The younger closed his eyes, feeling his tears roll past his closed eye lids. He remained silent which only seemed to aggravate Kaiba.
"Damn it Yugi, tell me." Demanded the icy blue eyed brunette.
Yugi shuttered under the pressure of Kaiba. He couldn't take his constant want to know when he didn't care at all. Yugi opened his eyes but began pushing him away, hitting his arms and thrashing around. "Stop it!" he cried. Eventually hitting his arm hard enough, Kaiba let go and Yugi ran. He didn't know where he was going but he had to get away from Kaiba. Yugi wiped at his eyes viciously so that he could even see where he was going. He ran around the small lake the waterfall had produced, going to where the jagged rocks were underneath the waterfall. He quickly jumped over the gap, if he wouldn't have made it he would have landed in the freezing water.
Yugi had to make two more jumps before he reached more jagged rocks close together. He was just small enough to squeeze through, but Kaiba would never be able to fit if he was following him. Past the rocks Yugi continued to run, he was now in a sort of cave behind the waterfall, stalagmites and stalactites covering the ground and high up ceiling of the moist cave. The stalactites had water dripping from them slowly, creating puddles of water that Yugi splashed in as he ran.
Having no idea where this cave went he still followed it. He couldn't stop in fear of Kaiba catching him. Yugi didn't understand why Kaiba had wanted to know so bad, but the pressure he was putting on him to answer had become too much. He couldn't take it, so running was his only other option.
Yugi did have a feeling as to why Kaiba wanted to know though, he had a feeling that once he found out he would mock him and insult him. The things he was best at. Yugi hadn't been about to tell him why he was in tears, to him it would have been stupid, it wouldn't of made sense. Because the cold hearted Kaiba had no feelings, he could never understand why someone was crying. The only reason he would want to know was so that he could make fun of you for it later.
Suddenly stubbing his toe on a rock he fell forward and landed on the cave ground with a tearful cry. The pain traveled throughout his body starting from his toe, then his foot, his legs, stomach, chest, head, and lastly his heart. Hearing far off the sound of breaking rocks didn't come to his ear's, the only thing he heard were his cries of sorrow and pain. Eventually Yugi curled up and laid on the damp cave floor. Crying to himself, not sure what else to do right now.
When he heard footsteps come closer to him, he didn't move a muscle, he knew who it was, but he couldn't run this time, his body wouldn't let him.
Kaiba kneeled down next to Yugi and stared at him. "Yugi?"
Yugi wiped at his eyes before gazing up at Kaiba. Why had he even followed him? And how?
"Are you going to answer me now?" Kaiba asked harshly.
Slowly, Yugi sat up, leaning on his arm for support. He felt completely wet but that didn't matter. Yugi's eyes only filled with more tears at seeing the annoyance, the anger. Why did he have to look at him like that? Why couldn't he ever look worried even. That was better than this. "W-Why do you even want t-to know? You don't care about me… I could tell by the way you barely let me stay in the same tent, like I had some kind of disease you didn't want to get…"
Kaiba glared to himself. "I didn't… I didn't mean what I said to you then."
Yugi almost believed him for a moment. "You sure sounded convincing to me… I don't understand why you hate me so much Kaiba, what did I ever do to make you hate me?" Tears collected in the younger's eyes. "What ever I did… I'm sorry…"
Kaiba suddenly reached out. Taking Yugi's chin in a firm grip. "Don't apologize to me. Yugi, I don't hate you. I never have."
"You act like you do! You glare at me all the time and insult me… how else am I supposed to take that?" Cried the boy. Trying to break from the grip over him. He didn't understand why Kaiba was saying these things, they weren't true. He did hate him.
Kaiba then let go of Yugi chin to stand and look away from him. Yugi gazed at him, he crossed his arms and glared off, until eventually sighing, eventually giving in.
"I'm sick of this stupid charade, ever since I met you I convinced myself that I hated you. We are rivals, and that's how it should be. I wanted to hate you for everything that you were, everything that I wasn't…" Kaiba lowered his head and closed his eyes while he spoke. "Every day I regretted, every day I woke up I hated myself more for being the cruel person I am to you. I… hated you for making me hate myself. I never truly hated you, I only told myself I did, to keep away these… feelings… the feelings I had ridded myself of long ago. I soon realized that they were too strong to just get rid of, I had to live with them, and I… tried to turn those feelings into hate for you… instead of what they were…"
Yugi gazed at him for a moment before asking."Kaiba… is… is that really all true?" hesitantly standing up after speaking. He almost couldn't believe everything he said. Had he really felt that way this whole time? Had he really not hated him? Had he really regretted being so cruel to him? His words had sounded so honest, Yugi had never heard Kaiba speak like that before, it was as if he finally let all of the defense's down, like he was opening up to Yugi. He almost expected him to start laughing and say he couldn't believe that Yugi thought what he said was true.
The CEO opened his eyes to glance at Yugi. "Yes, it's all true. I don't care if you don't believe me." he then turned away. Seeming to regret speaking. "I don't even know why I told you that… it's incredibly personal." Kaiba then began walking away.
Yugi watched Kaiba for a moment before running after him. Grabbing him by the arm gently to stop him. "Wait, Kaiba."
Kaiba stopped. "What?"
"I…" at suddenly feeling a loss for words he sighed. What Kaiba had told him had been so deep and meaningful. He'd never heard him say things like that, and Yugi couldn't let him walk away thinking he didn't believe him. "I… I believed everything you said."
Kaiba turned his head to gaze at Yugi over his shoulder. Their eyes stayed connected before Kaiba pulled his arm out of the grip on it, and continued walking away. Leaving Yugi to stand and stare off at him. Wondering what this meant for them, what was their relationship now?
