Miles away, Severus Snape felt a searing pain in his chest. It jolted him where he sat, in a faded green armchair. A half full bottle of elf made wine sat on a spindly table about a foot away. He had been just about to take a drink when the pain hit him.
The wine spilled on his black robes as he started, his glass falling to the floor, putting a hand to his beating heart. Something was wrong. He knew it.
It only lasted for a minute, but this pain was something different. It went deeper than he could describe. Breathing heavily, he retrieved his wine glass from the floor, muttered "Scourgify!" at the puddle on the floor and it evaporated.
What could have caused that pain?
It was gone now, but left him feeling somehow even worse than before the pain had hit him. He had been apprehensive for months. He knew the Dark Lord was planning on finding the Potters, obsessed with it even, but as far as Snape knew, they had not been found. Surely tonight was no different. Surely, The Dark Lord was still unaware of the Potters' whereabouts. He shuddered. Lily Potter….that surname sent ripples of rage through his body. Lily Potter….the woman he loved. He had not yet dared to see her since the day of her wedding. He knew she didn't want him….him of all people. What was he next to James "perfect" Potter? Nothing. And that bothered him more than anything else in the world.
He had kept track of her of course. Sent her a few letters. She had answered politely, but it never satisfied his longing to see her. Being the Dark lord's spy was dangerous, and he did not want Lily Evans to ever meet up with him. That is why he had been cautious in communicating with her. He had dropped subtle hints as to where she and James should move next, now that they knew He was after them. Dumbledore was keeping them well protected. That much Severus could count on, but he, himself was in The Dark Lord's circle. He heard things. He knew things. And with every letter, he stressed the importance of not staying in one place for too long.
He had received a letter from Lily about a month after she got married saying all was well, and not to worry. She even asked him to come and see her…not them….her. James was not to be included in these little meetings. It was this that made him long for her even more. But he didn't dare. If The Dark Lord found out….
But being unable to see her did not stop him from keeping tabs on the Potters. A year after their marriage she wrote him and explained that she knew The Dark Lord was onto them, but she didn't know why. She was afraid, wanted to see him, but still he did not go. He dared not. He wrote back sympathetically, giving her advice where to run next. But the year passed, and they were running out of hiding places. She wrote him at one point announcing the birth of her baby…Harry Potter. This letter, Severus ripped to shreds. She produced a child with him. Potter.
She had even included a picture. A tiny, black haired baby. And he looked like James even as an infant. A sick, twisted, miserable portion of Severus' heart broke when he realized that he truly would have been happy to raise his own child with Lily Evans. Lily Snape…
But that was in the past. Her last letter informed him that the family was moving to Goderic's Hollow, as they needed a real house for their child's upbringing. No more hiding in basements, ratty apartments. A real home was needed.
That was the last he had heard of her.
Severus stood and walked to the grimy window of his small home. It was a chilly autumn night, Halloween. The sky was a deep navy blue, the moon slightly covered by wispy clouds. Really a lovely night.
He was just about to go upstairs and go to bed when his arm began to twinge. Then it seared with an acidic pain that seemed to scorch his whole left side. Rolling up the sleeve of his robes, Snape saw the black tattoo that had been branded into his skin. It was blacker than ever.
The Dark Lord was calling.
Snape looked at the dying fire in his grate, closed his eyes, and apparated.
When he opened them, he was standing in tall grass on the edge of a deep dark menacing looking forest. There was no one around that he could see. Looking around for some sign of life Snape saw a dark figure walking towards him. He grasped his wand in the pocket of his robes, alert.
The figure came closer, the shape of a man.
"Snape" came a course voice.
"Dolohov" he replied curtly.
There were several pops around them, and more figures were evaporating out of the air, circling up, all looking somber.
"What has happened?" asked a man on the right with a long black mustache. "Why have we been called? Where is the Dark Lord?"
"He's gone." Said a woman's voice. She sounded hoarse, devastated.
"I don't understand." Said a silky voice. "What do you mean, 'gone'?"
"He's gone, Malfoy." Said Macnair. "Last night he went to Goderic's Hollow."
Snape felt a chill run down his spine.
"You mean…the Potters?" he asked, trying to keep his voice calm.
"Oh yes." Sneered Bellatrix. "Yes they're dead. That much is certain. But something happened there! The Dark Lord is gone. He has not contacted any of us. We all felt the Mark burn!"
"It's like he's….dead." muttered Mulciber, rubbing his arm. "It feels different."
"Shut up!" hissed Bellatrix. "The Dark Lord cannot be dead…"
"Then where is he?" asked Malfoy, his lip curling. The others were looking scared.
There was another loud pop as a small round, timid looking man appeared, pale as a ghost.
"Pettigrew!" roared Mulciber, grabbing the man by the front of his robes. "What happened? Where have you been?" The man blanched.
"Th-the Dark Lord has fallen!" he whimpered. "Just been to Goderic's Hollow. Lily and James Potter…dead! But My Lord is nowhere to be seen! Their brat lives, but I couldn't get inside the house! There's some sort of enchantment up. I couldn't get in. I just heard the cries." Pettigrew pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and mopped his shining brow. "I-I had n-no idea something would go wrong. I t-told The Dark Lord everything I knew!"
"Don't flatter yourself, Pettigrew." Snapped Macnair. "The Dark lord must have had his reasons for…going…wherever he is…What think you, Dolohov?"
Dolohov shrugged, his eyes wandering from Death Eater to Death Eater.
"I say we wait!" said Bellatrix, her eyes wild, her chest heaving. "He called us! We have no right to leave!"
"He didn't call us, Bella." Said Malfoy in a clipped voice. Mulciber was right. It did feel different when the Mark burned. And as Macnair said…he must have had his reasons for disappearing…."
"So that's how it is, Lucious?" snapped Bellatrix. "You would walk away from him so easily?"
"Now, now, Bella." Said Malfoy, his voice icy. "I was merely calling attention to the fact that we are all standing out in the cold doing nothing. What would you have us do? "
Bellatrix looked malevolent, but said nothing.
"I say" said Snape, his voice cold. "The Dark Lord did not call us here. Something must have happened. I think we should return to wherever we were and wait for news. If The Dark Lord wants us, he has more than enough means of getting us. We are wasting our time here."
"What of the brat?" growled Dolohov.
"Not important. I'm sure the Order of the Pheonix will send one of their precious few to save it." Laughed Macnair.
"Until we meet again then." Said Malfoy, swinging his traveling cloak over his shoulders.
And one by one, they apparated, Snape to Goderic's Hollow.
He landed a short ways down a small lane. It was cozy looking, red and orange leaves upon the ground, and little lights in the small cottages the lined the streets. His heart was pounding. Every fiber of him was aching to know. To see for himself.
He walked quickly, shoving small children in costume out of the way as he went. Gathering speed, he rounded the bend and stopped dead.
There, behind a small fence was all that remained of a cottage. The roof the house was completely blasted through. The lawn scattered with bits and pieces of shingles and furniture. He opened the gate with violently trembling hands, and went up the path to where the door should have been. It had been blasted out and lay several feet inside the house.
Snape could feel himself shaking as he went over the threshold. The lights were still on. It was strange. The downstairs of the house looked as though it hadn't been touched if you discounted the door. There were embers still burning in the fireplace, and the clock on the wall chimed merrily nearly giving him a heart attack. Midnight.
He walked furthur in nearly tripping over something lying on the floor. He looked down and saw James Potter dead on the floor. His eyes were slightly open, a frightened look on his face. His glasses were knockd slightly aside. His wand lay on the coffee table in the center of the room. He hadn't even had a chance…
But it wasn't his old enemy that Snape was there to see.
He began to breathe faster as he climbed the stairs. Pettigrew had said that he could hear a baby crying from inside the house, but he could hear nothing. Then Severus remembered that Pettigrew had also said that there was some kind of enchantment upon the house so that he could not get in, but he himself had been able to get in just fine. This was, however, hardly the most important thing on his mind.
He was taking the steps two at a time now. The cold breeze from upstairs was making him tremble even more. There was a short hallway ahead leading to four rooms. One door was open. Severus' heart was pounding in his throat.
"The McKinnons were innocent people! With families! And he killed them!"
Her words tortured him with every step.
"I'm Lily Potter now."
He was reaching for the doorknob.
"We're best friends, Sev."
A strangled cry came from his throat when he looked inside.
There she lay.
Her beautiful red hair splayed around her, her eyes closed.
Her body had fallen sideways so she was slumped against a rocking chair.
She could have been sleeping.
Snape grabbed the doorway, breathing so hard he was afraid he would hyperventilate. He was being ripped open with the force of seeing her lying there, knowing she would never wake again, knowing she would never send him another letter again. His eyes were blurred by tears as he stumbled forward on his hands and knees towards her. Whimpering, he picked up her head and brushed back the red tresses that covered her cold face.
"Oh Lily….I would have saved you…"
Tears pouring from his eyes, he bent and kissed her forehead, cradling her head against his chest.
He didn't know how long he sobbed like that. It felt like hours as he replayed their last conversation in his head, their last kiss, how it was really his fault she was dead. He had gone to the Dark Lord…but he was supposed to spare her…he promised to spare her…
He lifted his head to the crib where the child was supposed to be. He could see nothing. Maybe the Dark Lord had taken the child with him.
Getting to his feet, and placing Lily's head gently on a pillow that had been knocked to the floor, Snape looked in the crib and gasped. There was a tiny dark haired child sleeping soundly. There were tear marks on the boy's cheeks so Severus assumed he had finally cried himself to sleep. The child appeared to be in perfect health except for a nasty looking cut on his forehead. It had bled a little, but seemed to be scabbing over now. The child looked so peaceful. How had it survived? Why would the Dark Lord kill Lily and James, but not the baby he had been seeking? It made Snape's blood boil to think of it.
Turning back to Lily, Snape eyed something lying on the floor next to her.
The tiny silver charm and chain he had given her. She had worn it…ever since. He picked it up held it, tears rolling down his hooked nose. She had cared. She had loved him. And now she was gone. Burying his face in her hair, inhaling her scent one last time, Snape thought of the child.
It couldn't stay here. The Death Eaters were laughing about the Order coming to pick it up, but they weren't there yet. What would happen when the child woke up? He would be hungry and scared..
For a second, Severus thought about taking the child with him. He reached a long thin finger into the crib and stroked the baby's jet black hair. The baby did not stir.
It was then that a blazing white light filled the room.
Snape jolted, ducked, and instinctively drew his wand. But the light did not return. Instead, he heard a low rumbling, like that of a gas engine.
Running over to the hole in the side of the house, Snape looked down onto the lawn to where the noise was coming from.
Dismounting a giant motor bike was the hugest person Snape had ever seen. He recognized him vaguely from somewhere as someone called Hagrid. Not wanting to be seen, Snape darted over to the crib. He heard monstrous footsteps on the stairs and knew he had to leave. Causing trouble or not, Snape had only just entered Dumbledore's service, and did not think it wise to let Hagrid see him, especially with the baby.
Pocketing the necklace and looking once more at Lily Potter's body, Snape apparated into the night.