A/N: Oh dear, seems like I've kept alot of people waiting. Guess its a good thing I decided to update, since some of you think its okay to make promising threats of taking my black cherry. No thank you, I like my butt-hole in tact. Lets see...
Aj-the-stalker: This is how I see that whole skateboard/dougie thing poppin off. kids minding his/her own business, doing that wack ish..then BAM! He/she accidentally runs over a rather large tree branch(conviently put there by me of course) skids face first down a hill, where he will be sexually assaulted by a gang of rabid dogs...doing the dougie on his face! lmao, nahhh that a bit harsh, but you really should of slap the shit outta that kid.
the boxer: I found that ass, lol. Oh yeaaa, you can change yo name as much as you like but I will alwaysfind that ass! My ninjas and I never fail at finding asses...hmm that dint come out right, or did it?:D
anonymous: well sweetums, if you read my profile then you'd know that im whatever you want to be;) I could be Usher and you can be my lil freak, lol. I could tell you now but it kinda takes away from the whole "suave/mysterious" thing I got going on. Buttt if you really wanna know then meet me in my bedroom; Ill tell you right after I luv ya down!;-) Oh, bring the whip cream and handcuffs. Might have to wait like 15 minutes cause I gotta do dishes, but i figure you can help me with that...ya know, I wash, you rinse, and then Ill rinse that ass! lmao, let me stop before I scar you for life.
All my readers: Thanks for your support and for kinda being patient. Read and review, cuntmufflers...luv ya!
Come Again?
"Mannnn, its not like she gonna listen to me! I tried and if you haven't noticed, she too busy tryna chug on Jacobs dick..."
"-Oh please, Bella. She's been staring holes into the side of your face for the past hour. I guarantee she hasn't heard a single word Jacob has said. And talking, Bella, is a whole different subject for you...talking is more like foreplay to you.."
Hehe, that's so true. I shake those thoughts out of my head as Angela eyes me expectantly.
"Look, what do you want me do? She's sooo stubborn! Not to mention self-conscious...she cares way too much about what other people think to even try to let me in."
" Bella, she's human. What do you expect? She's not like you, Bella...cocky, arrogant..not to mention a total perv.."
I couldnt help the lecherous smirk that's no doubt plastered on my face; she's right about the pervin.
"You gotta be delicate with this. Be gentle."
That sounds hella gay to me. Gentle is not my thing.
"Yeah, I agree with Angela." Whoa, where the fuck did Clay Aiken Jr come from?
"What the fuck, cock-ward! How bout a little warning next time..?"
"Well as you would say, 'my bad.'But seriously, I totally agree with Angela. You should talk to her. Your best bet is to get her alone though. That way she wont feel pressured or influenced by anyone else. You and I both know how she gets around everyone else..."
"Pssh! Since when have you taken an interest in your sisters problems? Matter of fact, what the hell do you know about girls, cock-ward? I've never seen, let alone heard you speak of pussy."
"Ugh, do you always have to be so vulgar, Isabella? Its so un-lady like.."
"Oh dont worry about me being un-lady like. I get the feeling that you're lady enough for the both of us. And its Bella!"
"See! You ever think that this is the reason why she wont give you a chance? You're so unbelievably immature that its not even funny."
Thats the second time today that somebody told me I was immature. That should tell me something about myself right? That maybe I need to reevaluate myself?
"Ya know what? You guys are totally right. I've been such an ass lately." I look towards the said girl of my problems before abruptly standing up. "Im gonna talk talk to her. But you, my little smurf," I say to Edward as I ruffle his already messy hair. "You need to tell smurfette over here, that you only let Jasper smurf on your smurf-stick." I dont even try to hold in my laughter as I climb over the couch; but not before I hear Edwards reply.
"Yup. Im afraid its true, Angela." I dont get a chance to hear Angela's reply because im already taking nervous steps towards my target. Im about halfway there when she notices me, and for a second I actually think she's gonna..I dont know, welcome me? But of course thats just wishful thinking when it comes to Rosalie; she completely just ruins the moment and reminds me of why I love to hate her. She perks ups as soon as she catches my eye and just smashes her lips against Jakes. And its then that I realize that im making a mistake; Rosalie is and will always be a beautiful fucking disaster...and im not gonna sit here and make myself look like an idiot. I turn around, intending to continue my pursuit of Angela but im immediately met with a cold stare from Miss virgin suiside.
"YOU! You did this to me," she's holding up a pair of thongs, which seems to be leaking some red kool-aid. Ewww.
"Aye! What the hell is wrong with you!" She's shoving me with her freaking bloody marry panties.
"I thought you were different!" Im doing my best to block both her hits and the panties.
"Hey, hey, hey! Calm down!"
"No, you took my virginity and just..." She pauses and stops her assault, so I take a chance at peeking through my arm guards and notices she eyeing something behind me.
"Jake, what the fuck is this!" Nessie shoves past me and heads straight towards Jacob and Rosalie. I know I probably shouldn't sit here and watch, especially since Jacob will probably murder me if he finds out about Nessie, but what can I say? I love drama.
"What the fuck, Jacob! Im gone for like an hour and you're already pushing up on some random skank!"
Wow, somebody has some nerve. Weren't we just fucking like not even two hours ago? Not that I blame her cause, I mean, Jacobs definitely lacking when it comes to sex.
"Skank!" Oh boy, Rosalie pissed, and not just pissed...sexy pissed. I smell a sexy cat-fight!
"Whoa, whoa, babe. Calm down, okay? Its not what you think..."
Oh its definitely what she thinks alright.
Nessie unleashes her assault on Jake, and even tries to land a few hits on Rosalie, but she's not having any of that; im just standing there with a big dumb ass grinch grin on my face. This is sooo fucking awesome!
" I suggest you get your bitch in line, jacob, before I do it for you."
Oh shit, no she didn't!
I dont know what the fuck happened. All I know is that it got dead quiet and I swear it was like somebody just screamed "chick fighhhttt!" Then all hell broke loose. Im talking full on mayhem; chairs and shit being thrown, and all im trying to is get the hell up outta here. I dont know where the eff Leah is or anybody for that matter.
"Bella! Hmph! Hey, get off me!" I can make out Angela's figure a few feet ahead of me; Some random douche is trying to rub up on her and im doing my best to get to her but its way too much chaos.
"Hey, get the fuck off her!" I dont waste anytime in punching the guy square in the jaw. I grab Angela's hand and I intend on shoving my way past the pissy ass bodies, but my actions are halted when I feel this sharp pain against the side of my face. I feel something cold and wet right after I grab for Angela's hand. I can see bits and pieces of small glass clinging to my shirt, along with blood and the smell of booze. It would seem as if I just got my face crack open by a beer bottle; a present from that douche bag I just punched no dont.
Ouch! Thats really fucked up. This shit fuckin hurts!
Too bad I dont actually get to voice these words, cause not even a moment later im engulfed in total blackness.
Fast forward a bit.
"Isabella? Isabella, can you hear me?" I immediately recognize that voice as Edwards; I might not be fully conscious but I know Edwards the only one that calls me by my full name...that douche!
"Thats Bella to you, ass-ward." I say as my eyes begin to flutter open. I immediately cringe when I come face to face with cock-smith; not my ideal person to wake up to.
"Yeah, she's definitely okay."
I let my eyes readjust to all the familiar faces as I do my best to sit up from what I assume is the couch.
"Bella, maybe you should take it easy?"
"Im good, Ang." I smile brightly but immediately regret it; im painfully reminded of the throbbing in my head.
"What the fuck happend!"
"You fainted. There was a fight..and well things got a bit outta hand. Jake pretty much threw everyone out...aside from us of course."
I hadn't even realized how quiet it was until she mention something; there are still a few people here...but very few.
"How long was I out?"
"Hmm, bout fifteen or twenty minutes. I think you should probably get that looked at," Leah points towards my head which feels like its securely wrapped tight in some kind of clothe. "Jake wanted to call 911 but.."
"-No need. Umm.. Who uh..who..?" I begin, pointing towards the clothe on my head, but the pain is keeping me from continuing.
"I did." I may be slightly dazed at this moment but there's no way I heard correctly, cause that voice sounded just like Rosalie's. She's sitting a few feet away; exactly where my feet is resting with a look of concern etched across her sickeningly beautiful face. I take the time to fully take her in because I know that I probably wont ever see her look so...normal; I then notice the small droplets of stained blood thats coated her dress. Even with the ruined dressed, she still looks beautiful.
Ugh, what the fuck is wrong with me? This is like the third time I said THAT word, and by THAT word I mean beautiful. Bella doesnt do beautiful! Sexy? Yes. Fuckable? Definitely! But beautiful? There's only two people who will ever hear those words and thats my ma and granny.
"Im tellin ya, B. This broad is turning us all mushy and girly and shit. I dont even know who we are anymore. Its like that movie Invasion of The Body Snatchers...but with PUSSY! They just come and turn us into some pussy-whipped bitches! And we dont do pussy-whipped...aint that right, B?"
Damn right Im right! I dont do pussy-whipped! Well maybe if it was pussy with whipped cream, but yeah, I dont do pussy-whipped. And now I know theres definitely something wrong with me because im sitting here having a conversation with myself!
Im so deep in thought that I dont even realize im staring at Rosalie..rather intently; however, I am aware of everyone else's eyes on us. Its almost as if they're trying to gauge our reactions.
"right," I say, finally breaking eye contact and attempting to sit up.
"Bells, I really think you should just take it easy..."
"-Im good, lee. Just need to go to the bathroom." They watch me stumble to my feet. "Anybody?" they stare at me dumbly. "Um, the bathroom...anybody know where it is?"
"Oh! Um, upstairs and to the right I think."
I follow the directions that Leah gives me and sure enough my path leads me to the bathroom. Wonder why I hadn't notice this door before? Oh right, my tongue was way too busy doing delicious things to what's-her-face. Its a shame really, cause this bathroom would of been the perfect place to tongue her down. Scented candles, nice spacious bathtub...ohhh yeah! Could of had a nice time in here...HOLY SHIT!
Thats all I can say as I stare in the mirror. I dont need to remove the clothe to know that my head is pretty much fucked...the evidence is pretty much seeping through the sides.
Its painful but i cant help but think that the scar, which im more than sure I'll have is gonna make me look...I dont know, cooler..edgier?"( If thats even a word)
Ouch! Fuck that hurts! I immediately wince when my fingers graze my face. Smart, Bella. Thats real nice...like it wasn't suppose to hurt?
Not even five minutes after I get into the bathroom, some ass-hole tries barging in.
"Hey shit-head, somebodies in he.." I stop mid-sentence as im once again met with the stunning face of Rosalie fucking Hale. Great.
"Dont you ever knock" I ask as she basically shoves past me to get all the way in. "I mean, I could of been double clicking my mouse for all you know.." Yeah I know, im an ass, but what can I say?
She rolls her eyes, which isn't a surprise. "And some how I dont really put it past you."
And again, blame the ass-hole in me but i cant just not fuck with her. She brought it on herself ya know.
"Soooo you want to see me 'surf the internet' huh?" Theres an audible sigh and then I watch as she crosses her arms and leans against the sink. "I knew you were a freak on the low, " I say flashing her my signature fuck-me-smirk.
"Tch, why do you always have to be such a pervert?" Um maybe because its what I do best? Everybody should know this by now.
"Well, I'll tell you right after you tell ME why YOU always gotta be such an uppity cunt?
Then she does something Im not expecting. She challenges me, but not just any challenge, oh no people, this challenge was that of shit, and by shit I mean shit talking.
"If im a cunt, then you're a cunt guzzling queen!"
"Twat-knockin snarfblaster!
"Apocalyptic pussy pirate!" She's pretty good at this.
"Cock-smith!"
"Shaft-diver!" With each insult our bodies become increasingly closer.
"Yum-yum titty bopper!"
"Cockmanglin Jabbawockee!"
"Mannnn yo ol alabaster skin havin, party in my ass havin, fugley ass mud-duck!" Oh yeah, that was good one. No way she's coming back from that one...
"-Cocktastic, knuckle baby, tit-twat!" Shit that was good one too, and what the fuck is a knuckle baby?
"What the hell is a knuckle baby?"
"You should know. Its what you are and I did get it from your brother after all."
Knuckle baby, knuckle baby...what the fuck is that? And why the hell am I actually thinking about it?
But I cant just not think about it, cause really, what the fuck is it?
"Oh my god. Are you actually thinking about?"
"No!"
"Right. If you really must know...then its the 'residue jizz left on the hand after a guy wanks. According to Emmet, anyway..."
Fuck! Thats actually one of the best insults I've ever heard. Quick, Bella, think of something!
"Oh, okay...Mumf!"
"What? What the hell was that! Not only does that not make sense but its like three minutes after the fact. You cant come back from a come back three minutes later, its irrelevant!"
This whole conversation is irrelevent so what's her point?
"Well frankly m'dear, I dont give a fuck. And again, it doesnt have to make sense, sweet cheeks, cause Im totally awesome!"
"Whatever."
its quiet for a moment, she's staring off to the side, trying to avoid my gaze.
"Ya know, Rosalie," I begin, finally getting her full attention. "I have to admit that Im kinda surprised. I mean, I never knew you were fluent in the art of speaking Bullshit." I end my remark with a genuine smile, which seems to surprise her; she seems much more relaxed by this.
"Yeah well, guess theres alot you dont know about me. But I guess I have Emmet to thank for those comments..."
"Oh, yeah? Guess there isn't alot that I know about you...specially one being the fact that you like to conviently tongue fuck random guys right in front of me!" Well so much for the moment of softness, that glare is back full force.
"Oh please! You're one to talk...im not the one hookin up with bloody fucking Marry, and her red kool-aid stained panties!"
"touche', Rosalie. But why do you care?"
"I dont." She says, wiggling her head like a snake.
"Right. If you dont care, then why are you here, right now, at this very moment?"
"I..I dont care. I just came to give you this ice-pack." Which she just so happened to conviently have outta nowhere.
I can only shake my head. "Again, Rosalie. If you dont care about me, or what I do...then why are you here, with me? Shouldn't you be out there sluttin that butt for teen wolf?"
She concentrating hard on the floor, biting her lip and more than likely trying to come up with an excuse.
"See, you cant even be honest with yourself. Not even when its just you and me..."
"-Ugh! I dont have to explain myself to you!" She throws the pack at my chest and moves to the door, she's wiggling the handle fiercely but it wont open.
"What the hell is wrong with this door!"
"Rose, here...let me do it..."
"No, I got it!" My hands grasps for hers and the doorknobs. "I said I got it!"
"You're pulling it too hard!" (hehe, thats what she said) Wow that sounds highly sexual. "Rose, you're gonna break...," no sooner than the words leave my mouth, theres a distinct sound of metal clanking and nails hitting the floor; we're staring dumbly at the handle in our hands. "It." She whips her head upward and looks at me as if its my fault.
"Great, now look at what you did..."
"-Me! Im not the one who came barging in here like a fuckin chimpanzee, going ape-shit and literally flying off the fucking handle!"
"Whatever." Ugh, I swear thats like her comeback for everything!
So im officially stuck in this fucking bathroom with the one person who loves to hate me. Im laying in the tub, while she's leaning against the door and fiddling with her phone.
"Gah! You've got to be kidding me, theres no reception in this freaking bathroom..." I calmly whistling a tune, which ironically just so happens to be trapped in the closet.
"I mean its been like what, fifteen minutes? You'd think somebody would be worried about us."
Thats probably because they think we're fucking, which doesnt sound like a bad idea.
"Did you tell anybody that you were up here...did they see you?"
"No, and not that I know of."
Thats smart. "So wait. You came here out of sheer will...not because they forced you?"
"-I wouldn't think too much into it to, if I were you."
"Fucks sake, why do you feel the need to get so damn defensive about everything? You never let your guard down!"
"And why would I need to do that? You dont." I sit up slightly to her response so that my upper half is leaning over the tubs edge.
"Yeah, I know. But I am now. Im being completely open and honest with you right now...or at least Im willing to be." Her only retort is to huff, so I take that as my initiative. "Look, lets just be real for a moment mkay? Its only you and me, Rose, so just stop..stop being so afraid..."
"-Afraid? Im not afraid of anything."
"You are afraid, Rose. If you weren't then you'd be honest with yourself."
"Honest about what, Bella! Hmm?" Welp, thats angers back..and full force.
"About you and me."
"You and me? There is no you and me, nor will there ever be!" She turns her attention back to her phone as if we're done talking. Uh news flash bitch: It aint over until the fat lady's singing, and I damn sho as hell aint hear no acapella! I abruptly stand from my previous position and make my way towards her; she eyes me cautiously as I a take a seat beside her so that we're shoulder to shoulder.
"Rose," I say, taking her hand in mines to which she immediately tenses. " I know you can feel this, that undeniable pull. Look me in the eye and tell me you dont feel something for me."
"Bella, please just stop..." She's still not looking at me but I can tell by the way her voice wavers, almost pleadingly, that she can indeed feel it.
"No, just listen okay? Why did you come up, honestly?"
"I told you, why..."
"-Yes, but theres something more than just the ice-pack, isn't there?" She still quiet but im not giving up so easily. "Listen, im not one to get all deep and connected with my feeling and shit. But I see now that thats exactly what im gonna have to do." Time to women up, Bella...but be gentle. I take her head into my hands and force her to meet my gaze."Rosalie Lillian Hale, I like you. If you already noticed that, then yeah. Its true. I like you alot actually...so much that it drives me insane...you drive me insane." Her hands tightly grasp my fore-arms in an attempt to brace herself for what coming next. "I want to be with you, and I know you're scared for what ever reason, but if you let me...I know I can make you happy. I wont let you down like Mike did..." I feel her relax to my touch, and I inwardly fist-pump at the thought of her finally opening up. Bout fuckin time, cause I swear all this sweet, tender, mushy shit is gonna give me diabetes!
"Bella, thats not...thats not why im scared. I mean yeah, I dont wanna get hurt and all that. But I dont give a shit about Mike Newton...he never.." She stops mid-sentence and I watch as her eyes scan my face. "Never what, Rose?" I have no clue why im whispering and I honestly dont give a shit right, I just want her finish...I want to know what shed thinking.
"He never made me feel like how you make me feel..." My heart is hammering in my chest right now and I just pray I dont start stuttering like an idiot, which I always tend to do when im nervous.
"What..what do I make you feel like?"
"Nervous..." Oh you aint the only one. "Like I matter. But you really just make me feel like..." She stops once again, but this time she bites her lip.
"Like...like what, Rose...like what?" Im almost ashamed at how eager I am to find out but whatever.
"Like I want to fuck you...all the time." Its dead fucking quiet in here right now, and the only reason, I repeat...the only reason for this is because Im trying to figure out what the fuck I just heard. I mean really, what the fuck? I was so expecting her to say something along the lines of, "like I cant breathe when you look at me." Or " You make me feel like I can be or do anything," But wanting to fuck me...all the time? yeah, im way off with my assumptions.
My first instinct is to say "come again?" and then laugh because I said come. But we're just gonna go with the subtle route. "Ummm what?" But the only answer I get is her lips crashing against mine, and she aint fighting it so why should I?
Before I know it. Where both pushing each other against the wall and sink; how we got to our feet is beyond me.
"Ouch, ouch, ouch...head remember?" I pant out, finally breaking apart for air. "Shit. Im sorry," she mumbles against my lip, but she and I are both way too far gone off our lust to actually care about my head. She's fumbling with my shirt as I place hot, sloppy, wet kisses any and everywhere I can see. Finally after struggling for what seems like forever, I just rip the damn thing in two; she seems satisfied enough. I place her on top of the sink and she gladly opens her legs to me; I glide between them in ease and grab hold of her moistened thongs.
"God, Im so fuckin wet for you right now, Bella." Oh theres no need to remind me of that fact cause im fully aware of it. " I want you to make cum so fuckin hard for you..." Her teeth grab at my bottom lips as my muscles clench under her soft hands. Good lord! She talking so naughty right now...I just might cum on myself from that alone! My only reaction to both her words and the feeling of her tongue on my ear is to rip her thongs and invade her body.
"Mmm," she moans as Bella jr works her magic, making sure to pay extra attention to her button.
"Make me cum, Bella. Please make me cum!" Oh come on! begging too? Shes really making this hard for me...literally. Wet and fucking hard.
"Ima make you cum, Rose. Ima make you cream like...oatmeal creme...pie?" I find myself inwardly slapping myself for my weak attempt at dirty talk, and the look on her face tells me she wouldn't mind slapping me either; think I might of killed the mood. "Bella..what the..? Ya know what, i dont even wanna know...just..dont speak mkay?"
"Whatever you want."
"Good, now dont stop." And I dont, I fuck her with all my might.
"You looked so good this morning when you were doing the lawn. All sweating and glistening...I just wanted to lick you..," she pants, undoing the belt on my pants and roughly grabbing my bare ass. "Oh fuck, what are you doing?" She shushes me with her lips and works her hands to the front of my jeans. "I told you I wanted to fuck you...and thats exactly what Im gonna do." I suddenly find myself on my back against cold tiled floor with me still deep inside her, and with her very much inside of me. Shes riding my fingers like crazy, but then something happens. Her body tenses, her pussy lets out this weird sound, something Ice heard about but never really witnessed. Im about to commit on it but then she just flips; its like she just transforms into this crazy ol mega beast.
"Im gonna cum, Bella! Dont stop, dont ever fucking stop!" She starts riding me harder, head whipping back and forth while her body thrashes against mine; its hot but its scaring the shit out of me...specially the whole demon voice thing shes got going on. "I...I wont stop, I promise. Just...just be gentle...dont hurt me."
"Say my name!" She basically roars, while pitching my nipple...rather hard.
"W..what?"
"I said, say my name! What's my name you dirty slut!" She barks again , pinching me much harder this time.
"Ouch...Rose, its Rose okay?" Okay, im officially beyond scared right now. I mean im all for rough sex but this beyond rough. I lets my fingers search for that one spot thats soon send her reeling.
"Oh-fuck-oh-fuck, im cumming!" And sure enough, not a moment after she declares this I feel that warm liquid coating my fingers. She hums my name tiredly as she comes down from her high; her lips place a gentle kiss to my collar bone and i rub her back in response.
"Thats was amazing." She mumbles against my chest. Id be lying if I said Im not feeling a bit awkward at this moment, cause really, how the hell do you act normal after that?
"Yeah, it was...interesting to say the least." She leans up slightly to see my face and I met with a look of confusion and what seems like sadness?
"You...you didnt like it?"
"No it not that..."
"-cause I mean...you didnt come and..." Oh crap, shes starting to feel insecure.
"Rose, no dont do that. It was great...it was a bit intense but I liked it...alot."
"But why didnt you cum with me?"
"Its just take me longer than most people is all...but that doesnt mean i didnt like it, okay? You were hot. Especially when you queefed..." Once again, blame the asshole in me but i have to fuck with her. And I know, I just know this is going to embarrass her...so why not?
"When I what?" She asks in a confused manner.
"Ya know, when you farted."
" What? I did no such thing! I think I'd remember that..." I cant help but laugh at the pink tinge making its way to her cheeks.
"Relax, Rose. Its not what you think. A queef is when you fart...out of your vagina." And just like that she becomes impossibly red.
"Awe, dont do that," I say, reaching for her hands that are firmly planted on her face. "Its nothing to be embarrassed about. Its hot. It just means that i know how to work it." I grin like a Cheshire cat when she finally gazes at me; the look on her face is priceless. Its makes it seem as though she saying "Oh really now?
"So you know how to work it now, huh? Where was all that cocky shit when you were actually doing it?" She teases, making me ALMOST turn a shade redder.
"Doesnt matter where it was before...its here now." I reply seductively, rubbing her inner thighs to make my point clear. "Oh really now, Bella?"
"Hell yeah, girl. Rosetta stone dont got shit on me. I'll have yo kitty talkin in a hundred different languages when im done."
"You sure about that, Bella? My kitties special, its speaks a special language...I dont think you'd understand it..."
"Oh trust me," I begin, trying to gather my barings as her tongue marks a path down my body. "Im a fast learner...and im fluent in every language that revolves around pussy."
"Hmm. Well thats good to know, but right now I want to make your kitty purr for me." I dont even have time to reply because my senses are on overload. She somehow managed to get my pants fully off and is now teasing the wetness that flooding between my legs.
"HOLY FUCK!" I dont even try to hold in my excitement as she hums and sucks on my most sensitive spot; my only reaction is to fist my hand into her, which is a big no no.
"Not the hair, Bella..."
"Really, Rose?" I weeze out when she abruptly stops her delicious torture. "Must you be vain now, at this very moment?"
"Not my hair, Bella...I mean it..." Im about to retort, but then she gives me an alternative; she clasps our hands together and goes to work.
"Oh fuck, right there!" My body tenses when her tongue grazes a particular area, driving me mad drunk with lust; its becoming increasingly harder not to yank her hair.
Meanwhile...
Leah's Pov
"Um maybe one of us should go look for them?" Edward says, eyeing me expectantly.
"Nah. I dont think thats such a good idea..."
"Oh? And why is that? They could be fighting..."
"Or fucking," I mumble to myself.
"what was that?"
"Ohhh nothing. Look dont worry your pretty little head. They're fine..just trust me.
"But how do you know?" He retorts while walking towards the stairs. "Im telling you, Edward. You dont wanna do thattt...might not like what you find." He of course is already making his way up there, but not a moment after I tell him otherwise, an earth shattering scream resounds in the house. I look of horror crosses Edwards features as he descends half the flight of stairs; and well I think its safe to say that Bella just came down from her high.
"See, told ya you didn't wanna go up there...they're...good." I pat him on the back as he just sits there with that same look of horror on his face. "Was that...did they?" "Yes, Edward. That was exactly what you think it is."
Back in the bathroom...
"Wow, Rose. That was...just wow." Im leaning against the the side of the tub in post orgasmic bliss.
"That good, huh?"
"Yeah. Think that was probably the best Ice ever had. You sure you've never done that before?"
"Nope. You're my first and only." She smiles sweetly and reaches for my hand to which I mimic. Her first and only, I like that thought. And then a funny thought crosses my mind.
"Rose?"
"Hmm?"
"You give good knowledge. I dont think I'll ever have to worry about my kids being dumb." I break into uncontrolled fits of laughter, which earns me a playful shove from Rosalie.
"Oh shut up...and return the favor." She responds right before theres a knock at the door.
"Who ever that is can just fuck off...so she can get off!
A/N: So yeah, I do believe this maybe the end of this fic my good readers. I say maybe because there is a little bit of extra stuff that didnt make it into some chapter, so i might just dedicate a chapter to all the lost scenes that didnt make it.
That whole "pussy talking" scene was dedicated to a special reader, who im pretty sure knows who they are.
I was watching Dont be a Menace... While writing that sex scene too, particularly the part in the movie where Marlon Wayans has sex with the shy girl and she turns all beastly and shit. So I thought to myself why not?
For those who dont understand the joke about Rosalie giving good knowledge..I'll explain. Knowledge is the same thing as head, or brain, or in simple terms oral.