The story's finally picking up! Lots of development in this chapter, so its kind of long! And can I just say, your reviews are amazing? My usual reviewers (Jennie, Caitlyn, Isilady, etc-Sorry if I forgot anyone!) are so motivating. When I get their reviews for each chapter, I'm like Oh! I'm doing something right! It's like an internal calendar almost, when I get their reviews, I know its time to update. So they're pretty awesome. And everyone else, too! One person told me I should be an English teacher. WOW! Thanks to everyone for the overwhelming response. So enjoy!
Santana Madison had fun last night. Yes, indeed, she had lots and lots of fun. In fact, it was the most fun she could remember having ever since she became a model. It could maybe even be categorized as one of the "best nights of her life." But of course, all good things came to an end…temporarily. She woke up groggily, as she felt a ray of light warm her face. She opened her eyes and squinted at the sunshine coming from the windows across from her bed. That was weird; she never opened those curtains. She turned rolled over and her face collided with the leg of her now-lover (She could call him that now, right? Since they had sex and everything?). She could get used to this, waking up every morning with someone else beside her, especially when that person was Puck. It felt like her life had been given a jumpstart again, a change in her mundane routine of work, work, work.
"Morning, sunshine," he greeted. He was sitting upright, his back leaning against the headboard. He looked as if he was in the midst of deep thought.
"How long have you been sitting there?" she asked, sitting up and scooting back to join him. She rested her head on his shoulder, feeling the stickiness of dried sweat. She curled up and hugged her legs.
"I don't know, twenty minutes?" he said.
"Oh. Whatcha thinking about?" she asked.
"Nothing much," he said, although he had clearly been thinking about something important before she woke up.
"Is it about last night? Do you regret it?"
"No, and no. Like I said, it's nothing much."
"Really? You just had the most amazing sex, and you're thinking about 'nothing much'?" she nudged. Shit, why did she say that? Did she want him to think she was incapable of having a fabulous sex life without him? She didn't want to seem needy and attached already, and feed his bulging ego at the same time.
"Most amazing sex, huh? Is that what you're thinking about?" he teased. Yup, she would never hear the end of this.
"Oh, shut up," she said, punching him lightly in the stomach…God, those abs were amazing…."No really, what were you thinking about? I want to know, I'd like to think that I'm a part of your life now, so I honestly want to know what goes through that nonexistent brain of yours."
"Okay, I was thinking about my buddy Eddie, from the service," he said somberly. Oh, maybe she shouldn't have asked. There was her stupid foot getting in her mouth again. He hadn't been out of the military long, but Santana knew he didn't really like to talk about it.
"Yeah? You wanna talk about it?" she prodded. God, she sounded so pathetic.
"Would you look at that? A little bit of love and Santana Lopez turns into a chick with feelings and stuff," he announced. She knew he was changing the subject, but she ignored it because of the racing thoughts going through her mind. He said "love." He just described them as "love." Obviously he didn't mean it that way, he meant "lovin'" or "sex." Still, none of her justifications calmed her temporary hummingbird heartbeat.
"Yeah, yeah. I wanna hear all about him!" she said enthusiastically. She hadn't heard much about his friends, although she came home everyday with a story about how Katie "said the cutest newbie thing today."
"Well, today is the third anniversary of the day I saved his life," Puck started. She didn't know how to respond, but she was glad she didn't have to because he continued. "We were being attacked—are you sure you want to hear this?"
"Yes," she affirmed. Although she wasn't entirely sure she did. But if this was going to work out between the two of them, she needed to be a part of his life. No secrets. Wow, ironic much?
"And it was an ambush, practically. And I saw my two buddies, Hal and Eddie, get hit and go down," a little gasp escaped her lips, "Me and these guys, we were tight. So I ran back to grab them. And Hal just has a bullet in his leg, so he couldn't move. But Eddie? Man, he was looking pretty bad. So I tried to get them both, but I couldn't. So Hal told me—told me," he stopped. It was harder than he thought, talking about this. She rubbed little circles on his biceps, a sign of reassurance.
"To just take Ed, because he was going to bleed out and die right there on the battlefield. So I told Hal to sit tight, and I'd come back. I took Eddie out, left him with the medical unit, and I guess and saved his life," he finished, even though that wasn't really the end.
"And Hal?" she asked gently. Santana was an expert with intuition. She knew when anything was up. And the both of them were hardly open, sharing people. She would have to force it out of him.
"He, uhm, I went back, and I saw him get shot by another soldier, not one of ours of course. He didn't make it," he said, looking away. She let out another gasp. Of course, she knew he'd been a soldier, and she knew that soldiers went to war. And that in wars, bad things happened. But the actual implication of those statements hadn't hit her until now. War was serious shit, and it had happened to her man. He had saved another man, while he watched another be killed. It made all the petty shit that went on in her own high-strung life seem trivial.
"Oh my god," she said, repeating it slowly.
"I tried, I tried, San. I tried to get them both," he said stoically, masking his emotion.
"Oh, Puck. It's not your fault. You couldn't possibly have gotten all three of you guys out of there alive. You saved Eddie, right? That's something. Something really big, really heroic. You're a hero," she said, reaching up to give him a soft kiss.
"I'm not a hero, Santana. I'm just an army brat."
"That's heroic in itself," she urged.
"You know, people used to care so much more about war. Like in the World Wars or whatever, war was a nationwide effort. Everyone chipped in to support the troops. Now, no one gives a shit. They're all too busy with their everyday lives to realize there is a fucking war going on," he continued. He was really on a roll. He sounded so educated, so worldly. Nothing like the ignorant teenager that used to skip class for the hell of it. This was a topic he was passionate about, that he could really argue for.
"And those who do know, don't even know the half of it. They probably think it's just random guys running around with random guns. But it's not. The military is serious stuff. It's like genius technology, satellites and stuff," he went on. Wait, it wasn't? So it wasn't like Forrest Gump? She suddenly felt ashamed to be so ignorant of the world she lived in, but wasn't really a part of.
So instead she just said, "Yeah, I totally get it. Like people think modeling is looking pretty, but it's not. It's hard work to make a materialistic thing into an image, a fantasy." Actually, it was nothing like that. She sounded incredibly shallow. Bombs and bras? Uh, no. "Oh my god, I sound so stupid right now. I'm sorry if that was insensitive."
He laughed, "It was a little, but it's okay. I mean, just because you don't support the reason for the war doesn't mean you can't support the troops. Either way, people are fucking dying for you." The conversation the two of them were carrying was the most intellectual one they'd ever had and it left the both of them with a sense of accomplishment.
"Of course. I really don't want to go, but I have to. We're filming the television commercial today," she said, crawling out of bed begrudgingly. He pulled up back and initiated another kiss, which turned into an impromptu make-out session. She pulled away a little after, and said "Okay, I really need to get in the shower. What are you going to do today?"
He shrugged. "The same. Loiter around your place, look for incriminating dirt to sell to the paparazzi." She swatted him playfully.
"At that rate, maybe I won't come home for lunch after all," she bitched.
"Lunch, huh?" he suggested, wagging his eyebrows.
"Lunch," she said, just as suggestively, "Okay, gotta get up now." She stood up, and found herself wobbling, struggling to keep the balance between her legs. She shot him a accusatory look over her shoulder, and he just smirked. She could practically feel his ego swelling up like a balloon.
As she left, he actually wondered what he would do. He could count on a thank-you call from Eddie, an annual thing since he was discharged from the service. Instead, he just got up, and decided to start reading a book from Santana's vast collection. He had to sift through a couple racks of paperback romance novels before plucking a hardback copy of Spring Awakening. She'd once told him it was his kind of play, a long long time ago, back when they were different people. When she emerged from the bathroom fully dressed, she raised an eyebrow at the sight of Puck reading, but quickly slipped out the door as to not disturb him.
She got to work a little bit later than usual, and instead of the standard green screen, there was a full-on, decorated set. It was jungle-esque, with lush vines everywhere, but storm clouds on the backdrop. The entire setup looked tacky and distasteful. She almost preferred the scenes where they were just against a bland background (as to showcase their bodies, bras, and most importantly, boobs), making weird facial expressions to techno Eurotrash music.
"Girls, as you have noticed, we're taking a new creative direction this season. The bra, of course is called the Invincible, meaning that it really needs to be. So the theme is military," Daniel lauded, walking through the door.
"What?" Santana gaped. Was he serious?
"Picture this. The four of you girls, dressed in the safari, with nothing but the bra on of course, and a helmet. Then bullets come flying out of every which direction, and you all just strut off untouched. Santana, my little star baby, then at the end of the faux-runway, look into the camera, give one your demure stares, and say 'It's invincible.' Done! What do you girls think?" Daniel finished enthusiastically. He felt very proud of this concept.
Coral was texting, drinking a Master Cleanse shake through a straw, and managing to look bored at the same time. She shrugged, indifferent.
Sasha looked horrified. "That is the most politically incorrect, offensive thing I have ever heard, and I'm from the ghetto." It was true; Santana had been subject to many hateful, ignorant things as a result of Sue Sylvester's numerous over-the-top cheerleading routines and comments, but this one took the fucking cake. Daniel's blatant disrespect made her feel a little better about how stupid she sounded this morning, but she knew this was wrong on every level.
Katie was at a loss for words. Santana, however, never lost her voice.
"Are you an idiot? There's a fucking war going on! People are dying!" she hissed.
"What? Santana, that's the point. It's going to appeal to lonely army wives, to people who want to feel connected to the troops," Daniel said halfheartedly.
"So buying an indestructible bra is going to save a life? There's no way I'm saying that line," she snapped. She knew she was the star, but she couldn't just back out of the commercial. Plus, HQ would never change it completely; they were already in the final stages of the campaign.
"But you're the face of this bra!" Daniel protested. Santana sounded ridiculous, this was an amazing opportunity. A full-frontal camera shot, of her face!
"So let Coral do it. Like I said, there's no way I'm saying that. And just so you know, it's not really invincible. Ten minutes in last night, and it was already bent out of shape," Santana said, not backing down. Coral and Sasha snickered. Daniel sighed; he had worked with her long enough to know that she could be a stubborn bitch for as long as she needed, so he relented.
"Fine," he gave in. Coral finally looked up, her face lit up. They spent the next few hours, shooting the same scenes over and over, because Daniel claimed it didn't look authentic enough. No, really?
Meanwhile, Puck was at her apartment, still thumbing through Spring Awakening. This was racy shit, and he was only through Act II (He was a slow reader, okay?). But then he heard his cell phone buzz. He saw that is was Eddie, ready to thank him for saving his life again. A part of Puck was glad that he had friends to talk to still, but the other part wanted Eddie to just stop bringing it up again.
"Hey, man," Puck answered, putting down the book.
"Puckerman! How are you doing?" Eddie said on the other line.
"Good, good. How's Minnie and the kids?"
"Great, got another on the way!" Puck felt a little bit envious of Eddie's idyllic life. Small town, wife and kids, spending everyday just fishing on the lake, with no worries at all about what the fuck he was doing with his life.
"That's awesome, man. Congratulations," Puck responded sincerely.
"How's life been treating you? I heard you got discharged for beating in some guy's face."
"Something like that."
"Where are you? You back in Ohio?"
"No, I'm in New York."
"New York! Wow! What for?"
Puck shrugged, then realized Eddie couldn't see his nonchalant gesture. "Staying with an old friend, just figuring out life, you know?"
"Old friend, huh? Got yourself a lady now?" Eddie relented.
"Yup." He felt a surge of pride, they weren't "dating" or "exclusive" but when had they ever? They operated much better like this. They had a real relationship, and he knew he loved her. In time, it would all come together. He was sure of it.
"What's she like? Which celebrity does she look like?" Eddie asked. Eddie had known Puck a long time, and he was glad his buddy had found a companion, because God knew Puck needed one.
"You know Santana Madison, the supermodel?" He felt funny just saying that.
"Ha! You're telling me your new girlfriend looks like Santana Madison?" Eddie exclaimed in disbelief.
"No, I'm telling you she is Santana Madison," Puck said proudly. He let Eddie's comment about Santana being his girlfriend slide; he liked the way that sounded better anyway.
"No fucking way. You're shitting me, how did you meet her?" Eddie shouted. Puck chuckled.
"I'm not shitting you, man. She's from Lima. Old friends, we went to high school together," Puck said.
"Wow, I don't know how you of all people, the biggest asswipe in all of America scored a total hottie like Santana Madison. Who knew she was from a cowtown too?" Eddie said, astounded.
"Well, you wouldn't be able to tell just looking at her. But she's still my girl."
Eddie was a little bit worried for his pal. Minnie was always reading those tabloids that talked about how celebrities always dated people for a total of like six days, before dumping them and moving on to the next big thing. "For now. No way you can keep up with her kind of lifestyle. She's a supermodel, and we're just all-American boys. You might have her now, but what about next month? You're going to lose her."
He watched the cars on the" interstate" drive by, not that many cars willingly passed through Lima, Ohio. Life was so fucked up right now, and he needed a break. He was going to have a daughter. And he might not ever see her, because Quinn was being a bitch, as usual. Finn wasn't speaking to him, and to be honest, he didn't have many friends despite being Puckasaurus.
He looked around, and saw that small towns in middle America weren't the rustic, cozy towns you saw in calendars. At least not Lima. There were no rolling hills, no bursts of sunshine, no pleasant people. In fact, all he saw were telephone poles and dead grass that the town couldn't afford to water. He saw a red convertible pull up beside his truck. He had expected to be alone, but she had known where he was. The skinny girl got out of her mother's car and walked over to him, hopping up to sit next to him on the edge of his truck. Neither of them acknowledged each other's presence.
"Mama Lopez finally let you take the car again?" he commented, breaking the silence.
"Yeah, no thanks to you," she snapped. Her mother had taken back car privileges when she found a pair of Santana's panties tucked under the seat cushions. She had bitched to him for a month about that.
"Does Ryan know you're here?" he asked solemnly. She was "dating" Ryan Taylor, the center for their basketball team. The guy was okay at basketball, but he was a total douche. He'd confronted Santana about it one day, and she'd just glared at him. She was sick of waiting for him to get his own act together, apparently. The Mercedes thing was the last straw.
"Why does it matter?" she asked. It didn't at all. Ryan was just Ryan. Puck was….more. He let it rest.
A green semi whizzed by, huffing up a miasma of dust. She looked down, and the white of her cheerleading sneakers were thinly coated in brown specks.
"I don't think Quinn is going to keep her," he confided. They both stared forward, squinting at the sight of their little town in the distance.
"No shit, Sherlock," she deadpanned. She was sick of Quinn's baby drama. So what if she was head Cheerio now? She still had to be nice to Quinn and pretend like she didn't give a shit that she was pregnant with his baby. It wasn't worth it.
"What do you think I should do?"
"There's nothing you can do."
Silence. A chair fell off the roof of a beige sedan driving by and tumbled off the roads onto the grass. A family was either moving in or out. Suckers. Santana hoped for their sake that they were leaving this shithole. But if they were just moving in, welcome to Lima! Now you're stuck here forever like the rest of us!
"I slept with Finn," she admitted. She didn't know why she said it out loud. Maybe she just wanted to hear herself say it, or hear what he would say.
"Huh," he said, eyes empty. It was not a clarifying comment; he knew exactly what she said. But he was just too tired of everything to comment on her life. His lack of emotion jerked at her insides. That's it. If he was done with her, fine. She was going to be done with him. Why did she bother to come when she had Ryan waiting for her at Breadstix? She knew better than that. Why did she bother to care anymore at all? She got up again and walked towards her car.
"Wait, Santana!" he called out. Now he was awake. She didn't stop. It wasn't that he didn't care about her anymore, it's just he didn't care about anything really. He had enough on his mind as it was. He was losing her, he knew it. But he was too stressed to do anything about it.
With a pregnant babymama who hated him, what could he do?
"Not this time. We fucked it up in high school when we were just stupid kids, but this is it. I know it, Eddie. This is the real stuff now."
"Well, I'm happy for you then. If she's that important to you."
"She is."
"Then that's that. Listen, thanks for saving my life. You're a true pal," Eddie started, with his ceremonial mushy speech. Oh god.
"No Ed, don't even mention it. It was nothing," Puck protested.
"No it wasn't nothing. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have everything I have now. Remember the day I got sent home? Remember how I said if I made it big, I would pay you back one way or another?"
"I remember. Why?" Puck had only agreed to that on that day because Eddie was slightly delirious from the pain meds, and the guy was going home.
"Well, it's time to pay you back. I hit gold with the stock market. And—"
"No, Eddie. Stop it. You don't have to do that, please." Would Eddie just let it go? He hadn't done anything extraordinary, so he didn't need any prizes or rewards.
"No, you stop it. I'm wiring you 250,000 right now. I know it's not very personal or sentimental, but it's the best I can do," Eddie started.
"What? 250k? You have a baby coming, keep it Ed. Don't sweat it, I don't need that kind of money," Puck objected.
"Yes, you do. Minnie and I talked about it. You're probably just sitting on your ass all day. You have a woman to support now. Your pension can't be that much, and if you're as serious about Santana as you say you are, you'll take this money. Be a man, Puckerman," Eddie forced. Deep down, Puck knew Eddie was right. He was the man, he couldn't just mooch off Santana forever.
"All right, fine. Thank you. You're too generous."
"No, thank you."
"But you know I'm only taking it because I love her so much"
"I know"
Lots of developments in the story and relationship, no? I loved that flashback scene. I thought the setting was really beautiful.
Questions: Answer if you'd like, but I love hearing the responses! And I love suggestions for the story too.
1) So flashback Puck wants to care about Santana but he can't right then because he has a million other things to worry about. Does this perpetual negligence contribute more to their downfall or is it Santana's abandonment later on?
2) There is a significant wealth/status/etc rift between Puck and Santana. How does this affect their relationship, now and in the future? How do you feel about Puck taking the money because he feels he's obligated to "support" her?
Review! Rate it even if you hate it! God, I need to stop using so many exclamation marks...