Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect, or any of its characters, though I wish I could. They belong to Bioware and EA. Any other characters are mine unless stated otherwise. All songs and quotes are credited to their respected owners. I make no money with this Fanfiction. It's just my imagination gone crazy.

Special Note: So I was doing another playthrough and this time with a modded character on my xbox, which was btw really fun and made it so easy after the first five times on Insanity, and I went full paragon (full renegade but prefer paragon) which made me fuck over Zaeed. I saved the workers and let Vido get away. Anyways I was thinking that I could use that hatred he had for her at the beginning because of it in this chapter. I basically got him first out of everyone and did his loyalty mission second to last, and since he pissed me off in the game I never went to go speak with him afterwards until much later. So here goes nothing. Finally and heart to heart, well fist to face rather, with Zaeed Massani. It's a two part(er). Hope I did it justice, if not, I tried. Eh. Still no beta, my update time would probably piss my beta off so I'm not asking for once unless you wouldn't mind. Check out the new poll on my profile. Teehee!

Word Count: 2,959

(Feron: )

Soft snoring came from the cots in Life support. Generally drell did not require a huge amount of sleep, but in the last two years one rainbow colored drell did not receive a simple nights rest. He really needed all he could get. The hum of the drive core pulsed behind the dimmed glass to provide them little, next to no light. A light sheen of sweat began to form on the scales of his brow. His breathing began to quicken and he his fist began to clench tightly. Another nightmare. This time, it was shadows. He could hear voices, but could not place them. He could see figures but could not distinguish one from another. The electricity they forcefully tortured him with messed up the memories but the pain was unforgettable. His body felt clammy, his nerves shot, he could feel the aching dull and twitch of his muscles even through his sleep. Bolting up and clutching at his chest, he felt all the air leave his lungs. His eyes were darting every which way. At first he did not know where he was, his eyes where clouded and no matter how many times he closed his eyes, he could not clear them. Coughing roughly into his tight closed fist, he tried to breath; even the smallest quick breath would alleviate the burning pain he felt in his heart and lungs now. Shivering, he felt a rumbling purr to his right. It was a calming affect native to his people that would stop the crying of the young and would settle the nerves. He felt like he needed comfort, though he would never in his life admit it. Not to a male, and especially to his rival. He wanted to keep his pride at least intact. Closing his secondary eyelids, he looked now to the assassin or rather the outlined shape he assumed was the assassin. Being who he is, he knew that all the tossing and turning, the small yelps and harsh breathing would wake him. He was a light sleeper and drell being able to hear better than some species didn't help. He had to be though in his line of profession. He could not hear the question that was thrown his way, but he knew it was one of concern. He nodded curtly to the older drell, his senior by 10 years and looked away in shame. He couldn't help it. He felt weak. He knew he was safe, but his memories would always bring him back to the pain and humiliation. Eidetic memory was a curse and a gift all the same.

Hearing the ping above on the speakers EDI's terminal came to life and spoke. It sounded muddy to his ear canals, like he had water in his ears, or somewhat akin to the sound of rain hitting the domes that surrounded Kajhe's district populated with drell of all colors and age. Apparently, she had asked if he needed medical assistance, or even if the AI should alert the Commander. When heard the word Commander, though muddy still it stuck out and was clearer than other words, he shook his head vigorously. He would not bother her. He would get through this. He did not want to seem weak in front of her of all people. His breath though short and much needed, finally calmed him enough to fully awaken. He would no longer sleep, it hurt and even though his dreams that where more memories than anything, he needed to busy himself to forget, even for a second which for them was impossible. Thane for the most part, did not go near him but stood close enough to give his comfort. He was grateful for the sentiment, even though it wasn't much he would rather not be more coddled like a child than he already was with the crew constant looks of sympathy. Standing from his cot, he shakily moved towards the compartments that housed his clothing, books, and other assortments and picked up the freshly cleaned uniform he usually adorned. They had ordered them many, and the Commander had them shipped to the Normandy since they had been too busy to land anywhere and do that. The white and red garment contrasting with his rainbow scales, his frills and his eyes. He liked the color though. At least he could tell it was red. It wasn't dark and even though he had the treatment to his eyes to assist the hanar, an honor to his people, he could still perceive the pigment.

Changing quickly, he bid a quick farewell to his rival, and thanked him in a quiet whisper he knew the other heard and left through the Life Support doors. He needed some time to think. It was late, and the night crew was small so not many would roam the halls or stations often. He summoned the elevator, and tapped his foot in a nervous gesture. Damn thing was slow. They could advance in medicine, weapons, tech, biotics but they could not make the elevators run any quicker? It's not like the mechanics of it where difficult. He guessed now, in the future, some things where still overlooked and primitive. Oh well. Finally stepping into the elevator, he pressed the button to ascend down to the Cargo Bay. He could possibly work out, and get the nervous twitch that his scaled brow seemed to be stuck in to stop.

He was there for a few hours. No one disturbed him and for that he was grateful. He had worked out all the nervousness he felt since awakening, and he felt like he could start fresh. He would have to request to EDI and the Commander that they needed a new punching bag, though. Sighing, he watched the sand trickle down onto the metallic floor in wonder. His mind went blank and for once, he was at peace with no memories. He did not know how long he stood there, just watching and letting his eyes roam the now empty bag, but when he heard shouting it brought him out of his muse. His shoulder shook a bit. The memory of the mercs that tortured him wanting to come forth to the front of his mind, but he shook it off roughly before it had a chance to manifest and looked in the direction the shouting came from. He saw a flash of blue, biotics, and then more shouting. He heard thumps, he could not place them. He was too far away but he suspected it was punches. Sighing, he wondered if he should go and see if anyone needed assistance, but then it was none of his business, so he wasn't sure. He was about to go back to his quarters, but when he heard a feminine screech that sounded like the Commander's he stopped, and his body shook. Shit, now he had to go, especially after he heard the huge thump of a fist landing on someone's jaw and the crack of bones. He just hoped it wasn't her that was down and out or he would have to kill whoever it was that she was fighting. He would defend his Siha.

(Aleana: )

At first, when the day had started, she had been in a rather good mood. Missions where down to one mission, and reports where limited to at least ten. She would be done early, and maybe she could finally get some sleep for once without nightmares. She had black rings under her eyes, and even though Cerberus had made her youthful and possibly unable to get as many wrinkles as her age and profession should have given her, she was beginning to think she looked her age, even older. Taking a quick shower, she dressed in her Commander attire, and smoothed out the wrinkles of the uniform. She had to make her runs soon; to visit the crew was the only thing that made her happy. She didn't do well on her own. She hated being shut in for weeks or days as they traveled through star systems. She was getting cabin fever. As she rode the elevator down to the mess hall, she smelled bacon, eggs, toast with butter and pancakes. She was having a real good day.

After stuffing her face and feeling like she felt she weighed as much as Grunt, she went to each individual. Jacob was insisting they have shore leave and get piss drunk. They didn't have time after the suicide mission since she needed to get the Shadow Broker's information to Liara, and her crew needed a break. In fact, she in the middle of his rant had remembered one thing she forgot to do, Zaeed. Though his dossier came late from the Illusive Man, she needed all the help she could get. They had picked him up, found out about Vido, and then headed that way. It took a week to arrive, but in that time she felt a friendship being born. She loved hearing stories about his escapades. The mercs he killed and how he did it. She even convinced him to allow her to hold Jessie. She was rather beautiful. She would have been jealous if she was still functional but sadly it wasn't the case.

After arriving, sadly everything changed. She had taken Garrus for backup, and the three set off to spill a little merc blood. It was a running joke with Garrus and she loved that Turian like a brother, she was even a bit attractive to him. The three had sat down a day before they left and revised a plan for when they went ground side. Zaeed didn't speak a word the whole time, she wondered at the time, but let it go when she assumed it was nerves or excitement. She should have known, she should have questioned but she didn't. When they were fighting their way through to kill Vido, and finally arrived, he shot blinding and hit valves that allowed gas to escape. His damn revenged cost them lives. They could have died in the process of his stupidity. She had punched him, yelled in his face. She wanted to beat the living daylights out of him, but then they would be a person short and she needed the man power to pull through this merc infested place. When they were about to enter another section, a man ran out and yelled for help. The whole place was coming up in smoke and it smelled like burning flesh. Zaeed had gotten in her face and told her they had no time. They had to kill Vido, but she refused. Zaeed could suck a Krogan's quad if he wanted, she was running the show, and lives were at stake. Fighting her way through flames of death, blisters from the heat, and painful pipes that gave way with pressure and smacked right into her sides she activated the emergency valves and finally contained it. She was relieved, though she'd bet money she would never grow nose hairs again, side burns and would have to cut the singed parts of her hair but relieved. Unfortunately they had missed Vido, and he left them in the dust. Zaeed for his part was pissed beyond all belief, and he yelled and cussed and threatened her life, but she refused acknowledge him. Something exploded near them, and flew with quick speed, it hurt Zaeed. She took her pistol, and was completely ready to shot him in the head and make sure he was permanently dead but she couldn't. She poured her heart out and told him she saw him as a friend. He betrayed her trust, and hated him at that moment but she promised to help him, no matter what it took after the mission. Once he agreed, she helped him and then everything was awkward. It had been two months after their fight if she counted correctly. She had refused to speak even now, after the Suicide Mission which he only got a curt nod and Shadow Broker base which she didn't trust him on even after Liara had taken charge and all that was not too long ago. Maybe two weeks.

After Mordin's rant about the pieces of Collectors and the base he was analyzing, Kasumi taking about the things she had stolen, Thane and Feron's other gods and happy memories they shared in their youth and flirting she had no clue on since she could never fully read other species body language, especially one she hadn't associated with until Thane's dossier. Samara on her other children and bondmate, Legion on fixing his armor, Dr. Chakwas on Feron's condition and reports on others of the crew that where sick, she was damn tired and she hadn't even started yet. Garrus was too busy Calibrating, how original, Miranda with reports on whatever the fuck she did, Jack was fighting with Grunt in the mess hall over the stench of his food so she couldn't disturb them and Tali was near the drive core with Gabby and Ken. All she had was Zaeed now. She wasn't looking forward to it.

She decided to take him on the mission to kill some Blue Suns. It was his favorite choice of missions and maybe she was wrong and it was a mistake but she knew she had to break the ice somehow. Zaeed once again drove her to want to strangle him. He had taken off instead of staying with her and Legion, and compromised the mission. He had interrogated a young merc on where Vido was, and even though he truly did not know, he kept getting pummeled with the butt of Zaeed's rifle and would not let up. She was furious when she arrived, and he just grinned and shrugged. When they returned, she left him alone for hours. She wanted to calm down so she wouldn't do anything stupid. Finally, in the dead of night when she knew he was awake and no one was around, she went down to his hold. She almost got a blade rammed into the side of her head as he threw it and she stepped in a second after. He laughed, and he said he should have waited a moment before throwing it and it would have made its mark. She let that go. It wasn't worth it. Even her friends wanted to kill her once in their lives. Sighing, she began to talk to him. She again poured her heart out for him, well perhaps not poured but at least tried to get her point out. She wanted him to shape up, and be a part of a team. What she did not know until it was too late was that he had a stash of whiskey or rum somewhere, and he was shit faced drunk. He had cussed her out. Yelled at her like a child that didn't get a toy he wanted and when he raised a pistol to her she snapped. Quick as lightning her biotics flared and she tossed him across to the glass covering the garbage shoot. Luckily it was enforced so it didn't crack much but it would need repairs and quick. She tried to apologize afterwards but then she tackled her to the ground and they wrestled. She punched, and kicked, biotically pushed him away to talk some sense into her but he would not listen and yelled to her throat was sore. It was all so damn quick. He kept trying to attack her. She knew they were making too much noise, and someone would hear, but she didn't know who. She landed a hard right hook to his jaw and broke the bone. Breathing harshly, she crawled back onto the opposite wall across where he was now unconsciously laying by and rubbed at her temples. She felt a migraine, and she felt sick. She was going to throw up. She never had to beat a crew member like this least of all a friend. The most she had done was hurt them in a spar but it wasn't much and usually by accident. She was too attached now in these times where they could die at any minute due to the Reapers. Dry heaving, she did not hear the swish of the door, but when she felt a caring hand rub her back and hold her hair as she attempted to let lose what was in her stomach she started to calm. EDI activated her holoframe and told her she had sent security along with both doctors to make sure she hadn't killed him. Standing up, she grunted lightly from the strain of the day. Her muscles ached from the mission and now after this she needed rest. She looked towards her support and though tears from dry heaving made her eyes fuzzy she could see rainbow colored skin, or rather scales, Feron. Pushing her pride, she wrapped her arms around his middle to his back and held him close, burying her face in his chest to hid her blush. She felt him stiffen, then relax and hold her back. A deep purring shaking her body slightly in a very comfortable way, it even almost made her giggle. She was Commander Shepard, she did not giggle. The doctors came soon after that and transported him to the med-bay leaving them both alone. She couldn't speak. She wouldn't. All she wanted right now was to feel his cool scales and whatever he was doing with his voice or body. She didn't have a clue. Maybe they could speak later, she'd have to check on Zaeed as well, but for now this was enough.