(Disclaimer: Don't own anything but the story)

Battle Weary.

Chapter Fifteen.

Jay was leaning back against Dean. She closed her eyes, Jesus…what had she been thinking? She sighed inwardly, she hadn't been thinking, that was the thing; she'd been hurting and she'd just wanted to forget. Forget what she'd read and forget what she'd lost. She sighed again and turned to Dean, he was smiling at her. Oh, great. She stood up and started picking up her clothes.

Dean shook his head, shit, what had he been thinking? He grinned, well he kinda knew, but…she'd been hurting and he knew that feeling, that feeling of loss, he'd just wanted her to forget for a while…and so had he. He smiled at the memory and then she'd pushed herself out of his arms and started picking up her clothes.

"Going somewhere?" he asked.

She turned to him "Look, that…we shouldn't have. I wasn't thinking straight and …and…" she was scanning the ground "where the hell is my other boot?" she looked around some more….there it was, on top of the car, how the hell had it got up there…oh, yeah. She tried not to smile as she grabbed it.

"I saw that" he grinned.

"Shut up" she slipped her t-shirt over her head and looked at him "Are you gonna get dressed or spend the rest of the day naked?" he grinned at her "Fortheloveofgod…" she muttered with a smile. She put her jeans on "Dean…"

He grinned "Okay, okay…" he got up, stretched and started to dress. "Jay…"

"Don't okay? I don't do the whole…post-sex thing very well. Sooo…you were great, you rocked my world, now let's just forget about it"

He laughed "I wasn't gonna say that but…" he grinned "of course and backatchya"

"Oh God…."

He grinned at her "Yeah, you said that a lot" he laughed "I saw that"

"I'm not smiling. Now what were you gonna say?" she bent to put her boots on "Stop looking at my arse"

He looked up from her ass "I…" he laughed and put his boots on "Okay" he bent and picked up the notebook as she turned around "We need to talk about this"

She shook her head "No. We don't"

"Yes. We do."

"No. I never want to see that book again"

"Jay…"

She shook her head "No" turned and walked away.

"JAY!"

"NO!" she took off at a jog.

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Dean walked back into the cabin and saw Sam and Gus sitting at the table steadily throwing back tequila. Sam turned when he heard the door open.

"Dude!" he grinned "Where've ya been?"

"Is Jay here?"

"Nope, haven't seen her…" he frowned "But I gotta talk to her. Man, do I have to talk to her"

Dean sat at the table, grabbed the tequila bottle and drank.

Sam grinned "Chug-a-lug, dude"

Dean smiled "You pissed, Sammy?"

He grinned "Uh huh" he threw back another shot then noticed the notebook in Dean's hand "Hey! I gotta read that" and he reached for it.

Dean pulled it out of his reach "No"

"No, dude. Seriously. I gotta read that. Zeke told me to" he laughed "He's a funny bastard…and big too. I mean…shit! You could build a whole damn city on his shoulders! And, and, and…you know he even speaks in code!" he giggled.

Dean looked at Gus and raised an eyebrow "What's he been smoking?"

Gus laughed "I don't know, Dean. He went and had a sleep…"

Sam shook his head "Noooo, a nap. Zeke told me to go and have a nap and then he came and spoke to me in a void that wasn't a void…hang on, no, it was a void but we were there but not and…" he frowned "it was real" he burped loudly. "'S'cuse me" he grinned.

Dean laughed, reached over and took the tequila from Sam's hand 'No more, Sammy. Now what the hell are you talking about?"

Sam stared at the tequila and sighed "Okay. Zeke came and spoke to me 'cause he said Jay was busy" he noticed Dean smile "Oh, dude…you didn't"

"Shut up. Now tell me what Zeke said"

"He said I had to read that" he pointed to the notebook "He also said…" he shook his head.

"What Sammy?"

"He said we can't…"

They looked up when the screen door opened and Jay walked in. She went straight to the bathroom, ignoring them. Sam got up, went to the bathroom door and knocked on it.

"Jay, its Sam. I gotta talk to you"

"I'm not in the mood" she said through the door.

"Jay, I'm serious. I have to talk to you. It's about Zeke" he stepped back when the door opened. He frowned "You've been crying". He turned to Dean "Damn, dude" he grinned at his brother "Are you that bad a lay?"

Jay knocked Sam on his arse and turned to Dean "You told them?!"

"Hey! You hit me!" said Sam from the ground.

"I didn't tell them…they …guessed" said Dean haltingly.

Sam grinned "He was smiling"

"Oh for fucks sake" she went to her bag and started throwing her stuff in. "You are unbelievable"

Dean stood "Where are you going?"

"Anywhere…somewhere as far away from here as possible"

"No. You stay here and we talk about this" he held the notebook up "Zeke left it for a reason, you've read it…"

She laughed "Yeah, I read it" she looked at him "Why would I want to read it again?"

"I need to read it" said Sam as he got up from the floor "Zeke said I had to"

Jay stopped her packing and turned to him "What did you say?"

"You heard me. Zeke said I have to read that book" said Sam.

"Are you trying to piss me off?"

"Noooo, but he said…"

"HE DIDN"T SAY! HE'S GONE! YOU HEAR ME? GONE! THE PRICK SENT HIMSELF TO HELL AND HE'S NOT COMING BACK!" her voice hitched on the last word.

"Jay…"

"Don't Dean! I know what I read! You do too! My brother is gonna spend eternity in Hell because of me! ME! YOU try living with that!"

"I AM LIVING WITH THAT!" he yelled. He shook his head and tried to calm down "Where do you think our Dad is? He may not be when Zeke is but he's where Zeke is! My dad made a deal with that yellow-eyed bastard to save me! So don't you start! I know exactly how you feel, okay!" they stared at each other.

"I still need to read that book" said Sam. Jay and Dean turned and glared at him "I do!"

Gus stood up "Okay, everyone needs to just calm down…"

"Shut the fuck up, Gus!" the three of them said in unison.

"I will NOT shut the fuck up!" He went and grabbed Jay, forcing her to sit at the table "Dean! Sam! Sit the fuck down or I will put my wooden leg up your asses!" he stared at them "I mean it!"

Dean and Sam mumbled all the way over to the table and sat down, Sam eyeing off the notebook in Dean's hand. Gus cleared the table of all the alcohol and sat down.

"Now talk" said Gus "I need to know what's going on"

Dean looked at Jay and she shook her head. He sighed "Okay. Zeke's car is here, well what's left of it. I found this" he held up the notebook "hidden in the chassis. It explains what's going on, not all of it I'm sure…but most of it" he looked at Sam "Dad wrote in it too"

"What's it say, dude?"

"It says that Dad and Zeke planned this. Not the whole demon thing, they knew that was happening so they put things in motion to make sure the three of us would be alright. Dad didn't screw Zeke, he helped him. Zeke wanted to go…well not wanted but…had to"

"He didn't have to"

"Yeah, Jay. He did" he looked at Sam "Sammy, the first time we did this, you….died. Jay wasn't here …so somehow…Zeke managed to set things right again, made sure Jay was here this time round."

"To give you the blood transfusion…for the healing" he said.

"Yeah and to make sure I was strong enough to protect you this time round. Zeke promised Dad that he'd make sure we were okay as long as we made sure Jay was okay. It didn't work the first time…so…look, I don't understand how he did it, but he did. The pact, the one Dad sent him, he wasn't supposed to use it until they came after us" he looked at Jay "but when Jay turned up unannounced…"

"I fucked him over"

"No" said Dean softly "you didn't fuck him over. He was going anyway, he just went earlier than he expected" he turned back to Sam "Zeke figured she'd come when he went missing, so we were supposed to make sure she got on a plane and went home. The deal was for Zeke to spend…to go to Hell and Jay would be left alone, but it didn't work out that way. Only…."

"Only what?" asked Sam.

"Only I think Zeke knew they wouldn't hold to it so that made him more determined to go. He can do shit, Sammy. I mean seriously scary shit with his mind and I'm not talking about bending spoons and making people think they're chickens"

"I know, dude. He came to see me" he looked at Jay "I know you're not gonna believe this, but it's true. He made me take a nap so he could speak to me. He said I had to read that notebook to understand. He said you and Dean knew Dad hadn't screwed him over and he said…" he sighed "he said to tell you he knows you didn't mean what you said and that he loves you"

"What else did he say?" she asked softly.

"That was pretty much it" he wasn't going to tell them what Zeke told him he had to do "He…you know he…shit. I'm sorry Jay, you can't get to him" she nodded "But you're gonna keep trying"

She nodded again "How can I not?"

He reached into his pocket "Here. I'm guessing this is for you" he held out his hand and she just stared at it.

"How did you get this?" she reached out and took it.

"Zeke gave it to me"

She stood up quickly and went to Gus' bookcase and started scanning the titles.

Dean looked at Sam "What was it, dude?"

"A necklace…but a weird-ass looking necklace. What else was in the notebook?"

"All about the healing…"

"Zeke said you heal as quickly as she does now"

Dean nodded "Yeah, he and Dad set that up. Zeke told him I'd use the pact. Zeke didn't know why and that worried him, but he told Dad I would need the transfusion, the healing would be a bonus, would help with the fight. He also knew I'd trade my soul but Zeke wrote that he had that all under control, didn't say how, but that he'd sort it out. Dad said we had to trust Zeke, that he knew what he was doing" he looked over at Jay, she was still searching for a book. He leaned in and whispered "I took out a page before she read it, she's up to something, it doesn't say what, he just warns her not to do it"

"So why the hell did you take it out?" whispered Sam.

"I had to! It explained what they were doing to him…or gonna do to him, shit, you know what I mean. I couldn't let her read that!"

"Why would he do that? He'd know it would upset her" said Sam incredulously.

"Because he said they'd do it to her if she did what she was planning. I think he was hoping to scare her. So you two have to stop her, whatever it is she's planning, you have to stop her. She's bound to do it when I'm fighting, so you stay here and you stop her"

Sam sat back in his chair…he couldn't be in two places at once. Oh, this was not good, not good at all.

Gus sat and listened, he closed his eyes, he had to try and tell them…tell them without him finding out. He continued his struggle.

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Lothar paced. What the heaven was going on? They'd captured the one called Zeke, killed the one called Sam, the brother had shot himself and they were going after the woman. All of it was going to plan and then…then they'd been told it had all been 'reset'. They had to go back and do it again. The man downstairs was not happy.

How in Satan's name had it been done? Even his 'sleeper' didn't understand it. But that wasn't working out quite as well as he'd hoped either. The 'sleeper' had said he'd been having some trouble, the old man was smart, he had to be careful in case he figured out he was there. He'd only been able to make small journeys into his mind. He said he didn't think the two hunters knew he was there, but they were smart as well, so he'd had to be on his guard. He'd been subtly steering them in the right direction, had made sure the one called Dean had used the right pact but had not understood how he'd survived that night he'd set the challenge. The blood loss alone should have killed him. He had no update on the whereabouts of the woman either… but as far as he knew the two men had never heard of her.

Lothar punched the wall, he couldn't risk going to the property, if his superiors found out what he'd done, how he'd broken the rules… He shook his head, he had to figure out who had reset this. It was his only chance at saving his own neck.

To be continued….