Cat's POV

Silent words of love catch and hook in my throat as the knife tears deep into my skin. I done this before, but this time I'm going to throw myself off the edge without any attempt to save myself for tomorrow. My door is unlocked. It doesn't matter; my parents never care enough to check on me. I slash uneven gashes on my soft arms, and the red wells up and over quickly in a rising tide of red. My hand keeps the blade moving until I get an abrupt feeling of light-headiness and the weapon slips out of my fingers. My eyes barely register the pink carpet stained red before light-headiness to blackness and I feel myself slide to the floor.

I'm just scarcely aware of a faint beeping sound that seems to come from next to me. My arms feel numb and stiff - wait, why can I still feel? My fingers give a violent twitch and my eyes snap open.

"Oh, thank God, Cat; you're awake."

Tori...she's sitting next to me, one of my hands enclosed in both of hers. My faintly beating heart quivers at the realization of her touch. The bright lights in the room make me squint, but they'll adjust. Tori grabs me in a tight bearhug and if I could I would have returned the favor gladly to her. "Why would you do something like that?" A whimper grows in my throat as I realize that's she's on the brink of tears because of me.

"The note..."

"Oh, Cat, I read the goddamn note." I hear a sniffle, and my heart does another painful twist. Bandages encase both my arms, almost to the top of my shoulders. I painfully raise them to lay tenderly on her back. "We - we could have talked."

"I'm sorry." The raspy words are the only ones I can force out.

"Don't be; it's my fault."

"No," My voice is stronger than I thought it would be, but if anything this IS NOT Tori's fault. "No, it's not. You weren't the one holding the knife."

Her arms tighten around my ribs. "I could paid more attention, been less self-centered -"

"Stop it, Tori." I won't let her degrade herself because she feels sorry for me. "You're not self-centered; you're a good person."

"God, Cat. How can you say that? You almost killed yourself because of me."

"It was out of love." The fire leeches from my voice, leaving me small and vulnerable again.

"Cat..." She moves out of her chair and sits gingerly on the side of the bed, like she's afraid it will hurt me in some way.

"Who found me?" I ask, too quickly. I want to change the subject. I can tell Tori doesn't like it, but she obliges anyway.

"Jade. She said she noticed how you'd been acting and she was worried. She went upstairs to your room and she said -" Her voice breaks and she forces herself to go on. "She said she saw you lying there in a pool of blood - and you weren't moving." Tori's voice breaks into sobs. "She called 911 and told me you were in the hospital." A small candle of comfort lights in me. Jade cares, she always has. It's good to know you have a best friend, even if she isn't always there.

"Is she -"

"She's in the waiting room. So is everyone else." They...they cared enough to wait to see me? I voice the question aloud and Tori pull backs, tears running tracks down her bronze skin. "Of course they care, Cat. We all care. I care."

Her lips are trembling and desperate, but they still connect with mine anyway, and my heart seems to burst with happiness. My bandaged arms are too stiff to wrap around her neck, so they curl around her body along with my legs as our lips pick up a rhythm that we both glad go along with.

"Tori?" I speak with my lips touching hers, our foreheads resting against each other.

"Yeah, Cat?" Her melodic voice is hardly a murmer, light hands skimming over my body in this skimpy hospital gown. It's not a 'I want to have sex with you touch', not blind lust. It's caring and tentative, discovering something precious and my hands do the same with her.

"I love you."

"Yeah, I know, Cat. I know."