AN: I SWEAR, THIS IS THE MOST CRACK-FILLED ONE-SHOT OF THEM ALL.
IT'S THE MOST CRACK-FILLED ONE-SHOT I'VE WRITTEN, EVER.
It's also the largest one I've written so far, for this! It was really close to being 2000 words long!
I won't even bother putting on here about who's in it. I'm pretty sure that at least 3/4ths of everyone that has a bio in Chapter 2 is mentioned by name.
Why the hell is this so cracky? The answer is simple:
Quantum Physics- Alright, I'm sure that no one will ever believe that answer. ( Not even fans of Black Adventures :U )
This whole crazy idea came to me when I was trying to go to sleep, around 1 am today. I couldn't sleep, from how nervous I was, since I had to go to school later that morning. It started out with the line that Lettie yells at the beginning, and just went on from there. :/
I couldn't wake up to go type it down, though, because if my mom caught me she'd be SO PISSED.
Anyway, enough of my ramblings! ENJOY!
Lettie was practically frothing at the mouth. She slightly choked on her own spit, and then yelled out, "I'M SO FURIOUS THAT I AM PRATICALLY DROWNING IN MY ANGER!"
She was practically seeing red.
No, not from the floating red hearts that were around her and the boy she was yelling at, or the red aura from all the sexual tension.
She was seeing red because she was angry, dammit!
Geeze, you guys need to get your heads out of the gutters!
She kept on cussing out the boy in front of her, and he was actually started talking back at her. Taro almost never did this, so he must have been extremely pissed this time.
Josh was just looking on at the scene and trying to play the peacemaker. "Guys, guys! Calm down! Why can't we all just be happy and get along?"
"Shut up, Josh!" snapped Lettie at her cabin mate, her head momentarily whipping around to send Josh a fierce glare.
Josh visibly flinched, and slowly backed away to let them continue.
…
"Hey, you want a cookie?" asked the girl from Bidoof Cabin who had an adventurous skitty. She had gone to stand next to Josh, who felt helpless watching as his cabin counselor went at it with the cool-headed Lucario counselor.
"Um, sure," said Josh. Jessie held out the tin of cookies at him, and he took one.
With just one bite, his eyes widened and shined brilliantly. "Oh my Arceus, these are amazing!" he exclaimed. As he did so, a rainbow left from his mouth and splattered all over the ground.
"Really?" exclaimed the girl, excited at the prospect of someone liking her own recipe.
"Yeah! They taste like pure rainbows!" Joshua blurted out, and began to wave about his arms happily, his arms lengthening and seemingly becoming very wavy and incredibly flexible.
"Yay!" Jessie cheered, waving about her arms as well, in the same impossible-like fashion that Josh somehow pulled off. Her tin of cookies was floating in the space that she had been holding onto them previously.
…
Then came the camp owner, Jason, to the scene. His secretary, Penelope, followed him, as usual.
"It's party time!" he suddenly yelled out. He placed a boom box on the floor and pressed the play button. Latino club music started playing, and he began to dance in place, shaking his ass around.
Penelope was very embarrassed, and face palmed at Jason's idiocy. "Goddamit, Jason!" But when he didn't cease the dancing, she just looked at him with a stern look in place.
"Damn, he has a fine piece of ass." She involuntarily thought, looking as Jason's booty went up and down in a rhythmic fashion.
…
Mrs. Pith had been watching both Jason and the secretary come into the scene from a ways away. Her eyes narrowed into slits as she saw Penelope examining Jason's ass.
That was her fine piece of ass.
The old woman came from behind and slapped Penelope in the head with a fish.
"What in the-?" exclaimed Penelope, but was cut short.
"He's MINE! Stop looking at him like that!" Mrs. Pith shrieked. She growled, lunging at Penelope with a swordfish that had suddenly appeared in her hands.
Penelope backed away and managed to dodge, and then held up her own swordfish.
The two women began to exchange blows of the long snouts of the unique fish, sword fighting.
…
As the epic-ness suddenly appeared, the fight with Lettie and Taro was escalating quickly as well. They were shouting at each other, mere inches away from each other's face. A crowd was starting to gather a bit farther off.
…
"Woahhhh, this punch is awesome!" 'Steven' said, hiccupping. She had downed 8 cups already, and was getting to the point of giggling uncontrollably for no reason.
Of course, somehow there was a punch table at this gathering, for some odd reason. But that didn't seem to matter.
"Wait, are you drunk, Mal?" asked Avery, shocked. He had only half a cup of punch, and was having a strange feeling that the punch must have been spiked. It had a strange tang to it, and Mallory was looking VERY tipsy.
"Hehehe, you're FUNNY," said Mallory, lightly swatting Avery's shoulder.
"Come on, Mal, snap out of it," said Avery, quietly, taking the girl's shoulders, trying to steady her.
"You're so cute," Mallory said dizzily, and grabbed his head in her hands.
"What?" Avery asked, in shock.
And then Mallory started to make out with him.
No one seemed to notice, since much was going on.
…
A bit of a dance circle had formed. One of the campers (Trick…) stole Jason's boom box and started playing some COOLER music.
They started playing some Pitbul. They seemed to be the best jams to have to prove your dancing skills.
Raven Castiel, who not many campers thought would laugh in front of others, much less actually doing something like dancing, was currently popping, locking, and busting out moves in the middle of the circle as if he was born for it.
…
Jason was still shaking his ass, not noticing the epic sword fight behind him that was started for the very thing that he was shaking without a care in the world.
…
A group of campers were either watching the dancing ring, the sword fight, or something else entirely.
It looks like Lettie's and Taro's fight ending out with them making out passionately.
…
Jessie was feeding other people her awesome rainbow home baked cookies.
…
The trainer's Pokémon, bored of the humans having fun, were ALSO doing something. A Pokémon from the Lucario cabin started a conga line of sorts, with most of the Pokémon of Lucario cabin joining in, and even a small few from the other cabins.
…
Neither woman was giving in an inch. They would not allow the other to win.
Their fight was becoming as awesome as one from an anime.
…
A ton of stuff was going on.
And then something else ridiculous happened, catching everyone else's attention.
It even stopped Penelope and Pith's fight and all the making out that seemed to be happening.
It was because of Mari. She somehow got a whole dang stage in place and ready, and had also somehow assembled a DJ station, with turntables, amps, and everything. She even had a cool hat and shirt on!
She started to play some very familiar build-up music. Well, familiar at least for Yuki-Rin.
"Yo yo yo! This is DJ Mari here! I'd like all ya'lls attention to the center stage, please! I'd like to introduce ya'll to some fine people, who're gonna put on a bit of a routine tonight! Come on out, boys!"
And out came Hydro Pump and Sunny Day in drag.
…
"Hey, wassup guys?" asked Hydro. All he got were incredulous stares and open mouths.
Sunny just looked like he wanted to kill himself, and he was extremely red in the face.
…
"Dammit, Hydro!" thought Kazuma, scowling. "You ruined one of the best times of my life!"
It was true. While in the dancing circle, him and Yuki-Rin were enjoying themselves immensely.
Yuki-Rin was enjoying herself so much, that she had actually started to grind on Kazuma.
A lot of sparks were starting to fly.
That is, before everything was put to a halt.
"This was my goddamn chance!" Kazuma thought, outraged.
It probably WAS one of the easiest times to nab the girl he liked.
Well, tough luck, Kazuma.
…
"Hit it, Mari!" said Hydro. At just the right time, the music shifted.
"I hope all you ladies out here will 'fly away' with us," he said, winking sexily out at the crowd.
"Why THE FUCK do these things always happen to me?" blurted out an angered Sunny Day.
"Just do the routine!" Hydro retorted back.
And then they started to do their routine, dancing on the stripper poles on the stage.
…
Trick 's mouth was gaping, and her eyes were practically popping out of their sockets.
Without knowing, she was starting to drool.
And when SUNNY ACTUALLY STARTED STRIPPING her nose started to gush out blood.
"Holy FUCK, that's hot," she thought as she stared, transfixed at the Day that seemed to shine brilliantly with every action.
…
Francine was in the front row, looking up at the stage, watching it all.
"My babies look so wonderful," she barely managed to whisper out, tears coming to her eyes.
Oh, this was all just too much for her!
Since the minute Hydro came to her to ask to design the costumes, she knew that he would be able to pull it off splendidly.
He and Sunny made her so proud.
…
"SHOW US YOUR TITS!" yelled out Jason.
Drool was slipping out of the corner of his mouth, falling slowly down the edge of his chin.
He was somehow sounding tipsy without even drinking anything.
That was probably just the effect that boys who could pull off drag splendidly and begin to strip had on people.
…
And soon enough the routine was over.
There were a lot of cheers and applause.
There were even some requests for an encore.
…
Watching everything transpire, from on top of the mountain cliff, which was conveniently just over the area of where all this occurred, was a gallade.
It had on Native American clothes, face paint, the cool feather hat thing, and was smoking a joint.
There was even some Native American sounding music playing from nowhere.
The gallade, feeling the presence of the reader, slowly turned it's head and stared.
... ... - - ... ...
Nathan jolted out of his sleep.
He stared around his surroundings. He was in bed in his private counselor cabin.
"Oh, god, it was only just a nightmare," he said, and sighed, slowly laying back down on his pillow.
"Mhm?" someone mumbled sleepily beside him.
Nathan whipped his head around so fast that he got a crick in his neck.
There, beside him, in his bed, seemingly naked, was Francine. She was rubbing her eyes, looking at Nathan.
"What was only just a dream? You mean the sex?" she questioned, looking curiously at the man next to her in bed.
Nathan quickly scrambled back, and he soon fell over the side of his bed, his naked body hitting the floor.
... ... - - ... ...
"Huh?" mumbled a small statured blonde-haired girl, her dark, brown eyes snapping open. She raised her head from her pillow, and then sat up.
"Well, then… That was really bizarre," she said, cocking her head slightly.
She then shrugged, not thinking much of it.
After all, her narcolepsy at times tended to make her have very peculiar dreams.
Very peculiar ones, indeed.
She then got up to start the day- ah, evening.
…Well, at least this time she had actually managed to fall asleep in a bed.
Who was the strange blonde girl at the end? No one may ever know :U...*shot*
Alright, no one but myself and immabeemee. Hehehe...:33c