A/N: Thanks again for all of the fic love. I'm glad a lot of you enjoyed Alex's parents. Our girls get a little "closer" in this chapter, but there's still a T rating. :)

"Scared of a world outside you should go explore, pull all the shades and wander the great indoors."

Ever since Olivia had given Alex that mix CD, it had never left her stereo. She had the track listing memorized and she already knew all of the lyrics. Most of the songs were sentimental, or at least they were sentimental by Olivia's standards. The more she listened to the CD and analyzed the lyrics, the more she began to wonder if these were the songs Olivia usually listened to or if she had made this CD especially for her. Even if it wasn't made for her, Alex liked to pretend it was.

She hadn't seen too much of Olivia ever since the basketball game and she wondered if it was because of her parents. When the four of them went out to dinner, they began questioning Olivia and she tensed up. Had Alex known they had wanted to ask her questions, she would have briefed them on which topics were appropriate and which topics were off limits. Every topic they discussed at dinner would have made Alex's "off limits" list. Alex was thrilled when they started talking about basketball and the highlights of Olivia's game, but soon they began to ask why her mother wasn't there. Alex noticed Olivia's facial expression change and she went from hurriedly eating her cheeseburger to saying that she wasn't hungry anymore. She told Alex's parents that the reason her mother wasn't there was because she had taught a late class. Alex knew it was a lie, but she assumed Olivia had a reason why she was lying so she didn't call her out on it. Mrs. Cabot, on the other hand, wanted to know why her mother didn't cancel that class so she could see her daughter play in the championship game. She then asked Olivia if her mom had gone to any of her games that season and Olivia told her she hadn't because she was too busy.

When dinner was over, Mr. and Mrs. Cabot had given the girls some privacy, but Olivia left without even giving Alex a goodbye kiss. Alex wanted to think it was because her parents were nearby and she didn't want to get Alex in trouble, but she knew that wasn't the reason. She had a feeling Olivia was having another one of her mood swings and she wanted to know what the cause of it was. She decided to pick up her phone and call Olivia. When Olivia didn't answer, Alex knew she had to see her. Her parents had grounded her, but their punishment had been lifted once she argued that they were in a relationship when they were even younger than Alex so she shouldn't be in trouble for kissing Olivia. She was now free to see Olivia whenever she wanted, but she still couldn't be Olivia's girlfriend. Alex wanted to know their reasoning behind it, but she knew questioning her parents would probably earn her another girlfriend-less year and she couldn't wait another day to be Olivia's girlfriend.

When Alex headed over to Olivia's that day in mid-March, she decided to wear her beanie even though the weather was already starting to warm up. "Just one more week and I'm hers," she thought as she approached Olivia's building.

Olivia answered the door with swollen eyes and a red nose. Without a second thought, Alex entered her apartment and hugged Olivia. She knew Olivia wasn't having a mood swing; something had to have happened to her.

"I'm so glad you're here," she told Alex.

"Me, too," Alex absentmindedly responded. "Do you want to lie down on your bed with me?"

Olivia didn't get a chance to respond before Alex began leading the way. Alex looked around Olivia's room in disbelief. The neatly-organized shelves were now empty, their contents tossed on the floor.

"I know why she hates me," Olivia said once they were lying on her bed.

"Your mom?" Alex asked.

"She never wanted to be my mom," Olivia admitted. "But she was always told that abortion was morally wrong so that's why she kept me."

"But how did she—"

"She was raped," Olivia interrupted. "Some guy raped her and that's how she got pregnant with me. I knew there was a reason why she hated me and now I know why. She says I look like him. Do you think I'll be like him, too? Am I that type of person? Have I ever forced myself on you, Alex?"

"No!" Alex insisted. "Olivia, you've always respected me. If anything, I'm the one who wants to have sex. Do you want to—"

"Do I want to talk about it?" Olivia asked. "No, I don't."

Alex began kissing Olivia's tear-stained cheeks. Olivia didn't want to talk about what her mom had told her and she knew she shouldn't ask any questions. It was something she had learned over time with Olivia. As she rested her head on Olivia's chest and listened to her heartbeat, she started to wonder how Olivia's mom had revealed to her daughter that she was a product of rape. Were they sitting down and having a conversation? Did Olivia ask her about it? Was she angry and yelling at Olivia? She imagined how Olivia must have felt when she found out about this. She was already down on herself and this must have made her feel so much worse.

"Olivia?"

"What, Alex?"

"Nothing."

"It's never 'nothing' with you," Olivia pointed out. She kissed Alex on top of her head and started to gently rub her arms. "You're cold, babe."

"A little," Alex said. She was relieved when Olivia grabbed a nearby blanket and covered them with it. The blanket wasn't enough to reassure Olivia, though. She wrapped her arms around Alex to make sure she was warm.

"Better?"

"Much better," Alex told her. "Are you sure you want company? I know how you prefer to be alone sometimes."

"You're not company," Olivia insisted. "You're practically my girlfriend. I'm comfortable with you here. Even if I want to shut out the world, that doesn't include you, Alex. I feel like you're a part of me. You brought something out in me that I can't even begin to explain."

"Olivia?"

"Yes, babe?"

Alex knew she was ready and this was the perfect opportunity for her to finally confess everything she was feeling for Olivia. She had a speech prepared, but she couldn't get the words to form. Instead, there were only three little words that were able to escape her lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Olivia said and kissed her.

"You do?"

"Alex, yes," Olivia insisted. "I've been wanting to tell you that for a long time."

"So have I," Alex confessed. "I'm so in love with you. It's like I do everything with you in mind."

"Like?"

"Like, I've already planned our life together."

"Tell me about this life," Olivia said, tightening her hold on Alex. "I want to know everything you have planned."

"I want us to get an apartment together when we're in college," Alex began. "I can't imagine living apart from you after high school. There's this really nice neighborhood we can live in. It's away from all of the undergrads and there are other young couples there. We'll fit in perfectly. I keep imagining going to all of your games and then making mad, passionate love after every victory."

"Just after every victory?" Olivia teased.

"No," Alex insisted. "We're going to make love every night and every morning and after every victory and even after every loss."

"I like the way you say that."

"What?" Alex asked.

"Instead of saying you want us to have sex, you're saying you want us to make love," Olivia told the beautiful blonde who was now looking deeply into her eyes.

"Because it's not just going to be sex with us," Alex informed the now smiling Olivia.

"I know, babe," Olivia began. "It's only been a few days since my mom told me how I was conceived. Because of what happened to her, my mom has such a negative attitude toward sex, but I don't want to be like that. I want to know that it can be beautiful and meaningful and it can actually be between two people who love each other."

"Like us?" Alex asked.

"Like us," Olivia insisted.

"I want to make love to you," Alex said softly. She had lost the quiver in her voice and she was more certain about this than she had ever been about anything before.

Olivia didn't need to respond. She pulled Alex in for a deep kiss.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Alex asked, just to be certain.

"Yeah," Olivia told her. "Are you?"

"Yes," Alex said.

Alex and Olivia didn't know whether to undress each other or undress themselves so after debating back and forth, they decided to undress themselves. Their clothes ended up piled on the floor. As they were standing up, completely naked in front of each other for the first time, Alex moved the arm she was using to hide her breasts and the hand that she was using to cover her most private area. "This is me," she nervously told Olivia once her body was fully exposed. She wished she could have said something more articulate, but she was too busy looking at Olivia. She had looked at an issue of Playboy once and she had seen pictures of naked women, but this was the first time she had seen an actual girl naked and standing right in front of her. She looked at the patch of dark curls on Olivia's private area. She wasn't waxed like the women in the magazines and her chest wasn't a D-cup. Alex noticed that Olivia's breasts were still developing, just like hers were. Alex and Olivia weren't perfect, but it didn't matter because they knew they were perfect for each other.

Alex made her way over to Olivia and started to kiss her. Olivia gripped Alex's waist with her hands and firmly pressed herself against her so there was no space in between their naked bodies.

"Bed?" Alex asked, unable to form any other words than that single syllable.

"Yeah," Olivia responded after another minute of nibbling on Alex's neck.

Neither of them knew exactly what they were supposed to do, so they decided to just go with what felt right. They began touching each other's bodies, but their touching was more of an awkward fumbling. They paid too much attention to each other's breasts because they were nervous about touching each other anywhere lower.

"I love you," Olivia told her. "It's okay if you touch me, Alex. If I'm not comfortable with something you're doing I'll tell you and I want you to do the same for me."

"I love you, too," Alex responded. "And, okay, I will."

Alex started clutching the sheets when Olivia began to taste her. She had never imagined anything could feel so wonderful. She wanted to taste Olivia, but Olivia insisted on waiting until Alex had climaxed. She felt her whole body start to tense up. She knew what she was experiencing with Olivia would bring them closer together but she was still nervous about tasting her. She worried about being grossed out or not knowing what to do, but she soon learned that there was no need for her to worry. She loved the way Olivia tasted and she also loved the way she could get Olivia's body to respond to every movement of her tongue.

"What do I taste like?" Alex asked once they were cuddling.

"I don't know," Olivia told her. "But I like it. What do I taste like?"

"It doesn't really have a flavor," Alex responded. "It's just…I don't know. I can't describe it, but I love the way you taste."

Alex didn't know what came over her, but she gently ran her finger along Olivia's opening. She then placed her finger on Olivia's lips and watched as Olivia slowly sucked her own wetness off of it.

"That's you," Alex said. She tried to be confident, but she couldn't stop herself from blushing.

"Don't blush," Olivia teased. She then did the same thing and watched as Alex slowly licked her own wetness off of Olivia's finger. "That's you, Alex."

"I love you so much," Alex said and started kissing Olivia.

The girls cuddled for another hour before Alex realized it was time for her to leave. Her parents would be waiting and she didn't want to do anything to upset them. While walking home, she tried to hide her excitement, but she couldn't help it. After making love to Olivia, Alex began seeing the world differently. She saw beauty in things she had never seen beauty in before and she couldn't stop herself from smiling.

"I love Olivia Benson and I'm going to marry her someday!" Alex randomly shouted out when she was approaching her building. To her misfortune, her dad was outside talking to their neighbor and he had heard everything his daughter had just said.

"Alexandra!" Mr. Cabot called out. "You better not have a girlfriend. I don't care if it's one week before your birthday."

"I don't have a girlfriend, Daddy," Alex insisted. She further avoided her Dad and their neighbor and went inside so she could call Olivia. It had been less than half an hour since they had seen each other, but Alex already missed Olivia and she had to hear her voice.